A Thousand Water Bombs (6 page)

‘So what was wrong with Copper Pie yesterday?’ I asked.

‘I don’t know. Didn’t you ring him?’

‘No,’ I said. Normally I would have done, but with the fair, the email, slavery . . . I’d forgotten he was ill.

‘He’ll be at school today. He’d have to be dying from orange-hair fever for his mum to let him stay home two days.’

But he wasn’t. Maybe he
had
contracted orange-hair fever. I texted him, but nothing came bleeping back.

Instead of a proper lesson, Miss Walsh asked us all to go through our plans for the fair.

‘It’s worth spending an hour now to make sure none of you forget anything essential on Saturday. We want to put on a good show for the parents, don’t we?’

‘Yes, Miss,’ said Jamie. Callum’s other half.

‘Why don’t we start with you then, Jamie? Who are you teamed up with?’

‘I’m with Callum . . .’ They’re always together – no one else likes them. ‘. . . and Copper Pie.’

I must have misheard. And so must all the other kids in our class, who had their mouths hanging open. And so must Miss Walsh.

‘Did you say you were with Callum
and
Copper Pie?’

Jamie nodded. And turned to smile at me, and then Fifty, and then Jonno and then Bee.

‘Well, pop up here, Jamie and Callum. Copper Pie’s off sick so you’ll have to explain the stall without him.’

I didn’t know what was going on but the one thing I knew for sure was that Copper Pie was
not
doing a stall with them. They were trying to wind us up. As soon as our fellow Triber
was back at school he’d be on the water bombs, as agreed. And they’d be high on his list of victims.

‘It’s called Save or Score,’ said Callum. ‘I’m the goalie, Copper Pie’s the scorer. If you score three goals against me, or save three shots from Copper Pie,
you win a fiver. Jamie’s doing the money.’

‘That sounds excellent,’ said Miss Walsh. ‘We’ve talked about trying to pick a stall that uses your talents and you’ve clearly taken notice of that.’

They carried on talking about details: a sign, somewhere to keep the money and rules about how close the shooter could get to the goal. I wanted to interrupt and explain that it wouldn’t
be happening, unless they found another shooter, but after the slave and suffragette comments Tribe didn’t need more trouble. I made they’re-completely-mental faces at the other Tribers
instead.

Roddy did his and Harry’s stall and then Bee stood up and introduced the Give and Take and Fifty did the water bombs.

‘I trust you’ll issue a health warning with each sale,’ said Miss Walsh. ‘We don’t want soaked teachers, or parents.’

Fifty made a serious face. ‘Absolutely, Miss. We wouldn’t want that either.’

Alice went next. She gave a demonstration of her face painting, making Molly into a monkey. She said she’d been practising. It looked like someone had rubbed Molly’s face in the
mud.

It went on and on. The usual things: Lucky Dip, Splat the Rat, Stick the (Blu-Tack) Tail on the Donkey, Guess the Name of the Teddy.

If I’d stopped to think about it I might have wondered why we hadn’t seen much of Copper Pie the week before the fair. But there was too much going on. Even when
Callum and Jamie told us Copper Pie was doing a stall with them, I didn’t believe there was anything wrong. My faith in my friend was one hundred percent. And the others felt the same. We
stood under the trees on our patch at break and this is how the conversation went:

Bee: ‘Are they mad? Copper Pie with Callum – I don’t think so.’

Jonno: ‘Maybe they took advantage of the fact he’s ill to make up a story.’

Me: ‘As if we’d ever believe a Triber would pal up with enemy number one.’

Fifty: ‘Same.’

Me: ‘But I wish Copper Pie was here to tell them to get lost.’

Fifty: ‘Same.’

Bee: ‘I don’t feel as though I’ve seen him all week, but I know I have.’

Jonno: ‘He was away yesterday.’

Fifty: ‘And the days he was here we were stuck in the art room.’

Me: ‘And he was playing football.’

Fifty: ‘He could have helped, couldn’t he?’

Jonno: ‘Do you blame him for not? You still look like you’re wearing lipstick.’

Fifty: ‘I’m never ever using my mouth as a tool again. It hurts to drink.’

Jonno: ‘Talking of which, shouldn’t we be finishing them off?’

Bee: ‘No need. I’ve got a team in there doing it –
with
the Head’s approval.’

Fifty: ‘I don’t know how you managed it but thank you, thank you.’

He went down on his knees and did fake weeping. Everyone started laughing and that was the end of that. It was two days until the fair. The water bombs were ready and we’d got away with
the email. I was looking forward to raking in the money and spending some on the Splat the Rat. I wasn’t even a teeny bit worried. Maybe if we’d talked about it some more we’d
have realised something was up. If we’d put together the facts maybe we’d have worked it out. But we didn’t. So on Friday, when I saw Copper Pie hanging around by the gates as
usual, I was pleased to see my old friend back at school.

COPPER PIE’S FAMILY

(MUM, DAD, C.P., CHARLIE)

IN THE KITCHEN BEFORE SCHOOL

C.P.:
I do. You know I do. But I can’t do it, Dad.

Mum:
Won’t. He means won’t.

Charlie
: Mummy —

Mum:
Shut up, Charlie.

Dad:
All this fuss about a few water bombs.

C.P.:
It’s not about that. It’s about doing the stall with Callum.

Dad:
Nothing wrong with Callum. He’s got a good eye for the ball.

C.P.:
But he’s not my friend.

Dad:
We’re talking about football here, boy. You don’t have to hold his hand.

C.P.:
But if I do the stall with Callum, I’ll let
my
best friends down.

Mum:
They’d let you down without a second thought, that lot.

C.P.:
That’s where you’re wrong. They wouldn’t. Ever.

Dad:
Don’t shout at your mother.

C.P.:
She’s shouting at me.

Dad:
Listen.
You
are doing the Save or Score with Callum and that’s final. Simon’s staying behind to watch you. When are you gonna get a chance like
this again? He’s a flipping football scout and instead of heading back up north to see his family he’s STAYING BEHIND TO WATCH YOU. It’s about priorities, boy.

Charlie:
Daddy —

Dad:
Shut up, Charlie boy. This is serious. I haven’t told the school he’s been sick and kept him home to practise so your big brother can mess about with
water bombs. I haven’t taken two days off work to stand in goal and coach your brother for nothing. Saturday could change his life. D’you hear me? Saturday could change his life.

summer fair eve

‘You’ll never guess,’ I said to Copper Pie.

‘You’ll never guess what those two morons have been saying about you,’ said Fifty.

‘You’ll never guess the ridiculous story they’ve been putting about,’ said Bee.

‘You will never in a trillion years believe what Callum and Jamie have told the whole class,’ said Jonno.

We waited for Copper Pie to ask us to tell him the crazy story . . . We waited for him to say, ‘Spill, guys. What’s been happening?’ But he didn’t. He looked at the
floor. He moved a bit of dirt around with his foot. He put his hands in his pockets . . . and took them back out. Something was up. Even a geek like me could tell. Something was up.

‘Don’t you want to know?’ said Jonno.

There was a silence where there should have been talking.

‘I think he already knows.’ Fifty’s five words were like five poison darts.

‘I’d like to hear it from him,’ said Bee, moving her hair out of her eyes and looking straight at Copper Pie. Her stare seemed to force his head up. And the answer was in his
eyes.

‘Why?’ I said. ‘Why would you . . .?’

My brain couldn’t compute the data. Copper Pie would never team up with Callum. I needed to hear it from him, like Bee said.

‘It’s only a stall at the fair,’ he said.

‘No, it’s not,’ I said, loudly. ‘It’s . . .’ I didn’t know what it was. But it was bad, really bad.

‘It’s betrayal,’ said Bee. ‘You’re out, Copper Pie. You’re out of Tribe. If you go off with Callum, you’re not one of us. You’re not a
Triber.’

He looked at us. We all shook our heads. Fifty was the first to turn away. Jonno and Bee followed, but I couldn’t leave it like that.

‘Copper Pie, why do you want to do it with Callum? I thought you were dead keen on the water bombs.’ I paused to see if he would answer. He didn’t. ‘I know you love
football but it’s not worth it – losing Tribe to score a few goals at the summer fair.’

‘I know, Keener. I do. But Dad’s arranged for the scout to come and watch me. He set it all up. Rang Callum’s dad so I had someone good to play against. I’m stuck in the
middle.’

Do you know what empathy means? It means you imagine what it would be like to be in someone else’s shoes. I had a go. I tried to picture me, Keener, as a fantastic football player being
given a chance to play in front of someone who could make me a champion. My feet were in Copper Pie’s football boots but all I could see was Callum’s sick grin and the Tribers on the
sideline looking disgusted.

‘Couldn’t the scout watch you another day? When you’re playing a proper match? That would be better, wouldn’t it?’

‘But he’s hardly ever down this way. Dad says it’s my only chance.’

If it was his
only
chance to be a star, maybe we
should
let him go off with the enemy?

I had another think. This time I tried to imagine it was me and
my
one chance of glory: world surfing champion Kelly Slater was coming to watch me, but to catch the surf when it was
cooking and have a chance of riding a fat wave I had to leave Tribe. It didn’t work, because I couldn’t think why I’d ever have to leave Tribe and anyway the others would think it
was super cool to be talent-spotted by a surf dude.

‘Come on, Copper Pie,’ I said.

‘No. I’ll stay here.’ I didn’t want to leave him there but I did. I left him kicking the dirt . . . and arrived at our patch at the same time as
Callum
.

‘Hello Tribe. Looking forward to tomorrow? You can have a free go if you like. No chance of any of you winning a fiver against me and Copper Pie. But then you know how good he is,
don’t you? Because he’s your mate.’

It was unbearable.

‘Actually we’re cool with it,’ said Jonno. He really winds Callum up when he does that it’s-no-big-deal thing.

‘Liar,’ said Callum, as he walked off.

‘Well . . .’ I said.

‘Well what, Keener?’ said Bee.

‘I spoke to Copper Pie.’

‘We got that. And?’ I don’t know why she was being stressy with me.
I
hadn’t gone off with the enemy.

‘And it’s to do with the football scout.’

I explained but I could see the Tribers weren’t about to run over and forgive him. And I could see why. As usual it was Jonno who put it into actual words.

‘You know the thing is, if he’d told us about the scout and his dad’s plan, we
might
have been all right about it, even though it’s with Callum. But he
didn’t. He left Callum to tell us. That’s not what friends do. And it’s not what Tribers do.’

‘I agree,’ said Bee. ‘He knew all week, I reckon. That’s why he was avoiding us – kicking his ball and never tying water bombs. He’s chicken.’

I didn’t like her saying that. Copper Pie a coward!

‘Same,’ said Fifty. ‘If he’d explained it to me
before
, I’d have said, “Go for it mate.” After all, he can do a stall with Callum and still
detest him. I mean, he plays football with him every week and that’s never bothered us.’

‘So what do we do?’ said Bee.

No one said anything. It was too awful to think he had to leave.

‘Let’s wait,’ said Jonno. ‘Let’s see if
he
does anything. He’s the one who’s deceived us.’

So we waited. We waited all day. He didn’t come near our patch. He didn’t say one word to any of us. I walked home with Fifty, and as he headed off to his house he said, ‘Looks
like this is it then. We’re down to four Tribers. See you, Keener.’

‘Bye,’ I said. I felt really, really unhappy. The sort of unhappy that makes you forget you’ve ever laughed, or had fun, or caught an uncatchable wave, or been excited. I
walked slowly home, thinking, thinking, thinking. And in a way it worked, because by the time I got home I knew something. I knew that I wasn’t giving up on Copper Pie that easily. There were
still twenty-two hours until the summer fair was declared officially open. That’s what I knew.

lift-off minus 22 hours

As I rocked from side to side in my hammock, thoughts went back and forwards and came back again. I was sure we could still be Tribe, as long as Copper Pie didn’t
actually
go through with it. But how to stop him?

If only I
could
change Copper Pie’s mind.

‘I’m going round to Copper Pie’s,’ I shouted.

I wasn’t the only one. At the end of my road I turned left and there was Fifty’s black curly hair bobbing along in front of me.

‘Where are you off to?’

‘Same place as you, I guess,’ said Fifty.

‘Great minds —’

‘Think alike.’

We did the fist of friendship. I was glad there were two of us. Failure didn’t seem so certain. And by the time we got to Copper Pie’s road there was one more. Bee was hanging around
on the corner.