Losing Myself in You (12 page)

It was easy for Bridgette to fall into a deep slumber that night.  She didn’t have any pressing concerns weighing heavily on her shoulders anymore, now that she had talked to Dr. Gupta. The psychologist deemed that she was fit enough to return to work (though she would be stuck at her desk for the next few weeks so her superiors could monitor the venom seeping in her body) and she hadn't seen or heard from Marcus, at least, not yet.

The room was familiar in texture, but she had never visited it before
.
It was the type of bed found in a fantasy: Egyptian cotton sheets, a matching pure white room filled with nothing except space, a canopy surrounding the California King bed. Her eyes were so caught up in staring at her new environment that she didn't realize somebody was behind her, watching her. It was only until he wrapped his arms firmly around her waist and began to kiss her neck did she notice that she wasn't alone. She should have jumped or felt her body tense up, anything to tell her that she was surprised, but to be honest, she really wasn't…

Bridgette tilted her head away from him, allowing his lips the full access he craved, and he wasted no time sucking on her skin, claiming it as his own once again.

"
Why did you leave?" The question was firm and demanding, but not harsh. The words vibrated against the column of her throat and descended until she felt a tickle of it between her legs.

"
I couldn't stay." She felt his fingers slip between the elastic of her pants and begin to trace mindless patterns into her smooth skin.

A whimper escaped past her lips and as she pressed herself against him, she could feel that he wanted her as badly as she wanted him. This time, Bridgette wasn't going to rationalize anything. Her mind had already forgotten her psychologist's warning; this was a dream, nothing more, and she could do whatever she wanted in her dream. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to be connected to Marcus Sterling once again. Her body craved more than she would ever admit, and she highly doubted any other man, beast, or vampire could please her like Marcus could.

Marcus slowly sunk his canine teeth into Bridgette's skin. She gasped but did not push him away and Marcus didn't sink them in any further. The pleasure the two felt over something as simple as that was undeniable and irreplaceable. His grip on her tightened and he began to lead her over to the bed – his bed – while simultaneously removing her clothing.

It was only when her knees brushed against the foot of the bed did Bridgette finally turn around and
lock eyes with him. She felt like a different person in her dreams, someone entirely sexual and comfortable with the amount of sexuality that was consuming her. Maybe it was Marcus that had turned her into this. Maybe it was the mark that was causing her body to act the way it was. Bridgette could care less; she wanted him and she wanted him now.

With incredible speed, she reached up and slid his motorcycle jacket off his shoulders before pulling anxiously at his wife beater and getting rid of that as well. Her fingers, as they always seemed to crave to do, began to caress the muscles that composed his body; feeling them twitch underneath her touch gave her a sense of empowerment, and it wasn't long before his belt clattered to the floor.

Marcus reached out and circled her waist once again, pulling her even closer to him before his lips descended and captured hers. Bridgette kissed back with as much fervor as possible, and sooner rather than later, both of them were completely nude, adjacent to the bed but not yet occupying it, caressing each other's bodies as though they knew them like the back of their hand. And they probably did.

Suddenly, Marcus pulled away, but his presence didn't exactly leave her. Instead, he locked eyes with her, searching for something, though he couldn't say as to what he was searching for. "Do you trust me?" he asked her, raising his eyes slightly to indicate that he was serious in getting a response from her.

The question caught Bridgette off guard, but it didn't take her too long to nod the affirmative. To make sure he took her answer seriously, she murmured, "Yes."

Marcus stared at her long and hard for another moment before leading her onto the bed silently. With certain resolve, he positioned her so that she was on her knees, and she let him, wanting nothing more than to aide his pleasure. He knelt behind her, placing his hands firmly on her hips, admiring the gentle sway of her back, before pushing into her from behind.

He wanted to bury himself as deeply as he possibly could, and he knew that by entering her from this angle, he could feel the center of her core. Her breath hitched, and at first, he thought that maybe he had hurt her.

It wasn't until Bridgette urged him to go faster did he realize she wanted him to touch her in this way just as badly as he wanted to. And so he did.

In and out, in and out, as his hands tightened around her. He could hear her breathless and whimpering, wishing he could see her face and look into those eyes. That was the only problem with this particular position.

"
Don't stop," she begged in a whisper. "Please don't stop."

There it was; he felt her muscles constrict tightly against him and he knew she had reached her climax. He continued his ministrations, harder and faster, wanting to feel her lose control around him. Soon, he, too, joined her, releasing himself into her as he felt his body involuntarily twitch with ecstasy.

When he finished, he collapsed on top of her, though he was careful to ensure she wouldn't have to endure the majority of his weight. For a moment, neither of them spoke. Marcus brushed her hair away with his hand, and then softly began to kiss Bridgette's shoulder blade as she felt herself slowly start to drift off…

Bridgette immediately shot up in bed, panting with sweat droplets rolling down her face. She glanced out her window and realized she should be getting up soon anyways, but instead of doing so immediately, she let everything sink in as she tried to catch her breath. She wondered if the reason for her erotic dreams were because of Marcus, or maybe it was her subconscious mind telling her she desired him. Maybe she missed him and needed to feel… complete in order to function, and to do that in her current predicament, dreaming was the only way to release such desires.

Did that mean Marcus felt the dream as well? Did he have the same sorts of dreams? She didn't know, and she wasn't willing to drive outside of Somerset to ask Marcus himself.

After another few moments where she managed to get a grip on her emotions, Bridgette finally stood and started getting ready for work. She was frustrated as she began to dive into her closet because due to the fact that she couldn't go out into the field anymore, she had to dress somewhat formally. She managed to find a somewhat nice outfit - black slacks with a pink and
white collared shirt – and after throwing on some mascara and pulling her hair into a bun, she ate a rushed breakfast, brushed her teeth and left the safety of her home.

The dream continued to haunt her all throughout the day at work until she finally told Kendall about it. She didn't exactly go into detail, but she made sure that she stressed the fact of just how real it seemed, that in her dream, she was conscious and could feel everything, even now…

"We need to go out tonight, Kendall," she mumbled, about to run her fingers through her hair but remembered her hair was pulled into a bun. Kendall pulled an enigmatic face as she bit into her tuna salad sandwich that did not go unseen by Bridgette whatsoever. "What? We were going to go out tomorrow.  Why not push it up a night early?"

"Why do you want to go out tonight" Kendall asked, perking her brows as she locked eyes with her friend.

"I just don't want to think about Marcus anymore. I just don't want to…" Bridgette let her voice trail off and her eyes drop to her untouched cup of coffee. She didn't even drink coffee and she had no idea why she thought it was a good idea to pour some if it would just end up cold.

Kendall tilted her head slightly to the side. "Okay," she finally agreed. "I think Nocturnal just opened. It's supposed to be this new trendy night club. I'm sure we could use our status as NDS agents to cut through the line and maybe even get in free, but Bridge, I'm warning you, this whole plan of not thinking about Marcus is not going to work. You're bonded with him. You're
connected
to him. Nothing – no nightclub or dancing - is going to change that."

"I know," Bridgette murmured, nodding. "But even forgetting temporarily is enough for me."

When Bridgette got home that evening, she ate a light dinner of salad and water before heading into her bathroom to take a long shower. She didn't want to eat too much given the fact that she was intending to dance for the majority of the night, and if she felt bloated or full, she might not enjoy herself as much otherwise.

In the shower, she made sure she thought long and hard about everything that had happened to her over the past couple of days.
Dr. Gupta warned her that after physically consummating the bond between her and Marcus, they would be even more strongly connected than they already.  This, in turn, meant that he could get into her head, he could feel things that she was feeling. Did it work in the reverse? She wasn't exactly sure, but she decided to try and find out. As the warm water tumbled out of the showerhead and roll down her skin, Bridgette closed her eyes and focused on Marcus. But after a moment of trying, there was no result. Bridgette couldn’t see into his mind to know what he was thinking or feeling. Maybe it only worked one way, or maybe it only worked for males or maybe it only worked because he was a werewolf and she was a human. There were too many possibilities and too complicated to think about right now, especially given the fact that she was currently in the shower.

The moment
Bridgette turned off her water, the doorbell rang. Her lips perked up, and she quickly wrapped a towel around her body as she all but dashed to her front door. Instead of immediately opening it, however, she made sure that she looked through the peephole to ensure that it was her friend and not… someone else.

When she saw that it was Kendall, she smiled with excitement and opened the door before warmly ushering her friend in. Kendall was dressed impeccably in a purple, long-sleeve t-shirt dress that draped over her body.
  It was somewhat loose on top (hence the t-shirt dress mentality), but the skirt attached to the dress was short and tight. She was wearing black pumps, and her short, brown hair was straight with a slight edge to it. Her makeup was much like her hair, edgy but fashionable, as it highlighted her eyes. She had three golden bracelets on her left wrist and a black clutch that matched her shoes.  Girls’ nights were the only times Kendall allowed herself to dress to flatter her body, to attain the confidence she should already have.

"Okay
," Kendall said, eyeing her friend's less-than-couture outfit. "I haven't checked up on Nocturnal's dress code policy or anything, but I think a towel is out of the question."

Bridgette rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless. "Context clues, Kendall," she said as she turned and headed into her room with Kendall in tow. "I just got out of the shower."

"Ooh!" Kendall exclaimed. "Okay then. You dry off. I'll pick out your outfit."

"I'm not exactly sure –" Bridgette said, about to protest, but Kendall waved her friend's worries away.

"Hey," she began, locking eyes with her friend. "You asked me to come over. You demanded we go to a nightclub. It’s only fair that I get to pick your outfit. Don’t you just trust me? You wanted to forget about Mister Marcus Sterling, right? Let me make you look even more irresistible than you already are, and I guarantee you will forget him but guys won't forget you."

Bridgette laughed at the notion, but rolled her eyes as she headed back into the bathroom. It took
twenty minutes before she dried off, though her body was still encompassed in a towel. Before she could get two steps out of the bathroom door, Kendall thrust the clothes she wanted Bridgette to wear for the evening and ushered her back into the bathroom. She looked down at the material after the door shut behind her, her lips twisting into a frown. Now where had this particular dress come from? She didn't remember buying it…

"Hurry up!" Kendall called from outside the door.

It only took a few moments before Bridgette stepped back out, her face unsure. However, Kendall squealed in delight and started talking about makeup, hairstyles, and accessories; things that Bridgette didn't really pay any particular attention to. Ignoring Kendall, she caught a glimpse of herself in her room's full-length mirror. Her hair was still somewhat damp, but not wet enough to affect the dress material in a negative way. The dress itself was a deep cranberry color, maybe even wine. It was an off-the shoulder dress, and the silky material clung to her shape. It was double-strapped, with thick straps fell off her shoulders and thin spaghetti straps that curved around her shoulders, and the length of the dress came to about mid-thigh. The skirt of the dress wasn't as tight as Kendall's, but it still revealed her curves.  Bridgette was glad Kendall chose her outfit tonight. Dressed like this, she might actually have a good time and forget about a certain someone. Admiring herself some more, she was interrupted by Kendall’s sudden focus on her.

Admiring herself some more, she was interrupted by Kendall’s sudden focus on her. “And now, onto the fun part,” she said with a glint in her eyes.

An hour later, makeup was added to Bridgette's look. Now that her hair had dried, Kendall tousled it so half of it was up while the other half was down. A choker hung around Bridgette's neck, and on her feet were gold gladiator sandals.

"Wow," Kendall murmured as she took a step back in order to admire her work. "Bridge, you look…" She let her voice trail off and Bridgette felt herself blush.

"Oh, be quiet," she said, but couldn't hide her smile if she tried. "Come on. Let's go have the night of our lives."

Nocturnal was a small, one-story building that blended in with its urban surroundings.  Had it not been for the neon red sign stationed on the roof, many people would have passed it over as another abandoned building.  Music could be heard from the sidewalk, and if anyone leaned against the dark bricks, they would surely feel the vibration of the music.  There was a long line that wrapped around the block – opening nights were always crowded at the club scene in Somerset – and two bouncers on either side of the entrance doors, all shaved heads and muscle.

As Kendall had brainstormed, the host – a scrawny man with a clipboard dressed in an expensive suit - allowed the two women access into the nightclub without having to wait in line or even pay. The lights were dim unless a particular song called for a strobe light - the music was loud, and the vicinity itself was crowded. Bridgette could already feel herself start to sweat and she had just gotten her hand stamp – a crescent moon on the inside of her right wrist.  Her nose twitched at the stale smell of smoke and cheap alcohol.  When her eyes landed on the dance floor, however, her hear sped it.  It was small and compact, already filled with a sea of people, but she was ready to jump in herself.  She needed this.

Thankfully, it didn’t take them
long before they headed to the dance floor, completely losing themselves within the music.  This would free her mind.  This would be the release she had been craving since leaving – escaping – from Marcus.  Now she could forget, even temporarily, all the conflicting feelings associated with the wolf.

---

Marcus could tell she was getting ready for something formal due to how nervous yet excited she was. He could also feel something else, a feminine presence with Bridgette as well.
What was she doing? What was she getting ready for?
He cocked his head to the side, leaning deeper into the cushy chair as he proceeded to think more on the matter. What if… what if she was going on a date with someone?

The thought took Marcus by surprise and he felt himself growl at the mere thought that she was seeing someone else when she already belonged to him. He tilted his head up and smelled the air, hoping to catch the scent of vanilla. He knew that since they had partaken in the act of making love – having sex – he could pick her scent out with the mere thought of her, despite her distance. Instantly, his senses were filled with solely her, but she seemed to be surrounded by alcohol, cigarette smoke, and something else… He closed his eyes, trying to concentrate on where she could possibly be…

A club. She was at a club.  A new one, judging from how crowded it seemed to be.  She kept bumping into people.  Was there a new club opening up this weekend…? Nocturnal. What the hell was she doing there anyways?

Maybe… maybe he should check up on her to ensure she wasn't doing anything stupid.

Marcus grabbed his motorcycle jacket and headed out the door. Normally, he would’ve rationalized some more before he made a move, but this time he didn't need to. His mind was set, and seemed to be whenever it concerned her.

I
t took him thirty minutes of weaving in and out of traffic and breaking all speeding laws to get to the club from the manor even though it was located in the heart of the city.  He hadn’t even prepared proper club attire due to his hasty departure that all he was wearing besides his jacket were jeans and a wife beater.  His hair probably looked like shit too, thanks to the helmet he always wore.

He pushed through the line, offered the bouncer two hundred dollars, and stepped inside. All around women were scantily dressed and sleazy men were hanging on them, desperate for a night filled with forgetful passion and quick, self-gratification. Pushing through the crowd, he paid them no mind. A few women asked to buy him a drink while some even asked him to dance. Forging on, he didn't even hear them. His hazel eyes were searching through the crowd accumulated on the dance floor until he caught sight of a familiar head of hair, and then he could smell her…

Marcus's eyes narrowed when he realized she was not dancing alone, but with some guy holding onto her body like it was his for the taking. He continued to walk further into the crowd. It was only when he caught sight of the man attempting to continuously kiss Bridgette's neck that he felt his eyes narrow and a silent growl vibrate through his throat. He might have felt some reprieve seeing how Bridgette tried to shove the man off of her, but the fact that he was refusing to leave caused his anger to increase.

He didn't even hav
e to think. Marcus grabbed the man by the back of the shirt and easily tossed him into the crowd without a second glance.  The crowded didn’t even move, didn’t even make a big deal about it, as though fights were commonplace.  Without warning, he grabbed Bridgette’s forearm and yanked her towards him, his hazel eyes narrowed, burning, and nothing short of furious.