Embracing Everly (23 page)

This I all knew. “Yeah, good.” I knew he’d finish Charlie for her and me. I would love the pleasure of kicking his ass, but I also knew it would do me no good to be put away.

“Mick,” she yelled for me from the bathroom. I looked at the clock on the microwave seeing my time was up.

I stood next to him. “I want to be alone with her tonight. You can take my place.” I pulled the set of keys from my pocket and dropped them onto the table. I didn’t wait for an answer, but I heard the sweep of my keys and the front door a second later. I smiled knowing I’d have the night alone with Everly. And I was going to win her heart back if it was the last thing I did.

HE WALKED IN,
scooped up my wet body and gently placed my naked figure on my bed. A moment later he kicked off his boots, stripped down to his boxer briefs and climbed in next to me like nothing was wrong. My heart was in my throat like all the words were there but not able to come out. I was so nervous knowing I needed to tell him. Wondering if he’d hate me or stay by my side. To be lying next to him like time hadn’t passed. I shivered at his touch.

His pulled the blanket over my bare chest, and then his hand played with my hair before he brushed it back. “You cold?”

“No, but Mick…”

“Shh,” he held his fingers to my lips hushing me. “Just let me hold you until we both fall asleep.” He snuggled up next to me and held on tight, just the way he knew I liked. “I’m so damn tired, Angel, I could sleep for a month in your arms.”

I lay there for a second, deciding what was for the best. Let him sleep or find a way to tell him. The secret was eating away at me¸ and I knew I had to do it now. What did he always say? Rip it off like a Band-Aid. “Mick,” I whispered “Would you forgive me if I did something without meaning to?”

His arms slightly come undone around me. “What baby? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”
Everything,
I murmured quietly. “Could you grab that pencil and paper and help me write down these words in my head?”

He sat all the way up and huffed, scrubbing the five o’ clock shadow on his chin. “You want to write, right now?”

I nodded.

He sighed again but scooted off and grabbed my stuff. He sat back down and instead of resting his head on the pillow he used the backboard as his headrest. “All right, shoot.”

“It’s a really rough, rough draft, but if you could write the words down for me…” I refrained from avoiding it any longer; instead I started letting the words spill slowly as he wrote each one down on paper.

“There was a time, I suppose

When I thought love was out of reach

But circumstances pried and brought you to me

And now I’m back to one, instead of three.”

“Skip a line there,” I told him.

“Frankly, I can’t tell

If it’s for the best

Or if it will destroy me

I might never know.”

I pointed again to skip a line.

His eyes peered up, confused. “This is kind of sad. Are these lyrics?”

I didn’t answer him. I just kept going concentrating on the words.

“When it’s just me

I can’t see through the haze

My heart aches for you

My heart aches for you

And I never even got to hold you

Before you were sent to heaven.”

Mick’s sad eyes looked up and stared into mine as the pencil fell to the side. “What is this, Ev?”

I tilted my head, my good hand cupping his chin. “I didn’t know, I swear. The doctor told me when I woke up.”

“He told you what? I need you to spell this out for me.” The pain in his eyes and voice were too much to bear, and I couldn’t stop myself from breaking down. The tears fell; my throat clogged with the sobbing.

“Everly, he told you what?” He gripped my chin, lifting my face to gaze into my already tear-filled eyes.

“I was bleeding. They thought it was from the fall, but it wasn’t. I mean it was, but… there was a baby, Mick, and I didn’t even know about it. I was just a few weeks they said.”

“Oh, my God,” he pulled me into his chest, his grip so tight it hurt me, and I couldn’t breathe but I didn’t care. I had needed him to hold me, to tell me it would be okay. Over and over he whispered, “I’m so sorry.” Each time it broke my heart a little more knowing he blamed himself.

After ten solid minutes of both of us sobbing, gripping each other like we had to hold on to save one another, he moved me away gently. “I have to go.”

He stood, sliding into his jeans. “Mick, please don’t leave me right now. I need you, and I know you need me,” I pleaded, not knowing what the hell was going through his mind.

His hand caressed my cheek; his thumb was resting on my mouth. “Everly, just remember I love you. Can you do that?”

I nodded. “Yes, but…”

He tugged his shirt on, leaving it unbuttoned. “But, nothing. I’ve got to do this.” He turned, grabbing his boots and tore out of my room so fast there was no way I could keep up with my injuries.

I pounded on my bedroom wall hoping to stir Dawson awake. I had no clue if he was over there or not, but I needed someone to run after Mick.

Dawson bolted into my room within minutes, screaming my name. He stopped short seeing me sitting on the bed doing my best to get dressed. “What’s wrong?” His eyes glanced across the expanse of the room. “Where’s Mick?”

“I told him, Dawson. I told him about the baby. He took off, and I’m afraid he’s going to do something bad.”

“Shit! I’ll find him.”

I flopped back, tears still flooding my eyes, praying Dawson reached him before he did anything stupid.

MY LIFE MEANT
shit to me right now. The hurt in her eyes when she broke down nearly killed me. And then to find out that fucker killed our baby had me cracking like never before.
A baby?
It was the last thing I expected to hear from her when she had me write those lyrics down. A baby I never in a million years wanted, but now missed knowing there was a potential. I felt so confused, tangled like I was spinning in circles in a spider web I couldn’t break free from. I left her there crying, unable to comfort her when I had so much rage boiling inside of me. I knew I should be back in her room, talking this through, holding her and her holding me, but I couldn’t.

Dawson and Everly had both been calling for the last twenty minutes as I sat outside his frat house like they were hitting send every second to reach me. I threw my phone onto the passenger seat trying to ignore them.

My gun was resting on my thighs as I grabbed my phone one last time wanting to hear her voice. I knew I shouldn’t call her since she’d try and talk me out of this, but I just couldn’t stop myself in case something bad went down. “Mick?” she answered, hope rang out as she practically shouted my name.

“Hey, Angel, I just wanted to hear you one more time tonight.”

“Mick, whatever it is you’re planning on doing—don’t. If you really love me, you won’t go through with it. I know it’s selfish of me to use that line, but I need you, Mick. Me, not him. He’ll get what’s coming to him, I promise. Please come back to me?” she pleaded with tears.

“I can’t, baby.”

“Mick, where are you?”

“He needs to pay. I’m sick of this shit. I’ve lived with death my whole fucking life babe, and now you, us, that baby we will never get to fucking meet because of him.” I could feel myself coming unglued as I sat there and festered longer about it.

“Mick, we have time to make more memories, more babies but we can’t if you’re dead or behind bars for the rest of your life.”

More babies? Jesus
.

“Do me a favor?”

“What? Anything,” she answered, and I could hear her trying to hide the tears I knew she was shedding.

“Go be famous for me, will you? Love you, Angel.” I swiped my phone and tossed it on the floor, unable to deal with any more emotions. Emotions got you hurt. Mix love into the center of it and it sucks you into some twisted vortex of hell, royally fucking you.

I checked to make sure my gun was loaded, took a deep breath and began the walk to the rear of the house. I’d taken lives before, not many, but some. All bad men who would’ve met their maker eventually, but one time an innocent man for the sake of the cause, back when I was brainwashed with my father’s beliefs, and each time I hated it. This time I was going to enjoy hearing Charlie squeal like the pig he was.

“Mick,” Dawson flung me into a tree. Damn it all, I was losing it. I didn’t even hear his footsteps, that was how clouded my head was. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Jesus, Dawson, you are one lucky son of a bitch I didn’t shoot you.” I panted, his hands releasing me. “How the hell did you find me?”

“Called Fuzz. He located your phone. Besides it didn’t really take much to figure it out.”

I looked at him incredulously.

“What?” he shrugged. “We have everyone on tap at the club.”

“Go back and keep an eye on Everly. I need to do this, Dawson.”

“No. Hand me the pistol?” He held his hand out waiting for me to give in.

“No.” I shook my head unable to believe he expected me to not seek revenge.

“Irish, I could take you out in five-seconds flat and you wouldn’t even know what the fuck hit you. We will take care of that asshole as soon as possible, and we will make sure he pays and suffers for what he did to that girl and your baby.”

I began to shake him off. “You knew?”

“Mick, you left her there in tears. She’s fucking lonely and needs you more than ever. Stop being a selfish fuck and go take care of her—that’s where the hell you need to be right now.”

“I don’t know if I can. I need vengeance. I want to cause him so much pain.” I felt like the world was crumbling all around me. Rarely did anything go smoothly for me in my life. The one thing I believed I finally got right was sitting in bed crying while I was out seeking justice. Maybe I was like my father after all was said and done. Maybe I wasn’t weak for walking away from them and the cause like he accused me of. Maybe I found my cause. It was different from theirs, but it was my cause. A cause I believed in.

Exasperated, I turned to Dawson to say anything, but I remained silent. He didn’t need my whining about my past and how my crappy karma was coming back to bite me in the ass.

“He’ll get his when the time is right. Go home, Mick.”

Longingly, I stared at the window Everly had jumped out of, wishing I could finish him, but he was right.
Home?
It was a nice word. A word that I never thought I’d have a chance at again. She needed me more than I needed to do this. At least for the time being.

“Yeah, I’m coming.”

SOMETHING WAS OFF,
and it had been painfully obvious to me now that my coherency had kicked back in. Mick and Dawson spoke as if they had known each other longer than a few weeks. They were way too comfortable in the middle of a heated discussion like they had done it a thousand times. Mick had barely left my room since Dawson fetched him and brought him back home. I knew by the look on Mick’s face and the tone in his voice he wished for immediate vengeance at my badly timed news about losing our baby. A baby I never even knew existed until I woke up, drugged and unable to really process the loss.