A Flicker of Doubt (Book 4 in the Candlemaking Mysteries) (7 page)

She surveyed the results as I asked, “Shall
we have our second lesson next week?”

“
No, I’m afraid not,” Mrs.
Jorgenson said abruptly. Well, it looked as if I’d blown it after
all. I just hoped we could survive her abandonment

She shocked me by adding, “I don’t think I
can wait that long. Let’s do it again tomorrow, shall we? I’m eager
to get another crack at it” She arched an eyebrow, then added, “No
shortcuts next time, Mr. Black. We do it by the book, the
traditional way.”

“
By the book,” I
promised.

“
Till tomorrow then.” She
picked up her new candles and started for the door.

“
I’ll see you tomorrow,” I
said, fighting to hide the relief from my voice.

So I hadn’t lost her after all.

At least not yet.

Chapter 5

Eve waited until Mrs. Jorgenson was gone,
then said, “Tell me you didn’t use a water bath on those
candles.”

I shrugged. “I would if I could, but you
know how I hate lying to you.”

The look of dread and uncertainty on her
face said more than her question. “Did they turn out all
right?”

I didn’t want to admit my failures, but Eve
would find out sooner or later. “Not so much. One was full of
hairline cracks and the other had pinpricks all over it” She
started to say something when I added, “Don’t worry about it, it’s
not a problem. I used some of our reference books, so I know what I
did wrong.”

“
Is she ever coming back?”
Eve asked, her gaze at the door. She was as aware as I was that
Mrs. J was extremely meticulous about her candlemaking.

“
She wants another lesson
tomorrow,” I said.

Relief flooded her face. “No more baths,
Harrison. Promise me.”

I smiled. “Mrs. Jorgenson’s words exactly.”
I glanced at the clock, realizing that it was nearly time to close.
It was hard to believe all that had happened since I’d decided to
go out in my kayak that morning.

Eve said, “Would you like me to take the
deposit into town tonight? I don’t mind, honestly.”

I knew she hated carrying around the cash
from our day’s take. “No, I don’t mind. You’ve done enough
today.”

She touched my arm lightly, rare physical
contact from her. “Harrison, it will get better with each passing
day. I promise you that.”

“
I hope you’re right,” I
said. I’d managed to keep busy enough so that I hadn’t dwelt on
finding Becka’s body, but I knew the night would be the worst, and
it was something I wasn’t looking forward to.

She said, “Should you see your doctor? I’m
sure he’d be happy to prescribe some sleeping pills to help you
through the night.”

Eve didn’t know that Becka had died from an
overdose, so I couldn’t blame her for suggesting it, but I still
felt my stomach lurch when she mentioned pills. “Thanks, but I’ll
be fine,” I said. We had four minutes left before closing, so I
added, “Why don’t you go on home? I’ve got this covered.”“

“
I don’t mind staying, truly
I don’t”

“
I know that but it might
help me to keep busy. Good night Eve.”

“
Goodnight then.” I knew she
was really worried about me when she didn’t put up a fuss about
leaving early. Normally Eve wanted to stay longer than I did, and I
owned the place.

As I ran the reports from our cash register
and started balancing the till, I suddenly realized that I still
had Becka’s thousand dollars in my pocket. What was I going to do
with it? I surely didn’t want to keep it on me all the time, but I
didn’t want it in my apartment, either. I went into the storeroom
and pulled down one of the rubber molds from the back of the
highest shelf. It was of a Christmas tree, and I loved the candles
it made. I jammed the folded bills up into the peak, then put the
mold back on the shelf where no one would stumble across it One way
or another, that cash would be long gone before people started
buying Christmas molds again.

By the time I got back to the register the
reports were all run. The totals matched the cash, so I made out my
nightly deposit. As I was locking the door behind me on my way to
the bank, I heard a car horn.

Erin Lane, the young woman who owned the
canoe and kayak rental place on the Gunpowder River, was speeding
into the empty parking lot

I waited for her by the steps.

She said, “Harrison, I just heard about what
happened. I’m so sorry.”

“
Thanks,” I said, already
tired of talking about it. If I didn’t have to discuss my
horrendous discovery every ten minutes, maybe I could convince
myself it never happened. ‘

As she approached me, she said, “I can’t
believe you found her in your kayak.”

“
Speaking of which, how
would you like to buy one, dirt cheap? I’m not going to be needing
mine anymore.”

“
Harrison, you can’t let
this stop you from paddling. I know how much you love being out on
the river.”

I took a deep breath and tried to keep my
voice calm. “Erin, if I never go out on the water again, it won’t
break my heart. Do you want it, or should I just put an ad in the
paper?”

Now she was the one who looked like she
wanted to cry. “If that’s what you really want, we can work
something out but we don’t have to talk about it right now. Would
you like some company?”

I thought about it a second, then said,
“Sorry, but I’m not in the mood to talk.”

Erin nodded. “I understand that and I
promise; no questions. I won’t say a word. I’ll just keep you
company.”

“
I appreciate the offer, but
I’m tired and I’m not really in the mood for company. I just want
to drop this off at the bank, then come back here and
crash.”

“
I can take your deposit for
you if you’d like, since it’s on my way home. That way you won’t
have to deal with it tonight”

“
I don’t mind, really, but
thanks for offering.” A hurt expression crossed her face before she
could bury it and I wondered if she thought I didn’t trust her.
“Okay, I give in. Why don’t you ride with me to the bank? I know it
means you’ll have to come back out here with me, but it might be
nice having you go.”

“
That’s great” she said,
immediately brightening.

We walked back to my truck parked in its
space behind the building and I held the door open for her.

“
Thank you, sir,” she
said.

“
You’re welcome.” We rode in
companionable silence to the bank, and Erin was true to her word. I
glanced over at her a few times, but she was looking out the window
as darkness approached.

Finally, I said, “The streetlights are
really pretty from River’s Edge.”

“
You can see them from your
apartment? I thought the trees would get in the way.”

“
I can see them,” I said,
not wanting to share the information that I had a whole other world
on the roof of the complex. It was as private a place as I could
ever have, accessed only through a scuttle in my apartment closet
My great aunt Belle must have enjoyed it as well, and I knew that
sometimes it was the only thing in the world that kept me
sane.

Erin didn’t press me on it I got out at the
bank, made the deposit, then we headed back to River’s Edge.

“
Thank you,” I said as we
neared the complex. “You’re’ as good as your word.”

“
I was glad to come along.
It’s not often I get to ride instead of drive. It always amazes me
how much more I can see from the passenger side.”

“
That’s not what I’m
thanking you for, though I do appreciate your company. I meant
about not quizzing me on what happened.”

“
Harrison, I’m your friend.
If you want to talk, I’m here to listen, but I’m not going to press
you about it”

I thought about it a second, then asked,
“Would you like to see something really special? I’ll show you if
you swear you don’t tell a soul about it”

“
I’m intrigued,” she said.
“Where is it?”

I pointed to toward my place. “Upstairs in
my apartment.”

Erin laughed. “You certainly know how to get
a girl’s attention, but if you’ve got etchings up there to show me,
I’m going to push you out of your own window.”

“
It’s nothing like that. I
promise.”

“
Then lead on,” Erin
said.

She followed me upstairs to my place, then I
led her back to the bedroom. I noticed an uncertain expression on
her face, but she didn’t say a word. When I stepped into the
closet, she was openly baffled by my behavior.

It was time to explain before she bolted on
me. “This is the scuttle to the roof. It’s where I go when I want
to get away from the world. Nobody but you knows about it now.”

“
I’m honored,” she said
softly. I climbed the rungs, with Erin just behind me. I grabbed
the flashlight from the hook near the hatch, then realized I had
only one of everything on the roof. There’d been no need to have
duplicates, since I was the only one who ever went up there. “You
need to stay close to me,” I said.

. I flipped the hatch open and stepped
through, then moved aside so Erin could climb up. She looked around
in wonder and said, “Hey, you really can see the lights of town
from here.”

“
Like I said, this is where
I go to get away. I don’t want anyone to know where I’m at when I
disappear.”

She nodded. “You have my word.”

I led her to the storage Inn where I kept my
chair, blankets and umbrella. After pulling the chair out and
setting it up, I offered it to her and sat on the bin itself.

She shivered in the chilled air and said,
“Do you mind if I borrow one of those blankets?”

“
Not at all,” I said as I
retrieved one and handed it to her. I’d positioned the chair so she
could see the lights of Micah’s Ridge, but not my face. It was
somehow easier sitting there in the darkness not having to make eye
contact as we spoke.

In the shadows, I began to talk. “I met
Becka seven years ago. She was gorgeous, the kind of woman I
ordinarily never would have approached, but she did that herself. I
was at an art gallery opening in Charlotte where a friend of mine
was showing his sculptures, and Becka was there with some friends
as well. Her heel caught on the carpet and she literally fell into
my arms. We dated off and on for a few years after that. It’s hard
to describe what attracted me to her.” I paused, then said, “Okay,
she was great-looking, but that only goes so far. There was
something about her—a drive to follow her own heart— that attracted
me. Was she perfect? Far from it, but there Was a bond between us I
still can’t explain. Even when she was doing her best to drive me
crazy, I still cared about her. Nothing romantic, mind you—not in
the last ten or eleven months, anyway—but she was a part of my
life, and now she’s gone....” I hadn’t meant to make such a
long-winded speech, and I felt embarrassed by it

Erin took it all in, then said softly, “It’s
okay to miss her, Harrison.”

I felt the tears come. I hadn’t wept since
Belle had died, but I couldn’t stop them. Erin stood, moved near
and put her arms around me, nestling my head to her chest. She
stroked my hair and hummed softly as the emotion ran through me,
until it finally faded I pulled away and said, “Sony about that, I
don’t know what happened”

“
Do you feel better?” she
asked.

“
You know what? I do.
Thanks.”

Erin stepped away and said, “Thank you for
sharing all of this with me, Harrison.”

“
I’m glad I did.”

She looked up at the stars and said, “How
could I not love it? Could I come back up another time?”

“
That sounds great. We can
have a picnic sometime.”

Erin shivered. “Sometime warm, maybe.”

“
It is getting chilly, isn’t
it? Let’s go downstairs. I’ll make us some coffee.”

I turned the flashlight on and led her back
to the scuttle. “Do you have any hot chocolate?” she asked once we
were back in my apartment.

“
You’d better believe it.
I’ve even got marshmallows,” I said with a smile.

After we had our cocoa, Erin said, ‘This was
fun. I enjoy hanging out with you, Harrison.”

“
Thanks, I needed this more
than I realized.” I walked her to her car, and she surprised me by
giving me a peck on the cheek. “Call me any time,
Harrison.”

When I walked back upstairs, I found Markum
leaning against my door. The accordion folder we’d retrieved from
Becka’s apartment was sitting on top of a box he had tucked under
one arm.

I asked, “How long have you been here?”

“
Not long enough to matter.
I saw you had company so I waited until she was gone. Are you ready
to do some more digging?”

The calm ease I’d felt with Erin drained
quickly away, but I knew I owed it to Becka to find out what had
really happened to her. “I’m ready.”

We walked in the apartment and I picked up
the

coffee mugs Erin and I had used for our
cocoa. “Do you want anything?” I asked.

“
No, I’m good. Listen, I’m
sorry to do this to you. I know you’ve had the mother of all bad
days, but our only chance here is to jump on this before the trail
gets too cold.”

“
I agree,” I said. “So
what’s in the box?”

He put the folder to one side and brought
out a woman’s handbag. I recognized it as Becka’s. “Where did you
find that?”

“
It was in the water a
thousand yards downstream from the overlook. I got soaked getting
it, but it was worth it.”