A Summer To Remember (Seasons of Love & Lust Book 1) (4 page)

I couldn’t think straight and didn’t give a damn about the implications of my actions because I did pretty much everything on pure instinct. My lips searched for his and when they connected, it was magic from the moment it began.

My face heated up and I knew I was a deep crimson but I didn’t care. I kissed him, hard. He eventually responded as soon as the surprised look on his face ended and when his tongue sought mine out, I opened my mouth to him. It struck me as ironic I hadn’t been this intimate with another man or allowed anyone to see the real me since Kevin.

This wasn’t a mere kiss of passion and longing; this was over fourteen years of pent up longing and aggression which had forced its way to the surface. I had liked him as more than a friend since I was ten and he was going on fourteen. I didn’t even know what hormones were at that age but I knew something about him made me feel all gooey and relaxed inside. He eased away my pain like no other and although it was wrong and there was a perfect young woman named Ashley out there he belonged to, for that one hot moment, he was mine, and we both felt it with every fiber of our beings.

I pulled away reluctantly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. You’re too good of a man and a human being to confess to cheating—emotionally or otherwise—with someone else. Especially
me
.”

“And what is so wrong with you I should be ashamed we went with the moment, Jerrica? I love you. I have known you practically my whole life and we’re like family.”

Yes, and that kiss we just shared was such a friendly kind of love,
I thought sarcastically.

“I’m damaged goods, Paul. Inside, everything is broken and my emotions are like shattered glass. I’m not good for any man, especially one as worthy as you.” I took his hand and we turned toward the house. “We won’t speak of this again and we won’t tell anyone it ever happened, okay?”

“Fine. What happened tonight will be our little secret.”

I breathed a deep sigh of relief and whispered, “Thank you.”

I knew what had happened tonight would remain between us and he would never share it with a soul, not even my brother. That gave me a certain sense of comfort even if what we did was so right it was wrong.

Chapter Four

The next morning, I awoke early, showered, and walked out to the pool area. Unfortunately, I hadn’t beat the early bird, Talia, who already lay out in a pristine white bathing suit that accentuated her voluptuous curves and looked stunning on her light olive skin which was already beginning to bronze.

“Jesus, how long have you been up?” I asked as I lay in the lounger beside her and sprayed my skin with sunscreen.

“Good morning to you too,” Talia responded cordially. “I am having a bit of a time adjusting to the new time zone after being on Pacific Standard Time for so long. I awoke about five and read a bit before I took a shower and made some fresh-squeezed orange juice. You look like you need it. Feeling a bit hungover?”

I picked up the carafe on the glass table between us and poured myself a generous helping in a Baccarat crystal glass. “Is it that obvious I had too much to drink last night? This isn’t spiked with vodka, is it?”

My best friend looked at me like I’d just asked her for a hit of crack cocaine. “Of course not! I have been in California a bit too long. I made myself a smoothie for breakfast and then made the orange juice. I don’t do any of that shit anymore. No marijuana and definitely no ciggies. I quit cold turkey because all my bad habits were starting to affect my voice and make it a little too husky.”

“Husky is good. Think about all the great British neo-soul singers: Adele, Joss Stone, the late, great Amy Winehouse.” I finished spraying myself and set the sunscreen on the table then swallowed half my orange juice in a few deep swigs.

“I don’t do neo-soul. I do pop, remember? I’m trying to make it and I don’t want to be in a certain niche that doesn’t sell well. I want to be a Mariah Carey or a Britney Spears.”

“With better pipes? How are you ever going to make it if you keep writing songs for established artists and the company you work for would rather use you as a song writer rather than an artist? I told you it was going to be a hard slog but you ignored me. Making it as a singer-songwriter is no joke. There is a reason why there are so few.”

Talia breathed deeply before she turned my way. “What was last night all about and you running off like your ass was on fire? Don’t you dare tell me it had anything to do with Paul or I will kill you myself.”

I thought about it for a moment. Part of my behavior did have to do with Paul but the other part was all me. I didn’t want to hear about his perfect girlfriend or how they were so great together. I didn’t feel like explaining any of this to my best friend either so I just took the easy way out. I lied my ass off.

“I don’t give a damn about who Paul is dating, and listening to Jude and him go on and on about Ashley made me want to vomit. It’s bad enough I will have to meet her…eventually.”

“True…” Talia trailed off when we heard a ruckus at the front door. She rolled her eyes and we both had the same thought. It wasn’t hard to guess what the issue was about. Another one of our best friends had arrived and she didn’t sound happy.

We walked through the house and I opened the double doors. There was a stretch limousine parked out front, and Autumn stood outside the vehicle arguing with the driver.

“I didn’t pay you just to look pretty and drive me here. It is your contractual obligation to help me with my bags so get your lazy,
fat
ass out of the car and do your goddamn job!” she exclaimed in an icy tone.

“Lady, I am already late for my next appoint—”

“It’s
Ms
. Jensen to you,” Autumn interrupted, “and how is it my fault you booked two appointments too close together? I want help with my luggage or you will not receive an
adequate
tip!”

Paul and Jude walked out the front door and began to unload all of Autumn’s bags while she continued to argue with the driver at a decibel higher than normal.

“Hey!” I said. “It’s been taken care of by our two resident men in charge. Why don’t you just sign off on the limo and let him be on his way?”

Autumn turned my way and her luminous gray-green eyes were bright with spunk and rage. “It’s the
principle
, Jerrica. You don’t think I am tired and this hasn’t been a long trip for me? I am just trying to stress to this…this
person
, how important customer service is. Frankly, he sucks at it!”

Talia was the only one who could handle Autumn’s temper and she walked over to her and slid an arm around her waist. “The situation has been defused and your bags are safe inside. Just pay the man so he can be on his way.”

Still angry, Autumn signed the slip and true to her word, gave the driver a five percent tip instead of her usual twenty percent. “You don’t deserve that but my parents didn’t raise me to be rude to people like you who are not of my social status. Have a nice day.”

We all walked back inside and before the door closed all the way, Autumn’s iPhone began to blow up with text messages.

“By the way,” she said, “Savannah is delayed. She has an important client she has to take care of this morning so she’ll be in sometime this afternoon.” Autumn pressed the phone to her ear as her ringtone—“American Retards” by Winter’s Regret—went off and she answered it.

Paul and Jude set her bags in the room next to Talia’s. She told us she was going upstairs as she continued to chat on the phone.

“What are you doing here? Didn’t you go back to your parents’ house last night?” I asked Paul rather rudely, yet I couldn’t help myself.

Part of me was pissed at myself for allowing the kiss to happen at all, yet another side of me was completely and utterly jealous of the perfect Ashley who would probably end up his wife and the future Mrs. Paul Branson.

He looked a bit sheepish. “I had a bit too much to drink and slept in the room Savannah will be using. Monique has already instructed a maid to change the sheets so I will be out of your hair soon enough.”

Talia stared from him to me and back again. “Your parents’ house is next door. You were too drunk to stumble over there in the middle of the night?”

“It was my fault,” Jude said. “I suggested he stay here since all of the guests haven’t arrived, okay? We’re only staying the weekend and then we have to head back to the Sunday afternoon because we both have work on Monday.”

I tried to smile but it fell short. A whole goddamn weekend with Paul in my vicinity and me feeling the way I did about him? What was I going to do?

***

Savannah arrived shortly after four in the afternoon.

We’d already had a light lunch served by the resident chef and everyone was well on their way and firmly into cocktail hour. I was on my second Belvedere and Perrier, although I was trying to pace myself. Wearing a wide-brimmed hat, Autumn was enjoying a dirty martini in the shade of the pool area. Of the four of us, she couldn’t tan well and she would rather keep her creamy complexion than burn.

Talia and the guys were drinking imported and domestic beers, though their tastes went from the mundane—Beck’s, Carlsberg and Heineken—to the downright eclectic—homegrown lagers from the Brooklyn Brewery.

I tried to keep Autumn company though she didn’t make it easy since she received a constant string of calls.

Savannah arrived with her dark brown hair frosted with lighter brownish-blonde highlights in a bun. Her cerulean blue eyes were her best asset, but they were covered by a pair of blacker-than-black Ray-Bans and she looked casual and comfortable in white jeans and a black tank top. Her beautiful skin, naturally golden, sparkled in the sunshine and she smiled brilliantly.

“I am so sorry I’m late. I had this impossibly wealthy client who needed to be outfitted for her upcoming cruise to Spain and it was a godawful mess!” I hugged her then held her at arms’ length and looked her up and down. “You look beautiful and I have missed you so much. Don’t you think it is a bit ridiculous we live in the same city and never see each other?”

Savannah, always the pragmatic one, shrugged. “Not really. We both own businesses and if we want them to flourish the first few years are the most important. I already hear so much about your gallery and I need to catch up. Yes, I have a small, wealthy clientele but it is barely enough for me to afford the whole Manhattan lifestyle. I need to do better, and that means working my ever loving ass off.”

She tilted my chin and smiled. “We all couldn’t be born with golden spoons and rich brothers who know how to play the stock market. Not that I grew up poor or anything, but my parents certainly didn’t leave me with a trust fund either.”

I helped her with the few bags she brought and showed her to the suite that would be hers for as long as she wanted it. “It’s clean, but Paul got too drunk last night and stayed here at the house.”

She set her bags down and took her sunglasses from her face. “You still carrying a torch for him after all this time? You only mentioned him and your face went beet red.”

I slid several stray strands of hair behind my left ear. “That isn’t true. I don’t do relationships anymore, remember?”

Savannah studied me coolly. “We both know that is a lie. You don’t have a relationship with Kevin any longer, and that is certainly a good thing. Are you seriously going to tell me you have cut yourself off from
all
men and you would never do another relationship ever again?”

“I didn’t say forever…but not right now. The pain is still too fresh.”

Jude strolled into the suite and handed Savannah a Heineken. She smiled shyly, thanking him. “I didn’t realize you remembered.”

“One of my sister’s best friends’ favorite drink?”

Her happy expression fell slightly. “Of course you would. Thanks, Jude.”

“Any time,” he replied. He started to walk away but it didn’t stop him from turning and checking out Savannah again.

“Well, someone is red as fire but it sure as hell isn’t me,” I murmured, swigging from my Belvedere and Perrier.

She pulled her strappy sandals off and sat down on the bed, taking a swig of her lager. “Please. Talia and Autumn are much more gorgeous than I am…Jude isn’t looking at me like that. He’s too hot and he can have any woman he wants. Why would he settle for a hamburger when he can have the finest slice of filet mignon?”

“Jude has never been that vain and he has dated some interesting women in his time.” I set my drink down and laid down next to Savannah. “Remember Greta, the German exchange student?”

We both laughed. “Oh wow…I almost forgot about that,” Talia said. “She was a sweet young woman but she was just—”

“So plain, you looked like a superstar next to her. Jude isn’t nearly as shallow as he comes off. He’s a very complex human being. I should know, we grew up in the same household together.”

Savannah looked down at her iPhone. “So, what is on the agenda tonight? A party on the beach?”

“Paul suggested the Beach Bar. He’s driving since he’s the most sober of us all and we’ll all just pile into my dad’s Hummer.”

She checked her phone again out of nervousness. “I don’t know if I brought any party clothes.”

“It’s a bar, Savannah, not the freakin’ hottest club in Manhattan. If you really are that hard up, you can borrow something from me. Come on, let’s go up to my room and see what we can find.”

We walked to my suite together. I couldn’t help but wear a huge smile because all my friends and I were under the same roof again and I knew we would have a great time and plenty of memories to take us through the rest of our twenties.

Life was so fleeting and times like this, simply taking a stroll through my family’s summer home in the Hamptons, took my mind off Kevin and what happened at Vassar. It also erased that huge hole in my heart. I was still loveable and there was someone out there for me.

That made my heart beat a bit quicker even if the only person I was lying to was myself.