False Regret: Pikorua - Book 1 (34 page)

I
made coffee for everyone and then went to Cayden’s nursery. The hours seemed to
melt into each other, as I sat in the rocking chair, holding his blanket. The
sun was rising outside the window when Cade came looking for me. He didn’t
speak at first, his eyes were weary from stress and exhaustion. He crossed the room,
pulled me from the seat, hugging me so tight I thought my ribs would crack. I
returned the embrace as he started to cry, his body shaking with the effort.

“Shh
…” I said into his ear. “It’s going to be okay. I know we will find him.  We won’t
stop until we do.” I rubbed his back gently. “This isn’t your fault. I never
meant to infer such a thing. Cade, you need to rest. You’re injured and so exhausted.”

He
looked at me, his eyes bloodshot and weepy. “I can’t rest until we find him, I
won’t. Jesus, I’ve never felt this fucking desperate. How did this happen? God …
I am such a miserable failure, Ellia. You deserve so much better than me,
someone who can keep you and our child safe.”

“Stop
it, Cade. What could you have done besides lock us all in a steel room? Whoever
did this knew how to get in here undetected. It’s not your fault. We can’t
waste time on that way of thinking.” I kissed his lips softly. “You need to
rest now, though. You can’t think straight between the fatigue and your injury.
Please just lay down for a short while. I will stay vigil and wake you if
anything happens. You have a houseful of your Bureau people here; let them
handle it.” I could see the helpless frustration in his face. He was used to
being in control of situations, and this was one he had no clue with how to
deal. I took his hand and led him to our bedroom. “Lay down and close your eyes,”
I said, gently pushing him down on the bed. He fell asleep at once, and I
slipped out of the room.

I
returned to Cayden’s nursery for an hour or so and then decided to check in
again with the agents milling about my house. I went into the living room where
the activity continued. I approached Agent Roberts. “Do you know anything yet?”
I asked.

He
laid a gentle hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Ellia, we really don’t. A
neighbor saw a white Ford Flex parked down the street a little ways, and we are
pursuing that avenue right now. The abduction took place in broad daylight with
all your alarms activated, yet no one or saw or heard a thing. Cade had this
house locked down like Fort Knox, so someone knew your pass codes. We have
fingerprinted every room, and, so far, they match everyone they should.”

Something
about that struck me. “Whose prints did you find?” I asked, not knowing why,
but a nagging feeling was gnawing at the edges of my mind.

“Yours
and Cade’s are all over the house, including your mother’s. We also found Agent
Rodriquez and Agent Mendiola’s prints in the house, but Cade confirmed they had
been here.  Latent prints belonging to Matt Holloway existed as well.”

“Where
were Agent Mendiola’s prints?” I asked. “Were they in the baby’s room?” He gave
me an odd look but went to the table to review a piece of paper.

“Yes,
they were located on the door knob and the crib rail,” he said, looking up at
me.

“Agent
Roberts, Willow was never in Cayden’s nursery. I was still pregnant when she
was here, and we didn’t even own that crib yet. Her prints should not be in
there.” Hysteria bubbled under the surface. Roberts had a strange expression on
his face, eyebrows furrowed, as if he was trying to think of something. “You do
realize she and Cade were involved once don’t you?” I asked him. “Can we start
thinking outside the obvious conclusion about Camerson? This might not have
anything to do with him, and everything to do with her.”

“Ellia,
Willow Mendiola is a highly respected agent in the Bureau. I highly doubt she
has involvement in this. What would make you think so?”

“She
was jealous of me--of us. I had a weird feeling about her when she was here a
few months ago, but I chalked it up to my own insecurities.  Something bothered
me about her though. Cade accused me of being jealous and paranoid so I never mentioned
it again. I know the two of them still talk on the phone sometimes, but I didn’t
interfere.” I grabbed his arm. “My gut says she’s behind this somehow, please
don’t ignore me.”

He
looked dubiously at my clinging hand, so I removed it.  He sighed and gave me a
look of condescension.  “I’ll do whatever I can to help get your son back. I
understand that you are distraught and looking at every angle, but I highly
doubt Agent Mendiola has any involvement. To put your mind at ease, I will personally
check into it for you.”

“Thank
you. I trust you,” I said. He nodded and took out his phone, stepping away to
take a call.

I
called the hospital to check on my mother who was awake and feeling better
though suffering the effects of a drug she’d somehow ingested.  I explained
what was happening and what my suspicions were about Cade’s ex-lover.

“I
remember something, Ellia,” my mother said, excitedly. “I smelled cologne, or
perfume. It was like a flowery smell, very sweet, but strong. I had just put
the baby down, and I was feeling odd, dizzy. I remember thinking I was having
another stroke, and I wondered if that smell was a symptom. I blacked out right
after that.”

“Hold
on, Mom.” I approached Agent Roberts again. He was reading through a file. “My
mom remembered a smell from the abduction. Maybe it will have meaning to you.” I
handed the phone to Agent Roberts and watched his face as my mother relayed the
information. His eyes widened, and I knew there was recognition. It was
Willow’s perfume. She always wore it, even when she was in the safe house. Roberts
thanked her and handed the phone back to me.

“Don’t
get excited, it doesn’t mean anything, but I will check into it.”

I
said goodbye to my mother and sat on the couch, watching the agents work around
me, following leads on Amber Alert sightings and other tips. Roberts approached
me. “No one has been able to reach Agent Mendiola. I think you need to wake Cade.
Maybe he will know how to locate her.”

I
went to the bedroom and perched on the edge of the bed. I shook him gently. “Wake
up, Cade.”

He
bolted up at once. “What … what is it? Did they find him?” he asked, his blood
shot eyes coming fully awake.

“Not
yet, but we might have a lead,” He waited for me to tell him. “Willow’s prints
were in the nursery. To my knowledge, she was never in that room. When she was
here, Cayden had not even been born yet.”

“What
are you saying?”

“I
think she’s involved.”

“That’s
ridiculous,” said Cade, wiping the sleep from his eyes. “Willow would never do something
like this. Why would she?”

I
ignored him and pressed on with the information. “My mom remembered smelling a sweet,
 flowery cologne. Who wears that scent? You should know better than anyone,” I said.

“Bullshit,
Ellia, I know you don’t like Willow, and you are jealous as hell of her, but I
will never believe she would take our baby. What would be fucking point?” he
asked, his tone full of condescension and anger.

“Well,
I guess I don’t care if you believe me or not. Agent Roberts does, and that’s
what matters. As for the point? I’m sure your highly intellectual FBI brain can
figure that out,” I said, stalking out of the room, beyond irritated at him for
not even entertaining the possibility that our child was missing because of his
ex-girlfriend.  I heard him coming up the hallway behind me, but he merely
stepped around me and joined the other agents. I didn’t follow him, just
watched from a distance. He shared words with Roberts, and then got on his
phone again, pacing. I knew he was trying to reach Willow, but apparently there
was no answer. He gave me a look I couldn’t quite read. He shoved his cell in
his pocket, and I turned away from him, making a fresh pot of coffee. I had not
had any caffeine in months because of the pregnancy and then the breast feeding,
but I was about to drop from exhaustion myself.  I had only given birth four
days prior and my body was nowhere near recovered. My stitches from the
episiotomy ached as did my lower back. I downed two ibuprofen and chased them
with hot coffee, not bothering with cream and sugar. It wasn’t about taste at
that point, it was about energy.  Cade joined me in the kitchen, and I handed
him a cup of java.

“Thanks,”
he said, taking it from me and sipping it. “I’m sorry I got shitty with you.”

“It’s
okay,” I said, putting my hand on top of his. “I don’t want to fight with you,
but we have to explore every angle. This is not about petty jealousy. I’m not
trying to hurt you or make this harder for you.”

“I
know, Ellia. I am sorry.” He looked in my eyes. “I recognize the scent you
described. I had it developed for her from a company out west for Christmas
that year we were together. She’s worn it every day since then. Have you had
any sleep? You don’t look well.” I shook my head and cried again, my hormones
keeping the emotional roller coaster running. He held me close and stroked my
hair. “It’s your turn to rest. Forget the coffee and go lay down for a while,
okay?”

“I
won’t sleep, Cade. I can’t, not yet. This is the first lead that’s come, and I
want to stay informed,” I said, clinging to him.

“I
will wake you, just like you did me, if any new information arrives. Please,
Ellia, you went through a very hard labor, and you’ve had little rest. I need
you, so please take care of yourself.” He didn’t give me a chance to protest as
he took my hand and led me down the hall. It was his turn to push me down on
the bed. He sat on the edge of it after tucking me inside the covers. His hand
stroked my face before he leaned in and kissed me. “I love you,” he whispered
with his forehead touching mine.

 I
returned the words, and he left the room, shutting the door behind him. After
laying there a long time, I realized sleep was impossible. Gruesome scenarios
played in my mind, trying to drive me to madness. My cell phone vibrated in my
purse, and I got up to retrieve it from the dresser. It was a number I didn’t
recognize.

“Hello?”
Nothing but silence came at first, and then I heard Cayden crying, making milk
spew into my nursing bra as tears fell from my eyes. “Who is this? Where is my
son?”

“Your
son is fine, Ellia,” said Willow. “I will take excellent care of him. This is a
courtesy call.”

“What
do you mean? Why did you steal him?” I begged, fighting hysteria.

“I
loved Cade more than anything else in this world, and I wanted to marry him and
raise his children. But he couldn’t get over you. He couldn’t commit his heart
because of a lingering teenage dream of a girl he used to know. You don’t
understand how hard it was for me to let him go, and I only did so because I figured
once he finished the case, he would have the closure he needed. You ended up
with a boyfriend, and I believed you’d both move on from each other. That’s not
what happened at all, and seeing you pregnant with his child, infuriated me.
You are all wrong for him. He is a good, strong man, and you are nothing but an
unstable, psychoneurotic, selfish bitch. You and your family caused every
heartbreak that Cade has ever had to endure.”

“So
you want to create another one for him? What kind of love is that, Willow? Cade
loves his son more than he loves anything in this world, even me. Taking his
boy away from him would break him to the point of no return. What the hell is
wrong with you? What does this gain you? You will never get him back like this.”

“I
am not doing this to get him back, nor is this even about your inability to be
a good mother. I took Cayden to protect him, Ellia.  Camerson’s enemies know
where you are, and they wouldn’t hesitate to kill your son.  Our operatives on
the inside informed us of such though I am sure Cade didn’t tell you. He
understands how mentally feeble you are. So, I am stepping in to assure that
Cayden remains unharmed until after the trial. He will be safe with me until
this gets resolved, or you are dead, or maybe both. Your bad blood can only
taint his life and endanger him,” she said in an icy tone. “Stop being so egocentric
and understand what I am doing is the right thing for your child. He is a piece
of Cade, and I plan to do everything in my power to keep your filth from
ruining his life.”

“I
am his mother, and he needs to be with me. I would die protecting our son. You can’t
use this case to justify stealing our baby. Give him back! He is not yours!” I
screamed the words into the receiver. Cade burst through the door. “It’s Willow,”
I said through my tears. “She has Cayden.” He snatched the phone from me with
such force, I stumbled backward as his hand shot out to steady me.

“Where
the fuck is my son, Willow?” I was only privy to his side of the conversation.
“What the hell are you saying? Bullshit. She is not unstable. That doesn’t give
you the right to take our child. That’s my job, not yours.” Cade walked out of
the room, and I followed him. He motioned to his coworkers what was going on,
and they plugged something into my phone so we could all hear what she was
saying.

 “Where
are you Willow? Let me come and get Cayden.”

“No,
he is fine here with me. I love you Cade, and I’m doing this for you because
you mean everything to me.”