Sparrow (20 page)

I
try to hide my smirk and fail.

“You’re
confusing me,” my brother says to his fiancée.  “Do you like Derek or not?”

Ashley’s
expression twists.  “He’s always come across as arrogant to me.  When he
proposed, I told Addison marrying him was a bad idea.  I told her I thought she
was settling.”

My
eyebrows shoot up.  “Then, it wasn’t true love?”

“Who
knows?”  Ashley shrugs.  “They’ve been married for five years.  I guess
whatever they have works for them.”

Picking
up my burger, I take a bite to hide my scowl.  I wish it
didn’t
work for
them.

Since
I’m not caving in to my puppy’s begging, she moves on to Ashley and whines at
her feet.  Ashley looks down.  “She’s so cute.  Can I give her a fry?”

“No,”
I respond, my mouth stuffed.  “Let me get her some treats.”

As
I stand, I remember the only reason I didn’t wait for Derek in the parking lot
was the puppy.  Well, that and Addison wouldn’t have appreciated my pummeling
his face, especially in her condition.  Instead, I drove directly to the store
to get everything the dog would need.  It was a melancholy trip.  I kept
thinking Addison should be there with me and not in a hospital bed.

“Have
you decided on a name for her yet?” Kevin asks as I pull a bag of snacks down from
the top of the refrigerator.  “If she’s going to work with us, she needs a kick
ass name.”

“I
know,” I say as I shake a few treats into my hand.  “Any suggestions?”

“Killer,”
Kevin says.

I
shoot him a sarcastic look.  “Does she look like a Killer to you?”

“No,”
Ashley pipes up.  “I think she looks like a Smokey because of her gray fur.  Or
maybe a Mo, like an Eskimo.  She looks like a sled dog.”

Kevin’s
face twists.  “Remind me not to let you name our kids.”

Ashley
throws a wadded napkin at him.

I
walk back toward the table and I realize I need to come up with a name soon. 
The dog is going to think her name is “C’mere.”  I hand Ashley the treats to
feed the puppy and take a seat to finish my food.

It’s
after ten o’clock when my guests decide to leave.  I let the dog out to do her
business, then change clothes and head to bed.  I’ve been awake since five
a.m.  We received yet another snow storm last night, and the guys and I have been
putting in our fair share of overtime plowing.  Kevin may have a coronary next
week when he does payroll.

As
I crawl beneath the sheets, the puppy joins me and makes herself comfortable by
my side.  I probably shouldn’t allow her on the bed…or the couch or the chair,
for that matter.  It’s hard not to spoil her.  Time passes as I run my fingers
through her fur, and she manages to inch her way over me, so her entire body is
lying on top of my chest.  Eventually we’re nose to chin, and I can’t stop
myself from smiling and thinking Addison should see this.

Addison
should see this.

Reaching
to the side, I try not to jostle the dog too much as I grab my phone off the
desk.  Ashley said Addison needed distractions.  What’s better than a puppy?  I
take a picture of the dog and send it to Sparrow with the message:
Look
who’s staring at me. 
She’s probably asleep and won’t get the text
until morning, but hopefully it will make her smile.

My
cell vibrates in my hand before I have a chance to slide it back on to the
desk.  I touch the screen and a picture of Sam pops up; his chin resting over
the edge of a bed, his eyes pleading.  The message reads:
This is who I’m
looking at.  He wants to get into bed with me.

Poor
Sam
, I
think. 
You and me both, buddy.

Quickly,
I think of something to send back. 
Did I wake you?  I’m sorry.

No
, she responds. 
I
haven’t been sleeping much lately.

My
forehead pinches. 
Everything okay?

I
can’t turn my mind off :(

I
don’t need to ask her what she’s thinking about.  The last few days – hell, the
last few months – have been a confusing emotional cocktail.  I’ve gone from
surprise, to happiness, to anger, to regret.  Now, I’ve landed on worry.  I
assume she’s feeling the same things, only heavier.

Is
there anything I can do?
I send.

It
takes her a moment to respond. 
My issues are mine.  Don’t worry about
me.

I
scowl as I type. 
Impossible.  We said no lies.  Tell me what I can do.

Again,
seconds pass.  Just as I think she’s not going to answer, she finally sends,
Keep
talking to me
.

Easy
enough. 
Should I call?

My
phone rings.  “Hello?”

“Beat
you to it,” she says in my ear.

I
smile.

Like
an idiot.

The
puppy moves to get comfortable, and, suddenly, I know what to talk about.  “So,
I need your help,” I say.

“With
what?”

“Naming
the dog.”  I scratch behind her ears.  “Any thoughts?”

“You
haven’t named her yet?”  Addison asks, surprised.  “What have you come up with
so far?”

“Kevin
suggested Killer, and Ashley came up with Smokey and Mo.  I’m not feeling any
of them.”

“Hmmm.”
 I picture her biting her lip.  “Her mother’s name was Victoria.  What about Vicky?”

I
dislike Vicky, but I kind of like Vic.  Wait.  “What about Tori?” I suggest.

As
soon as I say the name, the puppy lifts her head and flicks her ears.  She
pants and her tail starts to wag.  It makes me laugh.

“What’s
funny?” Addison asks.

“I
think she likes Tori.  She got excited.”

“Well,
there you go.”  Addison sounds like she’s smiling.  “Tori Dayton.”

It
does have a nice ring to it.  “I’m glad you called,” I say.  “Thanks for your
help.”

“No,
thank you,” Addison says.

“For
what?”

“The
other day.  I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

I
know what she would have done.  She would have waited for Derek or called
Ashley.  As anxious as I was over what was happening, I’m glad I was with her
when it did.  I can’t imagine what it would have been like for her to be alone.

“I
told you before,” I say. “I’ll be whatever you need.  A shoulder to cry on, an
alibi, or –”

“Bar
night revenge,” she finishes for me.  “I remember.”

We
spend the next hour on the phone together.  Addison tells me about an upcoming
spring dance recital at her work, and I tell her about how this winter is
kicking Dayton Landscaping’s ass but lining my pockets.  We discuss dogs and
vets, and then Addison lets me in on a secret: she’s behind on planning
Ashley’s bachelorette party.

“Don’t
you dare tell her,” she threatens me.

“I
think she would understand,” I say.  “It’s not like you haven’t had other
things to deal with.”

“Still,”
she sighs.  “It’s one of my few jobs for this wedding.  Where are you with
Kevin’s party?”

“Nowhere,”
I confess.  “It’s not that complicated for guys.  I figure we’ll hit the casino
and see where the night goes from there.”

“You
had better remember Ashley’s rules,” Addison threatens.  “No strippers.”

“Riiiiiight,”
I draw out the word.  “And what will you ladies be up to?  Dinner and a movie?”

“Maybe.”

“You’re
such a liar.”

She
laughs.

The
idea of Addison watching a male review and tossing dollar bills at some
chiseled dancer makes me grind my teeth.  I’m such a hypocrite; I was planning
on violating Ashley’s rule.  Strippers are expected at bachelor parties.

Addison
yawns, making me realize the time.  “I’d better let you go,” I say.  “You sound
tired.”

“I
am,” she says.

As
much as I don’t want to stop talking to her, she needs to sleep.  “Then this is
good night.”

“’Night,”
she says before hanging up.

Setting
the phone down, I roll on to my side and punch the pillow to get comfortable. 
Tori moves and then lies down again.  I’m happy I talked to Addison.  Hopefully
our conversation took her mind off things for a little while.

As
my eyes drift shut, my mind turns with thoughts of her.  God, I wish she was
here.  In my house, in my bed, in my arms.  Eventually, my body starts to relax. 
Just as I feel myself drifting, my cell vibrates against the desk.  Sleepily, I
roll over and grab it.

Are
you still awake?

I
squint at the bright screen in the dark and respond. 
Yes.

My
cell rings and I answer.  “Hey.”

“Kyle?” 
Her voice sounds small.

“Sparrow?”

I
hear her take a breath.  “Do you...?” she drifts off.  “Would you…?” she tries
again.

Curious,
I patiently wait.

“Just…don’t
hang up,” she says quietly.  “Okay?”

“Okay,”
I say, concerned.   “I’m with you until morning.”

“Promise?”
she asks.

“I
promise.”

We
fall silent and I don’t bother to ask what’s wrong.  If I can’t comfort her in
person, I’ll do it over the phone.  Whatever she needs.

“Sweet
dreams,” I say as I lie back against the pillow.

“You
too,” she whispers.

Thump
thump.

My
eyes abandon the winter budget to watch the office door slowly open.  “Anyone
home?” Jen asks as she peers inside.

“Hey.” 
Kevin’s face breaks into a smile.  “Long time, no see.”

My
brother’s desk sits across from mine, and he lowers his propped feet.  Leaning
forward, he tries to see around our visitor.  “Is that a bag in your hand?” 
His eyes grow wide.  “Please tell me you brought lemon bars.”

“Surprise!”
Jen says and produces a white paper bag from behind her back.  “Norma made them
this morning.”

“I
love you,” Kevin says, his face serious.  He jumps to his feet and meets Jen
between our desks to grab the sweet snacks.  My brother is a sucker for Norma’s
lemon bars.  She’s Jen’s boss and she only makes them every few months.  They
are pretty damn good.

“Are
you on lunch?” I ask.  I didn’t know she was going to drop by.

“Yes,”
she says and looks around the room.  “Where’s Tori?”

The
puppy, who was sleeping by my feet, wakes to the sound of her name.  “She’s
right here,” I say, looking down as I push my chair back.  “She still refuses
to sleep on the dog bed.”

Since
I bring Tori to work with me every day, I made her an area by the filing
cabinets.  She has food dishes, a few toys, a kennel if we need to leave her, and
a red plaid-print dog bed.  She won’t use it, though.  It’s been days and she prefers
to sleep on the hard ground by my feet.

Jen
scoops up the puppy as soon as she sees her.  Excited to see a familiar face,
Tori goes in for the kill and starts to lick Jen’s chin to death.  She squints
and laughs.  “I know, baby.  I missed you, too,” she coos.

Involuntarily,
my eyes roll.  “You saw her yesterday.  I’m starting to think you’re using me for
the dog more than sex.”

Jen
raises an eyebrow and Kevin almost chokes on his lemon bar.  “I am using you
for the dog.  When’s the last time we messed around?” she asks.

“Last
week,” I answer.

“Okay.” 
Kevin clears his throat and sits on the edge of his desk.  “You two have the
most twisted friendship I know.”

“At
least we can be honest with each other,” Jen says as she tries to contain a
wriggling Tori in her arms.  “Actually, that’s why I’m here.”  Her eyes land on
me and widen.  “Guess who called?”

I’m
lost.  “Who?”

“New
Year’s Eve guy.”

“Seriously?”

She
nods. 

“What’d
he say?  ‘I’m sorry it took me months to call’?”

“Basically.” 
She kisses the top of Tori’s head and sets her down.  “I’m going out with him
on Saturday.”

“Why?”
Kevin asks with a frown.  “He sounds like a jerk.”

“He’s
not,” Jen says.  “He went out of town.  Now he’s back.”

“What
did he leave for?”

She
shrugs.  “I don’t know.”

“Jen.” 
Kevin’s tone turns full-on big brother.  “You can’t go out with a total
stranger.”

She
starts to laugh.  “News flash!  That’s what dating
is
.”  She turns to
me.  “I’m sure he knew all about Ashley when he started seeing her.  Am I
right?”

“What
time is your date?” I ask.

“Seven.”

I
nod.  “Secret word?”

Jen
tips her head in thought, and her eyes scan the room.  They land on the white
paper bag.  “Lemon,” she decides.

“Got
it.”

Kevin
stands.  “What in the hell are you two talking about?”

“If
my date goes bad, I’ll text Kyle the word ‘lemon.’  Then, he’ll know to come
and pick me up.”

Clearly
confused, my brother’s eyes dart between me and my ex.  “Jen works at a bar,” I
explain.  “When we were dating, we had the secret word.  If she needed me
because some creep was hitting on her, she would text me the code.”

Kevin’s
expression reflects understanding.  Then, it morphs back into confusion.

After
splitting another dessert with my brother, Jen finds Tori for one last cuddle
before she leaves.  When she finishes petting the dog, she leans over my desk. 
“You’re okay with this, right?  I mean, we’re okay?” she asks.

“Of
course,” I say.  Honestly, I’m a little surprised at my lack of jealousy over
the situation.  Our arrangement had to end sometime and, frankly, I’m fine with
it.  My thoughts are consumed with Addison, especially since we fall asleep on
the phone together more often than not.  I bump my fist against Jen’s arm in a
playful way.  “Go have fun.”

She
smiles and plants a quick kiss on my forehead.  “You’re the best.”

After
she leaves, I feel the weight of my brother’s stare.  Minutes tick by before I
cave in and look at him.  He’s leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed when
I ask, “What?”

“I
can’t believe you did that.”

My
expression twists.  “Did what?”

“Let
an amazing woman walk out of here with plans to see another guy.”

I
sigh.  “We’re not together.  She can see whoever she wants.”

Kevin
leans forward in his chair.  “I hope you don’t regret this.”

Again,
I shoot him a confused look.

“What
if Jen moves on for real?” he asks.  “Is that what you want?  You two seem to
be getting along great.”

“I
want what’s best for her,” I say.  “If she wants to go out then she should.”

My
brother looks skeptical.  “Tell me you didn’t feel anything when she told you
about the date.”

“I
didn’t feel anything.”

He
shakes his head.  “If I were you, I wouldn’t have let her go.  You’re a better
man than me.”

I
smile weakly.  With the way I feel about a certain married woman, I highly
doubt that.

~~~~

Jen
never sent me the secret word.  She did, however, call to let me know her date
went well and she had plans to see him again.  I haven’t had much communication
with her since.  I think Tori misses her.

Who
am I kidding?  I miss her too.

Not
in an “I-didn’t-realize-what-I-had” kind of way, but more of an “I’m-bored-and-I-don’t-kn0w-what-to-do-with-myself”
kind of way.  Here I sit, a week later, alone with my dog, watching TV.  It’s
not late enough for Addison to call, and Kevin went up north to check on the
cottage.  It’s March; we haven’t been up there since October, and out of
nowhere Kev got a bug up his ass to visit the place.  Secretly, I think I know
what’s going on:

He
needs some space.

As
the wedding date approaches, he and Ashley can’t see eye to eye on anything. 
Their latest argument was over a seated dinner at the reception.  Kevin wants a
buffet instead, because it’s cheaper with more food selections.  Ashley, on the
other hand, thinks it’s rude to make people wait in line for their dinner.  After
listening to my brother rehash the story, I agreed with him – I would choose
the buffet, too.  So what if guests have to serve themselves?  The option is
worth saving a couple grand.

Realizing
it’s unacceptable to spend the night contemplating Kevin’s choices, I decide to
get off my ass and take Tori for a walk.  We meander down three blocks and back
again, with a quick stop to talk to a jogger wearing tight spandex.  She thinks
Tori is adorable.  No, I didn’t miss the batting eyelashes, the coy smile, or
the subtlety in her statement that she jogs this way every evening and has
never seen us.  If she only knew my plan was to go home, reheat the casserole
my mom dropped off, and crash into bed to wait for Addison’s call, she probably
would have kept jogging.  Nothing screams hot bachelor like eating mom’s meals
and anticipating a call from your ex.

Speaking
of, when midnight rolls around and I haven’t heard from her, I start to wonder
where she is.  I could have sworn she said she would call tonight when I hung
up with her this morning.  Then again, I was groggy, so it’s possible I heard
wrong.  I’m just about to text her when the phone rings.

“Hey,”
I answer, relieved.  “I’ve been waiting for your call.”

“Oh,
really?  Do I call often?”

Shit. 
That’s not Addison’s voice.  “Ashley?”

“The
one and only.”

“Why
are you calling me from Addison’s phone?”

“Because
we’re fucking stranded.”

She
sounds pissed.  “What happened?” I ask as I throw my blankets aside and swing
my feet to the floor.

“Girl’s
night gone wrong,” she huffs.

My
forehead pinches as I search for my jeans.  “Where are you?  Where’s Addison?”

“We’re
at Necto.  Hold on.”  I hear what sounds like a door open and music that sounded
muffled grows louder.  Ashley must be walking.  “Sorry!” she shouts.  “I had to
find her.  She’s on the dance floor!”

Walking
over to my dresser, I find a shirt and pull it over my head.  It’s going to
take me almost an hour to get there.  Assuming their car broke down, I ask, “Do
you need a tow truck?”

“No!” 
She lets out a bitter laugh.  “Derek took Addison’s keys!”

I
freeze.  “What?”

“Just
get here!” Ashley yells, the music in the background growing louder.  “My buzz
is wearing off and I need to keep an eye on our girl!”

“Why?”

“Let’s
just say she’s feeling no pain!”

I
head for the front door and find my shoes.  “I’m on my way.”

“Okay!”
she shouts before hanging up.

When
I arrive at the club, it’s a little after one a.m.  I broke multiple traffic
laws to set that time record, but I wanted to get to the girls.  For one, Kevin
would kill me if anything happened to Ashley, and two, I don’t understand why
Derek caused this, but I want to find out.

Asshole.

My
eyes roam the darkened room for familiar faces, and I find Ashley seated at a
high-top table next to the dance floor.  She raises a glass and sips from a
straw.  As I make my way over, I notice her gaze is fixed.  I stop beside her
and follow her line of vision.

My
jaw drops.

The
last time I saw Addison, she was lying in a hospital bed.  Tonight, she’s
dancing with her eyes closed, oblivious to the world around her.  She’s wearing
a black fitted mini-dress and, aside from its thigh-high length, it appears
modest from the front.  However, when she turns around, the back of the dress
is practically non-existent.  It’s cut low, landing just above her ass, with
thin chains draped from side to side across her back.  The changing lights from
the dance floor reflect off the metal, hypnotizing me.  Or maybe it’s the way
she moves; I’m not sure.  My eyes travel down her legs to her heels, which are sky-high
with straps that fasten around her ankles.  Unbidden, thoughts I can’t control
invade my mind.

Me,
marching out on to the dance floor.

Me,
pulling her body against mine.

Me,
kissing the breath out of her.

“Enjoying
the show?” Ashley asks.

My
eyes snap to her face, and she smirks.  She uncrosses her legs and starts to
gather her purse.  “Go get her so we can leave,” she says.

“Why
don’t you?” I ask.

“Because
you clearly want to.”  Ashley gives me a ‘don’t be stupid’ look.  “Besides,
I’ve been trying to get her to sit down for the last hour.  She won’t listen to
me.”

I
turn toward the dance floor and zero in on Addison.  Her eyes are still
closed.  Weaving my way through a few bodies, I step up to her just as she
turns to expose her back to me.  Consciously, I clench my hands into fists so I
won’t touch her.

“Addison.” 
I lean forward to talk over the music.  “It’s time to go.”

She
turns around and lazily opens her eyes.  She blinks a few times before a slow
smile creeps across her face.   “You’re here,” she says, almost like she doesn’t
believe it.

I
nod and shove my hands in my pockets.  “Ashley’s ready to leave.”

Unexpectedly,
she throws her body against my mine.  She wraps her arms around my neck and tries
to bury her head beneath my chin, but her shoes make her too tall.  I reach out
to keep my balance and end up clutching her hips.  “Dance with me,” she whispers
in my ear.

Swallowing
hard, I glance over her head at Ashley.  Our eyes meet and she points to her
wrist, as if she’s wearing an invisible watch.

“No,
we need to go,” I manage to say.  I step back and reach for Addison’s arms to
untangle myself.  “I’m here to take you home.”

She
leans away from me and frowns.  “Because Derek took my keys?”

“Yes.”

Now
that I’m standing this close to her, I can see the glaze in her eyes.  When she
spoke, I could smell the sweet tang of alcohol on her breath.

She’s
drunk.