Losing Myself in You (14 page)

When Bridgette awoke the next day, she knew exactly where she was and why she was there.  Her room.  Not just a room she was temporarily staying at for an indeterminate portion of time, but
her room
. She wasn't afraid though, and oddly enough, Bridgette didn't regret her decision of turning herself over in exchange for her team. She owed Marcus that much, to try this unconventional relationship and to see where it went. She would even say she was curious.

She threw her legs over the bed and slipped on a pair of black pants and a long sleeved shirt, plus some Converse shoes from the day before. Bridgette took her time brushing her hair, and after a moment's consideration, decided to leave it down. She didn't put on any make up save for some
chapstick, and before she left, took a peek out of her window. What she saw caused her whole mouth to drop and her eyes to sparkle. It had apparently snowed the night before, and the forest that surrounded the manor looked like a literal winter wonderland. At that moment, she decided she would throw on a sweatshirt and go explore it. She loved the snow and if her job had permitted more time off, she would have taken full advantage of it. But, alas, the NDS was incredibly strict about vacation time and she never really got the chance to.

Now, however…

Before Bridgette could finish her thought, a knock on the door interrupted her. She had reached such a state of happiness that she didn't think twice about opening it, only to find Marcus standing there on the other side. His hair was as thick as ever, his sideburns climbing down to his chin. He was wearing a thin, long-sleeved shirt underneath his typical motorcycle jacket, jeans, and combat boots.

"Good morning," he
said, his lips quirking up into somewhat of an amused smile upon seeing her attire. "I notice that you're dressed for the outdoors. Have any plans I should know about?"

Bridgette could tell he was teasing her, but she wanted to make sure he knew that she wasn't planning anything inappropriate. "No plans to escape today," she said, reaching up and patting him on the shoulder. "Sorry to disappoint you."

Marcus chuckled, locking his hazel eyes with hers. "Actually, I wanted to know if you would like to accompany me for a walk around the grounds?" he asked.  For some odd reason, Bridgette thought he seemed nervous asking her a simple question. Marcus Sterling never got nervous.  "I was hoping to give you the tour of the grounds," he added, more for himself than for her.

"Really?"
Bridgette asked, pushing her brow up as another smile cascaded across her features. "I was just about to go and do that myself, but I would love some company, especially since you know the place."

Marcus felt himself smile at her answer, and he nodded once, offering her his arm. She grinned and slipped her arm through his, and within a manner of moments, the two were outside, amidst the lightly falling snow. Marcus watched as Bridgette's face paled while her cheeks were simultaneously pinched red due to the vast temperature change, but she didn't seem too bothered by it.

"Aren’t you cold" Bridgette asked, tilting her head up in his direction in order to catch his eyes. "I mean, look at what you're wearing. I'm wearing three layers and I'm still freezing. You're barely in a jacket and jeans."

"I'm a wolf," Marcus explained as he tried to keep the obvious tone out of his voice. "My body temperature is naturally higher than a human's, more so than ever compared to a vampire's. I know that you must be cold, but to me, the snow only feels cool to me, rather than icy cold. So in answer to your question, no, I'm not cold." He gave her a wolfish grin that Bridgette couldn't help but smile at.

"Does it upset you?" Bridgette asked in a quiet voice as he led her to the backyard. She avoided the back porch, where she was almost mauled by a pack of wolves, where Marcus had stepped in and saved her, and instead, turned her attention to the backyard.  The forest had a pathway filled with snow that led into the woods.  Tall trees with heavy leaves decorated with pure, white snow.  It was quiet; a peaceful paradise. "What I mean is; do you
wish
the snow was colder to you? Snow is supposed to be cold and everything."

Marcus pursed his lips together, cocking his head to the side. "You know, I've never thought about it," he murmured, before glancing ahead of him. "Oh, I want to show you something over here." He led her over to one of the first tall, thick oak trees located in the center of the first line of the group.  There a heart was carved into the wood and initials were inside the
heart. "This," he said, nodding to the tree, "is where my father proposed to my mother. And here he carved their initials into a tree. Above my grandparents' and my great-grandparents'. It's a tradition that's been long-standing in my family."

"One day, your initials are going to be up there," Bridgette pointed out. She placed her hand on the tree and started walking around it, leaving Marcus to stare at the hearts that decorated the tree.  She didn’t want to think about it. "Hey Marcus," she called
out from behind the trunk. "Have you even been in a snowball fight?"

"A
wha-?" Before he could finish his question, Marcus was hit square in the face with a ball of snow. His mouth dropped open, clearly surprised at what she had just done. He rubbed his hand down his face and his lips quirked up in a smirk as his eyes glinted. "I don't think you realize, sweetheart, just who you're up against…" He leaned down and grabbed some of snow before molding it into an awkward shaped ball. Due to the fact that his senses were quite stellar, he could pick out her scent with ease, and before Bridgette knew it, she had ice slithering down the back of her shirt.

Bridgette let out a shriek, causing Marcus to throw his head back and laugh in delight. Upon hearing this, Bridgette narrowed her eyes and knelt down. Compared to other wolves, she was definitely fast, just not fast enough. She threw the snowball at him, but he managed to dodge it with relative ease.

"That's not fair!" Bridgette exclaimed, her hands behind her back as her lips contorted into a pout. "You have superhuman abilities. There's no way I can beat you."

Marcus shrugged his shoulders and opened his arms as he began to walk towards her. "That's okay," he said, his lips quirking up into a smirk. "What counts is that you tried, right?" He wrapped his arms around Bridgette's shivering body, and immediately Bridgette felt warmth… and suddenly, without warning, Bridgette lifted her hand and smashed a snowball on top of Marcus's head.

---

Marcus growled in surprise, jumping as he did so. When he heard the sound of Bridgette's laughter, he felt himself pause, and his lips twitch up in a smile. He hadn't let go of her just yet, and she wasn't exactly pushing him away. In fact, unless his senses were deceiving him, she was trying to get even closer to him, hoping to steal his heat while at the same time being near him as much as possible. Marcus tightened his grip on her, and he felt her sigh in
content as she placed the side of her face against his chest. He leaned his cheek against the top of her head before inhaling sharply in order to fill his senses with her scent. She was growing on him, he realized, and suddenly he didn't mind it all that much.

"Is this what we're going to be doing for the next week?" Bridgette asked, refraining from moving her head to look at him. She seemed to be too comfortable in her current position to do so anyways.

"I should probably tell you my brother will be here within the next week," Marcus said, feeling an unwanted frown touch his lips. "Since you are here of your own free will, it is probably necessary that you meet him because when you get married, you're not getting married to just that person, but to his entire family." Marcus's frown only deepened when he said that but he refused to acknowledge why.

"My mom always told me that," Bridgette said, tracing mindless patterns against his chest, her fingertip against the cotton material. She paused for a minute before tilting her head up so their faces were mere centimeters apart, their clouded breaths intermingling. "Do you think he'll like me?"

"I think he'll like you too much," he told her. Bridgette raised her brow, inquiring him to explain further, and for a moment, Marcus wasn't sure he wanted to. But at the same time, he wanted to be honest with her. "As it always is with brothers, we have a rivalry of sorts. He hasn't been here in a while because he could never get over the fact that I inherited this pack, but in wolf tradition, the eldest does just that. He keeps in touch every once in a while, if not with me, than with Ryan and Brandon. And once he sees that I might take you on as my Mate, he might compete with me in some way."

He watched Bridgette smile. "What do you mean
might
take me as your Mate?" she asked, her voice teasing but her eyes serious.

"I can’t just throw you over my shoulder and take you against your freewill," Marcus said, returning her smile with a wolfish one of his own. "You’ll have to make up your mind eventually."

According to werewolf tradition, when a werewolf returns to their pack after being away for a while, a huge feast is prepared in his or her honor. Afterwards, the pack continues the celebration by having a run through the forest as wolves, enjoying the feeling of freedom. A room is prepared for the honored guest any traveling companion, and for the first couple of nights, the returner recounts stories of their adventures. If the reason why they left in the first place was unknown, there is a good chance an explanation would be offered, but if it is on pack record, no explanation is necessary.

Gerard Sterling was nearly as tall as his older brother, but instead of having rich, chestnut brown hair, his was short and auburn. His eyes were a crystal blue, and his face was more of an oval shape. He was slightly leaner than Marcus, but Marcus was stronger and faster. In fact, Gerard would always go on about how Marcus was better than him at everything
,
which didn't quite sit well with the young wolf. After attempting to win the title of Alpha from his brother and failing, he left. That was nearly twenty years ago, and now that he was back, Marcus was unsure as to why.

The first thing Marcus did when Gerard arrived was pull him aside so he could talk to his younger brother in private.  He led him to the library – a place no one save for Abigail went anymore – and the two walked in, Marcus not bothering to close the doors behind him. Gerard's nose twitched.

"I smell," he began, cocking his head slightly to the side. "I smell a
human
."  Marcus narrowed his eyes at his brother’s tone.  Gerard seemed fascinated, perhaps disgusted, but not surprised.  How did he know they were housing a human anyways?

Gerard’s eyes tried to follow his nose, hoping to spot just who the scent was coming from when his eyes caught sight of an attractive-looking woman conversing with a young maid through the library doors. His lips immediately curled into a grin and he licked them. "Oh, Marcus, you never disappoint, do you?” he asked, and Marcus wanted to backhand the smug grin off of his brother’s face. “Not only do you get me a fine specimen of food, but I get to play with this one first."

Marcus took hold of his brother's shirt with both of his hands, and a growl escaped from his throat. "Don't even think about touching her," he warned his younger brother through gritted teeth. "She might become your Queen."

Gerard's face contorted into a scowl as Marcus let his brother go. "Are you serious, Marcus?" Gerard asked, completely appalled at what his brother just revealed. "Your Mate, the woman you chose, is
human
?  Pathetic. How is this even sitting with the Elders?"

"They like the idea," Marcus said, his jaw still tense and his hazel eyes still narrowed. "I mean it, Gerard. If you touch her, if you say anything inappropriate to her, I will kick you out of this pack myself."

Gerard pulled out from Marcus’s grasp and wiped down wrinkles that littered the front of his shirt.  “I have business matters to discuss anyways,” he said.  “Send up one of your lieutenants, would you?  I need their help to run some numbers for me.”

Marcus held back a retort.  How like Gerard to come barging in the mansion and order him and his pack around as though Gerard were Alpha.  As long as it kept him away from Bridgette, however, Marcus would do almost anything.

---

Something wasn’t sitting right with Bridgette, and it all had to do with Marcus’s brother.  He rubbed her the wrong way.  Like, why did he constantly need to talk to Ryan or Brandon?  What were they doing in his room?  Why hadn’t they been formally introduced yet?  Why did he keep looking at her like she was a piece of meat he was going to chew up and spit out?  Why did he return in the first place?  Marcus definitely didn’t trust him; that was for sure.  He all but forced her to bunk with him until Gerard left – which was just fine with Bridgette.

There was a party coming up tonight as a means of celebration, and Bridgette was banking on Gerard to get totally bombed so she could sneak into his room and do some sleuthing.

Surprisingly enough, it didn’t take long before Gerard was on his fifth glass of wine, and everyone was too distracted to notice her slip out for the restroom.

Abigail followed – Bridgette had recruited her to be her lookout – and they both silently headed up the stairs and down the long, narrow hallway.  Abigail handed Bridgette her master key all maids had so they could keep the rooms tidy, and in a manner of seconds, the agent was in Gerard’s room.  Her feet immediately led her to his desk, which was neat and pristine.  She had no idea what she was looking for, but she was certain she would know it if she found it.

“Are you almost done?” Abigail whispered from the doorframe.

Bridgette didn’t answer.  She was now searching the closet, looking for a shoebox or some miniscule object boys kept their porn stash in to hide it.  Gerard was smart; that much was for sure.

When the closet was deemed useless, Bridgette got on her hands and knees and turned her attention to the bed.

“Bridge?” Abigail whispered.  “I think I hear footsteps.”

Bridgette had her arms underneath the bed, her hands reaching around, looking for anything…

“Bridge?”

Nothing on the floor.

“People are coming.”

Then her fingers wrapped around a folder taped to the underside of the mattress.  Success!

“Let’s go, Abigail!” she returned.  “People will wonder why we’re gone.”

“It’s a false alarm,” Abigail told her.  “No people.”  She looked at the folder.  “What’s that?”

Bridgette shrugged.  “I don’t know,” she said.  “But I’m going to find out.”

---

The next day, Marcus and Bridgette were in the manor's library together, each of them reading silently.  Bridgette had scoured through the paperwork that evening, after sending Abigail down to tell them she had had too much to drink and was currently throwing up, and found exactly what she was looking for.  Now all she had to do was tell Marcus
before
Gerard found out she had taken his folder.

The couple was lounged on one of the library's couches with Marcus on one side with Bridgette's head in his lap, lying down. Bridgette was trying to concoct a way to tell Marcus without offending him.  This was his brother, after all, and not only that, some of his pack was involved too.  It made her uncharacteristically quiet.

It also didn’t help that they both hadn’t had sex in the past week. Due to the connection the two shared, the craving of physical intimacy was at an all-time high. There were a couple of instances when Bridgette and Marcus had been on the brink of such an act, but both had taken control of their raging desires at the very last minute. However, on the bright side, it seemed to have brought them closer together emotionally. They were constantly learning about each other, likes and dislikes, preferences and annoyances, and both had secretly come to the conclusion that they could probably live with each other. Of course, that didn't mean they didn't have their share of fights; they did, and such fighting was almost constant. In fact, many of the wolves who had witnessed it wondered how they could even stand to be in the same room, let alone consider marriage, but somehow, it seemed to work for them.

There were also instances like this, where neither of them were fighting or even speaking. They were just relaxing, silently enjoying the other's presence.

Except, if Bridgette was being honest, she was getting a little flustered. The book she had chosen to pretend to read while thinking of the right words to say was a romance novel written by a former member of the pack who left when she met her Mate.  At first, she thought this would be quite amusing because she always used to find romance novels funny instead of romantic, and the fact that their sex scenes were – Well, she couldn't judge all romance novels on the few she had read, but she had never taken them seriously.  But she felt herself getting pulled in by the language, the scenario the hero and heroine were in…

This woman wrote with such descriptive language that Bridgette could feel almost everything the heroine was feeling at any given moment. She had never craved sex from any one person before, but with Marcus so close to her and the fact that they hadn't been together in what felt like forever…

Marcus could smell her desire for him before she even said anything. It made concentrating on his book all the more difficult, especially when his eyes glazed over and darken. He could hear her breathe and almost decipher her inner turmoil. He sat there, hoping she would just give in because he wanted nothing more than to feel her around him once again.

But Bridgette had never felt comfortable enough to be sexually confident. Rarely did she ever start sex, but now… She felt the familiar pulsating knock from inside her pelvis walls in time with her beating heart. Her body felt hot and humid; she needed satisfaction, she needed him right now, right there.

She might have been patient, but Marcus wasn't. He snapped his book closed before leaning down and claiming Bridgette's lips with his own. Bridgette felt as though he was giving her life, and she reached up to wrap her arms around his neck. The angle they were at was awkward, so Bridgette broke the kiss and stood up on shaky knees. At first, Marcus thought she had more self-control over herself than he could ever hope to achieve and let out a muffled growl due to the lack of stimulation. But then he saw her take a seat on the edge of a round desk before looking over at him and locking her eyes with his.

"Here," she said in a breathless whisper, but he had heard her crystal clear. "Take me on the desk."

Marcus didn't need to be told twice, and in mere seconds, he was standing above her, attacking her neck with his tongue while his hands unbuttoned her jeans before yanking them off of her. They both knew that anyone could walk in on them at any moment, so going completely nude was out of the question. They just needed a quick fix and they would be satisfied, if only momentarily.

For the span of three breaths, Marcus simply stared down at Bridgette's face, his fingers running through red strands of hair. Bridgette blushed at his intense scrutiny.

"What?" she asked him softly with a smile.

"It's nothing," he said, his voice low. "You're just beautiful."

Bridgette felt her face redden even more, and this caused Marcus to smile. He reveled in the fact that he had the ability to make her blush at the most unexpected times, but it didn't deter him from the task at hand. Within moments, Marcus had slipped inside of her, and both let out ragged sighs of content. This was what they had been waiting for so long, and now that it was happening, Bridgette couldn't quite believe it.

Marcus leaned over her, both hands on either side of her head, and gradually began to increase his speed. Bridgette's legs were wrapped around him and her back was arched up so he could penetrate her as deeply as was possible, and with every thrust, she bucked her hips up in order to meet him.

Both of them tried to keep quiet in order to alleviate any suspicion of what they were doing, but occasionally, a whimper or a moan would slip out. At that moment, Marcus realized he didn't want to do this with anyone else. Maybe he always knew that, but it was more than just the mark he left on Bridgette's neck telling him so. In his mind, in his heart, he knew that if she rejected his proposal, he would have no one. He didn't want anyone else, and he could only hope that she felt the same way.

Bridgette bit her bottom lip when she felt tension start to build, and before she could stop herself, she released it, climaxing against Marcus with fervor that Marcus was pushed over the edge himself. He couldn't help but watch her, and if they had more time, he probably would have suggested they do it again. But alas, they didn't. At least both of them gained some sort of relief. Maybe it wouldn't take so long the next time.

---

From the corner of a secret room, Gerard took a step back from the wall and slipped the painting back over the small eye-shaped hole that allowed him to see into the library. He had to hurry back in case someone noticed that he was gone.