1 Hot Scheming Mess (19 page)

Madison shrugged her shoulders. “No.”
Damn it.
She knew he had a point. “Thank you for being so nice to my mother. And although you really pissed me off, I’m sorry for throwing your clothes out the window. But you weren’t naked. I gave you my fairy godmother costume, didn’t I?”

Suffocated laugher could be heard from Daniel.

Madison continued with ExBoy, “And let me ask you this. Do I look like the kind of girl who can’t get any action?”

ExBoy’s face remained stoic, while Daniel and Dewey shook their heads, a hard no.

She continued, “Do I look like I’m afraid of your penis?”

The sound of chairs falling over accompanied the sound of two men giggling like little girls on the floor.

ExBoy leaned into her and said, “I didn’t mean that literally. It was just sex talk. I thought you would like it.”

Madison blinked. “It was?” He nodded.

“Well,” she said, “that was dumb.” She crossed her arms and looked at the floor.

“Sex talk usually is,” said ExBoy.

Daniel was laughing full out by this point, but Madison remembered what Spenser had told her, so she said, “Keep it up back there, Tasty Waisty!”

Daniel abruptly stopped, cleared his throat, and said, “You two really should take this outside.”

Chapter Nineteen

ExBoy walked with her out to the parking lot. As they approached her car, she noticed the lamppost she parked under had a shoe hanging from it, the shoelace having tangled itself around the pole when someone had thrown it up there. It looked lonely and pointless hanging there all by itself.

The night breeze in the parking lot was gentle but welcome. Temperatures were only a bit cooler now, not providing as much relief as everyone would have liked.

The night air carried music from a nearby club with the bass rhythms easiest to hear. People mixed it up in this part of town. Jocks from the UW, geeks from software or Internet companies, and those in their punk finery mingled as they went in and out of the different colored doors at the various clubs up and down the street.

Most businesses in this district threw the doors open in the hot summertime, and the patrons treated it like one big block party on a busy night. But it was slow tonight. Maybe the heat had taken its toll. Madison suspected the places with air-conditioning were doing unusually brisk business right now. That included movie theaters and grocery stores. Late night grocery shopping was not uncommon in a neighborhood where so many people made their living in the arts. Or maybe the usual crowds were mixing with the hipsters tonight by hitting the air conditioned higher end cocktail bars in heavier numbers than usual, leaving places like Sound Beating a little empty. Even in normal weather, Sound Beating needed occasional shows like Fight Cabaret to keep them coming in, keep them packed, and remind the patrons that Sound Beating was still cool, still relevant, even though the grunge music era was far behind in the rearview mirror.

As they walked, Madison said, “My life is a mess right now.” Remembering the tag at Robot Moon, she added, “Hot and scheming.”

ExBoy said, “Well, just so you know, I’m not running back and forth to give reports on you to your mom. She wanted you to live somewhere safe. That’s all it was ever about.”

They stopped at Madison’s car, as he added, “You’re in the apartment so I’m supposed to be done. I was supposed to go away by now. That’s why I left Fight Cabaret last night. You said your mom was going to be there. I couldn’t let her see me with you.”

“Oh, boy,” she closed her eyes with a pained expression. “I told her I had a boyfriend named ExBoy.” She rubbed her face. “I thought she’d be happy but she got upset.”

ExBoy nodded in an exaggerated fashion. “Great.” He turned, looking around the parking lot, then said, “Well, they didn’t break my legs. That’s something.”

“But then,” Madison continued, “she apologized. She seemed to accept it even though she didn’t like it.”

“You lie a lot about your love life, don’t you?” He turned, looking at her. “Why don’t you just get one?”

“Easy for you to say, you could get a girl anytime you want. I’m picky.”

“
Easy?
You think it’s easy trying to see you?”

“So why do you bother?” asked Madison.

“I’m picky, too.”

Laughter and cigarette smoke caught their attention as a few club patrons walked past, switching from one venue to another.

“For the record? I haven’t decided about you yet,” said Madison.

ExBoy faced her. “So what about the moony-eyed idiot at your door? Being picky about him, too?”

Madison opened her purse, searching for her car keys. “Leave him out of it.”

“Why? What’s so special about him?”

She unlocked her car door and opened it. “He got caught up in my problem, is all.”

“Is this another lie about your love life?” he asked.

Standing at the open car door, she whirled around and faced him.

He said, “But instead of pretending you have one, now you’re pretending you don’t?

“No.”

“Are you with him?”

“No.”

“Do you wish you were?”

Madison took a long time answering. Her voice subdued, she said, “Maybe. I don’t know.”

“Just do me a favor. Throw him out naked someday, and tell me how he reacts.”

“You’re not going to get over that, are you?”

He took her arm, gently pulling her toward him as he closed her car door, saying, “It was a first, I’ll give you that. You have any idea how much grief I put up with for you? And you still haven’t decided about me?”

“Something’s still wrong,” she said. “You said you were being nice to my mother, and you had me going at first. But you told me about that apartment when I first met you. You had no incentive yet to be nice to my mother.”

“Oh, yes I did,” he said with a shaky laugh. “I didn’t say
why
I was being nice to her.”

Madison stared at him. “You were in big trouble weren’t you?” she said. “Something she could fix for you if you did her a favor. Are you going to tell me what she has over you?”

“No. Are you going to tell me what’s going on with a metal box and someone breaking into your car?”

“No.”

She looked back up at the shoe hanging from the lamppost, tangled and swaying in the breeze. She said, “We never had a chance, did we?”

“We weren’t supposed to,” he said quietly. “I had strict orders not to get any ideas about you.”

“I could have sworn you had an idea or two.”

“I had a lot of ideas.”

“We both did,” she said with a soft smile. “At least now I understand why I could never get to know you.”

“We
have
gotten to know each other.”

Across the street a small group of lonely revelers tried to outdo each other in making rowdy party screams into the night air.

“No, you got to know
me.
All I know about you is that you’re an artist, but I’ve never seen your work. And you write, but if Daniel hadn’t mentioned that you have a book coming out, I never would’ve known.” It was hard to read his expression because he kept looking at the ground.

Madison said, “I don’t know where you’re from, I don’t know about your family, I don’t even know where you live. I can’t get past the pretty party boy who wants to have a good time.”

ExBoy turned his face back to her and studied her for a moment, then stepped closer, making her lean into her car, his face close to hers. The metal touching her backside was still warm from the hot day. His blue eyes with lashes and intense brows the shade of dark honey had always promised pleasure, but those eyes also promised trouble. She was ready for trouble, and overdue for pleasure, but she didn’t dare give in to it. Not yet. She needed answers. His face came closer.

“ExBoy, I can’t. I have to ask you…”

He looked at her, sheepish. “You think I’m pretty, huh?”

“A little too pretty for your own good, yeah,” she said. “Listen, I need to know…”

“Well, how much pretty is good?”

“Put it this way. Most women don’t want to have to compete with their boyfriend’s good looks.”

“That would never be a problem for you,” he said.

“Flatterer.”

“Did it work?”

“No.”

“You don’t want to jump in bed with me now?”

“I didn’t say that, you big tease.”

“Me? I’m the big tease? Who got me naked tonight and threw me out?”

“Who got frisked tonight in the parking lot?”

He stopped. “You saw that?”

She nodded.

He backed up, exasperated, his face taking on a hard look. “This will always be in the way, won’t it? Your mom sent a few assholes to give me a hard time, that’s all. They didn’t even have my name right.” He looked up into the night sky over the city. “You know, it’s not supposed to be this hard. Either you want to be with me or you don’t. It’s not up to her, it’s up to you.”

“Did they show you ID?”

“Of course. FBI. That’s how I knew they were from her.”

“What exactly did they say?”

“They said they were from headquarters, flashed their badges, and asked me if I knew Madison Cruz. I made up a random name of a resident that I had been visiting and pointed to the wrong window.”

“Headquarters…” Her breath caught. FBI Headquarters were located in Washington, DC. Grandpa went to DC to talk to FBI Headquarters?
Why?

ExBoy looked back at her. “I’m wondering if there’s any point in continuing here. Whatever the issues are, we can’t seem to get our act together.”

“I don’t know what to tell you. Everything’s so…”

The
Jaws
music started playing. Madison shoved her phone further into her purse, trying to muffle it but it could still be heard, coloring her thoughts.

“I’m not going to lie to you,” she said. “I don’t know what to think. I want you, but I’m not sure how I feel about you. I have other things demanding my attention right now.

“Fine. I’m getting out of the way,” he said. “Before I feel any stupider than I already do.”

The
Jaws
music stopped playing, meaning Ann’s call was going to voicemail.

ExBoy repeated, “It’s not supposed to be this hard.” He took her head in his hands and kissed her forehead. “I give up,” he said. He put his hands in the air and said, “I’m done.” He walked backward a few steps before he turned and walked away.

Watching him leave, she heard one last party scream from across the street as the tiny group made their way down the sidewalk. The tangled shoe continued to sway in the breeze, and Madison wondered if it would ever untangle itself and drop.

She stood alone next to her car in a mostly empty parking lot. She felt like crying but there were no tears. One disappointment after another was only serving to make her feel numb. Well, she was learning not to trust her feelings, so being numb came in kind of handy. And since she was numb, now seemed as good a time as any to hear her mother’s voicemail. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much.

She called up her voicemail to hear whatever message that Ann had left for her. Ann’s voice came on saying, “I owe you an explanation for so much. There’s too much that you don’t know. It wasn’t right for me to hold it back for so long, but I couldn’t face it. We will have to disagree with each other about who cut off whom, but you should at least know that you were no accident. I set out to get pregnant. I wanted a baby. I always felt that I didn’t belong, and I thought a baby would love me and give me what I thought was missing in my life. I had something to prove.” A rueful chuckle escaped Ann. “I was young and stupid and didn’t know that babies are the ones who need loving. When you took to your grandmother more than to me…” Her voice stopped for a few seconds as she inhaled and exhaled slow and strong, “I was too young, Madison. I had no idea what I was doing, and my mother was there to salvage my mistake. So I…”
(Beeep)
The phone’s voicemail time had run out, but Ann hadn’t called back to try to continue what she was going to say.

This news hit Madison in an unexpected way. In spite of her sadness, her fatigue, and the emotional numbness, a part of her came alive. She may have issues that needed working out with her mother, but it was worth the fight.

She began to have pleasant thoughts of going home to her pillow when she finally realized a small dark car had been parked across the street this whole time, the nighttime streetlights making hard shadows of its occupants. But based on the silhouettes of their heads they seemed to be looking her way. Feeling stupid for feeling paranoid, she decided to go back inside Sound Beating and wait for that car to be gone. She had big strong friends inside the bar. She would be safe in there.

She walked away from her car, out of the parking lot, and onto the sidewalk as another group of partiers came by. Four guys feeling too much of their drinking were laughing at everything each other said. The door to Sound Beating was a few feet away.

As Madison passed by, their attention to her derriere caused them to turn around with appreciative stares and whoops, just as Daniel was walking out of Sound Beating’s door. Relieved, Madison was glad to see him and was about to say as much when a hand came down heavy on her shoulder. She turned around as the drunk young man slurred, “Excuse me, but my friend wants to know your name.”

Daniel stepped up, casual, and pushed the hand off of Madison’s shoulder, saying, “Move along dude, she’s with me right now.”

The young man lost his balance, stumbling toward Madison, saying, “Sorry.”

Daniel put his hands out to catch the young man and steady him on his feet, but one of his friends, a black gauge in his earlobe, slurred, “Hey! What are you doing?” while another friend threw down the cigarette he’d been smoking.

“Git yer fucking hands off my friend,” said the fourth drunk guy in a faded orange t-shirt, taking a swing at Daniel.

Still in good spirits, Daniel easily caught it and used it to turn the guy around, pushing him away from Madison, who was backing up, the heels of her feet bumping into the wall behind her. Cigarette guy and gauge guy ran at Daniel in a tangle of arms, cigarette guy and Daniel going down to the ground. At the same time the faded orange t-shirt guy grabbed Madison’s arm, pulling her into his face, his beer breath slurring, “What’s wrong with you people?”