Dare Me Forever (11 page)

And not a minute too
soon as there was only so much patience I could muster. I made myself
a huge bowl of popcorn, adding lots of salt and butter. I deserved it
after that phone call. I sat down on my comfy sofa, and turned the
DVR on to relax in the oddly comforting rhythm of watching strangers
buy their wedding dresses. Randy was, as usual, counseling a
despondent bride who cried about the loss of her mother, that she
couldn’t be with her for this special day. I got a little teary
eyed, but then I tried not to laugh as images of Miranda in Kleinfeld
Bridal flitted through my mind. As it switched to commercials, the
phone rang.

If it was my mother
again, I wouldn’t pick up, I thought as I fast-forwarded through
the commercial break. I looked at caller ID and saw unknown number.
I’d given out my cell number to a few clients before the store was
up and running, so I picked up.

“Amy.” Ryan’s low
voice washed over me. I felt myself smiling like an idiot—just from
a phone call! I could hardly imagine what I would be doing if he were
here.

“Hi.” My voice
sounded a bit wobbly, breathless.

He took a deep breath,
and in his perfect accent said, “I can’t get you off my mind.”

I didn’t know how to
respond. Obviously I felt the same way, but the butterflies in my
stomach were doing a crazy dance, and I wanted to sound coherent when
I responded. There was a silence, which stretched on for a little too
long.

“Ryan,” I finally
said, my voice raw and true, “I feel the same way.”

“Could I take you to
dinner?” he asked. Before I could answer, he said something else
that had my stomach doing somersaults and backflips.

“I want you.”

His voice was almost a
too low to hear. Shivers ran up and down my arms. Suddenly I no
longer wanted popcorn between my lips. I craved Ryan’s kiss, his
tongue exploring my mouth, his hands on my body.

We agreed to meet the
next night. I was just about to hang up, when I remembered I’d
already made plans with Hunter. I tried to stifle a groan. What I
really wanted to see Ryan right
then
, preferably naked.
“Wait,” I said quickly before he could end the call on his side,
“I actually just realized I have plans tomorrow—can we find
another time?”

“Oh, erm,” Ryan
began, unable to hide the disappointment in his voice, “of course.
How about Saturday?”

I agreed. It was just a
few more days. Like Ryan, I felt disappointed, deflated like a
balloon. But maybe the anticipation would make the date even better.
I didn’t remember ever feeling this turned on by anybody,
especially just from hearing that someone’s voice over the phone.
We said goodnight.

I walked into the
kitchen to drink a glass of cold water—I didn’t want to be so
visibly flustered—but then I remembered that I had the house to
myself. A mischievous smile crept across my face. I didn’t have to
keep my cool for anyone.

I practically ran into
my bedroom, opened the bed side drawer, and found my silver bullet.
As I tugged at the waistband of my pajama pants, I thought of Ryan’s
mouth on mine, imagined him trailing kisses down the body, grabbing
at my breasts with those incredible hands. I turned on the little
device. Licking, kissing, biting, until at last I pictured him
between my legs, his mouth teasing me.

I rubbed the vibrator
against my center. I imagined his tongue flicking my spot, his lips
sucking mine. I felt my breath sharpening, and couldn’t control my
moaning. I came with a great release and sat panting on the bed for a
few minutes. If just
thinking
about him could make me so
incredibly turned on, I was afraid and excited at what kind of
ecstasy would happen when we were in private again.

Amy

The restaurant Hunter
had picked was surprisingly crowded and really beautiful. It was
mostly couples or double dates, and the atmosphere was festive.
Hunter looked undeniably handsome in his jeans and chambray button
down shirt. He was one of those people who exude sexuality. It was
hard not to imagine what it would feel like to slowly unbutton his
shirt with my teeth, and then scolded myself for my dirty thoughts.
What was I, some horny teenager?
We are just friends,
I
reminded myself.
Friends catching up after a long time.
And I
was already developing real feelings for Ryan. I guess when you start
getting turned on so regularly, it’s hard not to think about sex
all the time.

The host tried to seat
us near the middle of the room, but Hunter stopped him and asked for
a table outside off to one corner. He didn’t seem relaxed like he
had when I’d last seen him. His jaw was set and rigid and he kept
unlocking his phone, glancing at it for a second, then putting it to
sleep. Was he expecting somebody to call? I hoped a glass of wine or
a beer would chill him out. Maybe this reunion wasn’t such a good
idea after all. I should have just pretended to be busy when we’d
run into each other yesterday.

“You okay?” I asked
tentatively. I didn’t want to go all emo on him, but he seemed
really stressed. At first Hunter remained silent, but as soon as they
were seated and the host had walked away, he took a deep breath.

“I’m fine,” he
said, although he still looked distracted through his smile and his
voice still sounded tight. He’d had moods likes this when we dated.
I tried to look at him now, and remember how he was the first guy I’d
ever loved, but even now the feeling of dread when he’d get all
silent on me was there, just as clear as if we’d dated yesterday.
Sure I’d had crushes before, but I hadn’t really given myself to
someone until I was with him. That’s why his moods affected me so
much. It seemed like if he was happy then I was happy, if he was
upset, I was too.

And of course it got
worse after I’d lost my virginity to him. I felt more attached than
before, more dependent on his satisfaction for my own happiness than
I ever had been. I took a sip of water and moved my thoughts
elsewhere. I had promised myself not to dwell on that now. Tonight
was for catching up with my old friend. But I could only do that if
he relaxed.

“So tell me what is
going on? What did you do after UT?” I asked. Hunter had gone away
to college in Texas, while I’d stayed local to take care of Luke
while I studied.

Hunter chuckled. “I
worked for a few contractors there, who were working on projects with
my dad in Austin and Dallas. It was good to learn the business away
from my dad’s shadow. And now of course, I’m back and helping him
run it.” Hunter smiled, his grin looking satisfied, confident. He
seemed to have loosened up a bit.

“We’re working on a
big project on the water front.” Hunter gestured towards the water.

“I know,” I said,
“Ryan told me.” I opened my mouth to speak again, but I noticed
Hunter’s face grow hard at the mention of Ryan’s name.

“Ryan,” he
repeated, his tone clipped. “How do you know him?” His voice
laced with anger like poison. I’d thought the animosity between
them was just something that happened that day at the party—a
spilled drink, a toe stepped on—not some long lasting feud. The way
he was asking, it felt like we were back in high school, and he was
furiously jealous of some other guy.

“I met him at your
party, remember?” I replied, “Not that it’s any of your
business.”

Before either of us
could say any more, the server returned, asking for our drink orders.
Hunter ordered a bottle of wine.
Good thing I didn’t say
anything about the fundraiser,
I thought. Not that I’d ever
tell him what actually happened there, under the table. Or after. But
who knew Hunter would make such a big deal of me even mentioning
Ryan’s name?

“Oh right, well let’s
not talk about work tonight. I’ve been meaning to tell you, you
look amazing. It’s been too long, Ames. You still are the Cherry on
Top.” I blushed. It was cheesy, but he always used to call to me
that when we were dating in high school. It was an inside joke—we
used to go to have ice cream sundaes at a diner near school, very
1950s, and he always asked for the unmanly maraschino cherry on his
ice cream. I teased him about it. Thus the nickname.

But I had to admit, for
all his moodiness, it was comfortable to be sitting across from him
again. Our shared history, the fact that he knew my family, had known
them even before everything went to shit. He’d even been like a big
brother to Luke for a while, playing football in the front yard and
teasing him about girls.

His phone rang. “Oh
Amy, I have to get this. I’ll be right back.” He walked to the
other corner of the patio. I know it shouldn’t bother me, but it
seemed sort of rude for him to answer the phone during dinner.
Couldn’t it wait?

When Hunter returned to
the table and went back to talking about living in Texas, and how he
was glad to be back in California, near the ocean, close to his
friends from growing up, I thought about what would have happened if
we’d stayed together. What if he hadn’t broken up with me that
night, six years ago? What would my life look like today? I really
couldn’t imagine it.

There was so much about
my life right now that had come from a lot of hard work and
sacrifice. With him maybe I wouldn’t have spent so much time
thinking about what I wanted to do with myself. Who knows?
Well it
doesn’t matter,
I reminded myself.
That’s not what
happened.
I pulled myself back to the present. Hunter hadn’t
even noticed that I wasn’t paying full attention to him, so I let
my mind wander once more. If we hadn’t broken up, I also wouldn’t
have had the opportunity to try things out with Ryan. I knew it was
still really early days, but the way I felt when I was with him had
to mean something.

After a delicious
dinner of spicy pasta arrabiata, roasted peppers, and a totally
overwhelming and decadent tiramisu, we were super full and ready to
go. As we walked back through the restaurant, Hunter put his hand on
my lower back, guiding me towards the front door. Just in front of us
stood a couple waiting to be seated. The man was handsome, looked
like a cool surfer turned entrepreneur, and his date had the most
gorgeous chestnut hair, framing her face in perfect loose curls.

“Craig, hey,”
Hunter said, dropping his hand from my back, but not before lingering
briefly on my backside. It was a light touch, probably accidental, I
told myself. He had a few quick words with Craig, something about a
recent poker game, while I stood off to the side. Craig glanced over
at me and smiled, but since Hunter apparently didn’t feel the need
to introduce me, I didn’t try to insert myself into the
conversation.

I felt kind of awkward
standing there not saying anything, but I guess it didn’t really
matter. I turned towards Craig’s date, determined to strike up a
conversation while the two men talked. But when I looked over at her,
she glared at me. There goes that plan. I couldn’t remember having
met her, or for that matter done anything to deserve such a look.

Hunter hurried us to
his car, a sleek Audi A-5 coupe, which he had parked down the block.
He seemed tense again, just like he had at the start of the evening.
I hoped it had nothing to do with work or what I’d said about Ryan.
As he started the car, Hunter cleared his throat, and I held my
breath, worried about what he was going to say. “Hey, Ames, uh—”
he cleared his throat again “—do you want to drive out to the
beach?”

That was
not
what I was expecting. I chewed on my lip. I didn’t feel that way
about him. He’d broken my heart years ago, and even though I was
over it, I knew I couldn’t go down that road again. No matter how
gorgeous Hunter was, with his dirty blond hair, and taut body. I
remembered how he liked me to dig my nails into his back when he
entered me, but I brushed the thought away before letting it go too
far. Thinking like that wouldn’t help me say no to the beach.
Besides, I didn’t know what was happening with Ryan, but I was
excited about what could be. And I had work to do anyway, wedding
invitations and a retirement party, due in the next couple of days.

“Um,” I began, my
voice a little higher pitched than normal, “thanks, but I should
really get home—I mean—I have to get up early for work tomorrow
and I have a ton of commissions.”

Hunter nodded his head
in agreement, but then was silent on the ride back, apparently deep
in thought. Or maybe he was disappointed.

“Uh, Hunter?” I
began, feeling goosebumps run down my body. “Do you have a heater?
I’m a little chilly.”

Silently, he adjusted
the temperature only on my side of the front seat. These new
expensive cars.

When we arrived in
front of my house, I quickly thanked him for dinner, and moved to get
out of the car. Hunter leaned over and grabbed my arm, pulling me
back into the plush seat.

“It’s really been
wonderful to see you, Ames,” he said softly. He scooted closer to
the console between us, and gave me a slow kiss on the lips. I
couldn’t help but kiss him back, slowly sucking on his bottom lip,
because it felt good and I was also curious what it would feel like
to kiss him again.

“Mmmm,” he growled,
and slowly began to slide his hand down my neck towards my breasts.

As much as I wanted us
to keep going, I knew my heart wasn’t really in it. I couldn’t
stop wishing he was Ryan. I gently put my hand on his arm and gave it
a light squeeze. His hand was still on my breasts, rubbing my
nipples, and he began snaking his hand down my torso, towards my
center. My body immediately responded, and I felt my panties getting
wet with want. I had to stop him before my judgment became too
impaired.

I gently pushed his
hand away. “Hunter, really it’s been great to see you. And I’m
happy to be friends again.”