A Harvest of Hope (32 page)

“Ja, but it was swelling, and I was trying to stop the bleeding. Maybe it was a bit soft, but I wasn't sure.” Astrid shook her head.

“Let me get dressed and I'll come too.”

“No. Get a message to Reverend Solberg, please. Send Thelma. And look up head injuries like this. Get me as much information as you can.”

“I will. Go with God, Astrid. You know He is right beside you, within you, and all around you.”

“Thank you for the reminder.” Astrid headed for the hospital at a dog trot. She repeated “Please, Lord” with each breath. If only they had the telephones back up.

“What is it?” Miriam asked as soon as Astrid burst through the door.

“Mr. Rasinov collapsed on the way home. Ready the private room for him.”

While the two rushed to prepare for their patient, she lighted the first examining room, then went to the front door just in time to open it for the panting men. “Put him in room one.” She helped them lift the comatose man up on the table and started an examination all over again.

Swelling at the wound site. Need ice for that. There was no way she could tell if any bone was broken. She asked her patient questions, even pinched the skin on his arm, but she received no response. “Let's get him out of these dirty clothes, clean him up, and we'll move him to the private room, where he can be more comfortable.” She turned to his companion. “Will you go out to Freda's house and inform his wife? And if you could, please, stop at the farmhouse and tell my mother what has happened.”

“Of course. He'll be all right, won't he?”

“I pray so. Thank you.” When he left, she felt Daniel's arm go around her shoulders and hug her close. She wagged her head.
The headache was back. “I should never have let him leave. I should have known better.”

“We'll undress him and clean him up. I just heard someone come through the front door.” Thorliff squeezed her shoulder. “This is not your fault. I am certain Reverend Solberg is going to remind you that no matter how good a doctor you are, you are not God, who sees all and knows all.”

“Takk.”
Why did I not err on
the side of caution? Because I am too tired to
make good decisions? Lord, please don't let this man
die because I made a mistake. Please, Lord!

Gray Cloud brought a basin of hot water, a washcloth, and towels. Miriam brought in an ice pack, and the three women left the room. They met Reverend Solberg and Thomas Devlin coming in the door.

“Thelma sent us to Elizabeth, and she brought us up to date.” Solberg stopped in front of Astrid and gripped her upper arms with comforting hands. “Before you go any further, think on this. That Mr. Rasinov collapsed is not your fault. I know you. You gave him the best care possible.”

“Ye know the difference 'twould make, lass, had he remained here in bed? He would die for certain. With a head injury, a bleed is invisible inside the skull. Ye'd not see the problem, and he would die unattended in the night, for he would appear asleep.” Devlin spoke with quiet authority, just like Reverend Solberg.

She heaved a sigh. “You're ganging up on me?”

“No, lass, we be here to help ye and pray for the injured.”

Astrid nodded. “This is one of those times when the telephone would have been such a big help.”

Miriam asked, “Will you perform extreme unction, Father?”

“Aye. Just to be on the safe side, since no one seems to know what his preference might be.”

Reverend Solberg knocked on the door, and the two men went inside to assist.

“We had something like this happen in Chicago,” Miriam said, “a head wound that became an internal bleed.”

“What did you do?”

“The same as here. Made him comfortable and prayed for God's mercy. I remember reading about drilling into the skull to allow the blood to drain out and reduce the brain swelling. But you have to know where to drill, and I've never seen it done.”

“And you need an auger and bit. We don't have one here at the hospital. I could send one of the men home for one. I assume we would drill near the temple, where the wound is already. He said he always bled easily. That would have been an indication it could happen again.”

“But not always, is that so?”

“That is so.”

They had just moved him to the private room and settled him in bed when Mor and Mrs. Rasinov came in the door. Gray Cloud showed them to the room.

Marina Rasinov took the chair by the bed and, clasping her husband's hand, held it to her tear-streaked cheek. “Please, Dmitri, please don't die.”

Ingeborg put an arm around her daughter.

Reverend Solberg put one hand on the wife's shoulder and the other on the patient. “Let us all pray together. We know God is right here, because Jesus promised that wherever two or three are gathered in His name, He is here.” The silence, other than the woman's sniffing back sobs, seemed to stretch until Solberg continued. “Lord God, our Father, Jesus our savior, and Holy Spirit, thou who dwells within us, you know what is happening with this man. We know you bring life and healing, and we ask that of you right now in this place. Cleanse us of any wrong thoughts and fears. Bring your peace and healing, and Lord God, we will give you all the honor and glory, for we know that life and death are in your hands. Amen.”

“In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy
Spirit.” Thomas Devlin made the sign of the cross from the end of the bed.

Reverend Solberg leaned close to the wife, who had laid her husband's hand back beside him and her head on his hand. “We will keep praying, but if you'd like, we could wait in the hall.”

“No. Please don't leave us.”

“We won't.” Ingeborg moved another chair next to Mrs. Rasinov and kept a hand on her shoulder. Father Devlin commenced mumbling his litany.

Miriam and Gray Cloud left to tend the other patients, and Astrid leaned against her husband. She should send him home. He and Thorliff needed their sleep too. It made her feel guilty to want him to stay, but right now, his presence was such a comfort to her.

Should she try the drilling? What if she only made matters worse? She nodded to Daniel and Thorliff and led the way out to the hall. “Miriam said she knew of a procedure of drilling through the skull to release the blood that is putting pressure on the brain. I seem to remember reading about such a thing, but—”

“You have no bit and auger. I will go get one if you want. You can sterilize it,” Daniel offered.

The thought of drilling into the man's skull made Astrid feel weak in the knees. She should have been keeping up more on the latest treatments. So many things she should have done, should have been doing.
Should
was such a horrible word.

“Dr. Bjorklund.” Reverend Solberg beckoned her. “Come.”

Astrid went back to her patient. There seemed to be no difference. Fingers on his pulse, she leaned closer to listen. Had his breathing changed? His body stiffened, relaxed, and he stopped breathing. “He's gone.”

She'd lost another patient. Slowly she turned to the widow. How could she help this poor woman?
Lord God, dear God
.

“In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.”

M
iriam completed the charts at the nurses' station, hung up her apron, and headed toward the door, her duties completed for another shift. She could not forget the scene as Mr. Rasinov died last evening. It was too fresh, too vivid. It weighed on her.

She stopped cold outside Dr. Astrid's office. The woman looked drawn, ragged, harried. And Miriam knew why. She stepped inside. “He would have died either way.”

Dr. Astrid stared at Miriam. “Shouldn't you have gone home by now?”

“Yes. I will, but I saw you and knew you were blaming yourself. We all do that, I think, blame ourselves when it's not our fault. Why would you be different?”

“Why indeed.” Dr. Astrid shook her head. “You are wise beyond your years.”

“You were the one who impressed that on me when the tuberculosis case died on my shift.”

“I never cared much for eating my own words.”

Miriam smiled. “Your mother has said that God does not hold us responsible. He's the only one who makes those decisions. And He loves and forgives us.”

“And you believe that?”

Did she? Completely? Miriam shrugged. “I suppose I do now. I have learned of God's love through all of you. And Father Devlin, and the reverend. Everyone here in Blessing.”

“In spite of the Valders?” Dr. Astrid rubbed her forehead.

“What is that saying about one bad apple can spoil a barrel? Hate and anger are frightening things. I heard Inga tell that to Manny out at the farm one Sunday. Mr. Valders is letting his anger eat away at him, and I know he and his wife are not perfect. The next time he lays into me, I might not be able to still say this. But today I can say that there are far more people like the Bjorklunds and the Knutsons in Blessing than like the elder Valders. In fact, there are only two of them.”

Vera stopped beside them. “I thought you two were going home.”

“I . . . we are.” Dr. Astrid heaved a sigh. “If you need anything . . .”

“I will call Dr. Elizabeth. She said that you are to go home and sleep. She is now on call if we need a doctor today.” Vera finished with a dip of her chin as punctuation. “If that's all right with you.”

Astrid started to say something, but then shook her head slightly and nodded. “I'm feeling ganged up on, but you are all right. All of you. Thank you.” She smiled again. “But if there is a really big emergency, don't leave me out.”

Miriam felt herself relax. Vera had handled that well.

“Reverend Solberg said the funeral will be tomorrow, so they are coming for the body sometime this morning. Mrs. Rasinov asked that she be allowed to sit with her husband's body overnight, like their tradition says, and Reverend Solberg offered the church.” Dr. Astrid stood up. “I feel so sorry for his widow and the children, in a new land with no immediate family around.”

Dr. Astrid and Miriam walked out together.

“You are on again tonight?”

“Yes, ma'am. And tomorrow.”

“Then you will be off on Sunday. Good. Mor is planning on folks for dinner after church, so please keep that in mind.”

But I've
not been invited.
Or was that not necessary? Maybe not. She shivered in the wind. “I think I'd better get my winter coat out.”

“We could have snow any day. Butchering will probably start tomorrow. It is finally cold enough.”

“Oh.” So many things she was learning about the world beyond the big city. Miriam paused at Dr. Astrid's gate. “Sleep well.” She continued on.

Late that afternoon, when she was ready to leave for the hospital again, she came downstairs with her wool coat over her arm to find Trygve leaning against the desk. His one terribly black eye was still slightly swollen, as was his lip.

“Well, you look much better than the last time I saw you.” She felt like patting her chest to make her heart settle back down where it belonged.

He gave her a lopsided grin. “May I walk you to work?”

“Of course you may.”

She heard a snicker from the archway into the dining room. Maisie Landsverk joined them. “The coffee is ready and a sandwich for you, Miriam. You didn't have dinner, you know. Do you have time?”

“I believe so.” She'd been planning on going in early, but plans could easily be changed. She was finally learning that. “Thank you.” Sitting across the table from Trygve, she could see several other bruises on his face. “I thought you would be working at the apartment house.”

“I was, but I left early and will go back.” He nodded to Mrs. Landsverk, who set a sandwich in front of him too. “Thank you.”

“Now I can tell you thank-you properly. I've never had anything as lovely as the carved heart. I am grateful.”

“I'm glad you like it. I know you said once that you did not care to go to church again, and I don't blame you, but . . .”

She laid her sandwich down. “I know what I said, but I have changed my mind, thanks to your aunt Ingeborg.”

“She manages to change lots of people's minds at times. Anner Valders, well, what can I say? I have no idea why he decided to make you an example in church that day, and I can see how embarrassing that was. I ask that you not hold that against the church.”

She smiled. “I'm a little better prepared for Anner Valders' shenanigans now, I think.”

“He took me by surprise too. I won't let it happen again. So. Would you join us at church this Sunday?”

“I would be happy to.”
I would be happy to join anything anywhere with you
. I am confident of that now, even if I have
not told you yet.

He beamed like a child with a new toy. “Thank you!” He took a bite of sandwich. “Did you hear the other news?”

“Probably not.”

“Mr. Nyquist, the other teacher at the school, has turned in his letter of resignation, and Reverend Solberg suggested they hire Thomas Devlin, at least for a temporary fill-in until they can find someone else.”

“That is wonderful.”
So
now Mr. Valders can holler about that
. She cut that thought off as not fitting for her change of mind. “I wish my oldest brother and sister, Tonio and Mercy, could go back to school.”

“They can as soon as we move them here.”

She felt her mouth drop. “What are you saying?”

“I am saying that we'd better get you to the hospital so you are not late.”

“Trygve Knutson, what do you have up your sleeve now?”

“Just thinking ahead.” He stood up, plucked her coat off the table, and held it for her. When she had both arms in the sleeves, he paused to clasp her shoulders.

Oh, how easy it would have been to lean back into his chest. She jerked herself upright and, with shaking hands, buttoned her coat. Attraction, sure, but was this love? She was going to have to sort out what man-woman love really was. She knew it when she saw it, but how did it feel? Like she was feeling?

Anner Valders was not in church that Sunday, nor was Hildegunn. Miriam felt herself relax and enjoy the warmth of Trygve's shoulder right next to hers. Dr. Astrid sat on her other side.

After church, Inga joined them, taking Dr. Astrid's hand and Miriam's as well. “I like seeing you here with all the family, Miriam,” the little girl said. “You belong to us.”

Miriam blinked and smiled back. “Why, thank you.”

“You are coming to Grandma's for dinner.” It wasn't a question. “Emmy and me . . .” She paused, thought, and started again. “Emmy and I have something to show you.”

“What?”

“It's a surprise.”

Miriam could tell the little girl was dying to tell her, but she held firm.

“You can ride with us. We got room in our buggy.”

“Leave it to Inga. It must be nice to be able to say whatever you want.” Trygve did not bother to go over and join the circle of men, instead remaining right beside her. Was he making sure nothing bad happened this time? He leaned closer. “We could walk, if you do not mind the cold.”

“Cold? You have never walked along Chicago's lakefront when the wind is coming in off the water. Thank you for the offer, Inga, but we will walk.”

“And you will ride with us, Inga,” Thorliff said firmly.

They waved as the others loaded into their buggies and wagons, then strode down the street, where he took her hand and
did not let go. Why did hand in hand feel so right, so easy? So warm. Was this part of that man-woman love?

“Do you have a scarf to protect your face?” he asked. “You're going to need it soon.”

“I do. I just haven't taken time to find it.” She'd just pulled her coat out of mothballs a couple days ago. When she turned her face, she could smell the odor. She should have aired it out. “I was on duty and couldn't leave. How did the funeral go?”

“Sad, but the Tent Town people gathered around Mrs. Rasinov and her children, as good friends do.”

“I know how hard it was for my mother when my da died.”

“How long ago was that?”

“It seems so long ago. Truth was just a wee one.”

“I'm looking forward to meeting your family.”

“When will you meet them?”

“At your graduation, if not before.”

She stopped and turned to him. “Trygve, that is the second comment you've made that—”

“That shows I am planning our life together?”

“Well, yes.”

“By the way, Tante Ingeborg agrees that we will be getting married.”

She stopped and turned to him. “What is going on? Has the family voted or something?”

“No. You know how I feel and the rest of them agree. That is all.”

Miriam sucked in a deep breath and continued on. No, this family did not have to vote. They all knew each other completely. One day they would know Miriam as thoroughly, and she would know them.

He began to whistle softly, a strange little tune. His sister and others all said he whistled when he was happy. But she had not revealed her change of heart yet. This was getting so confusing.

“Oh look, all the children are coming to meet us.”

“Great.”

They were running down the lane and laughing. Emmy and Inga led the pack, of course. They seemed to be playing a game of tag, for when Inga drew abreast of Emmy, she swatted her and cried, “You're it!”

Miriam stopped again and turned to him before the kids met them. “What would you say if I agreed? If I admitted I love you?”

“I'd shout hallelujah.”

“Then you'd better start shouting before we get mobbed.”

Trygve grabbed her around the waist and swung her in a circle. “Hallelujah! She loves me!” Then he stopped swinging and kissed her right there in front of all the children and the cows lined up along the fence.

He was so unpredictable.
What have
I gotten myself into?
A sense of peace settled around her heart and her mind. The right thing, the right season. The season to mourn was over, and the season to love was upon her. She had a feeling her family would be happy too. And if this thrill in her breast was joy bubbling up, she never wanted it to stop.