Read A Christmas to Believe In Online
Authors: Claire Ashgrove
into the chilly winter morning. No use harping on him. He'd
only push back.
As she hurried down the walk to her car, she fumbled in
her pocket for her keys. A faint glimmer of grey-lavender light
touched the horizon, but the stars still shone down, not yet
ready to surrender to morning. Dawn brought bitter cold,
lending credence to the forecaster's predicted snows later in
the week. Her breath billowed around her; she huddled
deeper into her coat.
From the barn, a thump brought her up short. She'd
almost forgotten Clint's horse. Turning to investigate, she
56
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
found a dark blue pickup truck parked in front of the barn.
Faint light spilled from the cracked-open door, and the
thumping gave way to the steady pound of a hammer.
Her heart skipped a beat. He was here.
She scowled at her body's reaction. All night, she'd tossed
and turned, unable to shake the memory of their almost-kiss.
In a futile attempt to chase away her curiosity, she'd even
given in at one point and let the fantasy come to life. But that
had only made sleeping more miserable. Now, when she
finally had her mind trained to the mountain of work on her
office desk, that incredible imaginary kiss reached in and
curled a fist around her stomach.
If she were smart, she'd get in her car and leave without a
good morning. Only, smart behavior was rude behavior, and
she didn't intend to let what had almost happened drive a
wedge between her and Clint. They were too close. Besides,
she'd decided she wouldn't go down that path. Kisses
wouldn't happen.
Swallowing to alleviate the jittering of her belly, she
adjusted her hat and started for the barn. The snow crunched
beneath her dress boots. A crisp gust rose up to swirl her
calf-length skirt up to her thighs. She swiped at the fabric,
catching it before it could rise higher. If he'd been anyone
else, she'd have thrown the idea of a hello out the window
and ran back to her car. At least it would block the wind. But
the barn would too, and she determined not to give Clint a
reason to suspect anything had her out of sorts.
She pushed the door open wider and slipped inside. The
steady racket amplified. Following the sound, she made her
57
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
way to Clint's horse's stall and discovered him crouched
inside, nailing a board between a gap in two others.
His coat hung on the nearby rail. Moving to it, Jesse leaned
her elbows on the tanned suede and waited for him to finish
the task. As he worked, thick muscles in his shoulders pulled
and bunched. Beneath the woven fabric of his long-sleeved
grey Henley, his forearms were tight. Larger than she'd ever
remembered Clint being. Had he started a workout routine?
Or was that yet another fantastic aspect she'd never noticed
before?
She squeezed her eyes shut, unwilling to let her mind
travel down that path. What did it matter? His body might
make her lightheaded, but he would still leave. In seven days.
When she looked again, he stood at his horse's side, the
thick black neck blocking Jesse from Clint's line of sight. She
watched as he tugged off a leather glove, ran his hand
affectionately down the mare's shoulder. He bent over, slid
strong fingers down her foreleg, lifted a hoof, dusted off dry
shavings.
"Hey, sweetheart. How you feeling, girl? How's that baby
of mine? I brought your blanket with me. We'll get you settled
in right and get you warm."
His husky murmurs sent goose bumps rippling down
Jesse's arms. She shifted her weight, suddenly uncomfortable
with watching him. She shouldn't be here. This was Clint's
time with his horse. He'd never want anyone to see this
softer, tender side of him.
Yet, the scene that played out before her froze her in
place. He massaged the mare's shoulder, rubbed the wide
58
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
expanse of her belly. Crouched down on the opposite side of
the horse where he couldn't possibly witness an onlooker, he
devoted himself to pampering his mare.
And to Jesse's horror, a longing to be on the receiving end
of those strong hands curled her belly into a knot. If he were
half as good with women, as he was with this horse...
She bit down on her tongue to stop the thought before it
could take hold. She cleared her voice and tried for
nonchalance. "Morning, Clint."
His head popped over the mare's back so fast, the horse
took a quick sidestep. For a priceless moment, his handsome
features washed with shock before he found a lazy grin.
"Morning." He gave the horse's rump a pat, passed behind
her tail, and let himself out of the stall. "I was just filling in
the gaps in the wall. I hope you don't mind—I can't risk her
getting a foot caught."
His amber gaze burned into her, warm and as rich as
burnished brass. Though a good couple of feet separated
them, the heat of his body begged her arms to wind around
his neck. She gave into the pull, stepped closer to welcome
him with a tight hug.
As his arms wrapped around her waist and she caught the
musky aroma of his aftershave, her heart tripped into her
ribs. With his gentle squeeze, she shut her eyes. Oh yes, she
could get used to this. Fast. Those hard pectorals pillowed her
cheek like down.
Remembering herself, she let go before she lingered too
long. Offering him a smile, she stepped back and pulled her
59
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
coat around her more tightly. "I don't mind. Do what you
need to. Make yourself at home."
His gaze skipped down to her toes, then back up to rest on
hers. Those mesmerizing eyes flickered with appreciation
before he twisted around to retrieve a plastic bucket. The
same way they'd intensified seconds before she'd known he
was going to kiss her.
Jesse dragged in a shaky breath. "I'm, ah, off to work."
She swallowed to alleviate the cottony feel in her throat. "Just
thought I'd stop in to say good morning. Ethan's at the house
if you need anything while you're here. I'm off now." Her
hands shoved into her pockets, she started for the door.
Clint ground his teeth against a snort.
If he needed
anything.
The only thing he needed right now was Jesse's
mouth on his. Good God, he should have moved his horse
first thing. But somewhere last night, amongst his many other
delusions, he convinced himself leaving Angel at Jesse's was a
good idea.
So he could be closer to the woman.
He'd rationalized it by telling himself he would offend her if
he moved his horse. But when he'd seen her standing on the
other side of the stall, her dark hair tumbling around her
shoulders beneath her adorable red hat, he'd realized his
decision had nothing to do with offending Jesse and
everything to do with misplaced desire.
His gaze riveted on her backside as she approached the
rolling door. Long legs fit into calf-high black boots. The slight
heel added to the allure of her office attire.
That
woman was
supposed to live in jeans, muddy boots, and old T-shirts.
60
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
Nowhere in the encyclopedia of what he knew about Jesse did
it read skirts, dress coats, and a touch of makeup. The last
time she'd worn a dress and heels, she looked like a giraffe
on roller skates. Now, she walked as if she'd grown up in
them.
"Jesse." Her name popped out against his will.
Half in the doorway, she turned around, that damnable
smile bright and breathtaking.
He faltered. The sudden tightness in his chest made
speech impossible. Now what? He'd stopped her retreat, but
what did he say now?
Lunch. Ask her to lunch. She's just
Jesse.
He took a deep, steadying breath.
"Have lunch with me?"
At her partly open mouth and wide eyes, he hurried to
soften the edge of desperation in his question. "Heath's
already out and about today. Alex is meeting with Keeley's
lawyers. Mom's going to drive me insane with this wedding
planning. I have to have my tux fitted, and I thought we
could meet up for lunch since I'll be in town anyway."
There. That sounded casual. Normal. No reason for her to
think he had anything else in mind but a good lunch with an
old friend. Even if his traitorous body refused to see her as a
simple friend.
"Ah." Her smile slowly spread across her face. She dipped
her head in a nod. "Sure. I went over with Alex last week—I'll
meet you at the shop?"
He felt the tug of a grin and gave it free reign. The tension
in his muscles fled, and he let out a breath he hadn't realized
he was holding. "My appointment's at twelve-fifteen."
61
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
"I'll meet you there." With a delicate lift of slender fingers,
she waved good-bye and slipped out the door.
Clint sank against the stall wall, surrendering to a groan.
He was done for. No use fighting it any more, he wanted
Jesse. Logical, illogical—he no longer cared. Every fiber of his
body awakened to her impromptu hug, and no amount of
sense would cool the heat she poured into his veins.
He'd just have to figure out how to keep the situation in
hand. No getting caught up in each other. They were friends.
They could be lovers. As long as they both understood the
boundaries, this could work. Heath and Alex didn't have to
know. Neither he, nor Jesse, would suffer their taunts, and on
the surface, everything would remain as it always had been.
He pushed a hand through his hair, and shook his head.
Right. Nothing would remain like it had been. He was only
deluding himself.
But Jesse was a grown woman. Hell, for that matter,
neither one of them were kids anymore. The way her blue
eyes intensified when she looked at him. The open invitation
she'd treated him to last night... She wanted him every bit as
much as he wanted her. And he wasn't going to be the fool
who danced around desire and lay awake at night in torment,
when the solution stood right in front of him.
Jesse. Who'd have ever thought he'd come home to fall for
his little sister?
He let out a heavy sigh and pushed himself off the wall.
Letting himself inside the stall, he summoned his
determination and trained his thoughts back to his horse.
62
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
Lunch was still five and a half hours away. He had plenty of
things to accomplish before then.
He picked up a hard bristled brush and approached Angel.
Running it down the length of her dark coat, he lost himself to
what lay in his soul. The beauty of horses, the way when he
worked with them, nothing else could intrude upon the peace
they created. Bills didn't matter. Lost races became
insignificant. His inability to be the man his father had been
faded to the recesses of his mind.
When Angel's coat was free of tiny shavings particles, and
her tail shone with the bright morning light, he set the brush
back on the wooden rail and ventured to his truck. He
retrieved her heavy winter blanket and a small box of medical
supplies. Back inside the barn, he set the box inside the stall
and eased the deep burgundy blanket over her back. Two
twists of his wrists fastened the closures across her chest. He
folded the rest over her withers, waiting to see how her
morning tests came out before he secured the rest of the
fasteners.
Rummaging through the box, he picked out a small plastic
vial and returned to the mare's side. "Easy, girl. I know you
aren't fond of this."
With a reassuring pat to her flank, he slipped his hand to
her udder, positioned the vial, and squeezed out a few drops
of milk. When he had what he needed, he gave her another
pat and returned to the box. A small squeeze-bottle of
distilled water provided the rest of what he needed, and he
added several more drops to the collected milk. He gave it a
shake, then dropped in a pH test strip.
63
A Christmas to Believe In
by Claire Ashgrove
As he pulled it out, a hard ball of dread rolled around in his
gut. Her calcium read high, as it had been for the last two
days. However, where her pH had been off the charts
yesterday, today it dropped into reading zone. Still over
seven, but the drop indicated progress.
Progress she should not be making until after December
31st.
"Damn it," he muttered.
He shook out the vile and dropped everything into the box.
Turning around, he stared at his mare. "You can't do this to
me, girl. Twelve days. That's all."