A Life Less Ordinary (2 page)

You
have no idea how much I wish you were real.

In
a blink, he was gone – and the phone was ringing.  For a split second, Manny
considered not answering it.

There’s
your chance to talk to a real person,
Harvey murmured.

Probably
a telemarketer.

Probably
Rebecca.  Or Daisy.  They’ll worry if you don’t answer.

All
right, all right.

Manny
heaved herself to her feet and walked to the phone.

Maybe
I’m glad you’re imaginary after all.

She
caught a glimpse of his grin as she answered the phone.

It
was Rebecca, asking her to go out the next night.

“I
don’t know...” Manny sighed.

“Oh,
come on – you’ll have fun!  And seriously – you haven’t gone out with us in
months!”

“I’ve
been tired...”

“You’ve
been tired your whole life I think.  You need to break out of this rut you’re
in!  Come out for a few drinks and dancing with me and Daisy.  Who knows, maybe
you’ll meet a good-looking guy and be swept off your feet into a red-hot love
affair.”

Sounds
like a plan to me.

Yeah,
’cause
that’ll
happen.

“I’d
love to go dancing,” Manny said to Rebecca, “but the guy is just a figment of
your imagination.”

“Only
because you don’t put any effort into it.  Seriously, it’s not healthy to do
nothing but work and go home.  That’s how people go crazy you know.”

“Huh. 
You mean next thing you know I’ll be talking to my imaginary friend?”

Harvey
grinned wickedly and Manny abruptly turned her back to him.

“Exactly!”
Rebecca said. “Come on – what do you say?”

“Okay,
okay,” Manny sighed.  “Tomorrow night – the usual place?”

“Yep
– and sound like you’re actually looking forward to it, okay?”

“I’m
sorry.  I
am
looking forward to it – it’ll be fun.”

~~~~~

Manny
laid in bed, staring up at the ceiling and waiting for sleep.  She plucked
restlessly at the blanket and wished she could relax.  Tomorrow was Steph’s
first staff meeting.  Today she’d reacquainted herself with everyone in the
office then spent the rest of the day with Manny being briefed on the details
of the work of the branch and any current issues she’d need to resolve within
the next few days.  That meant Manny’s own work had been delayed, and tomorrow
it would be delayed again – and Manny would have to leave early in order to
meet Rebecca and Daisy at the lounge for drinks before heading to the club.

Manny
took a deep breath and slowly let it out.  It wouldn’t be too bad, she
staunchly told herself.  Steph was young, energetic, and had a shrewd
intelligence almost obscured by the cleavage-revealing shirts, short skirts and
a figure that could stop traffic – and probably did.  Manny wondered if Craig
truly understood what he’d gotten himself in for by promoting Steph rather than
Manny.

Cleavage
and legs.

She
mentally rolled her eyes at Harvey’s dry, cynical tones.

Maybe
– but that’s not really fair to him, is it?  He’s not a bad guy.

But
he is just a guy.

She
does bring a new perspective – a new way of thinking about things.  She’s not a
bad choice – and I can’t argue with Craig’s idea that shaking things up could
make things better.

And
where does that leave you?

No
worse off than I was before.

And
no better.

If
you’re not going to be helpful...

Harvey
glanced down at his suddenly ruffled shirt opened to the middle of his muscled
chest and skin-tight breeches.  He glanced back at her with a ruefully amused
smile.

Watched
the
Ice Pirates
again, did you?

Oh,
shut up – it’s a classic no matter what anybody else thinks!

I’m
just sayin’ - if I was real and regularly wore pants this tight, I’m not sure
I’d be of any use to you.  If you know what I mean.

Manny
groaned and shook her head, and Harvey blinked out of existence.  She wondered
when she’d managed to lose control of a figment of her imagination – one she’d
eventually felt compelled to name after an invisible rabbit.

She
groaned again, rolled over and pulled the covers over her head.  It was going
to be another long day tomorrow.

Complete
with dancing.

* * * * *

Manny
calmly considered Steph as she spoke to the staff in the boardroom.  Steph had
a short haircut that emphasized her high cheekbones and flawless skin.  She was
dressed to the hilt in a well-tailored suit that flattered her stunning
figure.  She was young, late twenties at most, Manny figured, and she was going
to go far.  Manny estimated she’d last two years in the new job and no more
than three.  There was no doubt in Manny’s mind that Steph would be running the
company by the time she was forty-five.

Manny’s
age.

Not
for the first time, Manny vaguely wondered where her own life was going.  With
a silent sigh, she refocused on Steph’s introductory pep talk.

“...and
I’m looking forward to working with all of you.”

Steph
beamed at everyone, and her smile didn’t waver even in the face of the awkward
silence that filled the room.  With a determined glint in her eyes, Steph
turned to Manny.

“And
I’m particularly looking forward to working with you, Manny,” she continued. 
“I know I’m going to learn so much from you.  Why, you’re practically an
institution around here!  You’ve been here forever; you know everything there
is to know about how this branch and the entire organization operates.  I mean,
you’ve been working here, in the same role, for fifteen years!  That’s amazing
– and shows us how dedicated you are, and how much you’re needed in your
position.  From what Craig told me, I don’t think we could function without
you!  And I know I speak for everyone in this organization, from the President
on down, when I say we look forward to having you with us, doing what you do,
for the next fifteen years!”

Oh. 
My. 
Fucking.
  God.

~~~~~

“And
that’s when I did it.”

Rebecca
and Daisy sat at the bar on either side of Manny as she sipped a beer.  They
were listening intently to her story of the staff meeting.

“Did...what?”
Rebecca asked cautiously.

“I
quit.”

“WHAT!”

Manny
winced at both the volume of the screech and the fact that it was in stereo,
directly in her ears.

She
shook her head.  “My God – another fifteen years?  I can’t even – not another
day!”

“You
didn’t just walk off the job, did you?” Daisy asked incredulously.

“I
offered two weeks’ notice.  Steph told me I could leave today.”  Manny
shrugged.  “So I did.”

“I
take it she wasn’t impressed,” Rebecca said drily.

“Hah! 
That’s putting it mildly!  On the other hand, I’m not sure she actually
cares
all that much.  It just looks really, really bad for somebody to quit on her
first full day on the job.  I think she just wanted to have the problem...well,
not solved, but out of sight as quickly as possible.”  Manny shrugged again. 
“In two weeks, it’ll be like I was never even there.”

Daisy
frowned at the trace of bitterness in Manny’s voice even as she asked, “So what
are you going to do now?”

“I’ve
already done it,” Manny replied calmly.

“What
have you done?” Daisy asked.

“I’m
cashing out my pension.  Rebecca, you can sell my house.  I’ve decided I’m
going to have a mid-life crisis, and by God, I’m going to have it like a man!”

“What
the hell - ?” Rebecca asked, at a loss.

“I’m
going on a road trip.  Hopefully with a young man in a hot red convertible –
but I’ll take whoever shows up.”

Daisy
stared at her, stunned.  All she could think to say was, “
Huh
?”

“I
put the personal ad online today,” Manny continued.

Manny
handed Daisy a slip of paper covered with her familiar scrawl.

Daisy
read it out loud for Rebecca’s benefit.  “
SWF, 45, having mid-life crisis,
seeks travelling companion with own money for six-month road trip to
destinations unknown.  Don’t worry – no sex wanted or offered.  Young men
preferred but really don’t give a damn.  You have a month to respond then I’m
leaving with or without you.  Hot red convertible will be considered an asset. 
ROSE!”

“Now
I know you’re pissed if you’re calling me Rose,” Manny said ruefully.

“I’m
your sister – I’ll call you whatever the hell I want!” Daisy snarled.

Rebecca
finally found her voice again.  “Have you lost your ever-loving mind?”

“No,”
Manny said seriously.  “I think I’ve finally found it.”

* * * * *

Zeke
shuffled into his living room wearing a t-shirt and boxers, a cup of coffee
lovingly cradled in his hands as if it was more precious than diamonds.  He
settled himself at his desk, took a sip and closed his eyes in bliss.  With a yawn,
he scratched at the stubble on his cheek then turned on his computer and logged
into his writer’s account at
What Women Want
.

Time
to check in on the reaction to his latest blog, he thought.  He was actually
rather proud of it; “In Praise of Older Women” had been a
tour de force
,
even if he did say so himself.  He settled in and had just begun to read the
comments when his cell phone rang.

“Yeah?”
Zeke answered, his New Zealand accent, as usual, more pronounced in the
morning.

“Have
you seen the comments on your latest blog?”

Zeke
leaned back in his chair with a fond smile.  “Good morning to you too, Leah. 
Yes, I slept well, and not alone – my date with Dixie went really great last
night, thanks for asking.”

On
the other end of the phone, Leah rolled her eyes in exasperation at her husband
TJ as she replied, “Whatever.  Take a look at the comments.”

“Yeah,
I’m starting to go through them now.”

TJ
leaned closer to the speakerphone and said, “Remember you live with Dixie –
your dates always end well.”

“That’s
what you think,” Zeke muttered to their amusement as he focused on the
comments.  He read avidly, occasionally snorting in exasperation or laughing or
scribbling a note about something he wanted to respond to later.

“Hey
– how’d it go yesterday?” Zeke asked as he worked.

“Embarrassing,”
TJ groaned.

“The
nurses were all impressed with you, though,” Leah said, a thread of humour in
her voice.  “They said that was the fastest they’d ever seen anyone fill up
that little cup.”

“Doesn’t
sound impressive to me!” Zeke laughed.

“Me
either,” TJ agreed wryly.  “They probably felt sorry for you, Leah – perhaps
I’m always that quick on the draw.”

Zeke
sputtered a laugh.  “So what were the results?”

“Nothing
so far,” Leah replied.  “We meet with the doctor in a couple of weeks, once my
tests come back.”

“Well,
I’m sure everything will be fine.  Sometimes it just takes a while to get
pregnant.”

TJ
and Leah exchanged a glance.  “Yeah, sometimes,” TJ agreed slowly.

“Some
pretty good battles going on this time on my blog, huh?” Zeke said, changing
the subject as he continued reading and making notes.  His voice was deadpan,
belying the huge grin on his face.

“Come
on, Zeke!” Leah said.  “We both know this is the most reaction you’ve ever
received!  I knew that blog was gonna be controversial, but
this
-”

“Surpasses
even your wildest hopes?”

“Yes!”

Zeke
continued scanning the comments as he said, “Which part do you think did it? 
My witty jabs at cougars?  My even wittier comments about the drones and
drudges?”

“Probably
both – and probably the fact that your ‘praise’ is anything but.  Especially
when you get into women’s mid-life crises.”

Zeke
shrugged even though Leah couldn’t see him.  “I call ’em like I see ’em.”

“I
know – it’s why I hired you and why I publish you even though you really
haven’t got a clue what women want.”

“That’s
not what Dixie told me last night.  Or this morning.”  Zeke’s voice was
unbearably smug and Leah rolled her eyes again.