The Ghosts of Blood and Innocence (9 page)

Pellaz expelled a short bark of laughter. ‘It appears you learned a lot from me.’

‘I did. Well?’

‘I will speak to Cal about it.’

‘I want Loki to celebrate his feybraiha here, because I can see it will be soon.  His first aruna should be with one of my hara. That seems only right. It would go down well with the Hegemony. It would seem like a gesture of alliance and friendship.’

‘True,’ Pellaz said. ‘There is sense in the idea.’

Galdra narrowed his eyes. ‘Cal wouldn’t want Loki to leave Immanion at that time, and yet I get the impression you don’t care either way. All you care about is the political ramifications of his heritage being revealed. That’s sad. Do you resent him so much?’

What Galdra hadn’t guessed was that the reason Pellaz wanted Loki to visit Freygard was so that his son could be close to Galdra, as he himself could not. Instead of revealing this, he found himself saying something harsh, which he didn’t mean at all. ‘If you really want to know,’ he said, ‘I would have preferred not to have had him, but he has turned out to be a good har. I admire and respect him.’

Galdra shook his head. ‘Why do I love you? You’re made of stone. You lost one son, under terrible circumstances, and he is most likely dead. Another is your enemy. However Loki came to be, he should be a balm to that hurt. Your indifference only convinces me more I should take a part in my son’s life.’

Pellaz tried to calm his heart, which had begun to beat faster. ‘You hardly know me, Galdra. You love a fiction. I’m not allowed to be anything but what I am. I’m like stone, a statue, a figurehead. I belong to Wraeththu, not to myself.’

Galdra appeared unimpressed by this speech. ‘I find myself grateful to Cal, for loving Loki, and that’s a strange and unexpected feeling.  But if he knew the truth…’

‘He
does
know the truth,’ Pellaz said.

Galdra was clearly surprised. ‘Then he’s more than I believed him to be.’

‘He is that,’ Pellaz said. ‘He’s very protective of Loki, but I will speak to him. He doesn’t want this matter to be made public either, for obvious reasons.’

Galdra hesitated for a moment, then said, ‘Why did he bring Loki here, Pell?’

‘I don’t know,’ Pellaz replied. ‘I advised against it — rightly so, as it turns out. Maybe he’s never felt that Loki was truly his son. Maybe he sought to put a ghost to rest.’ He paused. ‘You don’t want to make an enemy of Cal, Galdra. Trust me on that.’

‘I don’t wish to make any enemies,’ Galdra said. ‘It appears we might be facing a common threat again. Loki is a side issue, but an important one.’

Pellaz nodded. ‘It was foolish of me to allow Cal to bring Loki here. This is only the inevitable result and he’s brought it on himself. But if you promise to keep silent, then I see no reason why Loki shouldn’t spend some time in Freygard and celebrate his feybraiha here. It won’t do his education any harm.’

Galdra smiled coldly. ‘I’m glad you’re being rational.’

Pellaz grimaced. ‘Hardly that. However, whatever you might think of my feelings for Loki, I don’t want him to come while there’s any risk or threat. I’m talking, of course, of the phenomenon that’s appeared here. Surely, you wouldn’t put your own son in danger?’

‘I don’t think it poses any danger. We’re unclear what it is, but it appears that if hara stay away from it, there are no ill effects.’

‘What of the harling who discovered it?’

‘He’s still ill.’

Pellaz nodded once. ‘I see. Then let me take him back to Immanion with me. As you know, our healers are second to none.’

‘So are ours,’ Galdra said dryly, ‘but I’ll do anything to give the harling a chance. It seems a reasonable idea.’

‘I still think the phenomenon should be regarded as potentially dangerous,’ Pellaz said. ‘I’d like to examine it.’

Galdra inclined his head. ‘Of course. I’ll take you there myself.’

‘As you wish.’

Terez was still waiting outside with the
sedim
. Pellaz swung into his
sedu
Peridot’s saddle and communicated with the creature to examine the portal also. The
sedim
might have insight into it, Pell guessed. Few hara communed easily with the
sedim
, but Pellaz enjoyed a closer relationship with his than most.

The day had turned dank and a thick fog was rolling across the waters to the west. Galdra mounted his own horse, a stocky Freyhellan beast with plaits in its mane and tail. ‘Follow me. It’s on the cliff top.’ He urged his horse into a canter and, after exchanging a glance, Terez and Pellaz followed.

At the hawthorn grove, the party dismounted. Fog was tumbling in thickly now: it muffled sound, warped shapes and crept across the slick cliff tops in curls. Two of Eyra’s Listeners were at the site, along with three Freyhellan guards. Pellaz told them he had come to investigate the phenomenon himself and asked them to draw back, to give him some privacy. He and Galdra went alone into the trees. 

‘Where is it?’ Pellaz asked. The atmosphere felt electric in the close interior of the grove, where the hawthorns huddled together so closely, but he could perceive nothing with his physical eyes.

‘This is how it is,’ Galdra said. ‘Sometimes, it appears as a violet glow, like a globe. Sometimes, it’s just a sound, like the distant tolling of a bell. On some days, it makes your hair stand on end merely to be in here. Today is one of those days.’

‘And what exactly have you seen come out of it?’

‘Nothing. Hara have seen strange things in the town. Animals behave oddly, jumping at things we cannot see. There are noises, the feeling of being watched, but other than that…’ Galdra shrugged. ‘It’s difficult to perceive this as hostile. It just seems… well…
unknown
.’

‘Cal and I both wonder what effect hara have had on the otherlanes, intruding into them,’ Pellaz said. 

‘Well, it’s only the Gelaming who have the privilege of otherlanes transport,’ Galdra said in a terse tone. Pellaz could tell that the mention of Cal had wounded him. He hadn’t meant to do it.

‘It’s not only us,’ Pellaz said. ‘We know that Ponclast’s hara had the ability, or some of them did, and they had darker motives than Gelaming could ever have.’

‘You think Ponclast could be responsible?’

‘I doubt it. Lileem is perfectly capable of keeping him in confinement.’

Galdra spoke carefully. ‘Have you contacted her since…?’

‘No,’ Pellaz interrupted and swiftly changed the subject. ‘Perhaps this is just some kind of side effect, a random portal. I don’t know. The
sedim
are not very familiar with this area.’

‘No. The last time
I know of them visiting was long ago, when your sister Mima passed through.’

Pellaz called softly to Peridot and the
sedu
came into the grove, head lowered. Pellaz stroked his neck. ‘Peridot, if there is something hostile here, send me an image.’

The
sedu
raised his head and sniffed the air, ears flicking back and forth.

‘It’s incredible,’ Galdra said. ‘He really seems to understand you.’

‘He’s rather more than a horse; you know that.’

‘Even so…’

‘We have limited communication,’ Pellaz said, which was far from the truth. ‘Hush. I need to concentrate.’ Pellaz closed his eyes, attuned himself to Peridot’s essence.
What do you sense?

Nothing emerges from it but shadows and memory. It amplifies memories.

So the Freyhellans are just seeing things from their own minds?

Yes, and feeling them.

What of the harling who fell ill?

I can perceive no reason for that. The energy here is not toxic to harish forms, or to mine.

That is strange. Can you tell me anything else?

No, there is nothing else to tell. It is not an otherlanes portal. It is a tear in reality to an indistinct realm, perhaps a realm of nothing.  It should be healed.

Can you do this?

For some moments, Peridot ended communication. Pellaz opened his eyes. The
sedu’s
legs were splayed, his head lowered. His whole body shook.

‘Pell…’ Galdra said, ‘is he…?’

‘It’s all right,’ Pellaz replied, his hand firm against Peridot’s trembling flank. ‘He’s just investigating.’

After some moments, the
sedu
relaxed and shook his mane, like any normal horse.

Well?
Pellaz asked him.

Peridot did not answer immediately, and when he did, Pellaz was conscious of a strange kind of distance between him and the
sedu
.

The phenomenon may well heal of its own accord over time,
Peridot said.

Then do you know what caused it?

Peridot was silent for some moments.
I will communicate with my brethren later and attempt to find out.

Thank you.

Pellaz opened his eyes once more. ‘You’ll be pleased to know Peridot also assumes it’s safe.’

‘That’s good…’

‘But it concerns me he doesn’t know why the harling who found this thing was so affected. Perhaps it was coincidence and his malady stems from another source.’

Galdra sucked his lower lip, ducked his head. ‘That would be a great coincidence — too great.’

‘Perhaps.’ Pellaz ran his hand down Peridot’s neck and the
sedu
nudged him affectionately. ‘Well, it seems feasible to allow Loki to come to Freygard for the time being, but I think the Listeners and their guards should stay in attendance also. They can be Loki’s household.’

‘I’ll be pleased to make arrangements for that. Looking at him, I’d say his feybraiha is near.’

‘I expect so.’ Pellaz paused. ‘Cal and I must have some say in who you choose for him.’

‘Naturally. I want the best for him, as you do.’

Pellaz smiled grimly. ‘Good. Then we are in accord.’

He made to leave the grove, but Galdra caught hold of one of his arms. ‘Pell…’

Pellaz stiffened. ‘What?’

‘It doesn’t have to be this way between us… surely.’

Pellaz fixed him with a stare. ‘It does, Galdra. You think ill of me. I believed you were bright enough to understand the way I have to be.’

‘I don’t know what you mean. I accept that you and Cal…’ He broke off. ‘I can’t say it aloud. You know my heart. But if there is to be healing between our tribes, we should at least be friends.’

‘We are not enemies,’ Pellaz said. ‘Don’t for one moment think that what happened was any easier for me than for you.’ Let the Freyhellan make of that what he willed. Pellaz pulled his arm from Galdra’s hold and left the cover of the trees.

Chapter Six

When Darquiel was seven years old, rapidly approaching his own feybraiha, he had to watch his best friend change into a completely different creature. He and Amelza had always been close. She was his ally and his conspirator. They believed themselves to be superior to all other beings; partners in a world containing only two creatures. But then, seemingly overnight, Amelza became possessed. That was the only way Darq could describe it to himself. She developed a self-consciousness that was completely alien. She became secretive. He’d come across her in the woods, weeping alone. When he called to her, she’d run off. Some days, she’d be sharp with him, to the point of real aggressiveness, while on other days she’d want him to hold her, as if she were a kitten or a puppy, and then her eyes would fill with tears and she’d cry all over his shirt. She even looked different.

Finally, and it almost hurt him to consider it, Darq realised that Amelza was no longer a girl. She had lost something fragile and precious. Time had claimed her, put an iron collar on her. It was hideous. Becoming a woman seemed to mean she could no longer be his soul mate. His attempts to discuss it with her came to nothing. The friend he knew would have confided in him utterly, but this awkward stranger went mute or angry in his presence.

‘You’re different,’ he said. ‘What’s wrong with you? Go back to how you were.’

‘I want to!’ she yelled at him. ‘By all the gods, you have no idea how much I want to.’

‘Then, just do…’

‘You don’t know anything, Darquiel.’  She shook her head, looking as if she was about to cry, then sneered. ‘You’re just a child. You have no right to look the way you do.’

‘What do you mean?’ Darq asked, puzzled. ‘What’s wrong with how I look?’

Amelza uttered a strangled sound. ‘Nothing! Absolutely nothing! That’s the trouble.’

Then she’d stormed off, leaving Darq utterly bewildered. He knew he’d have to get some information about this distressing circumstance from somewhere, but shrank from questioning Phade or Zira. He knew what they’d say: it was none of his concern. Amelza was human. What was happening to her was inevitable.

As the years had passed, Darq had also come to spend more time in Olivia’s company, not least because he usually felt like an outsider among hara. Among humans, he knew he was supposed to feel that way, which was strangely comforting. He also liked Olivia’s personality; her dry words that were always right, and her ability to make sense of nonsense. As Amelza wrestled with the demons of puberty, sometimes hiding from him for days at a time, Darq would sit with Olivia in her kitchen or garden. Often, they didn’t talk at all, but he knew Olivia liked him. He sensed she was full of words she thought inappropriate to say.

One day, he said to her, ‘When Amelza is through with this… changing thing… will we be friends again?’

Olivia glanced as him askance.

‘It’s all very confusing to me,’ Darq said. ‘She will not speak to me in the way we used to speak. Why’s that? I’m still the same.’

Olivia pursed her lips. She was kneading dough at the old kitchen table. Flour particles drifted in sunlight. ‘Darq,’ she said. ‘It’s hard for her.’

‘I can see that,’ Darq said. ‘But it’s as if I burn her. I don’t care what hara or people think of me, but I do care about what she thinks. It’s like she’s part of me.’

‘Yes,’ said Olivia in a dark sort of tone. She sighed, stopped working. ‘It’s not my place to say certain things, but I can say this: she’s been cursed with the open eyes that will never shut.’