When You're Ready (22 page)

“Scout…Scout—” she stammered my name making it sounds like the most important word in the entire world. “I’m…” Nola’s legs started to quake and she bit her lip trying to tamp down her scream, “I’m…”

“It’s okay, baby,” I whispered in her ear, continuing to stroke her with my fingers as her whole body convulsed. She was squeezing my neck so hard it felt like she was holding on for dear life. I knew she was coming, but she was still trying to fight the feeling. “Let it go, baby. It’s okay. Let it go.”

Nola’s body jerked and she cried out again, loosening her grip on my neck. I covered her lips, eyes, collarbone, and face in kisses while she recovered. I was so hard, I wanted to dive inside and fuck her until we were both tired and raw, but I didn’t want to hurt Nola. I reminded myself she was my girl now, she wasn’t going anywhere, and we had time.

I propped myself up on my elbow and watched her. When Nola finally opened her eyes, she smiled up at me and I placed a peck on her nose.

“You okay?”

She nodded. “Yeah. That was, ” her cheeks turned red, “amazing.”

I smiled and kissed her again. “Good, I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

“But…”

“But what?”

“What about you?” she asked, tracing one of the tattoos on my arms and further stoking the fire I was trying to keep in check.

“What about me?”

“You didn’t get to,
you know
,” she said, pointing toward my bulge. “We didn’t have sex.”

“I know, but this was all about you, baby. I wanted to make sure you were taken care of first.”

“But…” she pulled me in for another kiss. “I thought this was all about
us
?”

“Yeah, but I wanted to make sure you were—“

Nola put a finger to my lips shutting me up.  “Scout…” Before I could answer she slid her hand under my shirt and started taking it off.

I looked down at her. “You sure?”

Nola nodded and tugged on my pants. “It’s not fair.”

“What’s not, baby?”

“I’m naked and you have on all these clothes.”

I chuckled while she climbed on top of me and slid off my pants and boxers. Nola ran her hands up my legs, but paused when she got to a group of small scars right above my knee.

“Motorcycle accident?”

I swallowed. I didn’t know if I should tell the truth or make something up. I didn’t want to fuck up the mood by talking about my parents’ abuse, but I didn’t want to lie to Nola either.

“No…cigarette burns….from my parents.” I glanced down to see Nola’s reaction. Instead of being repulsed or turned off, she kissed them.

“Anymore?”

I pointed to old wounds on my legs, stomach, and chest and Nola marked each spot with her lips before making her way back to my mouth.

“I’m sorry that happened to you, Scout.”

“It’s okay,” I said, trying not to cry like a fucking child.

“It’s not okay. What they did was wrong and totally not your fault.” She paused to kiss me again. “But you know what? You’re amazing. They tried to break you, Scout, and you’re freaking amazing!”

I didn’t know how to react to Nola’s words they were almost too much for me to handle. In my head I knew the way my parents treated me wasn’t my fault, but my heart was a different story. I’d spent so many years closed off and suspicious that love even existed, it
was
amazing we were here, together.

I sat up and Nola was in my lap. I kissed her hard, then rested my forehead against hers.

“Nola, I…” I hesitated, afraid to say the words to a woman for the very first time. “I…I’m glad I met you, baby. It’s like fate or something. Seriously. I never thought I could meet anybody like you. I mean, I never thought it was even possible for me to fall…” I stopped when Nola touched my face and I realized she’d wiped away a tear. “I love you, baby. I love you so damn much, Nola.”

She smiled so brightly I thought my heart stopped beating and I died. I mean, how else could I explain feeling so incredible?

Nola hugged me, and then whispered into my neck, “I love you too.”

I could have cried, well, more than I already had. Nola loved me. She loved
me
—not because I was rich or handsome or had a nice car or some other bullshit women normally liked about me. But she loved
me
, fucked up parents, scars and all. How the hell did I get so lucky?

“Um, Scout?” Nola said, knocking me out of my sappy thoughts.

“Yes, baby?”

“I think it’s time.”

“Time for what?”

“To consummate this relationship,” she said, giggling. “Unless you changed your mind, that is.”

I flipped her over and claimed my spot on top, then crashed my lips into hers.

“What do you think?”

“I think you were right,” she said, tracing my lips with her finger. “We’re not leaving this bed for the foreseeable future.”

“What about your paper?”

“It can wait, but this,” she touched my dick, which seemed to grow even bigger, “will not.”

I kissed her hard, thrusting my tongue into her mouth. “You’re goddamned right.”

Being with Nola made me feel like I had died and gone straight to heaven, it was that fucking mind-blowing and I never wanted it to end.

23
Nola

It was all a dream. Scout and me, zooming down the coast in his Mustang and then tumbling into the house to make love for
hours
. It just didn’t seem real, or possible, or even probable for a girl who was once so scared to give herself away to a man. Either it was all a dream or I’d somehow been transported into a movie, because things like this just didn’t happen in real life. Or so I thought.

The sunlight outside Scout’s massive windows had long since dimmed by the time I’d finally recovered from our marathon sex session. There was no other way to describe it. After he kissed me
down there
and made me come for what felt like
years
, Scout plunged into me, stroking me gently at first until I begged him to go deeper, harder, faster.

Please, please, please.
I moaned over and over again, until Scout had no choice but to give me what I craved—and ohmygod—I wasn’t ready for the sensations he ignited all over my body. I was so hot, so completely ablaze, it felt like I would catch fire every time he entered me. As a matter of fact, I waited—and begged—for it to happen.

I surprised myself; my voice so urgent and wanton, asking Scout to fuck me—yes,
fuck me—
like I’d done it a million times before, like this wasn’t the first time I’d ever uttered the words. And he gladly obliged, molding me into sensuous positions that always made me feel him in a new and surprising way. By the time we were done, my whole body hummed his praises, and all we could do was collapse into a deep and wondrous sleep.

God knows I didn’t want to get up and pull away from the warmth of Scout’s arms, but I had work to do. No matter how good it felt to press myself into his hard body, my essay for Professor St. James’ class wouldn’t write itself.

I tiptoed to the closet, pulled on one of Scout’s t-shirts, then grabbed my backpack and headed downstairs, no need to disturb us both. I set up my laptop and notebook on the breakfast bar and got to work, Googling information about the intersection of feminism and popular culture. After about an hour, my stomach started to growl and I remembered that I hadn’t eaten all day. Scout had the folks at Malibu Farm wrap up our food, so we didn’t get a chance to actually eat. I guess we were too busy consuming each other’s bodies to care about our appetites. But as I sat there trying to concentrate on my research, my belly suddenly had other plans.

I rummaged through the fridge looking for my uneaten breakfast, but spotted it on the floor near the front door, still in the monogramed bag. My food had been sitting there for hours, but I hoped it was still good enough to eat. When I opened the box and took a whiff, I knew it was a lost cause.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Scout chuckled, grabbing the bag out of my hand and taking it to the trash. He had pulled on a pair of basketball shorts that sat so low on his hips that I got damp just looking at him.
Sexy
. Scout Clayborne was so damn sexy I thought I might go up in flames once again.

“Hungry?”

“What gave it away?” I swallowed, trying not to let my eyes drop to his manhood again.

“The fact that you even considered eating those rancid pancakes was a huge clue.”

I rolled my eyes and smiled. “Well, maybe if you had something other than Muscle Milk in your fridge, I wouldn’t have to chance it.” I shook my head and sucked my teeth. “My boyfriend is
such
a jock.”

Scout grabbed my t-shirt, tugging me closer. “Say that again.”

“What? You’re a big ol’ jock who loves working out and chugging nasty protein shakes?” I teased.

“Nope,” he kissed me on the lips, “the other part.”

I stared up at him, confused. “About being my boyfriend?”

He nodded, but didn’t say a word. Scout’s face was unreadable, so like most inexperienced girls I started to freak the hell out. I mean, even though Scout said he loved me he had never actually said he was my boyfriend, or anything other than my friend. And while I’d never been in a relationship before, I’d overheard enough conversations to know that sometimes men got spooked when the women they were dating pressed for a label. I suddenly had the sinking feeling I’d blurted out the wrong thing.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” I said, trying to backtrack. “What I meant was—“

Scout covered my mouth with his, causing me to swallow the rest of my words. His tongue slipped past my lips, and his hands tugged on the waistband of my panties, but he didn’t try to touch the aching spot between my thighs. When he pulled away, I was both exhilarated by his kiss and annoyed he didn’t take it further.

“Say it again,” he demanded, staring into my eyes.

“You’re my boyfriend,” I said, my legs still wobbly from our kiss.

“And do you know what that means?”

I shook my head no.

“It means you’re mine, Nola.” He tipped my chin up and placed a peck on my lips. “And I’m yours.” Scout’s brown eyes looked so intense I knew he was serious. I was so transfixed by his words, Scout could have told me the moon was purple and I would have believed him.

“We belong to each other,” he said, his fingers still caressing my face. “Nothing and nobody can come between us, okay? Not our friends, our families, nobody. You understand?”

I nodded, completely turned on by his declaration.

“If I catch another guy trying to move in on my territory, so help me God, I will fuck him up.”

I giggled at Scout’s possessiveness. He certainly looked like he
could
mess somebody up, but I’d never gotten that vibe from him; he’d been nothing but a gentleman.  Still, I played along.

“And what if another girl tries to catch your eye?”

“She won’t even have a chance. If her name isn’t Nola Chambers, she doesn’t fucking exist.”

“So…I’m stuck with you, huh?”

Scout kissed me again. “Damn right.”

Normally I would have scoffed at the idea of
belonging
to a man, I fancied myself sort of a feminist after all. But for some reason, I felt Scout wouldn’t try to control me. I hoped his idea of belonging was about dedication and love, not domination and ownership. Either way, I was willing to find out.

Just when I was about to ask Scout to explain what “belong” meant to him, my stomach rumbled so loudly it brought our tender moment to an abrupt end.

“Damn girl,” Scout chuckled. “You sound like you haven’t eaten in days. I’m going to order a pizza so you can get back to work, okay?”

I rested my head against his chest and planted my lips on his skin. “Okay.”

“And then I’m writing you a check.”

I looked up at him, surprised. “A check?”

“For school. I don’t want you to have to stress out about it anymore. Will $20,000 cover it?”

The number knocked me off balance and I stumbled backward. Scout had casually thrown out the amount—
twenty thousand dollars—
like it was nothing at all, like it was twenty bucks instead of more money than I’d ever had at once.

Doubt quickly flooded my brain and I began to wonder what the hell had I gotten myself into. I loved Scout, but could I really take
thousands
of dollars from a man? My mother would have leapt at the money, but I was not anything like my mother. I didn’t use men to foot the bill; I didn’t leave my future in anyone else’s hands, and I did not fall so madly in love with a man I couldn’t function. Unlike my mother I handled things on my own. I had paid my own way for three years and I didn’t need Scout’s money to get by; I just wanted his love.

The prudent choice was obvious: I couldn’t accept Scout’s money. Sure, it would alleviate my financial woes, but it could drastically shift the balance of power in our relationship and I wasn’t sure it was even worth the risk.