A Dream to be Loved Kandi Jaynes (10 page)

Kate sent the two men helping her to lunch. She leaned against a shelf in the back and took a deep breath. "You have got to get a grip." Turning, she spotted the soft cotton buffs stacked beside her. She reached over picked one up and slammed it against the post.

"Abusing the buffs again I see. Do you suppose there's a support group for that?"

Kate spun around and found Ray standing just behind her.

"If there is feel free to sign me up. I'm willing to try anything at this point."

Her supervisor gave her a gentle smile, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Kate heaved a sigh and blinked back the tears threatening to spill. "No. It's time for lunch. I'll use the time to try and pull myself together as well as get something to eat."

"Okay, but if there's anything I can do, let me know."

Kate smiled, "Thanks, Ray. I really appreciate the offer."

"Anytime." He patted her shoulder and walked out. Kate took another deep breath and closed her eyes. It was just a kiss. I was too tired to think straight. End of story. Now get over it and do your job.

She hadn't been able to concentrate on anything all morning. Well, anything other than Drake and last night's kiss, that is. She had tried to stay indifferent to him and couldn't. She knew he had been trying to carefully entrench himself in her life. She just hadn't known how to stop it. Dropping her head into her hands, she whispered, "This wasn't supposed to happen." Last night she had been tired after a hard day. He had held her, kept her warm while she slept, fed her when she was hungry, and talked to her when she would've otherwise been lonely. She had been alone for so long. Other than Drake, she couldn't honestly remember the last time someone had hugged her.

Then there was that kiss. His kisses always stirred something in her, but last night she had wanted to kiss him back. Had started to kiss him back. Kate raised her head and took one more deep, calming breath. Even being as tired and vulnerable as she was she had stopped. She hadn't let it continue. She found some comfort in that and decided to make a renewed effort to get her job done as soon as she took a break.

As Kate entered the break room everyone went quiet. She noticed the men all looking at her.

"What?" she asked, as she glanced down to make sure everything was properly zipped and buttoned.

Terry was the first to speak. "We were just watching to see if your head was going to spin all the way around."

Kate knew she had been in a bad mood and had taken it out on people she shouldn't have. She looked at all the faces staring at her with guarded expressions, and couldn't help but smile. "That bad, huh?"

"Bad? I thought we were going to have to put poor Dave in therapy after his last trip to the cage."

Steve joined in. "We always thought they locked you in there to protect you from us. Now we know it was actually to protect us from you. We've all been trying to send Smitty for our tools today, but even he wouldn't go. He said you had too many sharp objects in there."

Kate bought a soda from the machine and sat down. The two men she sat between scooted away from her. A laugh escaped her and she shook her head. "I've been dealing with your foul moods for years. There's not one of you that hasn't come to the window and cussed or yelled at one time or another. Bad days, broken tooling, program errors, cars that don't run, relationship problems, the list goes on and I've heard it all. So if I have a bad day now and then the least you guys can do is return the favor and deal with it."

"Well now. You bring up a good point," Terry said. "We share with you, so there's no reason you can't share with us."

Kate looked skeptical. "What do you mean?"

"I mean obviously something has you all riled up. I'm guessing it's the flower guy. So who is he and what'd he do?"

"I'm just having a bad day. Everybody does once in a while. Today is just my turn. In case you haven't noticed I have an unusual workload this week and I'm tired." Kate stood up, "I'd better get back. It may take me a while to find the guys who were helping me. They're probably hiding from me by now."

She did manage to do better the second half of the day. She apologized to her helpers and made a point to be extra nice to them until they were done.

That evening she went home, took a quick shower, and packed a change of clothes in her overnight bag. She arrived at Sue's a short time later.

"Hi, I need a place to crash tonight. Do you have any plans for this evening?"

"I have a date, but I could cancel," replied Sue surprised.

"No, don't cancel. I'm exhausted and just want a quiet place to be until tomorrow morning."

"You live alone outside of town with no close neighbors. Why would you come to my apartment in town for a quiet place to be?"

"Lets just say my house isn't as quiet as it used to be." Kate walked over and plopped down on the couch. "Will I be in the way? I can go out to eat if you and your date were going to stay in tonight. Or you could use my place."

"No, we were going out. I have to work in the morning so we weren't planning to be late. He'll be here in about twenty minutes and I should be back by nine or so. Are you sure you don't want me to cancel? Do you need to talk?"

"No. I'm tired of talking. The time alone will be nice. You go and enjoy your date."

Kate managed to avoid Drake over the next two days. It gave her a chance to regroup and convince herself she had blown things out of proportion where Drake was concerned.

Friday at lunchtime the phone rang. "Hi, Kate. Are you going to run off somewhere this weekend?"

"No, I have too much to do this weekend to be able to get away." She hoped he would take the hint, but wasn't surprised when he didn't.

"I'm glad you'll be around. I haven't seen you much lately." There was accusation in his voice.

"I've been busy."

"Busy avoiding me?" Was that humor she heard in his tone now? "You can't do that forever though. If you don't agree to go out with me I may be forced to camp on your doorstep. I have a tent, and I'm not afraid to use it."

It irritated her he could rouse her sense of humor so easily. She couldn't stay mad at someone she found amusing. Also, she would never convince him she wasn't interested if she kept letting him draw her into these teasing and sometimes flirtatious conversations.

"Just because you haven't seen me, doesn't mean I've been avoiding you. It simply means I don't feel the need to pencil you in on my list of things to do." She tried to sound stern, but got the feeling she didn't come across that way when the sound of his laughter echoed through the phone.

She was glad he couldn't see her face when his voice dropped into that tone that always seemed to flow over her and caress her nerve endings. "I want to see you this weekend, Kate. We can go to dinner and a movie, or we can spend the evening at your house. We could go to my apartment if you like. I could show you where I live. That way you could come and visit me whenever you like."

"Gee, it all sounds so great I just can't make up my mind. Tell you what, I'll think about it and get back to you. Now I have to get to lunch before my break is over. Bye."

Kate hung up and grabbed her purse. When she had her lunch and sat down at her usual table, everybody stared at her. "Now what?"

"You were talking to the flower guy just now, weren't you?" Terry accused.

"Don't you people have anything better to do than spy on me? What makes you think it was the flower guy?"

"Because you get all girlie when he's on the phone," Steve said. "And now we know."

"Know what?" she asked with a casualness she didn't feel.

"We know it's someone in the building. Someone who works here."

"What are you talking about?" Kate asked, getting more nervous by the minute.

"The phone call was an inside call. I was walking by the cage when it rang." His eyes narrowed." Two short rings."

"You guys sure jump to a lot of conclusions," she said, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"Come on, give. Who is he?" Steve asked.

Kate didn't answer, just took another bite of her sandwich, dabbing her mouth with a napkin.

Steve, who loves drama, stood up acting like a character out of an old black and white mystery. He squinted one eye and looked around the table, then in some unrecognizable foreign accent said, "We know it is someone in this building. Someone we all know. It could be someone in this very room. How do we know he isn't sitting at this very table?" He sat back down and again looked at each man.

Terry threw his hands in the air. "Okay, I confess! It's me!"

Kate laughed so hard her sides ached. As the laughing subsided, she reached over and patted Terry's rounded stomach, "As long as we're confessing we might as well tell them the rest. He's expecting my child."

This time everyone else at the table laughed until they hurt. Except Terry who was trying his best to look offended.

"No, it's not Terry," Kate said.

"Why not? What's wrong with me?"

"I just wouldn't have the conscience for it. You often talk about all the women who chase you. I would feel too guilty about taking you away from all of them."

"Okay," Steve said. "It's not Terry. We're weeding out suspects."

"What about me?" Ron asked.

"You mean other than the fact you're married?" Kate questioned.

"If you consider that a problem, then I guess that rules out Dennis and Paul here, too."

Steve spoke up again. Kate wasn't sure whether he was trying to sound French or German. "Good, good. Now we're getting somewhere. What about Smitty?"

Kate looked at Smitty and grinned. He was wriggling his eyebrows and flexing the muscles in his chest. Kate heaved a deep dramatic sigh. "I have to admit Smitty does give a girl something to think about. Unfortunately I just don't think I could get past the tattoos. Sorry, Smitty." She often teased him about his tattoos.

Steve looked past Kate, "What about Drake?"

Kate turned and found Drake standing a few feet from her.

He looked directly at her. "Yes, Kate, what about me?"

This game suddenly wasn't so fun. She refused, however, to give these guys any hint he was the flower guy. She eyed him for a moment. "I don't think so. He's too... I don't know, VP-ish."

"VP-ish?" Drake asked.

"Yeah, you know, big office, starchy dress shirts. Preppy." She gave him an apologetic look. "Basically not my type at all."

"Come on, Kate, the guy has to dress that way for his job," Dave said. "It isn't fair to judge a guy on how he dresses for work."

"Yeah," added Terry, "He's probably not so preppy outside of work." The other guys at the table nodded and agreed.

Kate couldn't believe they were all defending him. She looked around the table and stated, "Have you seen what he drives?"

Whistles, nods, and various sounds of understanding came from around the table. Steve looked at Drake sympathetically, "She's gotcha there, dude. You don't get much more preppy than that."

Drake grinned. "The car's not mine. A week before I left Indy some kid was showing off in his new sports car and totaled mine while it was parked. Bill rented this one for me until I can replace mine. So far I haven't had much time to car shop." He smiled at Kate. "So what kind of car do you see me in that isn't too preppy for you?"

"Hmm." Kate put her finger on her chin and squinted. "Possibly a small SUV."

He contemplated her a moment. "What do you drive?"

She realized her car was always in the garage, he probably hadn't ever seen it when he was over. "Us working girls can't afford fancy new cars. I drive a really old car."

Gasps and shrieks of outrage erupted around her.

Steve grabbed his chest. "Blaspheme! How dare you call it that."

Terry groaned with his head down on the table. "I can't believe she said that."

Drake's brow furrowed at the odd display. "What does she drive?"

Dave ignored the glare Kate gave him and looked at Drake. "She drives the one car in the parking lot we've all tried to get our hands on at one time or another. It's an all original nineteen sixty-six Mustang convertible."

Drake's eyes widened. "The blue one? I've seen it in the parking lot." He looked at Kate. "That's your car?"

"Yes." The buzzer rang signaling lunch was over and they all cleared their things and went back to work.

Kate was a bit jumpy the rest of the afternoon. She hadn't given Drake an answer about plans for the weekend and didn't think he would just forget about it. She didn't know if he would come to the cage, or he would wait and show up at her house.

She had considered spending the weekend with Sue or Missy, but didn't want to have to explain her actions. Sue still wondered about the other night. She could simply lock herself in the house and pretend she wasn't home if he came. That seemed too childish. She should just tell him once and for all she didn't want to see him anymore and be done with it. Although she had been fairly blunt about that before, and he hadn't ever listened.

The workday finally ended with no sign of Drake. Kate went home and changed into an old tee shirt and shorts intending to do her usual Friday night housework.

Part way through, the doorbell rang. It had to be Drake, her friends always just walked in. She found it strange she hadn't seen much of them lately. She knew she looked a mess. Her braid had come partially loose, her clothes were old, and she probably had dust all over her. She thought about ducking into the laundry room and pulling something better out of the dryer, then decided he would simply have to deal with her the way she was if he insisted on popping in at all hours. She walked over and pulled the door open. "What?"

"Well, hello to you too," Drake replied. "Can I come in?"

"I really am busy. I don't have time to socialize this evening." She didn't move.

"What are you doing? Is it something I can help you with?"

"Thanks for the offer, but no. I'm cleaning house."

"How long will it take?"

"I don't know I've let things go lately, so it will probably take a long time."

"I have to take care of a few things myself this evening, so I'll go do that and be back here in about two hours. That will give you time to work, then we can spend the rest of the evening together."