Blown Away (7 page)

I shook my head, coming to my senses. “I'm sorry. I can't believe I said that.”

“Don't apologize. It's the alcohol. You're probably lonely, too. You'll wake up tomorrow and cringe over this conversation.”

“Aiden, don't.” My frustration welled inside me, becoming anger. “Don't say I only want you because I'm lonely. Or because of Colby.”

His eyes softened. “Drew.”

“I need some time alone. I'll walk back to the motorhome.”

“No. You're not walking back alone.”

I glared at him. “Actually, I am. I'm an adult, Aiden. Stop treating me like I'm made of glass.”

“Everything okay?” the cowboy from earlier called to us.

“It's fine,” Aiden snapped. “Mind your own damn business.”

I left through a door in the bar, my stomach growling in protest. I'd have to settle for some trail mix back at the motorhome.

I'd made it out of the gravel parking lot, the rocks poking my feet through the thin soles of my sandals, when I realized someone was behind me. I turned. It was Aiden, though he didn't seem to be trying to catch up with me.

“What are you doing?” I asked, stopping.

“Just makin' sure you get back okay.”

I let out a deep breath. “I'll be fine, Aiden. I just need some time to myself.”

“I'll keep my distance.”

I shook my head with frustration. “You confuse the hell out of me.”

“I care,” he said softly. “About you. You have no idea how much.”

“What does that
mean
?” I asked earnestly, stepping closer to him. “Because I'm pretty much throwing myself at you here, and you're just patting me on the head and telling me to sleep it off. Do you care about me but not feel any attraction?”

He was silent, his eyes swimming with emotion. “I'm not what you need, Drew.”

“What do I need?” I yelled the words and threw my hands in the air. “I don't even know, so please tell me.”

“I'm not saying I know, either, I just know it's not me. I don't…I can't fuck you like I did that woman you saw me with.”

My face burned with shame. “I'm so sorry I ever brought it up. I'm sorry I was there that night. I'm sorry I even came here trying to prove something that doesn't mean anything.”

“What are you trying to prove?”

“That I can be brave. That I can find something in life that isn't just about working and scraping by. That I can do something that helps people. Something that matters.”

He reached toward me but dropped his hand before it reached my waist. “You're doing that, Drew. You fit here. But I'm not taking you back to my camper and fucking you while you're drunk. You'd hate me tomorrow.”

I scoffed. “I'm not drunk and I would not. Just be honest, Aiden. I don't do it for you. My boobs aren't big enough or whatever it is that rings your bell, I don't have it.”

He smiled and shook his head, looking away. “You have no idea how far from the truth that is.”

“I just want to get in my coffin bunk and be alone.”

“Stay with me,” he said, his tone almost imploring.

“I wouldn't be alone if I did.”

“Take the bedroom. Take the whole damn camper if you want, I'll sleep outside.”

I sighed deeply. “I'm walking back to the motorhome and staying there.”

He nodded. “I'm following you.”

“Everyone will wonder where we went. What about your truck?”

“I'll text Murph. One of them can drive my truck back.”

This was painful. He cared. He'd said it. And he looked so good in his worn jeans, white T-shirt, and hiking boots that I wanted to cry with frustration. I was aching for him to touch me. Even a hug. I hadn't wanted to be touched in so long, and now I only wanted it from him.

“Fine.” I turned back to the road and resumed walking.

As promised, he kept his distance. I tried to think about other things during the thirty-minute trek back to the campground, but nothing worked. Aiden's face swam through my mind: scowling, smiling, and staring at me intensely. I liked every side of him.

When I made it back to the motorhome, I went in and closed the door behind me. The air-conditioning was on, so I pulled my sweaty shirt off over my head to cool off. Then I slipped out of my sandals and into a fresh shirt and crawled up to my bunk.

I tried scrolling through my phone, but nothing held my interest. I set it down and closed my eyes, giving in to my desire to fantasize about Aiden. I wouldn't try not to dream about him anymore, because dreams were all I had.

I palmed my erection and pumped it as I thought about the way Drew looked at me last night, her bright blue eyes full of longing. For
me
.

I like the way you look at me…The way you were with that woman…It's not just about sex.

I had to get her out of my system. This was more than my usual arousal for her. I'd tossed and turned most of the night, hating myself for making her feel bad. She actually wanted me, which I'd never thought would happen.

But what did she want? Just a quick fuck? A few quick fucks? I knew I wouldn't be able to do that and then let her walk away when the chasing trip ended in three weeks.

The way her chest had risen and fallen in the parking lot outside the bar last night when she was upset with me had been so damn sexy. I'd pictured her breathless on my lap as she rode my cock hard and fast.

Feelings had flooded through me as I followed her back to the campground, and they were still there this morning. I wanted so much more than sex with Drew. What I felt for her was almost spiritual. And considering that I avoided feelings whenever possible, I didn't know what to do about it. I
would not
fuck her to alleviate my own frustration. Not ever.

But to alleviate hers? It had been damn hard to say no to that.

I stroked my dick faster, gripping it tighter as I imagined following Drew into the motorhome last night and giving her everything she wanted and more. In my mind, I finally tasted her smooth skin and cupped her firm ass. I stripped off her clothes and buried myself inside her, going right for the hard, balls-deep fuck that would give us the release we both needed. For me, the release wouldn't just be physical. My hand pumped up and down my cock as I imagined a release from this soul-deep craving I had for Drew.

I couldn't hold back my groan as I came hard.

Better. Now I could focus to get out of bed for a run and a shower before we left to chase. I wiped myself off with a washcloth and got to it.

After I showered, I left the small, bare-bones bathroom and returned my stuff to my camper. By the time I got to the usual meeting spot under a big oak tree, everyone else was there making small talk over coffee.

Drew's blond hair was pulled up in a ponytail, making her look young and fresh. Between that and her plain black tank top and cutoff jean shorts, she had a girl-next-door look that was so damn sexy I felt my cock twitching in my jeans just from looking at her.

“Good morning,” she said, meeting my eyes.

“Mornin'.”

“Sounds like we're going to Nebraska.”

I nodded, studying her eyes for a hint of what I'd seen there last night. But all I found was a detached, all-business façade.

“I'm hoping to launch a balloon today,” Murph said. He liked to put his probes in balloons and launch them into twisters.

“That's too fucking dangerous,” I said, shaking my head. “Colby was our best runner.”

He'd always been the one to hang back until the last possible second before letting go of his hold on the massive cloth balloon that held the probes. It increased the chances of getting them into the funnel, but it was risky. I'd always held my breath the entire time he was sprinting toward the truck with a twister at his back.

“We'll launch at a safe point and if it doesn't make it, it doesn't,” Murph said. “What about your probe launcher? Can you try that? This storm could be massive. I'd love to get probes inside it.”

I nodded. “If it works, there's no need for the balloon.”

“We'll go for both,” Murph said.

“Yeah, but—”

“Jesus, Aiden,” Tex said. “Leave your vagina here, okay? We do this every year.”

He sneered at me and I bristled. “Are you fuckin' serious? I fought in a
war
. I lead mountain-climbing expeditions and rescue people from collapsed buildings. You're calling me a pussy?”

He shrugged. “I'm just sayin' lighten up.”

“I'm about calculated risk,” I said, looking at him and then Murph. “It's why I made the probe launcher. I'll free-climb a mountain if there's someone trapped there. But never for an adrenaline rush. And Drew's never done a probe launch.”

“We've got this, man,” Tex said. “Sack up.”

I stepped closer to him, my frustration turning hot in my veins. “Sack up? You know who's got no respect for danger? People who've never faced it. If you're gonna risk your life for shits and grins, have at it. But don't ask Drew to do it. That's not fair.”

“She doesn't have to do it,” Murph said. “She can stay with you for the probe launch.”

I ran a hand through my hair. “Yeah, right. Leaving you, Tex, and Millie to launch a balloon? When you're used to having five people?”

“We'll make the final decision when the time comes,” Murph said. “We need to move out.”

Millie approached Drew. “Hey, will you switch with Tex for the ride? I need someone to quiz me for the summer class I'm taking online. I'm pretty sure Tex won't be able to pronounce the polysyllabic words.”

“I've got some polysyllabic words for you,” Tex said, rolling his eyes at Millie.

“Sure,” Drew said, her eyes darting over to mine for just a second. Was she relieved or disappointed? I'd been hoping we could talk about last night now that she was calmer.

But it wasn't happening. She got into the Funnel Finder with Murph and Millie and I got stuck with Tex, who ran his mouth nonstop about college football for the first hour on the road. He didn't seem to care whether I responded or even paid attention.

Finally, he shut up and left me alone with my thoughts. The hours rolled by and I thought about Drew constantly. I kept replaying last night in my head, wondering if she'd reached out to me because she was vulnerable or desperate.

Or could she actually feel something? An attraction? I couldn't help hoping so, even though she was off-limits.

It wasn't just because she'd been Colby's girl. I was a loner. Had been for thirteen years now. I didn't do closeness.

Drew was reaching out to a man for what I assumed was the first time since Colby's death. But she was reaching out to someone who didn't know how to reach back. I was walled off inside, and she deserved better.

We got to the storm site in Nebraska late that afternoon. As soon as Drew stepped out of Murph's car, my eyes instinctively locked on her. I'd missed her light, sweet scent next to me in my truck today. Not to mention her warm laugh and the way she turned sideways in her seat to face me when we were talking. Having her attention lit me up like nothing else.

There was a light drizzle falling. I got my probe launcher out so I'd be prepared to fire it fast if needed. I felt the same nervous energy I'd gotten when going into a fight as a soldier. This time I wasn't fighting other men, but a tornado. It was the brother of the one that had taken my family from me, which made it my enemy.

I was up for anything that would help save people from the wrath storms could bring. They blew in and changed people's worlds in a matter of minutes. The more we could learn about them, the more warning people would have. This was the only way I could honor my family.

Drew stood alone, studying the murky sky. I got a pen and paper from my truck's glove box and approached her.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hey.” Her voice wasn't cold or warm, just neutral. I didn't like it. I was used to her voice sounding the way honey tasted—sweet and rich.

“So, if you want to record conditions and times in this notebook…we never know how big a storm will be, and sometimes it's nice to have notes to look back on. Just keep track of rain, lightning, wind and anything else you see. Note the time if something changes.”

I went to hand her the pen and notebook, and the pen slipped out of my hand.

Fucking hell. I'd dropped it right at her feet, and I'd have to get within a few inches of her bare legs to retrieve it.

I bent down to get it, keeping my gaze focused on the ground. But once there, the urge was too powerful to resist. I glanced at her toned, smooth legs. My mouth was so damn close to her thigh. Close enough to lean in and taste her skin. Run my lips up to the frayed edge of her cutoffs. I wanted to put my hands on the backs of her calves and slide them slowly up, taking in every inch of her skin.

The sound of a closing car door distracted me. I looked over at Murph, who had pulled out the bright yellow bag he kept his balloon in and dropped it to the ground.

“Gotcha,” Drew said. “Take notes on what I see.”

I handed her the pen and walked over to the spot next to the road where Murph was opening the bag.

“Decision made, then?” I said.

He nodded, not meeting my eyes. “If we can get probes in from the gun and the balloon, I won't launch a balloon next time. I have to get probes into a twister this season. There's competition for research funding and I can't risk losing my program.”

“Okay. I didn't realize.”

Murph sighed deeply, looking from side to side to make sure no one else was in earshot. “We stopped early last year, which was the right call after Colby's death. There's a lot on the line this year.”

I bent down to help him get the equipment out. “So we launch both. We're gonna make this work, Murph.”

He still wouldn't look at me, but I could see uncertainty in his eyes as he pushed his glasses up. “If your probe gun works, you're gonna be in high demand.”

I gave a grunt of surprise. “High demand?”

“Other teams will want you. Bigger teams. Rock star ones. You could get funding for a team of your own if you wanted.”

His insecurity hit me in the gut. Even after all this time, he didn't get me.

“Murph.” He looked up at me. “It's
our
probe launcher. I never would've developed it without the experience I got on this team. I like storm chasing, but my rescue classes and climbing expeditions are my work. I'm not giving those up. If the gun works, you take the credit for it.”

His eyes widened with surprise. “It's not that I want the credit, but…I don't want to lose you from my team.”

“We're good, then. This is the only team I plan to be on.”

A corner of his mouth crooked up in a smile. “Good.”

I furrowed my brow at him. “You sayin' we're not rock stars? 'Cause I think we're pretty badass.”

A loud whistle made us both turn. Millie was waving us over. We grabbed our gear and hustled to the grassy spot where she stood with Drew and Tex.

“I think it's close,” she said softly. “I have a feeling.”

Sometimes gut feelings were our best guide. I agreed with Millie. The sky had been swirling when we got here but was completely still now. It was time.

“I'm a good runner,” Drew said. “I want to help with the balloon. I was always just as fast as Colby.”

Murph nodded. “We need everyone. Just make sure you listen for my directions.”

“Stay next to me,” I said, moving to her side.

“Got it,” Tex said, pointing toward the horizon. I followed his finger to the gray funnel swirling in the distance. My stomach clenched with a knot of excited tension. The twister was blowing our way, asking me if I was ready to go.

Fuck yes I was. I set my launcher on my shoulder and located the tornado in the makeshift scope I'd added to it. It made its way closer and I waited. Timing was everything. Too soon and the probes wouldn't make it far enough.

“Into the cornfield,” Murph said, yelling over the sound of whipping wind and flying cornstalks. “Everyone grab onto the balloon.”

“Be right there,” I said.

The twister came closer, taunting me. Asking me if I could keep my cool long enough or if I was dying to shoot it too soon. I kept my finger light on the trigger. Dirt and sand showered my face and arms, taking me back to the times when I'd kept cool under gunfire in sandstorms. My peripheral vision picked up a tree flying in an arc nearby. Near, but not so close it would hit me. I kept my eyes focused on the funnel cloud, bending my knees to fight the wind's powerful pull. One shot, and it had to be right on. My heart pounded rapid fire.

Within seconds, it was time. I fired and tossed the launcher into the back of my truck, taking off to join the team. I didn't even look to see if the probes made it.

They were already spreading out the massive balloon. The twister's wind whipped Drew's ponytail straight into the air. I grabbed an edge of the balloon's fabric and watched as it filled with wind and came to life.

“Hold it,” Murph yelled over the roar of the approaching storm. “Not yet.”

I turned to Drew, my heart ready to explode in my chest from worry for her. “When we let go, you turn and run like hell for my truck. Don't stop for anything. Get inside and keep your head covered.”

She nodded, her lips set in a determined line. Surely she was scared out of her damn mind right now. Being this close to a tornado for the first time would do it to anyone. But she'd volunteered, and I couldn't help admiring her strength even as I worried about her.

The wind was whipping at our clothes now. I dug my heels into the muddy cornfield, the roar of the storm invading my senses. Murph needed to call this within a few seconds.

“Now!” he yelled, letting go and watching the balloon. I released it and watched as Drew did the same. She lost her footing for a second but steadied herself quickly.

We ran like hell was at our backs, because it was. I felt the pounding of footsteps around me and knew we were all in a tight cluster. The mud should've slowed us down, but we didn't have time to let it.

Drew
was
fast. She was a couple steps ahead of me, where I could keep her in my line of sight. That was how I saw her slip in a mud puddle in the field. Her hands went out to brace her fall. I reached an arm out to get her before she hit, but Tex beat me to it.