If My Heart Could See You (16 page)

“I am not a child to be treated so.”

“Then do not behave as one so I can do my best to heal your illness.”

She ignored his words and rose, slightly kneeling with him between her legs. She took her hands and smoothed his tresses back from his face in a gentle caress. He gave a sharp intake of breath as she began to touch him at her leisure. ’Twas apparent she approved of feeling a power that she could affect him so.

“You are mine,” she declared knowingly, “and mine alone.”

Dristan stared back at the seriousness in her eyes. “Aye, as you are and will be mine.”

“Then take me now, Sir Dragon.”

“Not today and not like this Amiria.”

“Please Dristan
. . . I want you and only you.”

“You know not what you say,
mon amour
,” he said, trying to calm his racing heart. God help him but his need to be inside her was beyond anything he had ever felt afore.

If Dristan had known her better, he would have realized from the stubborn tilt of her chin that Amiria would not have him gainsay her as she was wont to have her way. She leaned forward ’til her breasts caressed his chest. Enjoying the sensation it created, she captured his lips again in another searing kiss even whilst she began to lower her body to meet his own.

Dristan was so distracted by the enchantment she had woven around him that he did not realize what Amiria was about in her determination to carry out her desires had been met. ’Twas not ’til he felt himself entering her and breaking through her maidenhead, making them one, that the comprehension come to him full force. He heard her cry of pain and cursed his foolishness at what he allowed to happen. It came crashing down upon him like the fiercest of storms.

“Amiria!”

Too late, she wrapped her arms around his neck. She held on tightly almost in some attempt to protect him from the pain she felt. Her breathing slowed whilst she became accustomed to the sheer size of him. Dristan feared to move since he did not wish to cause her any further pain, so instead he held her close and whispered words in French to sooth her.

She at last raised her head and loosened her grip about his neck to look into the depths of his eyes. The smile she gave him melted the ice surrounding his heart. He only hoped and prayed she would one day forgive him.

“Now you are in truth mine, Dristan of Berwyck, and we are mated for all time and eternity like the dragons of lore, who but take one true mate for their lifetime,” she said with conviction. “Now make me burn for you, my dragon, as I know only you can and claim me as your own!”

His resolve broken since the damage was done, he told Amiria to hold tight as he rose with her still in his arms. Her legs fasten themselves securely around his hips. They never once broke contact whilst he carried her to his bed with her words to make her burn seared into his heart and, more importantly, into his very soul. Seeing the woman beneath him that had consumed his own dreams for days, he lowered his head and sealed his fate with a hungry kiss. She returned it just as greedily and clasped him tightly to her as if she would never let him go.

Dristan took the remainder of the day and far into the evening to do just as she had asked somehow feeling that he, too, had been burnt into her very soul. ’Twas not ’til the moon was high in the midnight sky that they at last were both completely sated and at long last slept peacefully still entwined in each other’s fierce embrace.

Nineteen

Amiria began to rouse from one of the most incredibly delicious dreams she had ever experienced in all of her ten and nine years. Oh, to have such a night in truth as she had spent with the phantom of her dreams. Heat rose to her cheeks in a becoming blush at the remembrance of how she had lost all inhibitions by behaving so wantonly. She never would have dared such had she been awake.

She snuggled deeper, bringing herself closer to the warmth beside her and inhaled deeply of a scent that, although unfamiliar, was most pleasant to her senses. Was it perchance just a figment of her imagination that it felt as if a well formed muscled arm embraced her to keep her in her current placement? As Amiria became more fully awake, she flinched. Surely ’twas a leg not her own that her naked toes were idly rubbing up and down against like a lover’s caress.

Amiria suspiciously opened one violet eye and took in the sight of Dristan lying next to her. Her mouth hung open in a silent O of surprise of whom she beheld afore her. ’Twas true and not a vision! She was molded up against him if she were an extension of his own warm skin. One of her hands rested upon his chest and she felt the steady beat of his heart beneath her palm. He, on the other hand, lay upon his back with one arm extended above his head; the other held her firmly in place as if afraid he might lose something most precious to him. She could hardly believe what she beheld as a soft snore came from his slumber.

She was not sure if she was more outraged or embarrassed as she remembered her actions, knowing she had initiated her own demise of her lost virginity. She began to disentangle herself only to realize the length of her tresses were firmly trapped beneath her dragon. God’s Blood, had she really uttered those words to Dristan, all but daring him to claim her as his own? She had obviously become her own worst enemy since she had encouraged him with her words and actions. ’Twas more than apparent, since she lay naked next to him, that Dristan had indeed laid claim to her long into the evening hours. If she remembered correctly, and she was afraid to admit it even to herself, she, too, had enjoyed their coupling ’til sheer exhaustion overtook them both.

Amiria attempted once more to rise only to realize in horrid fascination that Dristan automatically tightened his arm about her. His snores suddenly ceased and he opened a bleary eye to stare at her.

“Come, Amiria, and rest yet awhile,” he whispered huskily, “’tis frightfully early to be about the morn after such a night as ours! I am still most weary.”

Amiria watched in fascination as he closed his eyes, expecting her to obediently obey him. He had all but dismissed her! Unable to hold her temper any longer, she released her outrage with a well-aimed fist into his rock hard belly. His eyes flew open with a grunt of unexpected disbelief. She was momentarily satisfied ’til he moved with lightning speed and she quickly found herself pinned beneath him with her arms extended over her head. She tried to find her voice and the anger she had felt but a moment afore yet failed given the delightful intimacy of her situation.

“What was that for?” he demanded sharply.

“How can you ask that of me?”  Her chest rose and fell rapidly, as she looked into the depths of his steel grey eyes. Desire coursed through her veins for a taste of what he had given her the night afore. She was further undone when he began to caress her hair ever so gently.

“You sorely test my patience
, Amiria,” Dristan murmured, “especially when I had planned to give you time to get used to the idea of us as husband and wife.”

“Surely you jest, my lord, if you think we shall wed,” she said defiantly.

He gave her a smirk that she had come to know all too well, usually when they were out in the lists. “And surely you realize that I would do nothing less than wed thee once I took you to my bed.”

She quickly gazed around the chamber and saw that she was indeed not in her own room. Still, this changed nothing to her thinking. “I know you not well enough that I would pledge my troth to you.”

“You know of me,” he drawled lazily with another smile that spoke more than any words could reveal.

Amiria frowned in puzzlement. Was that a hint of hurt she detected in his words or just conceit, thinking how she must be pleased with him? She was so very confused! “Nay I do not, my lord. I know you not at all.”

Apparently conceding the battle of wills at least temporarily, Dristan rose from the bed and began to don his garments. Once he was fully clothed, he built up the fire to take the morning chill from the room. The task did not take long and Amiria watched his every move with uncertainty, not wanting to admit where her course in life would now lead.

He at last turned his attention back towards her, and Amiria’s breath caught in her throat from the intensity of his gaze. Dristan stood afore her as the embodiment of a champion knight favored by his king. Any woman in her right mind would be lucky to have a man such as him to call her husband. Yet, her stubbornness refused to allow another to make a life’s decision for her whether ’twas reasonable or not. She refused to remember that if her sire yet lived, she would have obeyed his commands of whom she was to marry without question. She gazed at Dristan, carefully trying to assess what was crossing his mind when he remained staring at her from across the chamber.

He moved in one fluid motion. She was his prey and he stalked her with a precision and a determination she had never witnessed afore. She could only imagine he was the same when it came to planning a strategy upon the battlefield. She drew the fur blanket up to her chin, as if that alone would save her from his steady gaze. He came and sat next to her but did not touch her.

“You know me better than most know those who would wed together,” he clarified. “Resign yourself to the idea that you shall be my wife.”

“How can you want me as your lady wife when you’ve only known me as a lad?” she protested.

“Surely even you know that is no longer the case,
ma cherie
,” he said as he reached out to touch her.

Amiria jerked away from his hand in distaste at how easily he thought she would comply with his demands. “Do not think that after one night you can be so free with me again. I will not allow it!”

Dristan gave a slight chuckle of amusement. “Your destiny has been decided Amiria and one that was truly never yours to control. You have a most fiery soul, my lady, and I would be hard pressed to find a more perfect match even if I searched ’til the end of time.”

“You still canna be free to touch me at your will!” she protested, knowing Dristan would do whatsoever he pleased.

He reached again towards her and although she slapped his hand away a second time, he gave her a devilish grin and tucked a lock of her hair behind one ear. “Touch you I will whenever I so wish it. Again I tell you to resign yourself to your fate, for we shall indeed wed.”

“But you must give me time,” Amiria pleaded. “Several months at the very least.”

“Take care of what you ask of me, my lady, for I will be honest with you . . . after what we have just shared, I will be hard pressed to get you afore a priest with all due haste.”

Amiria blushed crimson at his words. “You cannot plan to hold me to that which I thought was but a dream!” she retorted hotly.

“Aye, my sweet Amiria, I can and will do so,” he said, feeling her forehead and finding it cool to his touch. “Your fever has left you. ’Tis a good sign.”

“How long have I been sick, my lord?” she inquired hesitantly.

“’Twas longer than to my liking.” Dristan once more swept her with his intensive gaze. “Stay abed this day. I will see that food is brought to you so you may break your fast.”

Amiria allowed him to softly run his fingers through her hair once more. Memories of their night together flashed across her mind and she knew her cheeks blushed most furiously yet again. He seemed to know where her thoughts had taken her as his smile broadened. With another satisfied glance at her features, he at last rose from her side.

She watched his every move as Dristan strode about the chamber ’til he finally took up his sword, fastening it to the belt about his hips. He gave her one last satisfied look afore he took leave of the room.

’Twas not ’til her air had left her with a sudden whoosh that she realized she had been holding her breath. With a muffled groan, she threw the covers over her head and pondered the mysteries of her sorry life. She was beyond angry with herself for allowing her deepest most thoughts to become a reality even whilst she thought it all but a pleasant dream. Oh, how she hated that insufferable man!

’Twould be well into the afternoon afore she came to the realization that against her better judgment, her dragon had indeed made claim to her as his mate and had branded himself into her very soul.

Twenty

“I swear, if I must stay within this chamber one moment longer I shall scream from sheer boredom loud and long enough to bring down around us the walls of this keep,” Amiria ranted sullenly.

“Mayhap if you resume your stitchery, sister, ’twill soothe you,” offered Lynet whilst her fingers worked at the cloth in her lap.

Amiria quit her pacing to stare in annoyance at her sibling. “You know better than anyone that there is only one thing that will calm my nerves and taking up needle and thread is not it.”

“’Tis forbidden
. . . besides, you are to rest.”

“I have rested enough.”

”Mayhap ’tis so, but our Lord Dristan has ordered you to stay within your chamber so you must obey his will,” Lynet reminded her. She frowned in concentration as she began to loosen another botched attempt at mending the garment beneath her usually nimble fingers. “He would not be pleased to find you wearing hose and tunic instead of gown and wimple. You should not test him so.”

“I will wear what I choose as I have always done!”

“Be prepared then to pay the consequences when you are staring up into his angry eyes, for I do not believe you will like the view,” Lynet predicted, focusing on trying to undo a knot that appeared in her unraveling of the mess she had made. “Please sit, Amiria, for you are distracting me with your frantic stomping about, and I must now start this over yet again.”

“I am restless, and the pacing helps my already stretched nerves.”

Lynet ignored her sister’s words and continued her chiding. “Your behavior and rambling about Lord Dristan’s untimely demise has been far from ladylike. I can almost hear mother’s voice taking you to task for it.”

“I need fresh air,” Amiria complained, as she continued traipsing from one end of the room to the other.

“Then go to the window and open the shutters for goodness sake,” Lynet proposed in irritation of being cooped up with her sister.

“’Tis not enough.”

“’Twill have to be for that is all Lord Dristan shall allow you.”

Amiria whirled around at her sister and threw up her hands in frustration. “Say his name just one more time Lynet and I swear by all I hold dear I shall thrash you for it. I will not be held prisoner in my own keep!” she yelled.

“Surely you are not a prisoner, Amiria. It also does you no good to take out your irritation on me,” Lynet said, calmly putting down her mending. “I have seen the way he looks on you when he comes to see how you fare each eve. He only means to ensure you are healed from your illness. Besides . . . I like him.”

Amiria merely grumbled quietly about the nerve of the man that he should dare to order her about as if she would listen to him. ’Twas not as if they were already wed, and even if that miracle came to pass, she was not sure she would give him the satisfaction of obeying him. Lynet’s words, however, still hovered in the air like an unforeseen shadow of what was yet to come. She made her way to the window seat and opened the shutter as her sister had suggested. The slight amount of fresh sea breeze wafting its way to her senses was like a welcoming balm to her troubled soul. She soon became lost in thought as the past se’nnight’s flashed across her memory.

Dristan had come each eve to bring her supper, assuring himself she had eaten her fill and was on the mend. The silence stretched between them had been deafening and, if it had not been for Lynet and Patrick’s chatter, there would have been no conversation at all. Her hand trembled in recollection on how each night as he left, he lifted her numb fingers and placed a tender kiss upon them. If she closed her eyes and willed it hard enough, she could still see how the torches held in the wall sconces reflected the light onto his black hair whilst he looked down upon her from his towering height. She gave a hearty sigh and wondered when she had become such a dewy eyed imbecile, who could no longer put more than two words together once in his presence.

She slammed the shutter closed in disgust. “I’ve had enough of this confinement,” she decided and went to her chest at the end of her bed. Lifting the lid, she began to haphazardly throw gowns up over her head ’til she reached towards the bottom and found what she had earnestly sought. “Help me don this,” and she began to pull her armor out with a loud clank of metal as it hit the stone floor.

“He will not like it,” Lynet advised with a grim expression.

Amiria silenced her with a stony glare of warning ’til her sister held up her hands in defeat and began to help her with the tedious task of settling the heavy armor on her small frame. ’Twas not ’til the mail coif was placed on her head that she began to feel a bit of her old self. Her scabbard missing a most vital element, she began to search every corner for her sword.

“’Tis not here, Amiria,” Lynet said carefully in answer to the empty sheath Amiria all but shoved in her face.

“’Tis mine and I shall not allow him to take that which our father gave me,” Amiria retorted, as she reached for her helmet, pushing the mail coif from her head and pulling out her braid. “Why did he see fit to take my sword of all things?”

“Given your reaction, I believe he did what he thought best in his own behalf. I think he must care for you, Amiria,” Lynet chimed in. “He declared he would keep it so as not to offer you the temptation of sending him to keep the devil company and thereby depriving you of a husband.”

“I’ll send that horses arse to the devil alright and enjoy the pleasure of performing just such a task to rid me of that vermin!” she raged.

She left her chamber and sibling behind her in a huff of righteous determination to set things straight with the lord of the keep. She would begin by finding out where Dristan had put her sword. With her helmet under her arm, she made her way down the spiral turret and through the Great Hall with an unwavering stride to begin her search for her dragon. God help his sorry hide when she found him.