Authors: J Q Anderson
Chapter 26:
Jake
As the next weeks pass, I have a good feeling this arrangement between
Natalia and I is going to work. She looks happy and so far she
’
s given me no indication that she wants anything
more. Her internship at the hotel leaves her little to no time off and our
schedules make seeing each other nearly impossible. When we finally get time
together, we gladly take what the other one gives and ask for no more. We are
both exhausted. I
’
m already patting myself on the
back because this is pretty close to perfect.
She switches her days off so she can help me with the opening of the
shop.
Double Post
is set up to open in two days. The concept I created
divides the store into two main sections: an area where we offer custom
surfboards featuring a few floor models with cutting edge designs, and a retail
section dedicated to water polo gear including apparel, high end sunscreens,
shampoos and other cosmetics designed exclusively for swimmers and water polo
players. It
’
s the only surf-shop of the
sort and I am pretty excited with the prospect. I have met most of the
retailers in the area and everyone
’
s been
great about spreading the word. Cardiff is a small community of entrepreneurs
and they welcome new concepts that are connected with the ocean and surf-lifestyle
in one way or another. Pete and Sydney have also been advertising my shop
within their water polo club as the best place to purchase dedicated gear, so
opening day is looking promising.
The day finally comes and a crowd hovers at the door even before we open.
Natalia helps me run through the last details and we are ready to go. Before we
open the doors for the first time I wrap her in my arms.
“Thank you, babe. It means a lot that you are here,” I tell her because
it
’
s true. Her face lights up like a Christmas tree
and she smiles.
Throughout the day I walk around the floor and shake hands with people as
they engage me in short conversations about the design of the store and the
products and services we offer. There are quite a few customers from Pete and
Sydney
’
s club. They are eager to meet me and get their
water polo playing kids
’
picture
taken with an Olympian gold medalist. As a gift for the store opening, Syd had
a few action shots blown out and framed from my days as a pro player. She
turned one of them into a wallpaper that panels an accent wall and I have to
admit that she did an amazing job. I am not thrilled at being the center of
attention, but my reputation as a player proves to be a great marketing tool
and I am thankful to Pete and Syd for everything they
’
ve done to make this dream a success.
Shit
.
I sound like an award winning speech.
Opening day is a smashing success. Pete, Syd, Natalia and I head to a
local bar for a celebration dinner. Natalia and Sydney hit it off the second
they met. I am glad Syd and Pete approve of Natalia, given that I spend the
only time off I have with her. Syd can
’
t help
herself and offers Natalia to introduce her to a few members of the club who
often hire a private chef for their dinners. Natalia laughs and reminds her she
’
s still only an intern.
By the time we leave the bar it is past midnight. Syd and Pete have to go
back to their babysitter and Natalia has to be at work early. We round the
corner to my car. The night is warm. Natalia smiles as the ocean breeze lashes
her hair onto her face.
“Why did you let me drink so much, Jake?” She laughs at her own wobbly
walk and it
’
s infectious. I scoop her in my
arms and kiss her, pressing her against my chest. Her mouth welcomes mine. It
is still sweet from the mojitos and it makes me want to kiss her all night.
“Jake, I
’
m proud of you,” she says
against my lips. “You
’
ve done it.
You made your dream happen.”
“So have you.”
She smiles. “Not
quite
. I
am only the chef
’
s apprentice. I have a long
road ahead of me.”
“You are on your way. Look at all the praise you
’
ve received from the management in just one
month. I have no doubt you will accomplish everything you set that beautiful
mind to.” I close my eyes and kiss her forehead.
“I hope so,” she whispers. And for some reason it makes me think she
’
s not only referring to her job. I curse myself
for letting my goddamn mouth run, then distract her with another kiss. We drive
back to her place and I invite myself for a sleepover.
In the morning she wakes me with a kiss. Her lips taste like coffee and
she smells fresh from the shower. I snake my arms around her back and bring her
down to the bed with me.
“Good morning. Are you leaving me already?” I kiss her again and she
relaxes in my arms.
“Jake. I can
’
t be late for work. The chef is
in a bad mood even when I get it right. I don
’
t want to give him any reasons to use me as his
doormat today.”
“Maybe I should come with you and have a word with him.” I frown in mock
irritation. Her eyes widen.
“What?
No
. Jake. Just… Please, babe. Let me go.” She laughs when I
don
’
t loosen my grip and she can
’
t move. When all her attempts to push me away
fail, she pouts. She knows I can
’
t resist
when she does that. I kiss her deeply and she moans.
“You are evil. I have to go.” She pushes off me, but can
’
t stop smiling. She looks happy. I get up from
the bed and kiss her once again before she leaves. We won
’
t see each other for another week. I have a three
day trip booked with Rachel, one of my clients in Boston. Natalia doesn
’
t know the details and she doesn
’
t ask me where I
’
m going, but I
’
m sure her mind doesn
’
t miss a beat. I haven
’
t seen any of my clients since I moved to San
Diego and I don
’
t want Natalia getting any
ideas that our relationship is turning serious. We
’
ve finally reached a point of balance and I don
’
t want to screw it up with unrealistic
expectations and sappy boyfriend shit.
Charming, Jake.
I meet Rachel on Tuesday at the Marriott in Copley Place in Boston. She
has a couple of dinners planned and a charity event at a museum. Like Tamara,
Rachel takes careful care of herself, and even though she
’
s north of forty, she hardly looks over
thirty-five. Rachel
’
s favorite
sport is hunting for rich husbands and she says I am a ‘delightful in-between.
’
Her red hair cascades down her back and she
flicks it back with a perfectly manicured hand. I can
’
t help thinking how she is the opposite of
Natalia in every way. Nothing Rachel does is spontaneous. Every single move she
makes is a step closer to what she wants. I have also never seen Rachel without
makeup, never smelled and kissed her after a workout as she tells me I
’
m disgusting, the way Natalia did in Aspen.
Shit
. Rachel
’
s a job and I don
’
t know why in the fuck I
’
m thinking about Natalia when I
’
m supposed to be fucking working.
The minutes drag and I resent the fact that instead of enjoying this trip
I am dreading it. My mind drifts to the shop and it is tough to stay connected
with what used to be my full time occupation. At the dinners, people talk about
things I could care less about and I wonder how I ever found any of this
remotely entertaining. The conversations are shallow and staged.
I make it through the first two dinners and by the time the third event
comes I
’
m ready to walk away from
Rachel the same way I did with Tamara. Come to think of it, I haven
’
t talked to Tamara since. I wonder if she
’
s already made Ryan my replacement. This would
normally bother me, but at the moment all that occupies my mind is how I can
get out of this trip with Rachel and go back home.
To her. You
’
re slipping, Jake
. The realization that my thoughts are not only
on the shop, but on Natalia is sobering. I can
’
t let that happen.
I don’
t
want to end up like my father.
An image of him broken and lost after my mother left barges in my mind
and the uneasiness in my chest churns like a giant meteorite.
Fuck, Jake. Keep this up and Natalia will walk away, too.
I push the uneasiness back to the dark place where it rose from and I
resolve to follow through with my work commitments. My conscience can fuck off.
But as the weekend progresses the sense of dread I feel expands. Even sex
with Rachel leaves me empty and for the first time since I started working as
an escort I feel like a whore. Every guy I know would give up his left nut to
fuck Rachel. So what the hell do I have to complain about.
Maybe it
’
s time for retirement.
Rachel wants to book our next trip together and I tell her I will call
her during the week. None of my clients know about my shop, or any other detail
of my personal life, so I keep my explanations vague.
As I fly home in my first class seat, I am convinced that at the very
least I need to take a break. After what happened with Tamara and almost again
with Rachel, I should step away from my activities as an escort, or I will burn
a lot of bridges. Deep down I know a break is not a smart option if I decide I
don
’
t want to retire. My clients will find my
replacement and I am not willing to start over.
I run over the many possibilities in my head over and over and by the
time I land I have made my decision to retire. The store had an incredible
start and even though I know sales will wind down after the novelty fades, I am
in no need of an additional income.
When I land I ask Pete to meet me for a quick drink so I can share the
news. He congratulates me.
“About time. You
’
re too old,
Jake,” he says, laughing it off. He
’
s not
all wrong. Even though I am barely over thirty, the demand for a young ass is
peaking among the forty year old clientele I cater to.
I resolve not to tell Natalia yet. I don
’
t want her to think I am ready to jump into
another kind of relationship. I don
’
t want
to be with other women, but I need to hold on to my independence. I tell Pete
to keep his mouth shut and not tell Sydney, since she and Natalia are quickly
becoming good friends. He tells me I
’
m an
asshole for keeping this from her, but agrees not to tell Syd, although he says
it would make Syd happy to know I
’
ve left
that lifestyle. Like Natalia, she
’
s always
hoped I would choose to do something else with my life.
The next few days I see Natalia almost every night. I let my clients know
about my decision to retire and put them in touch with Ryan. Tamara and I have
a long conversation. She was my first client and in great measure is
responsible for my successful career as an escort. She
’
s been a great source of connections and even
though things never got personal between us, I feel a deep sense of
appreciation for her.
Careful, Jake. That
’
s almost a feeling
.
A few texts from my other clients come through during the week, some when
Natalia and I are together. She knows I get messages from other women and doesn
’
t say anything, but every one of those times I
can see a clear change in her expression. Sometimes she simply gets up and
leaves the room. Afterwards we either get into an argument over something
stupid, or one of us makes up an excuse and goes home. I am glad I haven
’
t told her about my retirement. She
’
s getting a bit too possessive and it
’
s starting to piss me off.
Thursday I pick her up form work. I
’
m
waiting outside on a bench and she eventually walks out, talking to a guy in a
chef
’
s coat. He looks like he
’
s in his early thirties and smiles widely at her
as she places a hand on his arm. He
’
s
listening to whatever she
’
s telling
him, standing a bit too fucking close for a coworker. She kisses his cheek and
I close my hand into a fist as ire runs down my spine. Natalia turns in my
direction and waves at me when she sees me. I nod back and stand up, keeping my
eyes trained on that fucker as he gingerly walks away.