A Little Harmless Obsession (21 page)

It was bad enough that he was there. One night. She asked for one night and he couldn’t give it to her.

Worse, it wasn’t so much as to have sex with her, but to feel her in bed sleeping next to him. It had been a little over a week since their first time together and he couldn’t survive one night without her. Worse, he didn’t have the balls to ask. Instead, he was sneaking down her hallway like a thief. Lord, if they could see him at Rough ’n Ready.

He reached her door and slowly turned the knob. As silently as he could, he slipped into her room and then shut the door behind him.

He could see her lying there, the moonlight washing over her skin. The flutter of breeze filtered through the room and the smell of plumeria filled his senses. All his recriminations dissolved the moment he saw her there, snuggled up to the pillow, her face relaxed. As quietly as possible, he shucked off his pants and shirt, joining her in bed without any clothes. As he slid onto the cool sheets, she turned to him, as she always did. God, he didn’t think he would ever get used to this, get used to how right it felt to have her head on his chest. He knew it would never last, couldn’t, but he would relish every night he could feel her just like this.

His muscles relaxed, his mind drifted, until he felt her move against him. One leg slid up his, flesh against flesh.

Okay, this was not going to be as easy as he thought it would be. She was warm, and …was that her lips he felt against his skin?

“May?” he whispered.

A giggle was his answer. He rolled her over, stretching out on top of her. Even in the darkened room he could see the mischievous glint in her eyes, the soft smile curving her lips.

“You should behave in your daddy’s house.”

Melissa Schroeder

She arched one eyebrow. “I wasn’t the one sneaking in during the middle of the night. What happened to letting me rest?”

He couldn’t think of a word to say. Mainly because at this moment, her whispered words, the intimacy of the moment sharing a secret struck him like a blow to the chest. The air backed up in his lungs and his mind whirled. Nothing had every felt this so very right, ever. There had never been a woman he would giggle in bed with, or one who could challenge him so much in and out of the bedroom.

“Evan?”

Damn, he was in love with her.

He couldn’t say it, couldn’t tie her to him that way. May didn’t understand why he could never allow himself to have kids, why he would never be able to give her a happily ever after. But he could give her now, in this moment, he wanted to show the way he felt about her.

“Evan, you’re scaring me. Are you all right?”

He smiled. “I’m not sure.”

Before she could ask him anything else, he bent his head and touched his lips to hers. With little licks and nips, he tasted her. This was a woman who could undo him with a look. At this moment, he wanted nothing more than to dissolve into her.

He cupped her face and deepened the kiss, dipping into her mouth to get a full taste.

With soft hands, he slid her top up and over her head. Her shorts soon followed, landing on the floor somewhere off to the side.

She didn’t protest, but he stopped, raising himself up to his elbows. It took her a moment to open her eyes. Passion and something else, something that was piercing his heart, mingled there.

“May?”

She said nothing for a moment, then, “Yes.”

That one word was like a lifeline. It warmed his chest, his blood, and he moved down her body, brushing his mouth over her flesh. He feasted on her breasts, his tongue first circling one, then his lips pulling it into his mouth. Her legs moved restlessly against the mattress, her fingers slipping through his hair. He looked up, noticed she was biting her lower lip, and smiled. His Maylea was a vocal lover, and it had to be killing her to keep from moaning her pleasure.

He continued his path down her body, enjoying the way her stomach quivered as he nipped and kissed it.

She laughed, the sound both charming and arousing, the moment he dipped his tongue into her belly button. The woman was a delight, one he was sure he would never get enough of. While he had always taken direct pleasure in her release, now he took what he wanted. He continued to kiss down her body, spreading her legs apart, opening her sex to him. God, her arousal fed his own. He dipped his finger into her core, happy at the way her muscles clung, aroused at how wet she was. It was amazing that with no D/s 122

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A Little Harmless Obsession

play and very little foreplay, she was so close to orgasm. He could feel her orgasm sitting there, shimmering on the edge.

He set his mouth against her pussy, enjoyed her quick intake of breath and muffled moan. The taste of her exploded across his tongue, drugged his senses. Each time he tasted her, he was amazed at just how delicious she could be. Her legs moved restlessly against his head, pounding on the mattress, and he continued to torment her. He wanted her as hot as when he controlled her every thought, her every need.

And he seemed to be doing it, without the play, without the need to lord it over her. It was as if she gave to him what he needed, a sub who understood that her pleasure was his to give. He slipped his tongue between her slit again, then up and over her plump clit. He could feel her muscles quiver, feel them brace for the onslaught of her orgasm. He pulled the nub between his teeth and sucked. A moment later, she came, her body convulsing. He lifted his head and watched her, the look of wonder, the complete satisfaction that took over her body. Wanting to see it again, he pressed his fingers into her and took her clit back into his mouth. She came again, a hard jolt traveling through her body so strong he was sure he could feel it moving through his. Now was the time, he thought. He needed to be in her, to push her up and over again, and experience that supreme feeling of completion with her. He quickly moved up her body, barely stopping to lick each of her nipples. He had the head of his cock pushing against her entranced when he cursed himself.

He hadn’t even thought of bringing a condom.

“May?”

She barely opened her eyes.

“I don’t have protection.”

“Have you been tested?”

He nodded.

“Clean?”

He nodded again.

“I’m on the pill.”

It was all he needed to plunge into her core. It was amazing just how hot and tight she was, the slick feel of her pussy lips gliding over his cock. They clung to him as he pulled almost all the way out and then thrust back in to the hilt. He grabbed her hips, pulling her off the bed as he rose to his knees, angling to move deeper. It took no more than three more thrusts and she was coming again. He muffled her cry of release by kissing her, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. She immediately started to suck, pull him deeper into her mouth as he plunged into her hot core.

Frenzied now, he sped up his thrusts, losing his mind to everything but completing his own orgasm.

She pulled her mouth away, and looked up at him. She trailed her fingers over his cheek, then cupped it.

“Evan. I love you.” She said it so tenderly he wasn’t sure he’d heard her, but he saw her lips move, understood what she’d said. Her eyes were so soft, so understanding, so accepting. With those three words,

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Melissa Schroeder

he lost it. One last deep thrust and he came, losing his seed inside of her. His orgasm seemed to last forever, his body shuddering as the last of it moved through him. He collapsed on top of her, and she immediately embraced him, her arms wrapping around him. He couldn’t seem to stop shivering as she brushed her lips over his temple.

“Sleep,” she whispered gently.

He obeyed the command, drifting off into a deep sleep.

The smell of sex jolted Evan first.
Fuck
was the only thing he could think. The whore had brought someone home. He had hoped she wouldn’t show up. What did it tell you about a woman when her nine-year-old son wanted nothing to do with her? Hell, he always prayed that some night, some john would kill her. Unfortunately, they never did. He’d slipped into the apartment and hoped to avoid her and whatever loser she’d brought home with her. They were always the same, sad men who couldn’t get laid without paying for it. His mother was trash, disgusting, but they paid her.

Silently, he moved across the living-room floor, the threadbare carpet barely muffling his movements.

He heard the door open, the squeak that always seem to freeze his thoughts, chill his blood. He couldn’t move. The coward in him stood there, afraid to look over. Oh, God, not tonight. Not fucking tonight. He couldn’t take another man’s hand on him.

“You finally made it home, you bastard.” The deep smoker’s voice his mother had developed lately was getting worse. The twenty-eight-year-old sounded at least fifty.

He said nothing, could think of nothing to say as she approached him.

“You have a job to do.”

Those few words caused terror to well up, his throat closing up as she grabbed his shirt sleeve. She dragged him and that wasn’t easy. He was skinny, but she was a fucking crackwhore who rarely ate anything but junk food. Still, he could do nothing, say nothing, because the truth was, it would make it worse.

“I owe him a lot of money, so don’t cause any problems.” She opened the door to her bedroom and shoved him inside, plunging him into darkness.

Evan bolted out of bed, his heart pounding against his chest, his body slick with sweat. Terror still held him by the balls.

“Evan?”

May’s soft voice felt like nails against a chalkboard. Jesus, he didn’t need her right now, to let her know the darkness he held at bay most days had returned to him tonight. It wasn’t any worse or better than the thousands of times he’d had the dream before, but it was somehow more difficult with this woman beside him.

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A Little Harmless Obsession

“It’s nothing, bad dream.”

She placed one of her small hands on his forearm and caressed him. Bile rose up in his throat. After having that dream, the memory of his mother still sharp on his mind, having her touch him shamed him…disgusted him.

“Are you sure you’re all right? I always feel better talking about it.”

“I can’t remember it. Go back to sleep.”

He immediately regretted his harsh tone. Her hand slipped away and she moved over to the other side of the bed. With a sigh, he shook off the dream, pushed aside the putrid memories and snuggled up to her.

“I’m sorry. It just jolted me and left me in a nasty mood.” She opened her arms to him, pulled him close and he felt the warmth of her affection surrounded him.

A soft comfort filled him, relaxed his muscles and he again drifted asleep. This time the dreams stayed away.

May lay there for a long time, her arms wrapped around him, her mind drawing conclusions her heart just did not want her to make.

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Chapter Seventeen

Sun peeked through the slit in the curtains as May watched Evan dress. She wasn’t sure what she was going to say, but she was going to confront this head on. This wasn’t the best time, in fact it was probably the worst. But she couldn’t wait. She knew something was wrong. The man she loved was holding things back from her. She had told him everything in her painful past, how she had come to realize she needed to be a sub. Evan…he had held back. Worse, after that dream last night, she was sure he was hiding even more from her.

“What was that dream about last night?”

He paused in pulling on his shirt, then tugged it all the way down. He glanced at her. “I told you it was nothing.”

“You said you didn’t remember. I don’t believe you.”

He didn’t look at her. “Let it alone, May.”

His cold tone stabbed her heart, but she forged ahead.

“You don’t tell me anything.”

This time he stared at her, the gentle lover from the night before gone.

“I said to let it alone. Why is this important?”

She drew her legs up to her chest, trying to warm herself. “I’m not even talking about the dream. I’m talking about you. You barely share anything with me.” He frowned at her. “Are we going to have a you-don’t-talk-to-me talk?” His glibness hurt, but she blinked back the tears. She didn’t want him to think she was a raving baby.

She had a right to know about him, know about how he became a Dom. She knew that if they had not become lovers, she would not have that right. But now that they were lovers, she felt he should tell her. He was cheating her by not sharing.

“No. What I mean is you asked me to share with you, to tell you about how I realized I was a sub.

You on the other hand brushed off my questions with a slick response.”

“I was being truthful.”

“I wish I could believe it.”

He said nothing for long moments. His only reaction to her statement was his jaw muscle working, telling her he was grinding his teeth.

“I don’t understand why it is so important to you.”

A Little Harmless Obsession

“I give you everything. I told you last night that I loved you. But you give me nothing in return.”

“Are you expecting me to tell you that I love you?”

She shook her head, sadness and anger almost choking her. “That is how pathetic I am, I don’t even expect that. But I do expect something else. You hold things back from me all the time.”

“Excuse me if I can’t pour out my soul in between giving you orgasms.” She flinched. “Well, I guess that put me in my place.” She slipped out of bed and pulled on her robe.

“May.” His voice had softened. “I don’t know what you want from me.” She turned and stared at him. “I want to know if you are in this for fun…or if you want more?” Something akin to panic washed over his face. “Is this an ultimatum?” She shook her head. “No. But I do need to know where we stand, to understand just what I should expect from you and this relationship.”

“I just thought…”

Apparently, he noticed her hard look and stopped short of saying it was all about sex. He could say it was all he wanted, she knew it wasn’t true.