Black Lies White Lies (22 page)

“Good morning, Daddy, you ready for breakfast?”

“Yes, give me a minute and I’ll be down.”

“That’s fine. I’m going to get down there and make sure the kids are ok.”

I walked into the kitchen, “Sidney and Justin, you’re all ready? Who dressed you two?”

“Daddy. Is Granddaddy coming down?”

“Yes, Baby, he’s getting dressed.”

“Momma, is Granddaddy staying with us for a while?”

“I hope so, Baby. We will have to convince him. Do you want him here?”

“Yes, Momma, I want him to stay.”

“Well, Justin my Man, we will just have to make that happen.”

“Granddaddy! You’re here! Do you want some pancakes?”

“Daddy, you want some coffee? It’s fresh. Rosa just made it.”

“Good morning to you, Mr. Robinson.”

“Rosa’s coffee is delicious.”

“Thank you, Rosa, don’t mind if I do.” If I didn’t know better, I would think Rosa was flirting with my father. My father has always been a handsome man. When he smiles, it lights up any room.

“I’m going to drop the kids off at school. Bryan should be down soon.”

“Go ahead. Don’t worry about me. Rosa is taking excellent care of me.”

“Did you hear that, Rosa, you better watch out for him?”

“I hear you, Mrs. Davis,” she said grinning. 

“Come on, Kids. Let’s get going, we don’t want to be late.” I dropped the kids off and called Sabrina, “Hey, are you at home yet?”

“No, but I’m on my street, what’s up?”

“I’ll tell you when I get there.” I pulled in Sabrina’s driveway. She was out front waiting.

“What’s going on, Sandra? It sounded urgent. Come on in and have some coffee.” We went to the kitchen. I told her as she poured the coffee, “Sabrina, Daddy is seriously sick.”

“What do you mean he’s awful sick?”

“I mean he’s got liver cancer.”

“Are you serious? Liver cancer?”

“Yes. He told me and Bryan last night.”

“I knew he was a lot sicker than Aunt Sally was telling us. I’m going to make sure he stays here now.”

“Sabrina, he has agreed to stay here.”

“He did? He must be terribly sick because he would never agree to that.”

“I’m going to see how soon he can leave his job when I get back home.”

“I wished he wouldn’t go back to that slave driving place.”

“You know Daddy, Sabrina, he’s going to try and leave on a good note.”

“I know, but they have worked my daddy to the grave. You know what, Sandra? I think a lot of this cancer stuff comes from stress. Daddy has worked hard with little to show for it. Now it’s time for us to take care of him for a change.”

“I agree with you there. If we don’t, who will?”

“Bryan said he knows some terrific cancer doctors here in Memphis. I’m willing to take him wherever he needs to go to get the best treatment.”

“I’m with you on that and don’t worry about what it costs. Who’s going to call Candice?”

“I think we should wait. She’s in the middle of planning her wedding. We’ll tell her if things take a turn for the worst.”

“I’ll be over after I get back from the doctor with Anthony.”

“Ok. I’m going to get back to the house before Bryan leaves.”

“You know what, Sandra? That husband of yours never ceases to amaze me.”

“I know. He’s one of a kind. I’m out of here. See you later.”

When I arrived back home, Daddy was sitting in the garden. “Daddy, are you ok?”

“Yes, just thought I would take in some of this fresh air. Bryan said he was going to the church and would call you later. Don’t you have something to do besides babysitting me? I don’t want your life to stop because of me. I’m not going to let this beat me. I’m going to keep going until I drop.”

“Daddy, have you given any serious thought about living here with us?”

“I’m not sure what I want to do, but I am sure I don’t want to be a burden.”

“Daddy, Sandra and I talked and we want you to move up here and let us take care of you.”

“What about my job, my house, my life?”

“Bryan will find you a job and you can have your own space here. This house is big enough for two families.”

He just sat there soaking up the sun. I was beginning to wonder if he’d heard me. Finally he spoke. “Just let me go back home get some things in order.”

“How long do you think that will take? We need to get your doctors to transfer all your files here.” I was so relieved.

“I won’t take long, I promise. Just give me a couple of weeks.” Daddy left the next day. I wished he could have stayed longer.

Chapter 18

Paxton called. He was leaving for Atlanta and Craig had some sketches he needed me to approve. I headed to the design studio. Craig had fabric samples for me to look at. “These are some of what I had in mind, but the color scheme is a little off.”

“That’s something we can work on. Have you had any more ideas on which sketches you would like to use?”

“No, I had family down for the weekend and didn’t get much work done.”

“Sandra, is it ok if I call you that?”

“Yes. Is there something wrong?”

“In a way. We’re going to be working closely, and working a lot of long hours. We’re going to have to put a lot of things aside if we want to show at fashion week. Let me just say this, family comes before anything. Sandra, and I’m here to help you as much as I can, but you have to work with me. Is this something you seriously want to do?”

“I have a lot going on right now, but this is a dream of mine.”

“So let’s try and put this dream into action.”

We worked a lot that week with me still managing to get home at decent hours so Bryan didn’t complain. Time just seemed to fly when Craig and I worked together. He was funny and charming. He knew a lot of the top designers. He always dressed as if he was expecting the President to walk through the door. “What’s your story?” I asked Craig.

“Which one would you like to hear? I’ve got a million.”

“How did you get into designing?”

“Let’s take a break while I tell you. This might take a minute.” We got some coffee and sat down on the sofa. “Ok. Where do I start? I always wanted to be in fashion, model or something. I always wore a tie, even in school. Guys used to say I was gay. It used to hurt my feelings, but I just kept wearing my jackets and ties.”

“Are you gay? Not that it matters”

“No, just a man who loves fashion. I don’t like sports the way other guys do. I’m just a business man and a lover of fashion. Before my mother died, I promised her that I would live my life and follow my dreams. And I have done both. I’ve been all over the world. I have always lived my life, not according to what people say, but by doing what makes me happy. You see, Sandra, life is really but a dream, and it’s how you dream that truly matters. Now, that’s my story. What’s yours?”

“There’s not much to tell. I always wanted to either design or own my own boutique. This is just the tip of the iceberg for me.”

“Paxton tells me you’re married to a pastor. How does he feel about your dreams?”

“He was a bit reluctant at first, but he seems ok with it now.”

“Really? Just wait until your dreams start taking off. Things will change.”

“I don’t think so,” but deep down inside, I knew he was right.

“Well, we better get back to work. I have to make sure you get home on time.” We went back to our work. I realized Craig had never mentioned a girlfriend or anyone specific in his story.

I got home that night before Bryan, helped the kids with their homework, fed them dinner and got them ready for bed. Bryan was late getting home. It was 10:30 and still no Bryan. I called his phone and it went straight to voice mail. This was really was making me uneasy, but I wasn’t going to panic. I’d give it a few more minutes before I started calling the highway patrol.

I showered, checked my phone and still nothing. Finally, around 11:30, Bryan walked through the door. “I’m sorry, Sandra. Something terrible has happened.”

“What’s wrong?”

“My father passed. I was over at the house with my family.”

“I’m so sorry, Bryan,” I went to hug him and he pushed me away. I was surprised, but maybe Bryan was still in shock. “What’s the matter? Why won’t you let me hug you?”

“I’m not sure how I feel right now, Sandra.” The tears started rolling down his face.

“Bryan, you have to tell me what’s wrong.”

“My whole life has been a lie...”

“What do you mean?”

“My father wasn’t at home when he died.”

“You’re not making sense, was he at the church?”

“He was at his mistress’s house, that’s where he was.” Now I was in shock. “All these years he told me be a standup guy, keep your family together. He was living the biggest lie ever.” He stopped crying. “He had been with this woman for twenty five years. You know what? She has three children!” This couldn’t be happening. “My father was a man of God!”

“Bryan, you have to stop this. Your father was human. We all make mistakes. Your putting your father in shoes he couldn’t fill.”

“What are you saying? That it’s ok for him to have another family?”

“No. No. I’m saying pull yourself together.”

“You don’t realize what this will do to our family, Sandra.”

“Bryan, our family will be ok, you’re overreacting.”

“I think you’re underreacting. My family is not like yours, Sandra.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I didn’t mean that. I’m just saying.”

“I know what you meant, that your family is somehow better. You live in this glass house where life is perfect. I’ve got news for you. Nobody is perfect.”

“Let’s not fight about this. I’m going to get a bag together and go stay with my mother. She’s going to need our support right now.”

“Are your brothers there, with your mother?”

“They are, but I need to be there also.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Please, Sandra, just try and understand.” Sure, I thought. I always understood when it came to him putting other people before me.

After Bryan left I just sat there thinking about his mother. She must be incredibly upset right now. How does a man carry on an affair for twenty five years and you never know? She loved the lifestyle of a pastor’s wife. She had looked the other way. Now I knew why she was so bitter, living in a house of pretend.

The next day I called Paxton’s to tell Craig I wouldn’t be there. I was putting my life on hold again.

~~~

Bryan wasn’t himself the entire week after he buried his father. This thing with the other woman had really shaken him. He was always at the church doing something, but that Sunday he didn’t attend. I went to at least make his excuses for whatever reason. I was going to have a talk with him today. He couldn’t avoid this forever.

After Sunday dinner, Bryan was still in a somber mood. “Bryan, we need to talk.”

“Not now, Sandra. I’m not in the mood.”

“Well get in the mood, because you can’t let this thing with your father destroy you.”

“Sandra, please, just let this alone. I’ve got to sort things out with myself.”

“You say you got to sort things out? Your father is gone and if this keeps on I’ll be gone too. I’m tired of being alone to deal with things. Your father had an affair, deal with it and move on.”

“You don’t understand. I can’t move on. Sandra, I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me. My father was everything to me. I am who I am because of him.”

“Maybe you need to seek counseling from the brothers of the church.”

“I can’t even show my face there because of my father’s lies.”

“You’re your own man, Bryan. Your father was his own man.”

“Sandra, his other family are members of my church and I didn’t even know.”

“How could you know? It was your father’s secrets. Bryan, did your mother know about this affair?”

“Yes and she never told me or my brothers. That is the one thing I don’t understand.”

“Maybe it’s not for you to understand, Bryan. Your mother must have had her reasons. Just accept them and move on.”

“I’m trying to, Sandra.”

“Just speak to the brothers. It can’t hurt. I’m sure they know all about it.”

“Were you serious? When you said you were leaving?”

“No. I just wanted you to pay attention. Your real family is right here.” I kissed him. “Don’t let this destroy what you have left.”

“Sandra, you and the kids are the most valuable things in my life. I will do whatever it takes to make sure I don’t lose that.”

Chapter 19

It was all too surreal, hearing from my sister. For the first time ever, I’d heard her apologize. I wished I could fly down to be with them at Sabrina’s, but there wasn’t enough time for a flight and I still wasn’t feeling that well. It seemed I’d had either the flu or this stomach bug for some time. I needed to go to the doctor instead of taking this over the counter medicine.