A Rose In Flanders Fields (24 page)

‘Then she must stay here. Or rather, not here, but with Ma. She can have my old bed, and live there until everything is resolved. Perhaps you could give Ma something to help pay for her keep? I’d like to help, but –’

‘Of course I will!’ I gave a sigh of deep gratitude. ‘Don’t worry, your mother won’t be out of pocket by a penny. But what on earth will she think?’

‘She’ll be delighted, and so will Emily – I think she’s been lonely since the twins have decided she’s simply not worth bothering with any more. You know, being a sister and all.’

I took a deep breath. ‘I can’t tell Oliver myself, it’s better if it comes from a friend.’

‘Right. You go and find Archie, I’ll make sure Kitty is all right.’

‘Do you think it’s possible it
might
simply be left-over sea-sickness?’ But the hope died as soon as the words were out of my mouth.

‘No,’ Lizzy said gently, ‘and neither do you.’

I crossed the yard accompanied by one of the farm dogs, who’d just been set free from having his paw bandaged by Jane and was eager to adopt a less bossy companion. I absently scratched his ears and looked around for Archie, and found him checking the car.

‘That rough track didn’t cause too much damage, I hope?’

‘The track would have been fine,’ he said, looking up with a grin, as if last night’s encounter had happened to two different people, ‘it’s the driver who could do with taking a wee bit more care.’

‘You didn’t have to let me drive the last part of the way,’ I pointed out, relieved to have this familiar banter to delay the inevitable. ‘I’m used to urgency, remember?’

‘Aye, and this car might look very pretty, but the ambulances are far more suited to that kind of driving. I think she’sOK,’ he said, giving the nearest tyre an experimental kick. ‘Take her easy on the way back up.’

‘No fear, you can drive this time, it’s nice to have a break.’ I looked back at the house, wondering how Lizzy was getting along with Kitty. ‘Can I talk to you?’

‘Always,’ he said, and I could see a flicker of something in his eyes that I knew I must quash.

‘I haven’t changed my mind, you do know that?’

‘I do,’ he said, and smiled. ‘But after that kiss you can’t blame a bloke for hoping.’

I resisted the instinct to touch his arm. ‘You’re a dear friend, Archie.’

‘Aye, well it’s easy to be a good friend to someone like you, Miss Evangelastica,’ he said, and I found a smile for the humour I was about to wipe out. He wiped his hands on a rag and tucked it back into his belt. ‘What was it you wanted to talk about?’

‘Not out here,’ I said. ‘Come into the barn a moment.’

We faced each other in the gloom, and I was glad couldn’t see his face properly. I bent to pet the dog again, just to give me time to think of how to start, but eventually I just blurted it out.

‘Kitty was attacked.’

‘God!’ From the corner of my eye I saw his whole body jerk in shock. ‘Who? And when?’’

‘The night I went to see Will. She was driving alone, and there was a man in the road. A soldier. She thought he needed help.’ I battled with the words, and whether or not I had the right to say them. ‘I think she’s pregnant.’ I said it very slowly, and now my eyes had adjusted to the lack of light I looked at him directly.

He went pale and swallowed hard. ‘Oh, sweet Jesus.’ His voice was taut with a mixture of anger and sorrow. ‘Poor little Kittlington.’ Then he turned on me. ‘Why are you only just telling me this now?’

‘She made me promise not to. I owed her that much since it’s all my fault, leaving her like that. I swore I wouldn’t say anything, but now I have to.’

‘You haven’t said who.’

‘I can’t, not yet. Not even to you. It has to come from her, but I have a suspicion.’

‘And she’s told you this? That’s she’s pregnant?’

‘She doesn’t know herself, I don’t think,’ I said, ‘And I don’t know for sure either, but Lizzy and I have been talking about it, and we think perhaps that’s why she was sick on the boat. She’s never suffered from sea-sickness before.’

He looked wretched. ‘Aye, you’re right, she hasn’t. And that would make some kind of sense.’

‘She was ill again this morning.’ Now I did touch his arm, and it was like iron beneath his jacket-sleeve. ‘Archie, I know you’ve got that poor boy to think about, but I just didn’t know who to turn to, or what to do.’

‘You did the right thing,’ he said, but I could tell he was still struggling with the enormity of the news. ‘But you mustn’t tell Oliver, whatever you do.’

‘Actually I was hoping you would tell him.’

‘God no, Evie, we mustn’t! Especially since you don’t know for certain. He’s a wee hot-head at times, and he’s enough on his plate just now, don’t you think?’

I reluctantly decided he was right; Oliver wasn’t the seasoned soldier Archie was, he was still coming to terms with his position in his company and, after all, we were only surmising and might be wrong. Part of me still fervently wished I hadn’t said anything, but a bigger part was swamped in relief that I had done so. ‘I knew I could trust you,’ I said. ‘You’re very like your uncle, do you know that?’

‘Aye, so my mother says. There are worse people to take after, so I gather. I don’t know him that well myself.’

‘He’s an absolute diamond.’ Then I remembered how much trouble those particular stones could cause, and gave a rueful smile. ‘Or rather, a big lump of solid gold.’

‘Then I’ll accept the compliment.’ He blew out a breath, lifting the hair from his forehead. He had clearly been badly knocked by the news, but of course he had known Kitty since they’d been children; she was like a sister to him.

He held out his arms. ‘I’m sorry for snapping at you, sweetheart. How about a hug? No strings, I know how the land lies. But you look as if you could do with one.’

His understanding almost undid all my composure, and while I moved into his innocent embrace all I could think about was how badly I wished it was Will’s familiar arms that held me, and his voice I could hear. I was aware of a shadow flickering by the door but paid it no heed. If I had, perhaps I could have avoided the nasty atmosphere that dogged my departure from Dark River Farm.

Chapter Fourteen

‘You’re wrong!’ Kitty glared from one of us to the other. ‘I’d know, wouldn’t I?’

Lizzy and I exchanged a look over the younger girl’s head, but she stayed quiet; this had to be my task.

‘Perhaps if you just stayed here for a little while,’ I said, ‘just until we know for certain?’

‘Here at the farm?’

‘No, Lizzy has suggested you may stay at her mother’s home, which she says is just a short distance away. That way you’d be close enough to visit, you’d be in the fresh air, and this sickness…’ I hesitated and glanced at Lizzy again, ‘
whatever
it turns out to be, might just go away.’

‘But you don’t think it will,’ Kitty said in a dull voice.

‘I don’t know,’ I said truthfully. ‘I hope I’m wrong, I truly do. Then in a month or so, if you still want to, you can come back to Flanders and show me how good you are at this night-driving malarkey.’ My tone was light, but Kitty gave me a look of mistrust that hurt a great deal.

‘And if you’re right? What then?’

‘Then, I suppose, the choice is yours. Whether you tell your family, or prefer to stay in Devon. If you don’t want to tell them you’re here, I can…’ I hesitated, wondering at the morality of what I was suggesting, then ploughed on regardless, ‘I can write to your family on your behalf, tell them how well you’re doing, and, if you want to, you, can write to them through me and I’ll put your notes in the post from Belgium. Any replies can be posted to you here.’

Kitty remained quiet for a long while, and Lizzy moved carefully around our room, straightening things, waiting patiently for her role in the conversation. At last the girl fetched a deep sigh. It shook on the way out, and the sound seemed to frighten her. She looked at Lizzy.

‘Are you sure your mother wouldn’t mind? Not even if it turns out…’ She trailed away, and Lizzy sat down again.

‘Not even if,’ she said. ‘My sister is around your age, she’s a sweetheart, and I know she would be pleased to help you. Ma is the kindest soul you’ll ever meet, and my brothers will drive you absolutely mad within ten minutes.’ She smiled and took Kitty’s other hand. ‘I’ll be less than an hour’s walk away, and you may come here as often as you like.’

‘I don’t mind helping out, for no pay I mean,’ Kitty said, and for the first time since I had broached the subject, there was a kind of weary acceptance in her voice.

‘I’ll take you up on that,’ Lizzy said, and hugged her. ‘I’ll ask Mrs Adams for leave to visit home this afternoon. You can come with me and meet everyone.’

She left Kitty and me alone, and I picked up the small bag I had brought in from the car.

Kitty looked up at me, her face pale. ‘What will you tell Oliver? I mean, you’re quite likely to see him before I get back.’

So she was still half-convinced she would be coming back. She might turn out to be right after all. Hope wasn’t hers alone, we could all share in that, but it would upset her terribly to know I’d talked to Archie about this already, before speaking to her.

I felt my face heat up as I prepared to lie, and turned away to hide it. ‘I should think it would buck him up no end to think you’re safely back in Blighty,’ I said. ‘It might be best to just tell him you were feeling a little unwell after a rough crossing, and that we thought the fresh country air would help.’

‘Apart from the smell,’ she echoed Archie, and I couldn’t help but smile.

‘Apart from that.’

As Archie and I prepared to leave, the tension in the little group grew. It had finally sunk in with Kitty that she was being left behind with strangers, as nice as they were. Lizzy made a huge effort to put the girl at her ease, but the sight of our bags by the door kept drawing Kitty’s eyes, as if she expected to see her own among them.

I thanked Mrs Adams, and the two land girls who had joined us, for their hospitality and kindness, and embraced Kitty. She clung to me and I could feel her chest hitching as she tried not to cry. Reluctantly, I let her go and turned to take my leave of my dearest friend. ‘Goodbye, Just Lizzy,’ I whispered.

She pulled me close, eyes glittering.‘Goodbye, Evie. Give my love to that gorgeous young man of yours.’ I didn’t dare look at Archie when she said that, but I’m certain she intended for him to hear; a not-so gentle reminder, in typical Lizzy fashion.

Archie then said his farewells, and just as we turned to go the third Land Army girl, easily the most vivacious of the three, came in and went straight over to hug him.

‘Goodbye, you brave darling,’ she said, and turned to me. ‘And goodbye to you, you lucky thing. Look after him.’

‘Lucky?’ Kitty asked, her tone sharpening.

‘I’ll say! These two are going to have a lovely time going off to the smoke together. No more hiding in smelly old barns, eh?’

‘What do you mean?’ I said, but I felt my face heat up again.

‘I saw you, naughty!’ she laughed, and winked. There was no malice in it, but I didn’t need to glance at Kitty to know this was the worst possible thing she could have said.

She was having trouble speaking, but managed, ‘In the barn?’

‘Oh, it was just a friendly hug,’ the girl said quickly, catching my expression.

‘And now they’re going off to London together,’ Kitty said dully.

Lizzy stepped in. ‘Evie isn’t going to London,’ she reminded her. But it made no difference. Kitty looked from me to Archie, and from Archie through the window to the waiting car, and her face was flushed with anger.

‘That’s why you’re doing this,’ she said. ‘You made up that whole silly story, just so I would stay here and you could go off with him!’ She realised what she was saying, and went redder still.

Archie took a step towards her. ‘Kittlington, don’t –’

‘Don’t call me that!’ She pushed him away and pulled open the door. ‘Don’t you dare go without me!’ she shouted over her shoulder, and we heard her thundering up the stairs to collect her own bag.

The land girl stood open-mouthed. ‘What “silly story” is she talking about?’ She looked quite stricken, and although it wasn’t her fault I couldn’t help being cross and, worse, I couldn’t think of a single thing that would sound plausible.

Thank God then, for Lizzy. ‘We told her Ma needed help looking after the boys,’ she said, ‘but thanks to you she doesn’t believe me. Now where’s the help going to come from?’

‘Oh!’ The girl paled, she clearly liked Lizzy a great deal, and was mortified at having upset her. ‘I’m so sorry!’

I gave Lizzy a look of heartfelt gratitude. ‘Can’t be helped,’ I said briskly. ‘Archie, you’d better follow her, I think you might be the only person she’ll listen to now.’

A little while later Kitty was once more reconciled to staying with Lizzy’s mother, although still uncommunicative, and Archie and I started our journey up the rough track to the main road. Circumstances aside, I envied Kitty for staying behind; Lizzy was waving madly and I missed her already. I had imagined we’d have had time to talk, and I knew she ached to unburden herself about Jack to someone who not only knew him, and loved him, but who understood the danger he was in.

The way I’d left Kitty laid a veil of discontent and sadness over the rest of the trip, and when Archie dropped me at Guildford I was relieved to turn my mind to trains and tickets, and to be going back to what I knew. The risks, the loneliness and the noise would be more than compensated for by the fact that I’d be near Will again, and doing a bit of good instead of the havoc I seemed to be wreaking elsewhere. But as I posed by one of the new ambulances, smiling for the newspapers, I kept coming back to the fact that it was my selfishness that had led to Kitty’s terrible situation. Leaving her alone like that had been unforgiveable, and knowing she had gone on working afterwards only pushed the blade of guilt deeper now I had a fuller idea of what she had been through.

The crossing to France was rougher than the trip out, but I welcomed the unsettling sensation; it meant I could put the churning in my stomach down to the rocking motion and the zig-zagging passage of the ferry across the channel. But it persisted as we docked, and as I drove our new acquisition back up to our beloved little base, and what should have been a triumphant return, my thoughts remained in Devon and all I could wonder was: would Kitty ever forgive me?