Let Me In (7 page)

will
dare to pick myself up off the floor and meet my challenges and destiny head first.  I can be strong for that. 
              As I let the last chords echo throughout the bar, I stand and nod my appreciation to the crowd.  My face breaks into an ear-splitting grin as I make my way back to my table.  Tuck pushes his chair back quickly and stands to wrap his arms around me. 
              “You’re amazing,” he whispers in my ear, his breath warm and pleasant. 
              “Thanks, Tuck.  You’re too sweet.”  I try to keep my response light-hearted as I feel a shiver run down my body.  I like Tuck, but I definitely can’t get involved with a guy.  Especially a guy like him.  He is too beautiful, and the sweet badness that is lurking underneath his cool exterior is something that I know could be detrimental to my heart.  But damn, he is just so sexy. 
Friends, we are just friends,
I tell myself.  Friends are better than nothing, right?  I decide right then that some barriers need to be constructed in order to keep Tuck from getting too close.  I swore to myself long ago that relationships weren’t for me.  Nobody would ever possibly want to be involved with me, so it was best to guard myself.  And guys would eventually turn on you and make your life hell.  If I hadn’t even been able to depend on the one man in my life who should have always been there for me, then some college guy that I met in a bar definitely wasn’t going to earn my trust.  With that in mind, I harden my heart and my resolve. 
              “I’m going to get a drink.  Be right back.”  I grab my guitar case and make my way to the bar, handing the case over to Kai for safe-keeping once again.  “Shots, Kai!” I yell out as I plunk myself on a barstool.  Within a minute, Kai sets down two shot glasses filled with tequila.  I grin at him.  “You know me so well, Kai.”
              He raises his shoulders in a shrug.  “What are you drinking to tonight, Kor?”
              What am I drinking to?  Did he want the long version or the short?  I was drinking to get the feel of Tuck’s hug and the warmth of his breath in my ear out of my head.  I was drinking to my past, to my mom, to my guitar, to my future, to not dating.  Mostly I was drinking to forget.  Something told me that Kai probably didn’t want to know all of that, so I simply answer, “To the future,” and slam the shots back one after another.  I grimace as the amber-colored fire burnt its way down my throat. 
Damn, that’s good.
  “Kai, bring me another round!”
              “I’ve already got them ready for you, sweet thing.”  I look down and the glasses are already in front of me, waiting to join the other two.  “So, you and Tuck?  What’s going on with you two?  I’ve known him for awhile and I can’t say that I’ve ever seen him spend time with a girl like he does with you.”
             
What is up with everybody thinking we are a couple?
  I shake my head at his incorrect assumption.  “We aren’t together like that.  We’re just friends.”  Kai gives me a shrewd look and I have the sudden fear that he can see through me to the lies that I hide inside.  I’m afraid that he can see my true feelings for Tuck.  But thankfully, he drops the subject and nudges the shots closer to me.
              “Thanks, Kai.  You are a true friend.”  I slam those two shots back just as quickly as I did the first ones, then look to my right as I feel somebody touch my elbow. 
              “Hey, there.  You want to dance?”  I had been the last open mic performer, and now the dj had a dance song pulsing through the bar.  I look my new friend up and down.  He is definitely attractive with his wavy brown hair and dark brown eyes.  A crisp polo shirt stretches across his chest to meet a pair of designer jeans. He has a preppy, frat boy look to him that has never quite appealed to me.  I find myself comparing him to Tuck.  I see no visible tattoos, and his arms and chest reveal muscles, but he isn’t nearly as ripped as Tuck.  I mentally shake my head.  I need a guy like this tonight, somebody who resembles Tuck in no way.  I can admit to myself that I find Tuck entirely too attractive and appealing.  I am constantly having to remind myself to be on my guard around him.  Since this guy appears to be the complete opposite of Tuck, I absolutely want to dance with him.
              “Sure,” I reply and give him my hand as he leads me to the dance floor.  I stumble a bit when I jump off my stool.  Those four shots of tequila are already making my mind a bit hazy and jumbled.  He grabs my arm to steady me and smiles.  Something about his smile is off to me, but I attribute it to my already slightly inebriated state. 
              “My name is Colin,” he informs me as he pulls me close to him when we reach the dance floor.
              “Nice to meet you, Colin.  I’m Kori.”
              “Yeah, I remember from you singing.  You have a really sexy voice, Kori.  I would love if you would sing to me one day.”
             
Wow, that’s original.  He could at least come up with a better pick up line than that.
  I just smile at him and give a suppressed groan as he winks at me.  I decide to be thankful that I am well on my way to being drunk, or I probably wouldn’t be able to dance with Colin.  He just seems to be too much of a prick.  Since I have tequila coursing through my body, my hips mold to his as he grinds into me in beat with the song.  I let his hands roam down my back, lingering just a bit too long at my breasts as they make their way down to the small of my back.  I don’t stop him as he grabs my ass with both hands and pulls me into his groin.  I close my eyes as he runs his tongue down my neck and nips at the hollow where my throat meets my shoulders.  I want to stop him, but I don’t.  I want it to be Tuck’s arms that I’m dancing in, but it’s not.  It’s this douche Colin.  I wind my arms around his neck and pull him closer to me. 
              My eyes fly open when Colin is suddenly pulled away from me.  Tuck stands glowering in front of Colin.
              “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?  Get off her!”  Tuck looks menacingly pissed off.  I would have been terrified if that rage had been directed at me. 
              “My bad, Tuck.  I-I didn’t know she was with you.  S-s-she didn’t say anything about it.”  Colin can’t get the words out fast enough.  He has his hands in front of him in a position of surrender as he quickly backs away.  He appears to be panicked and can’t get away from my unwelcome rescuer quickly enough.  When he has completely disappeared from sight, I turn toward Tuck in anger.
              “What the hell, Tuck?  What do you think you’re doing?  You had no right to come over here.”  I jerk away from him as he reaches for my arm.  I almost fall from the sudden movement but quickly steady myself and push my way to the bar.  I don’t care who I shove out of my way in my tequila-fueled rage. 
              “Kai, I need my guitar.”  I wait just a minute as he hands my case across the lacquered bar.  I silently grab it and continue pushing my way to the door.  I reach the door and stumble out of it into the humid night air.  By this point my legs are feeling extremely unsteady, so I hurry to my truck.  I jerk open the door and toss my guitar into the back seat.  In the back of my alcohol-logged mind, I am aware of the fact that I don’t need to drive in my condition.  However, the rage that Tuck worked up in me renders me incapable of making sane decisions.  I slam the door and fumble to fit my key into the ignition.  I miss the ignition slot, and my keys strike the floorboard.  I curse as I reach down to grab them, but before my fingers can snatch them up, another hand seizes them out of my grasp.
              “You’re not driving yourself home, Kori,” I hear Tuck growl from the passenger seat.  “Get out and let me drive you.”
              “Go fuck yourself, Tuck,” I snap at him.  “I can do whatever the hell I want to do.” 
I stare straight ahead petulantly, waiting for Tuck to place my keys in my outstretched hand.  I yelp in surprise when I feel myself being lifted out of the driver’s seat.  Tuck quickly carries me to the passenger side and dumps me into the seat.  He reaches across me and buckles the racing harness across my body.  My fingers are tingling from the tequila and prove themselves utterly useless as I struggle to unlatch the harness.  I sag against the seat in defeat.  “You’d better not fucking wreck my truck, you fucking fucker.”

9

Tuck

              I can’t remember the last time I was so damn angry.  I watched Colin approach Kori at the bar and ask her to dance, and I admit that I had been surprised when she agreed to go with him.  I knew we were just friends, but it felt as if there was something different tonight.  I could swear that I even felt her shiver when I hugged her after her performance, a performance that was earth-moving to me.  I could see her vulnerability on stage when she sang.  She always comes across tough and hardass, but all her walls were completely torn down when she had that guitar.  She blew me away. 
              She was also without a doubt the sexiest damn thing I had ever seen.  Tonight she was wearing a short, faded denim skirt and a snug v-neck t shirt.  She had on a pair of broken in cowboy boots, and my eyes had glazed over as I mentally ran through all the things that I wanted to do with her and those boots. She seemed entirely unaware of just how beautiful and sexy she was, which only added to her sexiness. The way we sat at the table and talked before her performance was unusual for me.  Usually all of my conversations were held with the intent of getting a girl into bed, and I never had to talk for very long.  Even though I still desperately wanted Kori, I found myself enjoying just talking with her.  We connected effortlessly.  Even though we had spent a lot of time together in the past weeks, all of that time had been by ourselves.  I had been worried that our relationship would be strained once we got around people, but like everything else with Kori and me together, it was perfect.
                Then I look up and see her and Colin as he dry-humps her on the dance floor.  She is doing nothing to stop him.  Hell, she even seems to be encouraging him.  My eyes fill with red as my body fills with rage.  Before I know it, I snatch Colin away from her and prepare to pound his ass in the ground.  Lucky for him, he stammers an apology and gets the hell away from her.  I was unprepared for her sudden anger as she gets her guitar and stalks out of the bar. 
What the hell does she think she’s doing?  She’s too drunk to drive.
  I wave goodbye to our table and take off after her.  When I finally get her buckled in the passenger’s seat, she turns to me with anger flashing in those beautiful green eyes. 
              “You’d better not fucking wreck my truck, you fucking fucker.”
              I chuckle at her words.  “Does drinking bring out your potty mouth, or do you always try to see how many times you can say fuck in one sentence?”  I watch as her body tenses and prepare myself for the onslaught of her anger.
              “You had no right, Tuck.  I can dance with whomever the fuck I want.  Got that?”
              I interrupt her before she could get too wound up.  “Dance?  Is that what you call that?  He was practically fucking you on the dance floor.  His hands were all over you.  He’s an asshole; you can do better than him.”
              “You don’t know me!  You don’t know that I can do better or not.”  She screams at me as she explodes in anger.  That strikes me as an odd statement.  Of course she can do better; I don’t know any guy who is even worthy of her.  “We are friends, Tuck,
just friends!
So what right do you have to tell me who I can be with?”  Her hands form tight fists in her lap as she works to control her temper.
              “I’m sorry, Kori.  I thought we were
friends
,” I spit the hateful word out at her bitterly. “I was trying to save you from a guy who is known for banging every chick that looks his way.  I didn’t realize that was the type of guy that you wanted.”  A part of me is aware that I don’t have very much room to criticize Colin about that, a fact that Kori quickly pounces on.
              “Oh, and I guess that you are just a blushing virgin.  Everybody knows your reputation, Tuck.  You’re just as bad as Colin is.”
              I suck in a furious breath.  “Don’t you ever fucking compare me to him, Kori.  I’ve never slipped roofies into a girl’s drink before.”  I watch as she pales.  Finally, something is getting through to her. 
              “What are you talking about?”  Her question comes out softly, startling me.  I had grown accustomed to her screaming as she verbally attacked me.
              I sigh and look out of her windshield.  “We were at a frat party my sophomore year when I caught him slipping it into a girl’s drink.  I beat his ass, and I’ve hated him ever since.”  I glance over at her in time to see her duck her head.  I can see her jaw tense as she works to control her emotions.  When she speaks again, my ears strain to hear what she says.
              “I didn’t know.  Thank you, Tuck.  I’m really sorry.”  She looks like she has swallowed castor oil as the apology is obviously hard for her to verbalize.  I place my hand on her knee and squeeze. 
              “It’s okay, Kori.  Let’s just get you home.”  I crank the truck and pull out of the parking lot. 
              Kori remains silent the entire drive home.  She appears to be lost in deep thought as she stares out of her window at the dark landscape.  I could almost swear that I see a tear streak down her cheek, but when I reach out to her, she flinches away.  I sigh in frustration, afraid that I have completely fucked up the friendship that I have with this beautiful, maddening girl.   Finally, we reach the house that she shares with Avery and Chelsea.  As soon as the engine is quiet, Kori throws open the door.  She fumbles with the harness as she struggles to unlatch her restraints.  I move to help her, but she sullenly pushes my hands away. 
              “Just leave me alone, Tuck.  I don’t need your help.”  She jumps out of the seat and immediately pitches head-first onto the driveway.
             
Dammit, this girl is determined to piss me off tonight. 
I rush around the truck to help her up.  I try to ignore the fact that her short denim skirt is hiked up, allowing me to see just a glimpse of her black lacy panties.  I grit my teeth together as I try to get my body under control. 
Don’t be an asshole, Tuck.  She’s drunk; you can’t take advantage of her like that.
  Sometimes I really hate my conscience; it doesn’t always get listened to, but apparently it is screaming at me this time.  Something about Kori has gotten under my skin. 
              I pick Kori up and start walking to the house.  “Wait, I forgot Patsy!  I can’t leave her out here,” Kori frantically exclaims.
              “Who the hell is Patsy?”
              “My guitar,” she explains as if that was the most rational statement she had made tonight.  I assure her that I will bring it in as soon as I get her inside. 
                Kori is nowhere to be found when I return to the house with Patsy.  I walk down the hallway, sure that she is most likely getting ready for bed.  As I push open the door to her bedroom, I see Kori sprawled face-down across her bed, dead to the world.  I pull off her cowboy boots and place them in her closet.  Then I gently move her so that she is under the covers.  I know she won’t be very comfortable in her clothes, but she will be furious if she awakes to discover I have undressed her.  Even though my fingers are itching to reveal the utter perfection that I know is underneath her clothes, I have to rein myself in.
              Kori intrigues me.  Chase was right, it was incredibly hot the way she was ready to pounce all over Marcie.  I don’t know the history that is between the two of them, but obviously Marcie had done something in the past to get on Kori’s bad side.  She comes across as a hardass and straightforward, but then she showed so much vulnerability tonight.  I cringe to think about what could have happened if she had gone home with Colin.  I would have killed him if he had hurt her. 
              I softly sit down on the edge of the bed and watch her sleep.  She looks so defenseless.  My eyes stray around the room and land on a picture on her dresser.  I walk over to get a closer look.  The silver frame holds a black and white photo of what is obviously a younger Kori and her mom holding a guitar.  Her mom was breathtakingly beautiful; Kori looks so much like her.
              “What are you doing?”  I set the framed photo back on her dresser as I turn to look at Kori.  She is glaring at me indignantly. 
              I gesture toward the picture.  “Is this your mom?”
              Her eyes soften as she nods her head.  I stop the question that is forming on my lips when I see the look of sorrow that settles onto her face.  I rush to her and sink onto the bed beside her.  “What’s wrong, Kori?”  I hate to see her beautiful face look so sad.
              She shakes her head as she mutters, “Nothing.  I’m fine.  I guess all that tequila is just making me a little off.”
                I lean back and prop myself against her headboard.  It is scrolled ironwork and isn’t exactly the most comfortable position, but it’s okay since I am beside Kori. I pat the spot beside me and give her a grin.  She glares back at me and mumbles something under her breath about me being a bossy bastard, but she scoots herself into position beside me as I drape my arm over her shoulders.
              “Shit, Kori, you are one feisty drunk.  Are you always like that?”
              She fidgets nervously beside me.  “Not always.  Just when it’s hard stuff.”  She waves her hand in front of her face.  “But I don’t want to talk about that, Tuck.  Let’s just let it go.”
              I point toward the picture of her mom on the dresser.  “Your mom was beautiful.  You look so much like her.  She would be so proud of the way you sing.”
              Kori stiffens beside me.  She speaks so quietly that I almost miss her next words. “I don’t know.  I don’t think she would be proud of anything that I’ve done.”
              My heart breaks at her words.  I can’t imagine a parent not being proud of Kori.  She is so talented and full of spunk.  I have never met anybody quite like her.  I tighten my grip around her shoulders and give her a squeeze.  “I think you’re wrong, Kori.  There is no way on Earth that she wouldn’t be proud of you.”
              She glances at me questioningly.  “How do you know, Tuck?”
              “I know I haven’t known you for very long, Kori, but I know you pretty well,” I explain.  “I know that you’re the most talented singer and guitar player that I’ve ever heard.  I know that you know how to fix your own truck, and you can drive a totally badass motorcycle.  I know that you’re sarcastic and have a wicked sense of humor.  You’re a loyal friend and granddaughter, and you aren’t afraid to stand up for yourself when others are trying to put you down.  I also know that moms love their kids more than anything, and I’m positive that she would be so proud of the beautiful person that you are.”  I suck in a big breath and expel it slowly.  There are so many other things that I want to say to her, but I am afraid that I would run her off if I voice them.  I am well aware that we had made the decision to just be friends, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to be more for her.  Kori gets me in a way that lots of people don’t.  I find myself slipping into the real Tuck Hayes when I am around her.  I’m not who my dad expects me to be or who Chase expects me to be.  I am just me.  It’s a rare and beautiful thing when you find somebody who allows you to embrace the real you. 
              “Tuck?” Kori questions softly.  “Tell me about your mom.”
              “I don’t have very many memories of her, since she died when I was so young.  I hate that the only way I can remember what her smile looked like is from a picture.  I can’t remember her laugh or her cooking.  I do remember the song she used to sing me before bed each night, and I remember that she got really sick and couldn’t hold me the way I wanted to be held.  My dad made sure that I never forgot the good things that Mom used to do, even though I know that sometimes remembering was hard for him.  I mostly just remember that she was the most important person in my life, and then one day she was gone.”  I don’t know why I am explaining all of this to Kori; I never talk about this with anybody.  “How did your mom die, Kori?”
              My eyes meet Kori’s in time to see her brush away the tears that are making tracks down her face.  I brush her tears away with my thumb.  I can see the hurt in her eyes; there is something in her that causes her to ache.  I suddenly want to share that pain if she will let me. But something about Kori causes me to think that she isn’t big on appearing weak in front of people, and sharing her pain will certainly reveal her weaknesses.  Kori hides behind her badass persona, and I want to see the girl behind that.  I already think that badass Kori is sexy as hell, so I am positive that her other sides will be just as beautiful.  The key is going to be getting her to open up to me.
              “She was shot,” Kori whispers softly. 
                My heart aches for her as I rub my hand down her arm.  “That’s terrible, Kori.  I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”  I cringe at my lame response.  I don’t know how to react to her revelation. 
              Her next words come out in a rush.  “I lost everything the night she died.  Nothing in my life has ever been the same since then.  I almost died, and I lost the most important person in my life.”  Kori is absent-mindedly rubbing her side as she talks. 
              Her disclosure is getting more surprising by the moment, and I find myself curious as to what had happened.  I prompt her to continue talking.  A small part of me feels guilty that she is telling me this; I can’t help but wonder if she would be so forthcoming if she didn’t have alcohol to help bolster her.
              She continues telling her story, the words spilling out of her mouth as if she has been holding them in for so long that they are aching to be spat out like a bitter candy.  “My entire life, my father was abusive.  It was mostly my mom that he would hit, but if he was really mad, he would turn on me.  There were times when I would have to wear long sleeves in the summer to cover the bruises that he had put on my arms.  My mom tried her best to protect me, but he was careful never to go too far with her.  He would threaten to kill her if we left him, so she stayed.  There were days that I absolutely hated her for being so weak.  I didn’t understand why she stayed; I still don’t understand.”  She stops her monologue as her eyes stare at the framed photo on her dresser.  I can tell that her mind has drifted back to that horrific time as she relives the past.  Her hands clench into fists as she continues, and my stomach roils as I anticipate what she’s about to reveal.  “The day I turned sixteen, my mom had planned a special dinner for me.  She had cooked all of my favorite foods and had made me a red velvet cake.  We were waiting on my dad to get home so that we could celebrate; she assured me that he wouldn’t want to miss his baby’s sweet sixteenth birthday.”  She chuckles humorlessly and closes her eyes.  Her voice cracks.  “My dad walked in the door and saw the decorations and food.  The anger that crossed over his face was horrible.  He began yelling at my mom.  I still don’t understand why he was so mad at her, what set him off so quickly that night.  She told me to go to my room, she would handle it.  I couldn’t leave her; I was too scared for her.  I could tell that something was different about his rage this time. Then it was as if the world slowed down and stopped as he reached into the holster on his waist and pulled out his gun.  Before I knew it, he had shot my mom.  I remember screaming and launching myself toward her.  His second shot hit me in the side.  His third shot hit my mom again.”