A Baby in the Bunkhouse (18 page)

Sweeping her up into his arms, he carried her to her bedroom. Satisfaction unfurled within him as he set her down next to the bed. His own body shaking with the effort it took to suppress his pressing needs, he let her go long enough to strip down to his skin.

Her eyes widened at the sight of his arousal, and then their lips came together once again.

Slowly, deliberately, he undressed her, too. Delighting in the sight of her, he took his time uncovering every supple curve. Kissing and touching, paying homage, until the remnants of past heartaches and disappointments faded away, and there was just the joy they found in being together the way they were meant to be.

He caressed her creamy breasts and rosy nipples, going lower still, until her skin was so hot it burned and her hips rose instinctively to meet him.

They dropped onto the bed. He lay astride her and parted her legs. Their mouths meshed again as he touched and rubbed and stroked. She caressed him in turn, taking him to new heights. She ran her hands over his chest. Shifting onto her side, she moved closer, until skin met skin and her thighs moved with delicious friction against his. He shifted, so she was lying on top of him. Running her hands up and down his arms, she kissed him, not the tentative exploratory kisses of their initial courtship, but deep, urgent kisses that rocked him to his soul.

Jacey sighed as he found a way to slip his hands between their bodies and touch her there. He was making her want, making her need. A hunger unlike any she had ever felt built inside. Awash in sensation, she closed her eyes and arched against him. Seconds later, she fell apart in his hands, and then he was shifting her back down again. And they became one. Gloriously, wonderfully one.

Her body took up the same timeless rhythm as his. He took her higher still, going slow, going deep, until she heard the soft, whimpering sounds in her throat, until his body was shuddering, too, and all was lost in a blinding explosion of heat.

Together, they drifted back down. Sated with love, damp with sweat, Jacey collapsed against his chest. She could feel the thundering of his heart, in tempo to hers, even as she nestled against him contentedly and rested her head on his shoulder.

Luxuriating in all that was Rafferty, Jacey lifted her head and looked into his eyes. They might not have said the words yet, but she knew she loved him, and for her—for now—that was Christmas enough.

 

R
AFFERTY WOKE ALONE
, in his own bed. Once again, he and Jacey had been forced to part company and had spent the night alone. And although he was happy to do whatever needed to be done to protect Jacey's privacy, as well as his own, he was not content with the situation as it was.

He was tired of sneaking around. Tired of hiding his feelings for Jacey. She was the best thing that had ever happened to him. It was past time everyone knew how serious he was about giving Jacey—and Caitlin—the happiness they deserved.

He was still thinking about how to do that when he walked into the kitchen that morning.

Caitlin was sitting in her infant seat, alternately fingering a cloth-covered snap-on rattle in the shape of a rooster, and watching Jacey put the finishing touches on the gingerbread house they had abandoned the night before.

Rafferty helped himself to some coffee, then lounged against the counter, appreciating the sight. “What are your plans for the day?”

Jacey opened a bag of dark green mints. “A little baking. Some gift-wrapping. And the first chef interview.”

Rafferty accepted her wordless invitation to plant the sugary discs in the snow in front of one half of the house, while she did the other. “Is he going to cook?”

Finished, Jacey piped a little more icing on top of the shrubbery. “All part of the screening process. Fortunately, the guys will be back by then, so they can sample the food and give their two cents.”

He suppressed the need to forget everything else but the chemistry flowing between them. “I hope they're…kind.”

She bent to inspect her work. “Why wouldn't they be?”

He moved back reluctantly. “You're a hard act to follow.”
And they don't want you to leave any more than I do.

Jacey straightened abruptly, the soft swell of her breast brushing his biceps. She stepped back. An emotion he couldn't decipher simmered in her eyes. “Don't be silly. This guy has cooked at half a dozen ranches. I'm sure he'll be fine.” She paused to lick her lips. “What are you going to do?”

Start securing our future.

He looked at Jacey, then Caitlin, and back again. “I'm going into Fort Stockton.”

“For…?”

It wouldn't take much to get it out of him, especially if he kissed her again. Telling himself this was one instance in which timing was everything, Rafferty shrugged. “It's a secret.”

An aha! expression crossed her pretty face. “You're beginning to sound like you might have caught the Christmas spirit,” she teased.

Rafferty winked. Giving in to the desire that had been building since he had first walked in, he circled his hands around her waist and shifted her against him. “I don't know about that,” he said, feeling the soft surrender of her slender body as it molded against his. “You might have to keep working on me.”

He cut off whatever else she had been about to say with a soft, persuasive kiss. She had used a mint-flavored mouthwash and it mingled with the sweet taste that was her. He took full advantage of their alone time, foraging her mouth, reminding her of all they had shared the night before. When she moaned, he drew her even more flush against him. He wanted her to feel his hardness, to know how much she aroused him, and he wanted to pleasure her, too. The press of their bodies, the thrust and parry of their tongues, sent a wake-up call to every inch of his body. And Rafferty knew when they did make love again—hopefully very soon—it would be hotter, and more exciting than ever.

Knowing that would have to wait until they could take the time with each other they needed, he let the kiss come to a lazy halt and drew back reluctantly.

Jacey's eyes were soft and misty, her lips dewy. To his immense satisfaction, she looked every bit as turned on as he was.

“You've absolutely got to stop distracting me,” Jacey whispered, looking as if she wanted nothing more than to start kissing him again.

Only the happy gurgle of her infant daughter, the shake of a rattle and the sound of a door shutting kept them from doing just that.

Rafferty unhooked his hands from around Jacey's waist and glanced out the window. “Sounds like my dad is back.” Eli had been off early, on another Christmas errand.

Jacey playfully tapped his backside. “You better get a move on, cowboy. Don't want to be caught kissing me when there's no mistletoe.”

Actually, Rafferty thought, he would. Which was why he had to go to Fort Stockton. It was time he took the next important step in their relationship. Past time, actually.

When he returned, four hours later, the hired hands still weren't back from El Paso. Baffled as to why there was no other vehicle in the driveway—there should have been if the chef applicant was there as scheduled—Rafferty went into the bunkhouse.

It smelled great—thanks to the beef and jalapeño pepper stew simmering in the two big Crock-Pots sitting on the stainless-steel counter—but that was Jacey's recipe.

Wondering what had happened to the chef who was supposed to interview that night, Rafferty headed over to the ranch house. His dad was no help since he was sound asleep on the living-room sofa. Rafferty covered him with an afghan and went in search of Jacey.

He heard her talking to what sounded like her sister as he walked down the hallway toward the bedroom.

His gut tightened as he picked up on the tension of the discourse. “…of course I miss the city…”

Just as Angelica had.

Exasperation colored Jacey's low tone. “I know I said I was only going to be here through Christmas, Mindy…but the guys need me.” Jacey sighed. “I just don't feel that I can leave until there is a replacement…. It's not that easy.” She paused, and then continued, her voice tight, “I've spent weeks looking for someone who might take the job, and the most likely candidate of all was a no-show today. He bailed when he realized just how far out the ranch is. I'm thinking about rescheduling, or maybe even calling off the interview in Austin on the twenty-sixth…and just staying on the ranch. Everyone here has come to mean a lot to me.”

Rafferty's hopes rose.

His hand closed around the gift in his pocket.

Aware this situation was turning out better than he had dared hope, he peered around the corner of Jacey's bedroom. The door was open. She was surrounded by wrapping paper and presents, and had her back to him. The phone was right next to her, the speaker button glowing red.

Mindy's voice came out of the receiver as loudly as if she were standing there in the room. “It's because of Rafferty Evans, isn't it?”

Jacey ran an aggravated hand through her dark brown hair. “Don't start,” she warned.

Mindy continued, like the oft-overbearing big sister she was. “I can't help it. Mom's not here anymore. Someone has to watch out for you.”

“I'm a grown woman.”

“Whose judgment is apparently all askew.”

“I know what I'm doing.”

“I know you just had a baby and your hormones are raging. As is your biological need to nest and provide safety for your offspring.”

“I can do that on my own!”

“Exactly what I'm trying to tell you!”

Jacey buried her face in her hands and groaned in aggravation.

Mindy persisted. “Let's look at this logically, okay? You've just spent the last ten years working in property management. You've got a fine career going there, but if you step off that track on a whim, it may not be so easy to get back on, particularly since you were more or less let go from your last job.”

“I'd still be there if I were willing to leave Caitlin with a sitter all day and I'm not.”

“I get that the position at the ranch has served a purpose in the short term, but what about the long term? Is this really what you want for yourself and your daughter?”

“She's happy here.”

“And you won't be, not as a ranch employee with no real chance at advancement.”

Jacey fell silent.

She still had her back to him, but he could tell she looked miserable.

Guilt filled him anew as he realized he was about to ruin another woman's life by expecting her to give up everything just to be with him. He had never wanted to hurt or constrain Jacey. He wanted to give her the world….

On the phone, Mindy continued, more contritely, “Look, honey, I'm sorry to be so harsh, but you're doing what you always do here. You're allowing yourself to get comfortable in a place where you shouldn't be staying on permanently, just because it's easy and feels good to you now. And in the process, you're severely limiting your own future, and now by extension, your little girl's. What about your dreams? Your hopes? Your aspirations?”

Jacey threw up her hands and sat back in her chair. “I've told you a million times, I don't want to go back to school to get an MBA!”

But Jacey did, Rafferty thought, want to open her own kitchenware and cookbook boutique. She simply did not feel she was financially in a place to take the risk.

“Don't fall into the same old trap and shortchange yourself once again,” Mindy pleaded. “Forget about what's best for all those cowboys, and for once in your life, take a risk and do right by you!”

Rafferty walked away as silently as he'd approached.

As much as he did not want to admit it, Mindy was right, he thought sadly. Jacey had not received all she deserved. Not nearly. But that could—and would—change. Starting today.

“Got a minute?” Jacey asked Rafferty from the study doorway.

Her timing could not have been more perfect. He'd been wanting to see her, too. “For you?” he returned with a grin. “Always.” He ushered her in and shut the door behind her.

Because she appeared to be there on business, he guided her to one of the chairs in front of his desk. Then he sat down next to her and turned his chair so they were facing each other. “What's up?”

She held her pen above the clipboard in her hand. “I'm taking requests for the Christmas Eve and Christmas Day menus. I want to make sure everyone gets at least one, if not all, of their favorite things.”

Rafferty wasn't surprised Jacey was going all out. She took her cooking very seriously. “Whatever you want to prepare is great.” She'd already done so much, for all of them….

Jacey searched his face. “Sure?”

Rafferty nodded as joy washed over him. If everything fell into place as he hoped it would, by this time next year they'd be a real family. He'd have a wife and child to come back to every night. “You've already made a gingerbread house. Assorted cookies….”
Done everything you could to bring me back to life and make all my dreams come true.

Jacey narrowed her eyes, more eager to please than ever. “There must be something you want,” she insisted.

Rafferty took the clipboard and pen from her, set them aside, and shifted her over onto his lap. “There is.” He tucked his fingers beneath her chin and stroked his thumbs across her cheeks. She let out a soft exhalation and he kissed her with the promise of the days and nights to come.

Taking both her hands in his, he gazed into her eyes and continued, “I'm giving all the ranch employees their Christmas gifts and bonuses on the twenty-fifth, but I have something for you today.”

Emotion glimmered in her pretty eyes. “Does this mean you're actually participating in Christmas?” she asked triumphantly.

Rafferty chuckled. “I think we both know you won that bet a long time ago,” he conceded. “So, yes, I am celebrating Christmas this year.”

Jacey's face lit up even more. “Your dad is going to be so happy.”

Rafferty released his hold on her reluctantly and moved behind his desk. Quickly, he booted up the Summit, Texas, real estate listings on his computer and motioned Jacey over. “There's something I want you to look at.” When she rounded the desk, he guided her into the chair and stood behind her.

Jacey's brow furrowed as she studied the screen. She swiveled to look up at him. “Why am I looking at a commercial building on Main Street?”

He turned her chair right back and pointed to a row of photos at the bottom of the computer screen. “Notice that it also has a three-room apartment on the second floor that comes with the lease.”

“Okay.” She still looked confused.

Rafferty came around the chair to sit on the edge of the desk, facing her. “For your kitchenware and cookbook boutique,” he explained.

A troubled look clouded her eyes. “I thought I explained. I don't have the money to start a business right now.”

Rafferty nodded. “But I do.”

 

J
ACEY STARED
at Rafferty, her heart thudding uncertainly in her chest. Call her a fool. But she had really been expecting him to do something over-the-top-romantic when it came to celebrating the holiday with her—like propose.

Instead, this…

“It's my Christmas gift to you,” Rafferty informed her. He reached into his center desk drawer and handed her an envelope.

Fingers trembling, she looked inside, saw the five figures typed on the personal check and wanted to sink through the floor.

“That'll cover the lease and utilities for one year, and startup inventory. I figure with the number of tourists that come through Summit, and the lack of other specialty shops in this part of Texas, you ought to do just fine. Especially if you add a mail-order component, the way they've done over at Callahan Mercantile and Feed.”

“You've given this a lot of thought,” she announced numbly, still feeling a little stunned at the swift way he was booting her and her daughter off the ranch and out of his life.

He appeared sincere. “I want you to get what you want out of life, Jacey. And not be stuck here indefinitely.”

That was one way to put it. She gave him a withering look, making no effort at all to hide her hurt over his actions. “So you're easing me out,” she concluded, abruptly recalling what the librarian had said.

Watch out for Rafferty Evans. He's left a string of broken hearts from here to Big Bend National Park. I dated him for two months, six years ago. I thought we were getting serious. Next thing I know, he's easing away from me, ever so kindly, the same way he eased away from all his other girlfriends.

It was Rafferty's turn to look confused—but no less determined to see his plan through. “I figured it was what you wanted. Even if you were too considerate to leave us in the lurch. But you don't need to worry about that,” he consoled her gallantly. “I had another talk with the chef that was supposed to come out for a trial run yesterday. He said if he could leave the ranch from Friday to Sunday every week he would consider working here temporarily.”

It galled her to think how easily he was planning to replace her. “How noble of him.”

Her sarcasm was lost on Rafferty.

“If he doesn't work out, we'll find someone to replace him ASAP, Jacey.”

This time she couldn't help it—she scoffed. “How noble of
you.
”

Rafferty's lips thinned. “I'm getting the idea you don't like my gift.”

Given what she had been planning to bestow on him…? The news that she was committing to the job for as long as they wanted and needed her at the ranch? Their presents to each other were so ironically mismatched it was almost funny. Or would have been, Jacey amended silently, if her heart hadn't ached so very badly.

Figuring she could at least hold on to her pride, Jacey bounded out of the desk chair, all self-reliant energy once again. “No problem,” she stated with an inner cheer she could not begin to feel. “Caitlin and I will be out of here on the twenty-sixth—early. And you can replace me right away.”

Rafferty caught her wrist before she could complete her escape and reeled her back. Her hip bumped the outside of his knee. “I'm not sure the building will be ready for occupancy by then.”

She loathed the way he was still sitting casually on the edge of his desk. But then, his life was not falling apart. Hers was. “I won't be staying,” she told him coolly. “I'm going to live with my sister in El Paso until I find another job.”

Rafferty blinked in shock. “What about us?”

What about them? It wasn't as if they were going to drag this out indefinitely, even if his lovemaking had made her feel like the most special woman in the world. Jacey shrugged. “Consider me eased out of your life,” she said sweetly.

“You're dumping me?” Rafferty asked incredulously.

Jacey folded her arms in front of her. “Consider us dumping each other,” she advised levelly, figuring this was the only way to take the high road. “That way, neither of us has to feel guilty.”

Rafferty's expression hardened. “This isn't what I want.”

Jacey leaned close enough to inhale the brisk, masculine scent of him. “Then what do you want?” she queried, unable to hide her resentment any longer. “Some sort of arrangement where you sneak into town to see me?”

Displeasure hardened the handsome features of his face. “I think we've done enough sneaking around,” he concluded. “Don't you?”

Bitterness filled her heart. Why did she never see this coming? When would she ever realize she was about to be excised from a man's life?

“You're right about that. Our sneaking-around days are over!” She marched to the door, yanked it open.

“Jacey…”

She paused in the door of the study, tears stinging her eyes. She held up a staying hand. “You're getting what you want, Rafferty,” she told him hoarsely. “Consider my leaving my Christmas gift to you.”

Without waiting for a response, she turned around and stormed out.

 

“B
OSS, WE GOT SOMETHING
to say to you.”

Rafferty looked up from the horse he was saddling. If ever there was a time when he didn't need an employee revolt, it was now. But it looked as if he was about to have one anyway.

“We just found out you're letting Jacey go,” Stretch said unhappily.

That was a gross misstatement. “I didn't let her go. She quit.”

“Only because you forced her to,” Curly countered, “by bringing in some other dude that isn't even willing to cook on weekends, like she is.”

“Without her, we're going to go back to starving,” Hoss complained.

Rafferty tightened the cinches around his mount's belly. “I hardly think that will be the case,” he said with a great deal more ease than he felt.

“Well, we sure won't be happy,” Red growled.

Rafferty adjusted the reins, wishing he were already out on the range, riding hell for leather. “And you think I will be?”

Gabby folded his arms. “If you were unhappy, you would do something about it.”

“Yeah,” Stretch concurred. “We've done our part by helping her out as much as possible and getting her a really great Christmas gift.”

Rafferty had seen what the present was. They had gone all out. Their gift to Jacey showed a lot of thought, as well as genuine concern for her well-being. “She's really going to like that,” he said sincerely, willing to give praise where it was due.

“The only thing around here she doesn't like, it would seem, is you, boss,” Curly said, scowling.

“We need you to fix this!” Hoss implored.

“Make her stay!” Red pleaded.

Stretch threw up his hands. “Help her understand how much she has changed things around here!”

If Rafferty could…

He hardened his heart against further hurt and disappointment. Forced himself to be reasonable, even if it hurt. “I'm not forcing a city girl to stay on this ranch, fellas. I've already done that, as you may recall. It didn't work out.”

“Jacey is no Angelica,” Gabby retorted. “No disrespect…”

“None taken. And I know that.” Jacey was everything his late wife hadn't been. Loving. Tender. Compassionate. Sensitive. Generous to a fault. The other half of his soul…

“She loves it here.” Stretch looked as if he was about to cry.

Rafferty knew how that felt, too.

“She loves us,” Curly continued.

She just doesn't love me, Rafferty thought on an inward sigh, not sure how he had landed here when he'd thought he finally had everything, or was about to.

Some of his confusion must have showed, because the next thing Rafferty knew, the cowboys were all commiserating with him, trying to help, rather than simply accuse. “Look, boss, all we know is that everything was fine until she went off to talk to you, and then it wasn't fine anymore, so you must have done something.”

He'd never been more generous—and selfless—in his life. Did Jacey think he wanted her to leave? That he wanted to have to drive all the way into town to so much as catch a glimpse of her? Yet he'd made that sacrifice so all her dreams could come true. He shook his head in rueful regret. “All I did was try to give her a Christmas gift. Something I thought she wanted.”

“Well, she must not have wanted it,” Gabby declared.

No kidding. Rafferty thought with heartfelt regret.

“Give her something else,” Hoss urged.

“Something better,” Red added.

“The kind of thing all women want,” Curly persuaded.

“First of all, Jacey isn't ‘all women',” Rafferty lectured the cowboys. She was one of a kind. The most special, incredible woman he had ever met in his entire life.

Stretch threw up his hands. “Then give her something she wants!”

That was the hell of it, Rafferty thought, even more dejected. He hadn't a clue what that might be.

 

“T
HANKS FOR AGREEING
to go to the grocery store with me,” Jacey told Eli as they headed for town in one of the ranch pickup trucks, with Caitlin in her car seat in the rear passenger seat. She was going to need help getting all the ingredients she would need to cook for the cowboys the next two days.

“No problem. Although I would have thought this was something you would want to do to with Rafferty.”

Not anymore, Jacey thought furiously, aware she had never felt more disillusioned and hurt than she did at that moment.

“Is something going on between the two of you?” Eli asked. “Did you quarrel?”