Beautiful Misery (The Beautiful Series) (5 page)

Unable to answer I only smiled.
Once Gage started moving faster it didn’t take long to get me to the edge. Gage grabbed my hips as he slammed into me, over and over. Gripping onto the edge of the desk I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Gage! Oh God!”

As I was coming back down from my Gage induced high I felt his body tense before he ground out, “Fuck, Cobie.”

Gage leaned over top of me and kissed my forehead. Leaning back up, he moved my panties back into place. I took a few deep breaths before sliding off the desk and smoothing my dress out.

Gage took a few steps back as h
e pulled his boxers and pants up. He buttoned his jeans and ran his hands over his shirt. The moonlight shining in was casting a shadow across his face making him look like walking sin. Which he was. He was walking sin and I fell right into his trap. Gage looked up at me, watching closely.

He looked good post sex. I was sure I looked like a wreck.

“Do you know how beautiful you are Cobie? Or how wrong I was to just fuck you?”

Pursing my
lips I took a few short breaths. “Gage it was no big deal. It’s not like either of us want anything out of it. It was a one-time thing. Stop worrying about it.”

Gage nodded and turned away from
me, looking out the window. I could still see his side profile in the shadows. He looked broken. I could see the moons reflection bouncing off the ocean and the waves crashing on the shore. It looked magical.

I could see the concern and what looked like hurt on Gage’s face. “Ok, well I’m going to go. I told Jenna I would go with her in the morning to get everything for Evie’s birthday.”

Gage didn’t say anything.

Opening the door I paused just before I shut it behind me and I swore I heard Gage tell me he was sorry. Walking down the hall I felt reality c
rashing down on me. I just used Gage to get back at Bray. What kind of person does that?

“Fuck!” I yelled, banging my head on the wall. I hadn’t taken my birth cont
rol since I hooked up with Bray. Pulling my phone out of my purse I went to the calendar application. Counting the days I let out the breath I had been holding. Thank God, I wasn’t ovulating.

No more revenge fucks for me
. I wasn’t that kind of person.

Walking quickly to the bar I grabbed an empty stool and waited for the bartender.

“What can I get you?” The cute bartender asked.

“Shots. Lots and lots of shots.”

Laughing, she said, “We talking hard shit or something pink and girly?”

Looking back at the door I had just walked out of I said, “Hardest shit you got.”

Raising her eyebrows she grabbed a shot glass and a bottle of tequila. “Guessing you’re having men problems?”

Huffing I replied, “Fuck ‘em. No wait, that’s my problem. I can’t stop doin
’ that.” Reaching for the filled shot glass I looked at the bartender. “And now you think I’m a whore, awesome.”

Smiling she said, “Honey, I can’t judge you. I got pregnant in high school, my family disowned me, my baby’s father was killed in Iraq and his family hates me.”

Swallowing the liquid I shoved the glass back to her and said, “Here, maybe you need a shot too. By the way, my name is Cobie. Not that that is important.”

Filling the glass she slid it back to me. “Drink up, this ones on me. And my name is Annie.”

B
eep. Beep. Beep.

Forcing my eyes open I grabbed my phone. What the hell? What time was it?

8:00 A.M.
my phone was blinking at me. Dragging my butt out of bed I tossed my suitcase onto the bed. I was still sore and being sore made me think of Gage. I shouldn’t be thinking of him. He was just for one night. I blame the tequila. Stupid alcohol.

Coffee. I needed coffee. That would make everything better.

Shuffling around the bed, thankfully I looked in the mirror. I looked like a zombie that had been mauled by another zombie. First, I needed to shower. Then coffee.

Stumbling into the bathroom I sat down on the toilet I heard a knock on my door then Evie’s excited voice breaking through the silence. “Weady? We go shopping! I be two!”

Pulling my panties
up just as Evie busted through the door, I smiled. “Shh, Aunt Co has a headache. Let me get a hot shower and coffee then we can go shopping.”

“Otay. Wub you.” Evie wrapped her arms around my legs before turning and running out of the room.

I loved that silly little girl.

After getting a shower I
felt a million times better. I wandered downstairs, Jenna had insisted I stay at her mom’s house. Looking into the living room I saw a very happy Jenna and Larkin watching their daughter playing on the floor.

“Hey, Evie Grace! Are you ready to go shopping? Aunt Co has a lot of toys to buy and just a little time to do it. Your birthday party is tomorrow and we have a lot to do today.”

Evie jumped off the floor, ran to Larkin and kissed his cheek, “Bye bye daddy. Me get wotsa toys!”

Larkin laughed at Evie before kissing Jenna and
rubbing her stomach. Jenna smiled at Larkin and whispered something in his ear before getting off his lap and lifting a very excited Evie into her arms.

“Ok babygirl, let’s go. Mommy is already exhausted.”

After our day of shopping, I agreed to have dinner with Jenna’s family. They made me feel at home, feel like I was family.

F
eeling tiny hands rubbing my cheek, I opened my eyes and was met with the cutest little face.

“My pawty today! Wet’s go!” Evie squealed, clapping her hands.

Grabbing her, I pulled her into the bed and gave her a big hug. “I can’t believe you’re almost two! Before I know it you will be all grown up. Then what will I do? You’re going to be my best girl, until forever, right?” I asked as I kissed her cheek.

Evie rolled her eyes and sigh
ed, “I be best girl tiwa I has boyfwiend.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. I love this kid.

“Ok, but no boys until you’re married.”

Evie smiled, “Tay. Tan we go now?”

“I can’t tell the birthday princess no, can I?”

Evie shook her head hard. “No!”

“Ok then, let’s go.”

Taking a quick shower, I grabbed my towel and wrapped it around me. I forgot my clothes in the room I had been staying in
. Cracking the door open I peeked out. Nobody. Fully opening the door I took a step out and just as I looked down to check my towel I smacked into the wall. The wall caused me to lose my balance. Starting to fall backwards, I flailed my arms in the air. Attempting to grab anything to catch myself. Sucking in my breath when I felt arms wrapping around my waist, setting me upright and that deep voice in my ear.

“Woah, there gorgeous. Trying to pull off the Matrix?”

I felt myself shiver and not from the cool air. But from that cool, smooth voice. Struggling to find my words I wrapped my arms around my falling towel. This wasn’t embarrassing or anything. Forcing a smile I turned to find Gage, leaning against the wall. A knowing smirk on his gorgeous face.

Asstwat.

“Actually, that damn wall came out of nowhere and tried to kill me.” I flung my hand towards the wall and forced a laugh.

Smooth, Cobie. Really smooth.

“Good thing I was here. I just saved your life from the killer wall. Guess you owe me now.”

Instantly I dropped my eyes to the dark hardwood floor.
No guy had ever made me nervous like this.

Running my foot along the lines of two wood floor boards I mumbled, “Yeah, I guess. Now that I’m safe, I need to get ready. See you at the party.”

Shouldering past Gage, I felt my cheeks heating.

“Cobie, wait. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. Just trying to make you smile. I love your smile.” Gage reached up and
ran the pad of his thumb over my bottom lip. “Gorgeous.”

One night. One night. One night.
It was just a one night thing. No more.

I had to keep reminding myself he was a one night thing. Nothing more, nothing l
ess. We had our one night. Now it was time to tuck it into my insanely sexy memories and move on.

I knew he was in love with Jenna. Hell, even Stevie Wonder could see that. No matter how attracted to him I was, I couldn’t be second best. I couldn’t be the other girl. And, from what I had heard from my brother and Jenna and seen on T.V. and in magazines, Gage was a man whore. He used woman. He only wanted sex and the occasional arm candy at an event. I couldn’t be arm candy. I wouldn’t be arm candy. I
don’t think he had used me that night but I had used him. That was bad enough. He had tried to stop me. Stop us. But I pushed him. I wanted it. I wanted him. Just one time.

Looking at him now, I could see the emptiness in his eyes. His ice blue eyes were dull, void of emotion. The only time I saw his eyes light up was when he saw Jenna. I wasn’t and never would be Jenna. Gage and I had sexual chemistry but, emotionally we were both unavailable. I couldn’t be who he wanted and he couldn’t be the guy I wanted.

Why did I always go for the players? The men who only want one thing from women, the ones who always hurt me?

“Gage, stop please. I can’t d
o this. I don’t want games. The other night was…it was satisfying- but we both know this is going nowhere.” Forcing myself to turn away I opened my bedroom door.

Gage’s strained voice stopped me, “I’ll see you at the party, right?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.” I smiled over my shoulder before closing the door.

Dropping my towel on the bed I grabbed the bikini I was planning on wearing u
nder my simple cotton, strapless dress.

Once I was dressed and had my hair pulled back into a messy bun
, I slipped on my flip flops and made my way to the beach. I promised Jenna I would help her set everything up for the party.

“About time you got your cute little ass down here,” Jenna joked.

“Damn woman! When did you get down here? I told you I would help. I didn’t know I would need to be down here at the ass crack of dawn.”

Jenna pursed her lips. “I have only been down here an hour or so. I made your brother help carry everything down.
Used him for his muscles.”

“He’s good for that,” I laughed.

The next few hours were spent covering tables, anchoring balloons in the sand, setting the giant flower arrangement centerpieces, and carefully placing the princess castle cake on the table.

Seeing how happy Evie was with all her new presents almost made me wish I had a baby. Almost.

I had a lot of goals to reach before I even thought about having a kid, hell before I even thought about getting married. If that even happened. Maybe I was destined to be one of those freak cat ladies with fifty seven cats and no friends. Maybe that was my future?

5

Cobie

9
WEEKS LATER

H
olding that little stick in my hand I sat on the edge of my bed. Deep breaths, just keep taking deep breaths.

In. Out. In. Out.
In. Out.

“How could this have happened?” I mumbled to myself.

Grabbing my phone I unlocked it and text Jenna. She may be twenty two hundred miles away but she would know what to do.

Me:
You awake? I messed up.

Jenna: Yep. What’s up?

Me: I’m pregnant

I kept it simple and t
o the point. Now I had to wait for her response and hopefully it wouldn’t be from my brother. My phone was ringing. Shit. Looking at the screen I saw Jenna’s face.

Phew.

Taking a deep breath I answered, “Jenna! What am I going to do?”

“Cobie. How the hell did you get yourself into this predicament?” Jenna asked.

Flopping back on my bed I sighed. “I’m pretty sure we both know how I got myself into this mess. Now I need to figure out what I’m going to do.”

Jenna was silent but I could hear her breathing. She took a deep breath and said
, “Cobie, don’t do what I did to your brother. Tell the father. Is it Larkin’s old friend? The one you were telling me about at Evie’s party. What was his name, Braylon?”

Huffing I said more to myself than Jenna, “I’m not sure.”

“You’re not sure? How are you not sure?” Jenna asked. I could hear the irritation in her voice.

“I mean, it was just the one time with Bray.”

Jenna snorted, “You do know it only takes one time, right?”

Rolling my eyes I replied, “Yes, smartass I know that. What I was going to say before you cut in was a
few weeks later I kinda hooked up with someone else. Sort of like a revenge thing. I had stopped taking my birth control right after Bray but I did the math and when I slept with the other guy I shouldn’t have been ovulating. But I guess Bray or the other guy could be the dad.” Covering my face with my hand I felt my tears. “Oh God. What kind of mom doesn’t even know who the father of her baby is?”

“Oh honey. The best thing would be go to the doctor, they can gi
ve you the conception date, or close to it. Using that date you should be able to determine who the father is since you said there was a gap between the two guys. Who is the other guy? And, you do know your brother is going to kill whoever got you pregnant, right?”

Sucki
ng in a breath I ran my bottom teeth across my top lip. I wasn’t sure if I should tell her the truth. Should I tell her that there is a good chance Gage is the father of my baby?

“I’m not so worried about Larkin with this, it’s you I’m worried about.”

Jenna asked confused, “Me? Why would you be worried about me? Babe, not too long ago I was you. I’m not about to judge you for the same thing I did.”

“Because the other guy is…” I trailed off.

“The other guy is, who?”

“Gage.
” I barely got his name out before I slammed my hand over my mouth.

I could hear Jenna’s intake of breath. I know she loves my brother but she and Gage have something special. I don’t want her to hate me for possibly having his child.

“Jenna? Are you still there?” I asked quietly.

“Um yeah, stil
l here. Just surprised I guess. I knew the night of his opening he was going to go for you. I warned him but that dicklicker didn’t listen.”

I stood up from my bed and paced my floor. “
He tried to stop me. I sorta pushed him into it. He told me not to but something inside of me wanted to get back at Bray. It was just one time in his office. I never thought this would happen. If I even had a clue that I would end up pregnant I wouldn’t have had sex with him. I swear, Jenna.”

“
Co, I know exactly how you feel. I was in the exact same boat as you just a few years ago. But, I am not about to be the one who breaks this to your brother. He is going to shit a brick.”

“Yeah, no shit,
” I snorted.

Jenna sighed before saying, “Ok, well make a doctor appointment and get the conception date. Do you want me to fly out and go with you?”

“Would you, please?” I asked, relieved. I didn’t want to sound like the whiney little sister but Jenna was the closest thing I had to a sister and I needed her.

“Of course I will. I am always here for you. Make your appointment then let me know when it is. I have to go, Evie will be waking up soon but text me with the info. Love you, Co.”

“Thank you, Jenna. I will call now to make the appointment. Kiss my girl and tell her Aunt Co loves her.”

“Ok, good luck,
” Jenna said.

I hit the
END
button.

Pulling up my Gynecologist’s number I called to make my
appointment.

My appointment was in three days. Now I had to tell my mom.

Before facing my mom I pulled my text messages up to text Jenna.

Me: My appointment is on Thursday at 11am. Thanks so much for everything.

Jenna: We will be there. You’re Welcome xo

Tossing my phone onto my desk I rubbed my hand over my belly. Worrying my bottom lip with my teeth I opened my door and walked down the stairs. I saw my mom sitting in her chair by the fireplace, reading. When she heard me she looked up from her book.

“Hey, sweetie,” My mom said as I walked into the room.

I sat on the couch and pulled my feet under me. I looked at my mom and saw her smile fade from her face.
Carrie Nayler was the coolest mom, but you couldn’t pull one over on her.

“You’re pregnant, aren’
t you?” She asked me, surprisingly calm.

Dumbfounded I dropped my eyes to the floor. “How did you know?”

My mom got up from her chair and took a few steps so she was standing in front of me. Placing her hand under my chin she tilted my head back so I was looking at her. She shrugged and softly said, “Call it mother’s intuition. I have had a hunch for about a week, I was just waiting for you to tell me.”

“You really are super mom aren’t you?”

My mom smiled before sitting down beside me.

“You’re not pissed or screaming, why?” I asked nervously.

“Sweetie, you’re an adult. Having sex was your choice and you knew what could happen. I’m not thrilled but you know I support you no matter what. I really wish you were through with med school and married before having a baby but it’s too late now. Have you told Bray yet?”

Scrunching my brows I asked, “How did you know about Bray?”

“I heard you talking to Jenna at Evie’s party. Does he know?”

Here comes the even harder part. How does a girl tell her mom that she’s not sure who the father is, well at least not until I go to the doctor. Using both hands I
covered my face. “I haven’t told him yet.” I stopped just long enough to peek between my fingers and see that my mom was studying me.

“Because…” She said slowly
narrowing her eyes, trying to get me to finish what I needed to say.

“Chewing my bottom lip I said, “Because I’m not sure if he’s the father.”

My mom let her head roll on her shoulders and rubbed her temples. “Oh, Cobie Renea. What have you gotten yourself into? Who do you think the father is?”

I could hear the disappointment in my mom’s voice. I hated myself for letting her down but there was no changing things now.

“I’m so sorry, mom. I never thought this would happen. I was always so careful. I had only been with Bray until I went to his apartment and some hoe answered his door. I mean I was only with Bray one time but it still hurt. When we were in Alabama I was still upset…”

My mom cut me off. “It was Gage wasn’t it?”

Jerking my head to look at her I asked, “How the hell? How do you know everything?”

My mom smiled. “I saw the way he was watching you at
Larkin and Jenna’s wedding. When I saw the two of you at Evie’s party it kinda confirmed my suspicions. You two wouldn’t even look at each other, avoiding one another like the plague. Is he who you think the father is?”

Shrugging I said, “I really don’t know. I mean if I had to guess
, most likely it is but I don’t want to say anything until I get the conception date from my doctor. I was with Bray right after I got off my period. So really neither of them add up but I don’t know.”

My mom rested her hand on my shoulder. “Everything will be ok, honey. You’re going to
have a baby. A little earlier than expected but you will be amazing. You’re not in this alone. If Gage is the dad, I know he will step up and be the dad your baby deserves. After Larkin told me what Gage did for Jenna I have no doubt he will do nothing short of giving your baby the world.”

“I know he would be a great dad but I don’t know if we co
uld work things out. We are two completely different people. He is in love with Jenna, I’m not her.”

My
mom leaned back, letting her head lay on the arm of the couch. “You can’t always get what you want. Life isn’t always pretty but I promise you once you’re holding your baby this problem won’t seem so big. The two of you will make things work for your baby.”

“You always know what to say to make everything better.” I hugged my mom tightly.

I heard my mom’s voice break as she spoke, “One day soon, sweetie, you will understand.”

“
Talking about soon. I have an appointment in two days. Jenna is flying in and will probably be here sometime tomorrow.”

“
Jenna’s coming? She’s bringing Evie, right?” My mom asked, a little more excitedly.

“She didn’t say. But, if I had to guess, yes. I don’t think she would leave Evie.”

My mom’s smile was slowly coming back. “Maybe I will get lucky and your brother will tag along. I just hate that he’s all the way in California.”

Ugh! I hope not. But I kept that thought to myself. My mom didn’t need to know that I was more afraid to tell my brother I was pregnant than I was her. I said,
“He’s doing what he loves mom. It’s not like you never see him. I think we have seen him more in the last few years than we did the whole time he was in high school.”

Nodding, my mom
stood and said, “Sweetie, I have a few errands I need to run today. You’re welcome to join.”

I frowned
. “No thanks, mom. I think I will call my student advisor and start talking about taking a semester off.”

“Just a semester? I don’t want you changing your life just because you’re having a baby. I will help any way possible so you can finish med school. I want you to achieve your dream.”

I stood up and smiled. “Yes, mom. Just one semester so I can have the baby and recover. I plan to go back for spring semester.”

“Good.” Grabbing her purse off the table she was out the door and waving bye.

“
C
obie Nayler?” The nurse called from the doorway.

Standing, I took a deep breath. My mom and Jenna followed me into the small room.

“Ok, Miss Nayler, I need you to remove your skirt and panties. You can use this sheet to cover with until the doctor examines you.”

I took the sheet from the nurse
and smiled. “Thank you.”

She gave a polite smile back and said, “You’re welcome. Good luck, Miss Nayler.”

Once the nurse left my room I looked at my mom who looked like she was on the verge of tears. And Jenna, who looked just as nervous as me.

“Honey, you going to take your cloth
es off or are you going to see if the doctor has x-ray vision?” My mom tried joking but I could hear the sadness in her voice.

“I just needed a second, mom. I feel like I could vomit any minute.”

Mom and Jenna both laughed. Jenna said, “That would be morning sickness, doll. Sucks ass. Evie about killed me. But it gets better after a few months.”

My eyes widened. “Months of feeling like this? Nobody said anything about feeling like total shit.”