Willow Pond (27 page)

***

Laura stared at the engraved invitation she held in her hand.

Miss Virginia Kingsley

cordially requests your attendance

at the opening of her new supper club,

KINGSLEY’S

Saturday September 17, 1931 at 8:00 PM

Formal attire required.

Virginia had added a little note that read, “I can’t wait to see you. I hope you and Rachel are both well.”

Could she possibly go? If she did, she’d have to leave Rachel. The baby would be barely four months old, and the thought of leaving her made Laura’s heart race. She had once left Todd, too. And had never seen him again. She knew Mrs. Nickerson would take good care of Rachel, but still …

For days she couldn’t decide what to do. One morning she found Mrs. Nickerson in the kitchen preparing Rachel’s bottle. She sat at the table, folded her arms in front of her and sighed.

“What’s the matter, Laura? You’ve had something on your mind for days. What is it?”

Laura handed her the invitation and watched Mrs. Nickerson’s expression as she read it. “What’s the problem? You’ll have a wonderful time. I’ve heard your aunt knows how to throw a great party.”

“Yes, she does, but I can’t go.”

“Why not?”

“You know why. I can’t leave Rachel. The last time I left my baby …”

Mrs. Nickerson sat beside her and took her hand. “Laura, don’t do this to yourself. You’re a good mother. You’re a good mother to Rachel and you’re a good mother to Todd. And you will be again when he comes home.”

Laura gazed at Mrs. Nickerson and a little smile played at the corners of her lips. “Do you really believe he’s going to come home, Iris? I try to hang onto that, but sometimes it’s so hard. It’s been a long time.”

Mrs. Nickerson shook her head decisively. “I don’t believe he’s going to come home. I know he is.”

Laura took the nanny’s hand. “Thank you.”

“Now you go to your aunt’s party and have a wonderful time. That little angel asleep in the nursery will be safe, I promise you. I won’t let her out of my sight, and I won’t let anyone else near her, either.”

Chapter Fifty-One

Kingsley’s opened in London on September 17
^th
, 1931. At a quarter to nine, a white Rolls Royce pulled up to the curb. Laura stepped out and made her way into the club.

Once inside, she slipped out of her full-length ermine mink coat and looked around. Two of Kingsley’s walls were painted white, and the other two were black. The dance floor was black and white marble and the tables and chairs alternated in black and white. The decorator had even gone so far as to ensure the black tables had white accessories and vice versa.

Every eye went to Laura. Her strapless red velvet evening gown was a sharp contrast to the stark decor of the club, and the lights shone on the curve of her golden chignon, sparking off the tasteful diamond earrings and matching pendant hanging around her slender neck.

All Laura saw was Erich. Their eyes met and in that second there was no one in the room but the two of them. She wanted more than anything to be alone with him, just to see him, talk to him, touch him. Then his beautiful young wife said something and he looked away from Laura. She’d known Erich had gotten married, but … Seeing them together made her feel ill with regret. She’d lost him forever, and it was her own fault for being so stupid, for refusing to see him for so long. What a fool she had been. A stubborn, stupid fool.

The band began to play “Night and Day” and Erich got up to dance with his wife. Laura couldn’t take her eyes off them. Every so often Erich glanced over at Laura, squeezing anguish through her heart. After three dances, the couple went back to their table and Virginia appeared, pouring champagne for herself and Laura.

“It’s wonderful to see you, Laura,” Virginia said. She followed Laura’s gaze and took a deep breath, then let the air out slowly. “Why don’t you go over and say something to him? It’s obvious he still has feelings for you.”

“Aunt Virginia, he’s a married man, and I know it’s my fault he married her. I’ve lost him, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

“Oh, yes there is. You could tell him about Rachel. Don’t you think that would make a difference to him?”

Laura studied her aunt. “I’m curious. What is he doing here?”

“He’s working in London and I—”

“You did this on purpose, didn’t you? You did it again.” Laura shook her head. “You planned for the two of us to be here so we could reunite. Well, I’m telling you it isn’t going to work.”

Virginia grinned. “We’ll see about that. Speaking of which, did you bring any pictures of the baby?”

Laura nodded and handed her two photographs of five-month-old Rachel.

Virginia smiled fondly at the pictures. “She looks just like him, Laura. Especially her eyes. They’re so blue. You won’t be able to keep the secret from him much longer. As soon as he sees her, he’ll know. Everyone will know.”

Laura glanced over at Erich. “Rachel also has a lot of Todd’s sweetness.”

“Too bad you didn’t bring her with you,” Virginia said, grinning. “I have gifts for her.”

Laura chuckled. “I bet you do. I just thought she’d be better off at home with Mrs. Nickerson, though I’ve been terribly nervous about leaving her. I call home two or three times a day just to check that she’s okay.”

The film director, Richard Hamilton, who had worked with Phillip in the past, came by her table and greeted her with a kiss. Laura turned and noticed Erich’s wife, Jenny, walking toward their table. Erich was right behind his wife, his blue eyes focused on Laura. Laura couldn’t look away. Her heart raced. Jenny chatted happily with Richard, who had also worked with her father. She was oblivious to her husband’s distracted gaze.

“You don’t mind if I dance with your wife, do you, Erich?” Richard asked.

“Oh, no. Go ahead.”

Jenny and Richard headed for the dance floor. A moment later Erich came toward Laura and she rose from her chair as if in a dream. He took her hand and without a word he led her to the dance floor.

***

Being in each other’s arms seemed like the most natural thing in the world. By the time the dance ended they’d agreed to meet in the street just outside her hotel later that evening.

When the time came, they sat in his car, gazing at each other.

When Erich finally spoke, his voice was harsh with regret. “I can’t do this to my wife. It isn’t right.”

“Do you love Jenny?”

At the mention of her name, Erich closed his eyes, searching his emotions. Did he love her? No. But he had married her with the intention of making a life with her. Maybe he had even thought he would learn to love her. He did care about her. How could he do this to her? He hated himself for it. And it only felt worse when Erich remembered the shabby way his father had treated his mother. It was important that he not hurt Jenny, but that seemed unavoidable.

He looked at Laura, who was watching him closely. As he gazed into her intense green eyes he thought he saw something new. Something had changed in her life and it was as if she carried whatever it was with her. Whatever it was, he was drawn even more to her now. He could never leave her again. He couldn’t even be separated from her.

He hung his head. “Love her? No, I never have. I never should have married her. It was wrong. I just needed … Oh, I don’t know what I needed. Truth is, I’ve never stopped loving you.”

“I can’t be the cause of your marriage ending. You have to be sure.”

“I am sure. I may never forgive myself for breaking Jenny’s heart, but I’m sure about you and me. I’ve always been sure.”

They headed south to Kent, checked into the White Lion Inn and spent the next five days holding hands, bathing together, feeding each other, and sleeping in a tangle of arms and legs. They made love frantically at first, then moved more slowly, but with no less urgency, as if their hunger for each other would never be satisfied.

Laura tried a few times to talk about Jenny, about what they were going to do, but Erich refused to discuss it. He put his finger to her lips as he’d done that first time on the boat, and wiped away her tears until she gave herself up to the joy of loving and being loved.

On the second night, Laura couldn’t sleep. Erich was curled up next to her, sleeping soundly with a look of utter contentment on his face. She didn’t think she had ever seen him as happy as he had been that day. Laura didn’t feel as light with happiness, weighted down as she was beneath a heavy secret. A secret with golden hair and blue eyes like her father’s. And Laura was afraid that when she told him, he would hate her.

Rachel was Erich’s child, his flesh and blood, yet he didn’t even know she existed. What would he say if she told him about her? Would he be filled with joy or would he lash out at her? He had every right to be angry, but if he left her, Laura would be destroyed.

She sat up in bed, wide awake. It would be impossible for her to sleep tonight. She went into the small sitting room and looked out the window, staring at the stars. Laura turned her arguments over in her mind, trying to make excuses for her behavior, but it was no good. No matter how hard she tried, Laura knew she was wrong. She had made a mistake in not telling Erich about Rachel. Now she had to do what she could to make it up to him. She was going to have to tell him about his daughter.

The next day the couple took a leisurely walk down one of the country roads, enjoying the bright, sunny weather. Erich picked a bunch of daisies and tucked one of the flowers into her blonde ponytail. But Laura was distracted. She couldn’t carry the guilt any longer. She squeezed his hand and stopped walking.

“I have something to tell you.”

He frowned. “What is it?”

“Oh, God, Erich, I don’t know how to tell you this.” She chewed on her lower lip, hoping for courage. “All right. I’ll just say it. You and I have a baby, a little girl named Rachel. She’s five months old.”

His jaw dropped. “What? We have …” He goggled at her, speechless. Then his cheeks flushed with anger. “What are you telling me?”

“I was pregnant when you and I split up, but I didn’t know it. I didn’t go running back to you because, well, because I didn’t want you to come back out of duty. I wanted you to … Oh, never mind. I just couldn’t tell you. Oh, Erich. Please try to understand.”

He walked a few feet away and stood by a small pond. Picking up a couple of stones, he tossed them into widening circles in the water. Laura wrung her hands as she watched, desperate for him to say something.

He didn’t turn to look at her. “Where is she?” he asked quietly.

“She’s in New York with Mrs. Nickerson. I hated to leave her, but she’s too young to make such a long trip.”

“Do you have any pictures of her?”

She had one in the pocket of her dress. She’d put it there that morning, knowing he would ask. For several minutes he stared at the picture and said nothing. Then he took a deep breath and any sort of anger melted away.

“My God. She’s so beautiful,” he said. “I’ve never seen anything so beautiful.”

Laura took a cautious step toward him. “She looks just like you,” she said. “Even Virginia thinks so.”

He spun to face her. “I have to see her, Laura. I’ll be back in New York next week. My God. I have a daughter. It’s killing me that I can’t see her this minute.”

“So …” she said carefully. “So you don’t hate me?”

He laid his warm palm against her cheek and she leaned into it, closing her eyes with relief. “I could never hate you, Laura. Never. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was confused. You have to tell me this. Why did you give up on us even after you knew about the baby?”

She sighed. “Maybe it wasn’t you. Maybe it was me. Todd had been kidnapped, my marriage was over, then you came along. It was all too much.”

“Then can I assume you’ve forgiven me for what I said about Virginia?”

“I don’t know. She has, and she’s told me I should. I guess she’s pretty open to you these days. Otherwise, why would she have invited you to the opening of her new club? Unless …”

Erich smiled. “Unless what?”

“Unless she knew exactly what she was doing. She wanted us to see each other because she knew what would happen.” Laura looked deeply into his blue eyes and saw herself reflected in them. “What about your wife? I hate to think of anyone being hurt this way. She seems so nice and genuine. That’s a huge accomplishment, considering her background.”

The corner of his mouth curled in a gentle smile. “Yes, Jenny’s terrific. A lot of her friends and family think I married her for her money - or, should I say, her father’s money, but I didn’t. I never loved her the way I love you, but I did care for her. I thought that was enough. We wanted the same thing: a home, children, but now …”

She moved closer, planting a soft, gentle kiss on his lips. “At least it wasn’t the disaster my marriage to Phillip was.”

Chapter Fifty-Two

Five days later Erich dropped Laura off at the Mayfair Hotel and continued on to the townhouse he and Jenny rented on Oakley Street, in Chelsea. Jenny felt at home among the mink-coated women walking poodles in Cheyne Park; Erich felt like a man with two left feet. The place was far too expensive for him to afford. The only reason they were living there was the New York Herald Tribune was footing the bill. Erich missed New York and was glad his London assignment would be over in another month.

He drove slowly, feeling horrible. Jenny deserved a reasonable explanation, and he didn’t have one for her. Was their marriage over? He pulled in the driveway, walked through the back door and found her sitting at the kitchen table, staring at a cup of tea.

“You’re back,” Jenny said, her voice flat.

He sat across the table from her but didn’t say anything.

“Aren’t you going to talk to me?” she said, her tone lowered to a vicious whisper.

He swallowed. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I think you’d better come up with something.”