Blue Moon (32 page)

             
“Of course I remember the things you said to me, it’s why I fell in love with you back then Den.”

I take my hands away from him and massage my forehead, not wanting him to see the pain showing in my eyes.

I will never forget the things he said to me, the way he was with me. Moreover, the way I slept alone crying of a broken heart, when I realised he would never want me how I wanted him.

             
“Do you remember that time you tried to kiss me?”

             
“No! Stop it Den! Don’t you fucking dare! I won’t have you do this to me! Why are you doing this?” I scream at him in frustration as I stand to my feet to face him.

             
“I didn’t kiss you back because you were 16 Zara, I was 19 years old. Every day of my life I have regretted that moment, every fucking day. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just wanted you to be ready, you were so young! I lost what I wanted in life after that fucked up night, so I took my heart to any girl that would have me, but none of them compared to you. I never looked at them for them, all I could see was you! I’m in love with you Zara; I have been since I knew was!”

The whole world stops around me, no movement
, no noise, no beat to my heart, just my whole world crashing on top of my empty shell. The room starts to spin as I fall back to earth with a bang, as does my heart as I feel the beat come back to it. Lifting my head to Den, I look at him through my tears with anger in my heart.

             
“How could you do this! How could you tell me this now!” I ask him through my gritted teeth.

             
“I wanted you to know, I don’t want you to be with Ruk, and not know that I am here. Here to love you more than he ever could, or has,” He tells me with a growl.

             
“Oh, and you think I will run into your arms. The man of my dreams who I have loved for so many years! You are doing this now because Ruk has taken an interest in me! Why could you not have told me before we came here? Or even a year ago! 2, 3, years ago?” I ask still in shock.

             
“I was scared that I’d lose you, scare you away. I didn’t know that you loved me. If I had of known, I would have been the happiest man alive, to be loved by someone as perfect as you. Please baby, do you love me, please say you’re still in love with me?”

             
“Stop!” Eric shouts as he walks into the room out of thin air and steps up to us.

This is when the
Brothers’ rush into the room growling at Eric, thinking that I am in danger.

             
“Get out!” Den growls at him angrily, as the Brothers’ crowd around me.

             
“He is a friend! Get off me!” I tell the Brothers’ harshly as I fight my way to stand before Eric, as they surround me in protection.

             
“He could be the one child, can you not see it?” He asks me, while watching me for my reaction, which he gets in the form of a laugh, but not a happy laugh, but one that hides every emotion boiling uncontrollably inside of me.

             
“Zara, what happened?” Dallah asks as she appears at my side and puts her arm around my waist.

             
“Oh, not much. Ruk is in love with me, as is Den, and Eric here was just telling me that Den could be my chosen!” I tell her sarcastically before my eyes land on Eric.

             
“Who are you Eric? Why are you always popping up and drooping these bombs on me?” I ask him with a raised voice.

             
“He is here because he is your meddling father, and because he wants you to be with Den,” My Mother tells me, suddenly appearing in the midst of this fiasco, now staring Eric down with pure hate.

             
“Antha, how are you, it’s been a long time,” Eric tells her with a gracious nod of his head and a smirk, angering my mother further.

             
“What the Fuck! You’re my father?” I ask in complete shock.

             
“You are my child,” He tells me with a proud smile.

             
“Our child!” my mother shouts at him.

             
“Calm yourself Antha. I am here to help our daughter see what is before her. Do you not want her to be happy?”

             
“HOW DARE YOU! She must follow her own destiny, not have it told to her with a version of your own!” She tells him with disgust before she steps up to me with a sorrowful smile, “My beautiful daughter, I’m so sorry that you have to take this all on. Den could be the one, as could Ruk, but there are also two others. Your father lied to you about Ruk because he thinks that Den is a better choice, but that is not his decision, nor is it to be true,” She tells me then looks back at Eric with rage.

             
“How could you do that to me? You made me feel confused! You have caused so much angst and heartache!” I tell him with a fresh wave of pain shivers through my heart, “Wait if Ruk could be the one, why did I first choose Sallack? Fall in love with Parrise?” I ask in confusion.

             
“I’m sorry child, I was trying to help you,” He tells me shamefully.

             
“Sorry for what!” I ask in a scream, waiting for the final blow.

             
“I shadowed Ruk’s heart from connecting to yours when you first met; I thought you needed more time to find the love with Den. I didn’t know Sallack would hurt you in that way child, I thought the romance would run its course and just fade.”

Seeing red, loosing every ambition I have held on to, I pounce at my father, ready to beat my hands on him, but Dallah is quicker than I am;
her arms come out and hold me in place firmly. How could my own father do that to me, all because he wanted me to be with someone he destined a better man for me. What gives him the right to do so? Why the hell would he not want me with Ruk?

I could have avoided all of this, if I had seen the truth in Ruk. I will never forgive my father for this, never will I trust him.

“Eric I am warning you, go now, let her be! You are a selfish man, you will never be the man, the Warrior you were!” My mother tells him.

             
“I think I like what he’s got to say actually,” Den tells us, grinning.

             
“Really Den, then I have a few words for Ruk,” She steps up to Ruk from where he stands watching in complete rage, “Ruk, do not let Eric’s words interfere with your heart. You are a fierce Warrior, you can keep my daughter safe, I trust you with her heart, but the choice is not mine,” She tells him with regret.

Pushing everyone out of my way, I make it to the bed as I sit on the edge and breathe heavily through t
he near panic attack. Catching Ruk watching me, I bow my head down away from the sadness in his eyes.

             
“Dallah,” I take her hand and pull her down to sit beside me.

             
“
I can’t do this, I can’t breathe, I have never been so scared in my whole life,
” I tell her telepathically, as I want this to be a private conversation.

             
“
Shall we transport away from it all
,” She asks me with tears in her eyes. I wish I were strong enough to cry, but I can’t, I feel empty.

             
“
No I am not weak
.”

             
“
That isn’t weak sweetie
.”

             
“I need to concentrate on tonight, how could they do this now?
!”

             
“
Den saw how close you were to Ruk and panicked
.”

             
“
Did you know that Den has been in love with me
?”

             
“
Yes
,” she tells me with a sigh.

             
“
Damn it, why the fuck is this happening
!”

             
“
Who do you want Zara
?”

             
“
Ruk, I want Ruk
.” I tell her looking her in the eye, and this is when I let my heart feel the words.

             
“
But you love Den, you don’t want to hurt him
,” she says exactly what I am thinking.

             
“
Will you do me a favor
?”

             
“
Anything
?” She tells me meaning it wholly.

             
“
Help me through this, I need you
.”

             
“
Always
,” She tells me with a beautiful smile.

The
Brothers’, my mother, and my father has not said one word; instead, they watch Delilah and me talk telepathically.

Dallah and I stand up at the same time, and I look at them all in the eye, keeping my head held high.

              “I have to be alone, to go through the words of the spell. I can’t deal with this right now, as I have to concentrate fully on the Bonding tonight.” I tell them, with as much strength as I can manage going into my words.

             
“I need to know if you are in love with me Zara, don’t leave me like this babe?” Den asks as a single tear runs down his cheek.

             
“I have never stopped loving you Den, but it’s not enough anymore. I can’t give you what you want any longer,” I tell him sadly.

Turning to see Ruk, he has his head to the side as if he
cannot stand to hear me speak to Den, as if waiting for me to tell him that I am in love with him.

             
“Ruk?” I ask gently.

             
“Baby, it’s ok,” He tells me, even though I see the heartache through his eyes, which breaks my heart.

I know what he
means; he thinks that I am going to tell him that I cannot be in love with him because I am in love with Den.

I am
so angry and hurt that the choice to fall in love with him without help from others was taken from me, from us, by my fucking FATHER!

“
I’m in love with you Ruk, so in love with you
,” I tell him through our connection.

             
“
Yeah
?” He asks back, with a sigh of happiness.

             
“
Yeah
,” I tell him with a smile.

Turning to my mother, I take her hands in mine.

              “Thank you for being here for me, but I know what I need to do, I have what I need,” I tell her sincerely, nodding my head to her.

             
“I’m so proud of you, we are proud of you. Go save your sister and follow your heart.”

             
“I didn’t mean to hurt you child, I wanted what I thought was best for you. Nothing is easy, especially the life of a Charmer and her Warriors. Remember, that every choice has a consequence,” Eric tells me, full of sadness and regret.

             
“You may not have meant to, but you did hurt me. I will choose who I want to spend my life with! I know better than you think, I know about the consequences. You don’t know Ruk, if you did, you wouldn’t have pushed him away from me! You maybe my father, but I will never see you as my dad. How could you do that to us? Don’t answer that, I can’t listen to this shit right now!” I tell him harshly, and look away from the hurt in his eyes, he has no right to be hurt, not after the lies he has put on Ruk and me.

He vanishes from the room, without another word.

Looking to my mother, she cries a single tear before kissing my cheeks goodbye.

             
“Nothing is forever, but love like it is,” My mother tells me before she vanishes also.

             
“Babe, you will be mine, I have told you it for years, it’s about time you listened,” Den tells me with belief, and in doing so, making Ruk sound feral with his growling.

Den leaves the room and slams the door on the way out, leaving us speechless.

              “Please, can we go down stairs?” I ask Dallah, as I need to get out of this room and mingle with the monsters so that I can think about something else rather than mother fucking destiny! And how fucked up my life is!

             
“Yeah, were already late,” She tells me with a smile to brighten the mood, not that it works.

             
“So, your dad seems a bit of a bad ass, what is he?” Mickey asks with a frown, still trying to work it out.