A Roux of Revenge (11 page)

“What I can remember now is stumbling out to the road. A car pulled up. College kids. They offered me a ride and asked me where I was going. They must have thought I was hitchhiking. I wasn’t in my right mind, and I’m sure they thought I was sick or stoned
or something, but at least they were kind enough not to leave me in the road. They were heading for Bennington, and they asked me where I was going. I told them I’d had a fight with my boyfriend and my name was Miriam. I just made that name up on the spot. I was afraid if I told them my real name, it would sound strange to them and they would know who and what I was. I told them I wanted to get
home to Lincoln Falls. It was the only town I knew the name of. There were three boys and two girls. They looked at me strangely, but they bought me food and promised to take me to my home.” Miriam laughed. “Home. What a joke that was, but I knew it was safer to tell them a lie.”

“What happened then?”

“I was very lucky. We stopped for gas in the town. I told them I could walk from there.
I was stronger by then. I’m not sure they believed me, but they didn’t argue, and we said good-bye. I owed them my life I guess. When I think what might have happened to me all alone out there . . .” Miriam trailed off.

“I wandered around Lincoln Falls for several days. I was hungry again. I had no money, of course, and I looked like a street urchin. One night I waited in the bushes behind
a restaurant. The cooks who worked there were tossing food away in the garbage can. I was so desperate. I waited until I was sure no one was in the parking lot and went to the bin. I opened the lid.” Miriam looked up. “I’m sure you’re horrified to hear this. That someone could stoop so low as to eat garbage from a restaurant. But I was starving, literally. Just as I reached for a discarded chicken
leg, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I almost jumped out of my skin and tried to run away, but this man had grasped my arm. He told me not to be frightened. He had no intention of hurting me.” Miriam pressed her lips together in an effort to stem the tears. “He . . . he had a bundle of food from the restaurant that he was taking with him. He asked me if I wanted his food. All I could do was nod. Something
in his voice made me trust him. He told me again not to be frightened, but I should sit in his car to eat. If I was afraid, I could leave the door open. He told me again he wouldn’t hurt me or even touch me. I knew he was telling the truth. That man, that wonderful kind man, was Doug Leonard, my husband. May the heavens keep him and bless him.”

Lucky reached across the table and squeezed Miriam’s
hand. Tears had sprung to her eyes.

“He told me he lived in Snowflake with his elderly mother whom he cared for, and the house had an extra bedroom off the kitchen. He said if I didn’t have a safe place to stay, I should come home with him. I was freezing and decided to try it for one night.” Miriam looked out the window, remembering. “One night, that’s what I thought then . . .” She laughed
a little at herself. “That was the beginning of my real life. Doug was a good ten years older than I. He worked in sales and sometimes had to travel. He had been paying for home care for his mother when he couldn’t be there, so he offered me a job. I could keep the room as my own.” Miriam smiled at the memory. “I’ll never forget that. It was a beautiful room with lovely wallpaper, flowers all over
the walls, and expensive sheets and pillows, a bureau and everything. In exchange, I took care of the housework and the meals. His mother, my future mother-in-law, was a very sweet lady. She was barely ambulatory, but she was no problem. I took care of bathing her and of her laundry and meals and medications. She was very bright. Age hadn’t dimmed her mentally. Millie taught me to read. At least
enough to get by at first and then later, I could teach myself a lot, simply by reading. I was afraid to go into town, to buy groceries and things, for a long time. I was afraid my family would be looking for me, and I knew I couldn’t return to them. I couldn’t marry someone I didn’t love, someone my father had chosen, and if the man I loved had abandoned me, then there was nothing for me there.

“Doug always picked up groceries, and eventually, after a long time, I wasn’t too frightened to leave the house. It was an odd arrangement, but it saved my life, and they were both such good, loving people. I was very blessed.

“It didn’t take Millie Leonard long to realize who and what I was. I had been hungry for so many days before Doug found me that at first I didn’t realize something
wasn’t right. It was Millie, Doug’s mother, who knew when she saw the changes.”

“Knew what?” Lucky asked.

“That I was pregnant. Here I was, the same age Janie is now, and I was about to become a mother.

“When Doug found out about the baby coming, he asked me to marry him. He promised to somehow get me a birth certificate to legitimize my identity. He said that once we were married,
no one would be asking questions, no one need ever know, unless I wanted them to. I was so very grateful.” Miriam wiped her eyes on the dish towel. “So . . . you can guess the rest. We were married in a civil ceremony in Bennington. We thought that would be safer, and we made up a past history for me to tell when people asked questions about how we met. Once Janie was born, life went on as usual.
Janie had just turned three when Doug’s mother died. I consider Millie my real mother. I barely remember my true mother. And I’m sure my father is dead now. I had a dream one night in which he came to me to ask me to forgive him. I woke with a start, and I knew then. I knew he was dead. I cried the rest of the night. For him, for me, for Eamon, for all of us.”

Lucky spoke softly. “You’re a
remarkable woman, Miriam. I have nothing but admiration for you. And I think when Janie knows the whole story, she’ll feel differently.”

“When Janie told me someone had been watching her, I was terrified. The people who would have controlled my life are all gone by now, I’m sure, but my childhood fears came rushing back. I know I didn’t handle it very well when I questioned Janie at first.
And now, I’m sure Eamon really is here. I’ve been overwhelmed with feelings. I hardly know how to make sense of things. Complete terror they will try to pull me back, rage that Eamon abandoned me, that he left me to starve and die. What if those college kids hadn’t found me on the road? What if it hadn’t been Doug Leonard who found me behind that restaurant? Part of me has always been afraid my clan
would travel through here. When I first learned about the Stones near Snowflake, I realized that could be a possibility.”

“The Stones? Why?”

“My clan has a belief about the Stones—that they are very ancient. That they were constructed by our ancestors thousands of years ago.”

“I always thought the Stones were old Indian dwellings. Didn’t people believe the original colonists used them
as root cellars?”

“They’re not. I don’t know what the archeologists would say today, but the people of our clan believe they were constructed by our long-ago ancestors. Not just the structure here in Snowflake, but the ones all over New England and other places in the country too. It’s a pilgrimage for them to return every few years to the spots they consider sacred. The experts really haven’t
agreed, although I know there are a lot of theories. Bear in mind, I had never seen a map. So I didn’t connect the Stones and Snowflake when I first came here. But that must be why they’re traveling through this area now. And work at the Harvest Festival probably brought them to town. I can’t face any of them. It’s fear, embarrassment, shame, all those things. I’ve spent my life being terrified
of being found out in this world and found by the old world.”

“Miriam, you have nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to be afraid of. They can’t hurt you now. They can’t spirit you away. You should be proud of yourself. You made your choices. You built a good life. You have a beautiful daughter who loves you. Never forget that.”

“But will she ever forgive me?” Miriam said. “In my mind,
I’ve confessed the truth to her a million times. It was Doug who wanted to be honest with her when she was younger. But I held him back. I always planned to tell Janie the truth one day. When I imagined doing so, it never looked like this.

“I really appreciate that you’re taking care of Janie right now. I’m not happy about how this all came to light, but at least I know she’s in a safe place.”

“She is safe. And I plan to talk to her some more. She will come around; I’m sure of it.”

• • •

“I
COULD TELL
the minute you walked in the door that you had been talking to my mother.” Janie’s tone was more resigned than accusatory. Lucky sat next to her on a stool at the counter. The morning rush had ended, and only a few straggling customers remained in their seats.

“Yes, I did
talk to her.”

“Did she come to the apartment?” Janie’s voice held a hint of sarcasm.

Lucky was losing patience trying to break through Janie’s walls. “No, she didn’t come to the apartment,” Lucky replied. “I went to see her.”

Janie looked up quickly. “Why?” she cried. “Why would you do that?”

Lucky needed to put an end to the “us against Mom” attitude. “Because you’re just eighteen.
Because you can’t support yourself. Because she’s your mother. Because she loves you. Because you’re all she has in the world. How’s that for starters?”

Janie’s anger melted a bit. At least she had the good grace to look embarrassed. “It’s like . . . I feel like I’m turning my back on my dad. Like I’m not being loyal to him. Can’t you understand how I feel, Lucky?”

“Yes, I can, Janie.
I mean I can’t totally imagine how I’d feel if I found out my dad wasn’t my biological father. But the man who raised you was your father in every sense of the word. And you know who your mother is. You know she loves you and she did everything she possibly could for you. You have to talk to her. You need to hear the whole story, how her life came to be. Do you have a right to be angry? Okay, maybe
you do. But you need to talk to her, to give her a chance to explain why she did what she did. I think you’d feel differently if you heard everything.”

Janie didn’t respond. She stuck a spoon into her mug of cocoa and swirled the creamy topping around until it dissipated. “My whole life has been a lie, Lucky. I loved my father. He was the greatest guy in the world. When he died, I wanted to
die too. But now I’m sure he must have lied to me, just like her. How could he have done that all those years? If you love someone, how can you look them in the face and
lie
to them?”

Chapter 16

N
ATE SPUN A
pencil around on his desktop. Soothing music, undoubtedly designed to calm nervous claimants, emanated from the receiver balanced on his shoulder. To his relief, the music stopped
and a pleasant female voice spoke, professional and distant.

“This is Amy Thorsen. How may I help you?”

Nate identified himself and the reason for his call.

“We’re happy to be of help. Can you tell me what this is in regard to?”

“Uh . . .” Nate thought quickly. “It’s nothing serious. Just a background check. We have a situation here in our town that might be related to a case a
Mr. Joseph Conrad once worked on. He gave Union Fidelity as a reference, as a former employer.”

“That’s right. Mr. Conrad was one of our investigators. But he retired several years ago.”

“I see. And were you his supervisor at that time?”

“No. Unfortunately, I did not know Mr. Conrad personally. I transferred here from another location. But I do know he had an outstanding record prior
to his retirement.”

“Is there anyone with your company at the present time who actually worked with him?”

Ms. Thorsen was silent for a moment. “I believe so. Perhaps I can have one of his colleagues call you back. Can you give me your full name and position again, and I’ll ask him to call you right away.”

“That would be great. I’d appreciate speaking to anyone who actually worked with
Mr. Conrad. Thanks.”

“You realize, of course, we can’t divulge any personal information. Not without a subpoena. That would be against the law and against company policy.”

“I understand completely. Just like to get a feel for the man.” Nate recited his cell phone number. He’d rather not make Bradley aware of his call.

“Fine. I’ll have Mr. Isaac Brewer call you back.”

“Thanks.”

Nate hung up the phone and waited. The photocopy of Joe Conrad’s license lay on the desktop in front of him. He wasn’t quite sure why he wanted to talk to one of Conrad’s coworkers at the insurance company. Was it because he found it hard to believe the man could still be obsessed with an old case he hadn’t successfully seen to completion? But then, maybe investigators were just like cops.
Couldn’t let a thing go until it was neatly sorted. The driver’s license was in order; the home address checked out. There were no outstanding warrants on the man, but all the same Nate knew he’d feel better if he talked to somebody who actually knew Joe when.

His cell phone finally rang. “Thanks for calling me back. I won’t take much of your time. Just wanted to speak to someone who worked
with Joseph Conrad.”