Evie's Knight (27 page)

Dad warned that the glass was delicate, that she’d have to be extra careful with such a fragile piece. And because she cherished it, regarded it as if her mother had left it behind on purpose, just for her, Evie was vigilant, mindful to handle it with care.

Yet one summer night after dinner, when Evie was eleven years old, a neighborhood friend came tapping on the screen door; she was missing out on a game of Ghost in the Graveyard out front. Dad wouldn’t let her go until she cleared the table, and sunlight was fading fast. So Evie sped through it, took loads of dishes to the sink at once.

Grandma and Grandpa Wylder had joined them that night, so there were more dishes than usual. And though she thought better of it, Evie stacked her crystal drinking glass atop a set of dirty plates. She’d walked slowly, carefully eyeing the treasure with each step, willing the piece to stand sturdy and weather the storm.

If the glass fell, it would most likely take some doing, and it probably wouldn’t be quite the same, but Dad would be able to piece it back together. Evie told herself that very thing as she detected the first hint of a wobble. But when it tipped off its base, tumbled over the plates and onto the hard, tile floor, the damage was devastating.

The sheer sound of shattering glass left her stunned. But the sight of it, the thousands of tiny slivers glistening in the amber glow of the setting sun took her breath away. She frantically eyed the floor, looking for remnants, parts she could piece together, but there were none. Only tiny shards that would cut at the touch.

The worst part, the thought that caused an unbearable ache in the center of her chest even still, was that she had caused it. She’d been careless, and paid the price.

But what had she done wrong here? What had she done to cause Calvin Knight–loving, steadfast and true–to walk out of her life? Leave her in a shattered ruin, left to pick up the pieces.

Focusing on the blur of her open doorway, Evie recalled the moment Calvin left, hating the way she’d broken down and begged him to stay. What a tormenting thought, a dark and terrible acknowledgment: Calvin Knight had stopped loving her.

***

“Evie.” Her dad’s voice was firm. “You really shouldn’t miss another day of school. You’re not making things any better for yourself.”

School? The week wasn’t over yet? “What day is it?” The pillow puffed around her face muffled her words.

“It’s Wednesday. And when was the last time you ate?”

She pictured the jar of green olives she’d smuggled into her room. The half-eaten bag of Doritos at the foot of her bed. “Um, I had some–”

“You need to eat.”

The mere mention of food made her groan.

“And take a damn shower already,” he said.

She looked horrible; she knew that. But it wasn’t the reason she hid herself from him. To look at her father’s face–to have him look at hers–would be too painful. Humiliating, even. She couldn’t let him see just how damaged she really was. 

“Eve–”

“I’ll take a shower,” she said. “I promise. And I’ll do my online courses tomorrow, I swear. I just need one more day.”

After a long silence, he answered her plea with his retreating footsteps and headed out the door.

Relief washed over her just long enough for the pain to come back in a crashing wave. She curled her knees to her chest, immersed herself in the depths of it, and let the relentless tide drag her beneath the surface. She imagined sitting next to Calvin in the Jeep, pictured his handsome face, the way he smiled when he teased her.

Stifled sobs shook her body as she fought back the tears. She’d probably never see Calvin again, but even if she did, she’d seen him smile that way for the very last time. That smile would belong to someone else now–the mere thought crushed her chest with a crippling ache.

Similar thoughts burdened her as the day passed on. Still she lay in place, cursing the ruined state of her life. As the hours slipped away, yellow bands of afternoon sunlight slipped through the blinds and graced the far corner of her room, announcing Dad would be home soon. Following the strips of light with her eyes, she gazed over the oil painting Calvin had given her for her birthday. The young couple caught up in the storm.

Evie tried to imagine the painting without the man. A lone girl beneath the cloth, searching for solace. She eyed the blanket draped around her own shoulders, looked over the sorry state of her room, and considered the messy state of her life. She didn’t like it. Because she wasn’t some lost and helpless little girl. Sure, she didn’t have Calvin in her life anymore, but that didn’t mean she had to stop living.

She’d suffered long enough.

Now it was time to move on.

With a fresh sense of empowerment, Evie threw back the covers and came to a stand. Stubborn resolve fueled her forward as she marched out of the room, determined to put it all behind her. She’d hide every reminder of him. The sketches he’d drawn for her, the gifts he had given her. All of it had to go.

But first, she needed a shower. 

She flipped on the bathroom light, cringing from the abrasive strength of it, and felt her chin drop when she saw her reflection: smaller-looking eyes, a red, swollen nose, and a mess of blonde, rain-matted hair. The sight made her feel even worse. She took brief pleasure in freeing the hair band from the knotted pile; she’d probably set some sort of record for having kept it in for so long.

When the water kicked on, Evie turned up the heat and breathed in the lovely steam, using it to heal and revive, reminding herself that she was worthy of the indulgence. Familiar scents of her berry shampoo and vanilla body soap almost made her forget, but she was quick to remind herself when that happened. Ever mindful of the fact that he was gone. Still, just like the other hardships in her life, she would get past this. She would move on.

Chapter Thirty-one

“You sure you don’t want to try some?” Parked in the alley behind The Castle, Kelly held a paper cup in one hand, a bottle of Vodka in the other.

Evie eyed the orange mixture in Kelly’s cup, and then looked into her smoky blue eyes. “Yeah. I’m sure.” She screwed the small, plastic cap on the orange juice and shoved the carton back in the grocery sack.

“Come on. You’re entitled. You were dumped.”

Evie shrugged off the comment. “Yeah, a month ago. I’m over it.” Though that wasn’t true. She might not speak of Calvin anymore, to anyone, but she missed him more than ever. She’d even taken to rummaging through the obituaries again. This time scanning for an entirely different face. “Why do you think I said
yes
to Tyler?” she asked, hoping the fact might prove her point.

Kelly tipped her drink back and paused to shudder. “Why
did
you say yes to Tyler? I thought you hated him.”

She did hate him. But Tyler could make her feel wanted again. At least for tonight. She shrugged. “I don’t know. Because he called, I guess. It’s not even a date, really. I’m just meeting him here. No biggie.”

Bright lights flashed through the back window as a car pulled up behind Kelly’s VW.

“I wonder if that’s him,” Kelly said.

Evie squinted as she looked back. “I wonder if it’s a cop.”

“No doubt. Crap! Where’s the lid to this stuff?” Kelly patted frantically around her seat.

“It’s down there.” Evie pointed at Kelly’s feet. “By the brake.” She reached over the stick shift, barely securing the metal lid in her grasp, and felt the base of the bottle knock into her back as she moved to sit upright once more. A splash of cool liquid spilled over her shoulder. 

“Oh my gosh. Sorry, sorry, sorry.” Kelly eyed the wet spot on Evie’s shirt.

Evie looked down, nearly gagging from the smell as it seeped through to her skin. “Good thing I wore black.” She pinched the fabric, pulled it away from her to fan out the strong odor. “Can’t believe you can actually drink something that smells like this.” She handed the cap to Kelly, eyeing the harmless-looking group piling out of the car behind them.

Kelly screwed the cap back on and took the final swig from her cup. “Let’s get this stuff in the trunk.”

The loud, blasting music set the tone as Evie followed Kelly onto the dance floor, scanning the club for Tyler. The pulsing vibration of the music traveled through the soles of her tall, black boots, made her want to dance.

While moving to the music, the beat changing from one song to the next, Evie continued to check the time on her phone, wondering why Tyler was taking so long to get there. She was patient for the first hour, but as the second hour passed by, song after Tyler-less song, the familiar flare of rejection kindled hot and potent within her. Was he actually going to stand her up? He was the one who’d texted her, initiated the whole thing.

Who cared? She’d just find somebody else. She wasn’t about to wait for him all night. In fact, Tyler was an idiot; she didn’t want to be with him anyway. What had she been thinking?

Lights beamed through the heavy scented fog as Evie scanned the club for someone else to misbehave with. Before long her eyes landed on a potential candidate. He was handsome, built, charmingly unaware, and seemed to have his eyes set on her. Perfect.

Men were such simple creatures, she mused as she flashed him a deliberate smile. She playfully exchanged teasing glances with the attractive stranger as he made his way to her through the crowd. Yet just before the dark-haired distraction was within her grasp, a brassy brunette with mile-high legs danced up alongside him, enticed him to stay. After a thorough look up and down the girl’s slender body, Evie’s prospect did just that.

Disappointment rushed in, coupled with yet another dose of rejection. A sudden desperation hit once she noticed Kelly was dancing with a guy of her own. As she searched the club again, hating Tyler more than ever for standing her up, a deep sense of loneliness–thicker than the dance fog–seeped through her head like a dark, heavy cloud.
I’ll never be loved again. I’m not worthy of love. I never have been.
That fear sunk deeper, deeper still until she sunk with it, into a low and empty place in her mind. She stood motionless on the busy dance floor, watching the nameless faces in the crowd, wishing she was home instead.

Just then a strong body slid up against her from behind, encouraged her to move with the rhythm. She welcomed the gesture, moved her hips with his before turning to face her new mystery guest. The quick glance over her shoulder revealed a familiar face: smooth olive skin and blond tousled hair. Parker.

A tight breath pulled at her throat. Was Calvin in the club too? The mere thought was an explosion in her chest, an unsettling sort of fluid that made every one of her muscles clench in defense. She turned away, and with her back against him, tried to assess the situation. It wasn’t easy to do, and Parker made it even harder by leaning in from behind.

The scruff from his late-night shadow grazed her shoulder. “Calvin’s not here. You don’t have to worry.” His lips teased at her ear, trailed along her neck.

The action shocked and enticed her all at once. Confusion was there too, amidst the myriad of emotions that swam through her mind.

Did it matter? Whatever it was,
who
ever it was, this was a welcome distraction from the pain. Precisely what she’d been looking for.

He pressed his body against hers and slid his hands around her hips, resting them at her waist. They felt nice there. Solid. Warm. Like Calvin’s. She took in a deep, jagged breath as her heart raced, letting her eyes close while his hands moved longingly up her frame.

Then, grabbing hold of her tightly, Parker turned her to face him.

His face–it’d been a month since she’d seen Calvin, and Parker now resembled his younger brother more than ever before. The deep brown eyes, the golden glow of his skin, and sculpted appeal of his jaw. And his mouth. Those full, perfectly formed lips.

Her heart thumped as they stood, embraced. His hands, wrapped around her hips. Hers, gripping his forearms.

Delay mingled with desire.

There was an undeniable chemistry surging, the deep enmity and anger she torched for him secretly teasing her senses.

He came closer, licking his lips.

She moistened hers as well.

Just before their mouths met, Parker stopped. He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. Their lips, just a breath apart. She didn’t know what kept him; doubt, or the sheer urge to build up the moment. But desire shot through her, strong and intense. A fierce craving to have those lips on hers–a hunger for the man she longed for still. And when the thought came to her that they were not Calvin’s lips, the need to get even took precedence, fueled her to inch forward. She closed the gap between them, softly, just letting their lips touch, knowing the moment they did an explosion would erupt; the uncertainty lay only in the moment before the kiss.

She was right.

Parker came back with a brutal force that had her gasping for breath. He locked her tightly against him while his hands ran up her back. The kiss became madness as he dominated with new and forceful lips that fed and took with no regard. His hands moved freely, sliding over her body, pulling her closer while gripping her curves.

The boldness of his action awoke something in her, brought a sudden awareness that kicked in strong and hard. Senses screaming, an unwelcome awakening put an end to the passion. She brought her hands to Parker’s chest and pressed herself away from him, breaking the kiss along with their embrace.

Their eyes met, and she wanted to vanish–be somewhere else, someone else, anything. She only knew that she did not want to be that person…the one who just did what she’d done.

Parker looked at her, out of breath, eyes still fierce with desire.

“Ugh.” She sighed painfully, put her face in her hands. “I’m sorry. I’m just…” She shook her head, pulled her hands free and looked into his eyes. He looked so much like Calvin then. And for a moment, Evie almost felt as if she was explaining to the both of them. “I’m so broken right now, and this…” she gestured to him with a limp hand, “won’t fix it.” Tears welled up, a painful acknowledgement of the truth in her words. She
was
broken, and she was only making things worse.