Desiring the Highlander (32 page)

Ellenor did as instructed, glad for the nonemotional, honest answer. Somehow, it calmed her more than a simple “no” or “of course not” ever could have.

Brighid’s brows furrowed as she watched Laurel slip the deep crimson vision over Ellenor’s head. “Shouldn’t she wait to dress until Cole arrives?”

Ellenor shook her head and slithered into the garment. “No, Laurel is right. Sunset is almost here and I think it is time to finish dressing and head down towards the chapel. I want to be there waiting when Cole arrives.”

Ellenor removed her gaze from the dark night sky and refocused it on the few remaining friends still in the chapel. “I’m fine, Brighid, really. Please convince your husband that you and he should go. I would feel much better knowing that Cole and I haven’t robbed you of your own reunion.”

“But…what are you going to do?”

“I’m staying,” Ellenor answered calmly.

“Here? In the chapel? You can’t!”

“I’ll
stay with her,” Maegan growled.

Ellenor took a deep breath and exhaled. It had been almost six hours since the last bits of sun disappeared behind the horizon. After which, it had taken three hours to convince everyone in the chapel to return to their homes. Finn had forced his exhausted wife, Aileen, to retire, and finally Conor made Laurel go to bed under the guise that someone should be awake in the morning. Brighid and Maegan, however, had doggedly refused to leave. And because Brighid would not leave, neither would Donald.

“And if you would, please take Maegan home. I doubt her grandmother realized it would be so late when she agreed to let her stay.” Ellenor reached out and clutched her little friend’s hand. “I need you to go, please.”

“I’m not going!” Maegan shouted.

“Yes, you are,” Ellenor returned quietly. “Father Lanaghly will be with me. I won’t be alone.”

“How can you even
want
to stay and wait for a man who didn’t even show up to his own wedding?”

Ellenor tapped the padded bench beside her and waited for Maegan to sit down. Gathering the small thin fingers in her hands, Ellenor tried to think of an explanation the young girl might understand. “When Clyde left, you knew he might be gone for a long time. Years. Much could happen in that time. Things you cannot control. What if it causes him to be away even longer than you thought? Are you still going to wait?”

Maegan stared at her fingers. A teardrop fell. “I would wait forever.”

“Then you understand why I have to stay.”

Maegan turned and embraced Ellenor. Letting go, she sniffled, wiped her eyes with her sleeve, and shook her head as if the small gesture erased her lapse into tears. Then she mumbled something about the ingratitude of men and marched out the chapel doors.

Brighid quickly hugged her friend and whispered, “I’ll leave and take care of Maegan, but the moment Cole arrives, I want to know.” Standing up, she issued Donald a cutting stare as if he had any control over the situation.

Donald glanced at Ellenor, giving her one last look of apology, saying once again with his eyes that he had no idea where Cole was. He should have arrived hours ago.

Ellenor watched the couple leave. As soon as the doors closed, she pivoted in the pew and stared at the altar. Father Lanaghly moved to sit beside her. She gave a sideways smile at the older priest. His deep brown eyes, usually merry, were full of concern, and Ellenor reached over and tapped him reassuringly on his knee. He stroked his white beard as if contemplating a difficult speech. Ellenor knew what he was going to say. A second later, the kind man confirmed it. “You, too, should retire, milady. A chill is rising in the night air and the fires are turning to embers. Soon it will be cold.”

Ellenor shook her head and remained seated. “No, Father, I am going to remain here. When Cole arrives, I will be waiting for him, ready. For I will be Cole’s wife before sunrise. He promised.”

Father Lanaghly inhaled deeply and sighed. He stood up and shrugged his shoulders. The possible reasons for Cole’s delayed appearance were limitless and varied, but the majority of them said if Cole were going to arrive, he would have by now. Still, if his future bride needed to believe Cole would come, Father Lanaghly would not tell her otherwise.

Turning around, he grabbed a stick and thrust it into the embers. After a minute, it began to burn and he moved to relight some of the candles. He then tossed several more logs into the hearth, and after a few crackle-filled minutes, the blaze grew and the small chapel began to warm once again.

Once done, he went to stand beside Ellenor, who had moved to look out one of the large arched windows overlooking the dark ravine below. In the distance, the sinking moon highlighted majestic mountains that jutted out into the sea. Ellenor pointed to them. “See those? Every night I look at them and wonder if those are the mountains of my new home. I hope so. They are truly magnificent, don’t you think? So beautiful.”

Father Lanaghly nodded thoughtfully. “I cannot fathom your reaction, milady. I was watching you this evening to see if you were suppressing any anger while amidst your friends, but that is not the case. You are calm when most women I have met would be more than a little angry by now. But not you and I cannot help but wonder why? You have every right to be mad and no one would blame you. And yet, you are not.”

Ellenor stretched her shoulders and looked up. The chapel was a simple one with few decorations. The one exception was the large round, arched ceiling. A traveling artist had created the masterpiece, and though it had been many years, the bright colors and vibrancy of the heavenly mural was still very beautiful.

Walking over to the hearth, she stood in front of the fire with her backside to the flames and thought how to answer. “When Cole came to get me from my sister’s home, I had no choice but to go. Cole had made a promise to Laurel to bring me back, and my feelings about the matter were of little consequence—especially when we first embarked. I felt like I had no control over anything, and it…it scared me. What took me a while to realize was that I
did
have control, not over all things, but I was not powerless over myself. I had a choice about how I behaved, and for at least the beginning of the trip, I chose poorly.”

Father Lanaghly nodded silently in understanding.

Ellenor moved her gaze once again to the dark horizon and spoke softly, almost as if it were more to herself. “Cole and I have strong personalities, and if we are to work, we must be friends. The best kind of friends. We need to know that when things happen, there is at least one person whom we can count on—each other. It’s the greatest gift we can give to each other. So,” she said with a half smile, looking back at the dark brown eyes studying her, “when Cole arrives, he will know that I have faith in him—in us.”

Father Lanaghly stared quietly at the young Englishwoman. When news had traveled that Cole was to wed, he had ended his visit with a friend and immediately journeyed to McTiernay castle. He had married Cole’s parents as well as their first two sons, and he had been surprisingly eager to marry their third.

He had been curious to meet the young woman, wondering what prompted such a radical change of heart in the most unemotional of the McTiernay brothers. Upon meeting Ellenor, he had thought well of Cole’s choice. She had been kind, helpful, and very pretty. He had assumed she brought out the need to protect in Cole, and she, being a foreigner, had wanted his protection. But it wasn’t until just now did he ever consider that only something much more meaningful could have convinced Cole to marry. This woman understood him. “I wonder if Cole knows just how lucky he is to have found you?”

A light, sincere laughter filled the chapel. “Of course he does, Father. What else could have made him overlook my one serious fault of being English?”

Cole gripped his reins, waiting for the portcullis to slowly rise. Flames from lit scones flickered against the stone walls, leading the way through the gatehouse and into the dark inner yard. Just beyond the iron bars, he hoped Ellenor was still waiting for him. There was a chance—a good one—she wasn’t and he couldn’t blame her. Laurel and Brighid probably had her sequestered, protecting her from more disappointment. And yet, Cole could not see his Ellenor crying in some corner, wallowing in self-pity. More likely, she was spitting mad, pacing the floorboards ready to launch at him the minute their eyes locked. That he could handle. At least he hoped he could.

For weeks, he had been waiting to be reunited with Ellenor. He had dreamed of it every night, and when he was awake, she constantly invaded his thoughts. Countless times, he had almost sent for her, but until he could provide her a home and protection, he had forced himself to wait.

Three weeks ago, he had made his displeasure about the forward pace of reconstruction—or lack of it—abundantly clear. Dugan responded by working alongside Leith to rebuild Fàire Creachann, and finally, a few basic rooms had been made livable and shelters had been erected. It was not much, but now most of the clansmen working on the keep had a place to sleep that protected them from storms and foul weather. Most of all, it was enough for Cole to get Ellenor and bring her home.

Cole had not been alone in his anticipation. Donald, plus the handful of his married soldiers who had left wives behind, were also eager to travel south and return with their families. So a message had been sent. They would arrive on Saturday and there would be a wedding.

Saturday had ended three hours ago.

Riding hard, stopping only to sleep, the journey from Fàire Creachann to McTiernay Castle took forty-eight hours. Thursday morning the group had just begun the trip south when a messenger had caught up with them. There was a problem, requiring his immediate return. Unwilling to delay anyone else from greeting their loved ones, Cole ordered the group to continue, telling Donald that he would join them as soon as possible, but that he would be there. Unfortunately, the problem was neither small nor quick.

Fàire Creachann was heavily fortified, not by man, but by nature. Situated on top of a sizable headland that jutted 300 feet above the sea, the castle could be accessed by only one of two ways. Clansmen could ride on top of the strip of land that connected the promontory to the rest of Scotland, or they could travel via a tunnel inside the strip. Cole had ordered the tunnel to be sealed until its safety could be verified. Several young boys desiring a retreat away from adults and supervision hadn’t listened. A cave-in had occurred.

Wagons carrying heavy beams were crossing when part of the ground gave. Screams were heard for several minutes, then nothing. Left in charge, Dugan had immediately issued orders to get the wagon out of the way and start digging. He also sent for Cole. The situation called not just for the laird to reassure his people, but a critical thinker who could develop a plan quickly and decisively.

Cole had returned, assessed the situation, and began barking orders. Clansmen and soldiers worked tirelessly for hours and into the night, but finally, late the next morning, more than twenty-four hours after the collapse, the boys were rescued. Bumps and several bloody scrapes covered them, but they were alive.

And Cole was very late.

The whole ride toward McTiernay Castle, Cole reviewed his decisions in his head, and for each one, he would do the same thing again. He loved Ellenor and she loved him, but could she be happy as a laird’s wife? Especially if it were a struggling clan whose demands upon their leader were constant and numerous?

Cole had tried telling himself that his delay was auspicious, that it gave them both a chance to realize if such events could be weathered or if they would be a source of constant battles and tension. But he also dreaded learning the truth, because he knew, deep down, that if he ever lost Ellenor, he would be losing a piece of himself.

Finally, the iron barrier was high enough to allow entry. Cole kicked his mount in the hind legs and directed the animal toward the stables. He slid off the back, threw the reins at a semiconscious stable boy, and dashed across the yard toward the North Tower and his old room. He bounded up the stairs and hesitated only a moment before pushing open the door. It was dark with only faint starlight coming through the window to guide his movements. The embers from the fire had died, and with the exception of a soft fragrance in the air, the room felt cold and empty. He reached the bed. It had been turned down and something was scattered all over it. Petals from flowers. There was no sign of Ellenor.

Cole scooped some petals in his hands. They were dry and crumbled easily. Sweeping them aside, he sank onto the edge of the bed and bent over, clutching his head in his hands. Memories of the last moments they had shared together flooded his mind, and suddenly, Cole knew that it was not as it seemed. Simple dismissal was not Ellenor’s style.

Cole rushed down the tower stairs and headed toward the Star Tower, hoping his brother would be able to tell him where Ellenor was waiting and just how mad she would be when he got there. He was nearly at the tower’s archway when he spied candlelight flickering to his right. Pivoting, he changed direction and hastened toward the chapel entrance, wondering if Ellenor was there. And if she was there, why had she refused to leave?

Ellenor was afraid to open her eyes. She didn’t want to learn that the tender kiss against her cheek or the strength in the fingers softly enfolding her hand were only parts of a fading dream. “Cole?” she whispered.

“Aye,” came the husky reply.

Her lids fluttered open. It was Cole. He was bending over her. He had finally arrived. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hung on as he lifted her onto his lap. He tilted her head back and she gazed into his eyes. Pain, worry, and fear lurked in the deep blue depths. She tucked back a stray lock of his dark hair. “I knew you would come,” she whispered. And then she leaned forward and kissed him in a way that left no doubt about her feelings. Her embrace was tender, but passionate, and Cole took full advantage of the offering.

They kissed away the weeks of loneliness, the hours of worry, the fear of unfulfilled promises. Ellenor once again found the man whom she could trust with her heart and soul and Cole clung to the softness and intimacy only she could give him. No longer did fear accompany the intensity or depth of their need for each other. Never again would they be alone.

Ellenor felt a shudder pass through Cole as he reluctantly eased himself away from her. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I know. I love you, too.”

“I have to explain, tell you why I was—”

“Shhh,” Ellenor said, stopping him with a finger softly pressed against his lips. “You need say nothing.”

Cole kissed the fingertip and then tugged it away from his lips. “I don’t know whether to be grateful or concerned,” he said warily.

Ellenor gazed into his eyes. His love for her was abundantly clear, but equally clear was the fear of which he had spoken. He couldn’t believe that she wasn’t angry, at least on some level, about his late arrival. Taking his hands in hers, she said, “I have faith in you and therefore in us. I know you would have been here if it were not for a very good reason. And if I needed proof”—she paused, fingering his filthy tunic—“all I would have to do is to inhale deeply. You…well, you stink.”

Cole laughed and hugged her tightly to him. “And you smell wonderful. How did I get so lucky?” And before she could respond, he closed his hand around the back of her head and brought her mouth down to his.

His kiss was surprisingly gentle as he urged her lips apart. She allowed him into her moist warmth, tasting him with her tongue, recalling what it was like to be with him. Suddenly, she needed to touch Cole everywhere—his throat, his chest, his abdomen—she needed to explore every inch of him. The full force of her hunger must have broken over Cole for she could feel the increased tempo of his pounding heartbeat, hot and heady and compelling. Her body stirred in response, remembering. He groaned and crushed her hips against him, letting her feel his desire, knowing it would build her own need for him to uncontrollable levels.

Ellenor was seconds away from ripping their clothes off when a simple, but penetrating cough followed by an “Ahem” filled the room. Embarrassed, she tried scuttling off Cole’s lap and down the pew, but he wouldn’t let her. The most Cole would allow was for her to turn around in his arms. “Hello, Father. I think we are finally ready. Care to do the honors?”

The old priest grinned and his brown eyes were dancing again. “Why, of course—”

He was interrupted by another, much louder, “Ahem”. Conan stepped around the priest and entered the room. Ellenor took advantage of Cole’s shock and jumped off his lap. “How did you know I returned…” Cole muttered in disbelief.

“Between the stable boy and the guard from the gate going around announcing your arrival, I believe most everyone knows and will soon be here wanting to witness the miracle of your wedding,” Conan teased. Then he looked at Ellenor. Her hair was askew and flowers were entangled in golden knots, but she still looked beautiful. “So, if you don’t mind waiting just a bit longer, Ellenor, there are a few more of us McTiernays that want to witness this event. We all still find it hard to believe Cole actually found someone who wants to be his wife.”

“Ha!” Cole exclaimed, pulling Ellenor protectively into his side. “The only thing more ill-fated is
you
getting married.”

Conan nodded and chuckled in agreement. “True, true, marriage is a blessed curse meant only for some and thankfully I am
not
one of them, but I am truly happy for you, brother. You have a most beautiful bride and with the exception of marrying you…a most intelligent one. Take care of her.”

Conan had barely spoken the words when Brighid came barreling in followed by Maegan and Laurel. Magically procuring Ellenor from his grasp, they gave Cole several dirty looks before declaring Ellenor needed to leave and would be back shortly. It was
his
turn to wait.

A half hour later, the resentment Cole had been feeling regarding Ellenor’s hastened absence and the discomfort of bathing in a tub in the kitchen instantly vanished. Most of the town had risen in the predawn hour to witness the nuptials, and their gasps as Ellenor reentered the chapel likened his own.

Ellenor looked exquisite. Her hair was down and the flowers had been removed. Only the simple tiara remained. The luckenbooth that had once belonged to his mother held the McTiernay plaid over one shoulder. Never had she looked more beautiful. She was a dream, an
aisling
, and she was about to be his.

Cole didn’t know when or why he had become so lucky; he just knew he was.

Ellenor laid her head against Cole’s shoulder as he carried her up the winding tower staircase. The simple reassuring movement of his muscles filled her with a sense of peace deeper than she had ever known. The night, which had started so uncertain, had ended with merriment and celebration. Instead of the morning light marking the end to the festivities, it only gave them new life. Those clansmen who had retired disappointed awoke to news of a wedding. They had quickly joined the feast, putting aside all but the most basic of chores and necessities.

The McTiernay clan didn’t show any signs of slowing or ending the party, so when Cole swung Ellenor into his arms and left to celebratory cheers, she was surprised, but thankful.

“I cannot think of when I have ever been so happy,” Ellenor sighed.

“I can think of only one time.”

Ellenor’s lashes flew up as she moved her head to look him directly in the eye. “And when was that?”

Cole paused and held her gaze. “When you first told me you loved me.”

Doubt flooded Ellenor’s expression. She had expected him to reference the last time they were together, not the final day of their journey from England. They had kissed and it had been magical. Then directly afterward, Cole had announced that the concept of they, as a couple, could never be. “Are we remembering the same moment? Because if I recall correctly, I wasn’t exactly in a good mood the first time I said I loved you. And you were anything but happy.”

Cole twitched his lips and resumed his march up the stairs. “Stunned more like it, but I
was
happy. To think that a woman like you could feel that way about someone like me…well, it still is a miracle. And for a brief moment, it gave me hope.”

“But then why were you so cold? So distant?”

“Hope that I might someday marry, but not you. You scared me. But it was too late, those words changed my future. At the time, I might not have realized or accepted it, but that’s understandable.” He paused at the door and nudged it open with his knee. Walking inside, he gently put her down on her feet and started to walk away.

Ellenor caught his arm and stopped him. “Understandable?”

“Aye,” Cole answered, brushing his knuckles down her cheek in a soft caress. “A man like me hopes to find someone who can tolerate him enough to start a family. And honestly, I had long ago resolved myself to bachelorhood. I thought I liked my freedom.”

“And didn’t you?”

“It wasn’t freedom I was clinging to, it was loneliness, and you, with those simple words, forced me to really look at what I was choosing.”

“Then why didn’t you say something sooner?”

“I thought you deserved better than me.”

Ellenor shook her head in incredulity. “Never. Never will I ever want any man other than you. I will always love you.”

Cole took a deep breath and exhaled. She still scared him. Losing her would cost him his soul, but he would not lose her from walking away. “And I love you, Scot,” he said with a smile. The love reflecting in the dark green depths of her eyes was bright and clear, and he knew it would never dim.

Ellenor grinned and playfully smacked his shoulder. “Scot! I’ll have you know that I am a legitimate Highlander now and will not tolerate such insults.”