Yesterday's Heroes (Consortium of Chaos Book 1) (15 page)

He shrugged.  “Damned if I know. 
They were helping out this weird alien race and their ship got lost or
something.  I never really got the specifics.”

She frowned.  “I’m sorry.  That
must have been tough on you though.  To be left alone to…”

He laughed again.  “Oh yeah.  I was
totally crying.”  He laughed harder.  “Hell, Peter and I had a party that day. 
Went to live with my aunt, and things were better after that.”  He stared at
the floor for a long moment.  “I don’t know where they are, but wherever it
is…I hope they’re
miserable
.”

She was silent, trying to think of
something to say.  She couldn’t think of anything comforting or cool to say
though, so she just went with what she was actually thinking.  “Damn.  Now I
know why their action figures were the peg warmers that season.  The stores
couldn’t GIVE them away; they were everywhere and no one wanted them.  I’m glad
I never bought one.”

He broke out laughing.  He pointed
to a room.  “I’ll take that one.”

It was across the hall from hers.  “Okay. 
I’ll tell HR.”

A
shepherd, watching his mule feeding in a meadow, became alarmed by the cries of
the enemy.  He told the mule to run with him, lest they both be captured, but
the animal lazily replied, "Why should I?  Do you think it likely the conqueror
will place on me two sets of packs?'  "No," rejoined the shepherd. 
"Then," said the mule, "as long as I carry a pack, why does it
matter to me whom I serve?' The moral of the story?  In a change of government,
the humble change nothing beyond the name of their master.

The next day, Harlot she found herself
pacing in front of his Wyatt’s room.  She needed to think of some excuse why
she could go in there.  Something she could use as a pretext to go see what he
was doing.  It was
SURE
to be something heroic, secret and cool.  It
didn’t even have to be a GOOD excuse.  Anything would do, actually.

Holly walked by whistling a
Christmas carol and Harlot motioned her over.  “Holl, help me out here.  Can
you think of any reason I can give for why I need to see him?”

Holly nodded.  “Don’t worry.  I got
this…”  She pounded on the door.  “Hey!  Open up!  Harlot wants you to go
shopping with us, then come home and fuc…”

Harlot slapped a hand over her mouth
and the other woman laughed.  “What?  It’s the truth isn’t it?”

Harlot’s eyes narrowed.  “Absolutely
not.  I don’t know what you’re….”

Wyatt’s door flew open and he stood
there in a towel.  “What does she want me to do when we get home?”

Harlot blinked.  “Umm…
focus
on…fixing a…um…CHAIR!”

Wyatt squinted.  “Isn’t your dad
like a carpenter or something?  Shouldn’t he be the one to fix it?”

She nodded.  “Absolutely.  That’s
what I told Holly, but she said…..Well, never mind.”

He shook his head in confusion and disappeared
back into his room.  Harlot viewed the unlocked door as an open invitation to
go into the room.  He didn’t close the door, and in the world of the Consortium
Volcano Crater Lair, an unlocked door was the equivalent of having one of those
welcome mats that said ‘
Come on in, y’all!’
  She looked around the
Spartan interior and didn’t see anything set up yet.  In fact, if it wasn’t for
his briefcase and a travel alarm clock, the room would have looked exactly like
it had yesterday; empty.  “So, do you need help unpacking or something?”

He popped his head out of the small
closet area which had a sink in it.  “What do you mean?  I already did.”

She frowned.  “But where’s all your
stuff?  I mean, you were a HERO!  You should have like pictures with the president,
and keys to the city, and crap all around, you know?  Where is it?”

He shrugged.  “Beats me.  Probably
still in storage at Squad headquarters.  I didn’t bother to take it with me
when I left.  I don’t need that junk cluttering up my walls.”

She absently picked up the alarm
clock and looked down at it.  A small blue face with his picture next to
Peter’s when they were much younger, and before they became full members of the
Freedom Squad. 

She smiled.  “I have this same one
only in pink.  They’re quite collectible you know; I paid $225 for mine a
couple years ago.  Got a STEAL on it.  I have the set now, except for the
yellow one.”  She nodded casually.  “Cause it was only released in Canada.  It
TALKS!
 
Coolest thing in the world.  A major grail for collectors.”

Wyatt put on his tie and rapidly
began to knot it.  “Well, I got a box of them somewhere.  The company sent them
to us when they were making them.  Don’t know where they are, but if I find
them, they’re yours.”

She brightened.  “Really?  You have
a yellow one?”

He scoffed.  “Shit, I don’t know. 
Probably.  I know Peter used to use a green one and…”

She bounced to her feet.  “Green? 
I’ve never heard of a green one before!  Neat!  Do you know where he put it?”

Wyatt rolled his eyes and out on
his overcoat.  “He was
buried
with it.”  He deadpanned.  “How should I
know?  It’s just a stupid alarm clock, keeping up to date records on its
location isn’t tops on my list.”

She waived the clock at him.  “This
is a Brookes, okay?  They only made this model for a year and then they lost
the license to Americana Clocks, and the design switched to the full Freedom
Squad team.  The Fabricator/Continuum version is MUCH rarer.”

He made a non-committal sound.  “Yes,
I’m sure.”  He picked up his briefcase.  “I am ready to go.”  He paused. 
“Where are we going, again?”

She beamed, forgetting her
annoyance with his negativity.  She carefully replaced the collectible back on
the nightstand.  “Holly and I are going shopping!”

He put his briefcase down.  “I do
not shop.  I was under the impression that this was Consortium business.”

Holly lounged in the doorway,
absently sucking on a candy cane.  “Oh, stop being so Grinchy.  This is
totally
Consortium business.  Harl and I have to go steal a part I need for my weather
machine.”

He picked up his briefcase again.  “In
that case, I am ready to assist you.”  He walked towards the door.  “We can go
over the plan on the way.”

Holly scoffed.  “Plan?  We don’t…umm…really
have
a plan.  We’re just going to go there and get the last part she
needs.  That…
is
the plan.”

Wyatt stopped and stared at her in
shock.  “Wait…You’re telling me that you’re building it
one piece at a time?
 
You
really
started building something before obtaining all the necessary
pieces?”  He slowly started banging his head against the wall.  “So, did it
ever occur to you geniuses that the
heroes
might be watching what you
try to steal, guess what those pieces can be used to build and…I don’t know…
wait
for you to try to take the last piece
?  We’re going to go get it, and find
a dozen of them in the parking lot waiting for us now.  Super.”  He rested his
head against the wall.  “Okay.  I need to talk to The Commodore, and see if you
can institute a new rule:  ‘No building doomsday devices one piece at a time. 
Steal everything the same day, so no one can figure out what you’re
constructing and try to stop you from completing it.’”

Holly squinted in thought and then
pointed the candy cane at him.  “Actually…yeah.  Yeah, that’s a pretty good
idea.”

Wyatt nodded.  “Isn’t it though?  I
think you’ll find I’m
full
of good advice on how
not
to be a
careless incompetent idiot.  Hell, I spent years as a hero mastering the skill
on my former teammates.  They were all idiots too.”  He looked around the room. 
“This is just like being home.”

Holly’s eyes narrowed.  “Did you
just call me an idiot,
New Guy
?”

He looked appalled.  “No.  I called
you a
careless
idiot.”  He sighed.  “You’re
obviously
smarter
than you act, so please try to use your
brain
before you get us all
caught and thrown in jail.”

Holly shook her head.  “I don’t
think I like you.  In fact, I’m fairly certain that I
don’t
.”

Wyatt shrugged and pushed passed
her into the hallway.  “Yes, I’m crushed.  Which way are the vehicles?”

Harlot hurried after him.  “They’re
this way.  I really think you’re being too hard on Holly, though.  To be fair,
the device started out as a death ray redesign, it’s only
recently
become a weather machine.”

Wyatt rolled his eyes, again.  “Another
death ray?  How many times are you guys going to try that before you realize
that it’s
not going to work
?  Huh?  You’ve done the Death Ray thing like
three dozen times now, and every time the Freedom Squad shuts you down.”

Holly went back to eating her
candy.  “Well, MY ideas certainly can’t compare to YOUR wondrous plan, that’s
for sure. 
Pain shall be their only comfort; loneliness their only friend,
and
all that.  What’s
science
compared to that kind of clear thinking?”

Harlot put up her hands to stop the
fight.  “Come on, guys.  Can’t we just go steal this thing and stop arguing?”

Wyatt laughed.  “Why would we stop
arguing?  Hell, that seems to be all you people DO here.  Argue, get caught and
think up new ways to endanger the rest of us.”

Holly didn’t bother to remove the
candy cane from her mouth and it garbled her words slightly. 
“
Well, we
sure lack YOUR team spirit.  Hey, I got an idea, how about you call in all your
hero buddies and you guys can put on a presentation on how a
REAL
team
should behave.  Partnership and trust.  And THEN you can kill them and crush
their dreams.  That’ll be a fun day.  I’ll mark it on my advent calendar.”

Harlot laughed nervously.  “Yeah….Holl’s
always got an advent calendar going.  Cause she…um….loves Christmas…Oh hey
look!  It’s Hazard!  Hi, Hazz!  Wyatt and I are just going to go to the….”

Gurrier eyed Wyatt calmly.  “I hope
you
die
on that mission
.”
  Then he stormed off again.

Wyatt nodded like it was the
reaction he expected, and looked around the hallway.  “I can feel the love in
these walls.”

Harlot laughed.  “Well, you can’t
exactly blame him.  I mean you HAVE tried to arrest him and ruin his plans
for….umm….years now.  Even
before
he joined up with us.  I think he’s…justified
in being a LITTLE hesitant about your recent…change of heart.”

Wyatt pressed the button to open
the door to the motor pool.  “Yes, how silly of me.  I should have thought
about how
HE
felt when I was trying to keep him from burning down the
state legislature.”  He shook his head sadly.  “Poor man.  How I’ve mistreated
him.”

Harlot nodded.  Excellent!  He was
finally seeing things clearly now.  “Yep.  He really held a grudge about that
one.”

Holly tossed the wrapper to her
candy cane into the garbage.  “So you maybe want to go over your big plan with
us again?”

Wyatt shrugged.  “Not really, no. 
It’s pretty simple: those bastards all have feet of clay, and I mean to break
them down.  Knock them off their pedestals into the dirt with the rest of us.”

Harlot nodded.  “And why do you
want to do that exactly?”

He grabbed a set of keys off of a
hook and glanced around looking for the car they belonged to.  “I have my
reasons.”

Holly sighed.  “I’ve already heard
this before.  Your mysterious act is getting old, you know.”

He ignored her and stalked towards
the car which matched the key.  “Then stop
asking
about it
.  I
will let you know when it comes time to play your part.”

She rolled her eyes again. 
“Joy
to the world.”

Wyatt stood in front of the
vehicle, his near perpetual frown deepening.  “And why do you people
buy
cars like this?”  He gestured to the shiny black SUV with heavily tinted
windows.  “It’s the most evil looking vehicle I can
possibly
imagine
which doesn’t have
human skulls
glued to it.  The goal is to NOT be seen
on these kinds of missions, people!  You should buy piece of shit 4-doors or
something that goes under the radar.”

Harlot nodded.  “You mean like the
Liberty Cycle?  The Freedom Chopper?  The Freedom…”

He cut her off.  “Those weren’t MY
idea either.  Hero or villain, you people make the SAME mistakes.  I told them
that it’s asinine to drive those things around too, but no one ever listened to
me.  I always say that we should have one set of vehicles for when we want to
be seen, and another set for when we don’t.  But no one listened to me THEN
either.  So I had to drive that stupid goddamn motorcycle all over this town. 
You ever show up at the grocery store on a red, white and blue rocket bike? 
Huh?  There are
few
things as embarrassing, let me tell you.  And
there’s
NO PLACE TO PUT THE FUCKING GROCERIES!”

Holly ignored him.  “Yes, poor
man.  You heroes have it so rough.”

Harlot grabbed the keys from his
hand.  “I’ll drive.”

Wyatt stood in silence for a minute
and then got into the backseat.

A
man went to the market, looking to buy a mule, and arranged to take one home on
trial to see what it was like. When he reached home, he put it into his stable
along with the other mules.  The newcomer looked around, and immediately went
and chose a place next to the laziest and greediest beast in the stable. When
the master saw this, he led him off and handed him back to his owner again. The
latter was surprised to see him back so soon, and said, "You mean to say
you have tested him already?" "I don't want to put him through any
more tests," replied the other. "I could see what sort of beast he is
from the companion he chose for himself."  The moral of the story?  A man
is known by the company he keeps.

Forty-five minutes later, they had
arrived at the laboratory and were trying to find their way inside.  It was
located behind a locked gate and up a long drive in a sparsely wooded area
along the river.  The building itself was an industrial looking three story affair,
nothing extraordinary. 

Harlot was still having a BLAST though! 
This was a lot of fun.  Like having the other team’s best player switch
uniforms to your team halfway through the big game and TOTALLY rule.  She
beamed over at Wyatt, again.  “I’m just so happy to have you on OUR team for
once.  If we run into anyone, they don’t stand a CHANCE now!”

Wyatt sighed and sliced the lock
off of the chain-link fence with a quickly constructed blade.  “I’m not
ON
your team, Harlot.  I am merely taking over control of it in order to achieve
my mission, and then I will leave this place and never look back.”

She waived a dismissive hand. 
“Nonsense.  You live with us.  You’re going to meetings now.  Hell, your
costume will even be ready soon.  Face it, you’re one of US now.  This is just
so cool!”

He made a face.  “Okay, let’s get
one thing straight.  I am NOT wearing one of your uniforms.  Okay?”  He pointed
at his suit and overcoat.  “THIS is my uniform from now on.  I’m
through
with capes.”

She laughed.  “Nope.  If you belong
to the Consortium, you HAVE to wear one of our costumes until you design a new
one!”  She clapped her hands together.  “OOOOHH!  What if you went back to that
costume you used to wear in the mid 90’s?  You know?  The blue one?  That one
was awesome looking!  …Of course, we’ll have to rework the sleeves cause they
were a little too puffy for today’s look, and there were too many pockets on the
outfit…”  She paused.  “…Hey, what did you PUT in those pockets, anyway?  Cause
you guys all had like….”

Holly finished the thought.  “…Yeah,
you all had like a hundred pockets on everything.  Pockets on pockets.”

Harlot nodded.  “….On pockets, on…”

Wyatt held up a hand.  “
Stop
saying pockets!” 
He took a deep breath to calm himself
. 
“I didn’t
keep anything in them.  I never liked them there and it wasn’t my choice to
have them.”

Harlot blinked at him.  “Someone
else
told you
that you had to wear clothes with pockets all over them?” 
She squinted in confusion as she tried to imagine that.  “Weird.”

Holly frowned.  “Umm…Fabricator? 
How OLD were you in the nineties?  Cause if you were ANY older than seven, no
one should be telling you to wear clothes with….”

He made an aggravated sound.  “
DON’T
say pockets.”

“Ummm…..compartments?”

He sighed again and marched down
the driveways towards the laboratory.  “If I can choose my uniform, then I
choose what I’m currently wearing.”  He paused.  “And I’m
definitely
not
going with that blue and black one.  The pants were WAY too tight and I hated
that fucking cape with a passion.”

Holly grinned.  “Hey, I LIKED the
pants being that tight.”  She turned to look at her.  “Hey, Harl?  Remember
when he first started wearing that super tight-fitting costume, and you started
calling him ‘Fabric-Hater’?  Hell, that costume was half the reason I spent so
much time in Harlot’s room.  We sat around for hours staring at your…”

Harlot elbowed her.  He did NOT
need to know about her momentary infatuation with him.  She was a COLLECTOR,
not a stalker or something.  Her concern was entirely unnecessary though, as
Wyatt didn’t appear to be listening anyway. 

Holly laughed.  “Hey, Wyatt?  On a
completely
different
subject, you ever see
Misery
?  Didn’t you
think Kathy Bates got a bad rap?  I mean, stalkers can be….”

Harlot elbowed her again.  Wyatt still
didn’t appear to notice, and continued scanning the area.  “And we’re sure this
is the right place?”

Harlot scoffed.  “Yeah.  It’s the
only laboratory creating weird science gizmos in town.  This is
always
the place to find the weird science-y stuff.”

Wyatt nodded.  “So where is it
stored?”

Harlot blinked in confusion.  “What
do you mean?  Why are you asking me?  I don’t know.”

He stared at her for a beat as if
in disbelief.  “Because I don’t know what we’re here to steal, and you need to
tell me if I’m going to help.”

She gasped as the realization hit
her, and stopped walking in the middle of the driveway.  “Wait…wait…
I’M
supposed to know what we’re here to steal?  You should be asking Holly!  She
does the weapons stuff.  I’m in charge of the ninja stuff. 
Everyone
knows that.”

Holly scoffed and pointed a finger
at her.  “Oh, hell no!  You do the super thief stuff, and I do the weapons
stuff!  That’s the way it’s ALWAYS been!  This is obviously a super thief type
of situation.  Stealing science things falls SQUARELY on the thief’s shoulders
and figuring out how to USE said science gizmo is the weapons designer’s
responsibility.”

Harlot opened her mouth to continue
arguing the issue, but Wyatt cut her off by giving a long suffering sigh.  He
pinched the bridge of his nose.  “Holly…..”

“Missile-Tow.”

“What?”

Holly crossed her arms over her
chest.  “You have to call me by my code name.”

He shook his head.  “No, I will not
call you that.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s stupid.  I refuse to
use that name, even on mission.”

Her mouth fell open and her voice
took on an insulted tone.  “
It is not stupid!”

He started walking towards the
laboratory again.  “I’m sorry, but it is.”  

Harlot blinked.  Wow.  He was
really taking this stuff seriously.  “On mission?  Really, Wyatt?  What is
this?  “The ‘Nam all of a sudden?”  She laughed.  “Hell, usually Holl and I
bring takeout to a job like this.  Calm down.”

Wyatt nodded and ducked into the
shadows.  “Let me ask you girls a question: how many
successful
missions
like this have you been on?”

Holly thought for a minute.  “Ummm….not
too many, actually.  Usually, we do this and then run into the capes and we
fight and get beat down.  Then we quick grab the thingy and escape, only to
return to the hideout and find that some capes tracked us back there somehow
and then we get captured and…”

Wyatt nodded, cutting her off.  “Exactly. 
Well, today we’re
changing
that game.”

She frowned.  “How?”

“Well, for one thing we’re going to
make sure no one plants any tiny radio transmitters on us.  For another, we’re
going to
assume
that the heroes are in there, or soon will be, and plan
accordingly.”

“Plan how?”

“Let me worry about that.  You guys
worry about finding out what the all-important gizmo is exactly.  Especially
since you don’t even know what it looks like.”

Harlot rolled her eyes, taking on a
sarcastic tone.  “Don’t worry, I Google image searched ‘anti-matter + neo-genic
+ nuclear + ‘something or other’’ before we left, so I have a good idea of what
we’re looking for now.”

Wyatt shook his head sadly.  “I’m
amazed
you people are still alive.”

Holly put her hands on her hips and
scowled in indignation.  “For your
information,
New Guy, we are FULLY
capable of doing this
WITHOUT
you.  You can’t just come in here and
start rearranging our decorations to suit your own tastes.  This is
OUR
CHRISTMAS PARTY!”

He made a “shushing” sound.  “Holly…
Missile-Tow
,
please keep it down.  We’re trying to be
stealthy
here.”

Holly’s eyes narrowed and turned to
Harlot.  “Oh, we’re trying to be
STEALTHY,
Harl.”  She gestured to him
in contempt.  “Thank
GOD
‘Captain Wonderful’ is here to tell us that. 
Here I was going to start practicing my caroling or something!”

Wyatt peered through the foliage at
the building.  “Well, I
do
question why you included
jingle-bells
on
your uniform. 
Everyone
can hear you coming from a mile off.”

She scoffed.  “Well, we don’t ALL
have people to dress us even after we reach adulthood, FABRICATOR. 
SOME
of us have to struggle through by…”

Harlot gestured for them both to be
quiet.  “Come on guys.  Concentrate here.  Wyatt needs to find us a way in
there so we can grab the whatever-it-is and go home.  Okay?”  She leaned over
to Holly so that Wyatt couldn’t hear.  “This is his first mission with us. 
Come on!  TRY to act professional.”

Holly’s voice went up an octave;
all but shouting.  “
WHO’S NOT PROFESSIONAL!  I’M VERY PROFESSIONAL!” 
They
both “shushed” her again and she returned to a loud whisper.  “And why is he in
charge of this mission
anyway?
  He’s just
The
New Guy
.  He
should be fetching us hot coco or something.”

Harlot sighed.  “He’s not in charge
of this mission; I am.”

Wyatt rolled his eyes.  “No, she’s
right. 
I’m
in charge.  I’m in charge because I’m the only one of you
with a plan.”

Harlot scowled.  “Plan?  What
plan?”

He turned around to look at her.  “One
thing you should know about me; I ALWAYS have a plan.”  He pointed at the
building.  “Holly, circle around back and see if you can find a way in.  Harlot
and I will go around front.  If you see a cape…”

Holly brightened.  “Kick his ass?” 
She asked, hopefully.

He rolled his eyes.  “Just don’t
get caught, okay?  Call for us and we’ll….”

Holly frowned.  “I don’t need YOUR
help,
New Guy
.  I’m fully capable of taking care of myself.  That’s one
of the advantages of being an immortal magical entity; you learn how to take
care of yourself within the first few hundred years.”  She paused.  “…AND you
learn to dress yourself pretty early on, and you can wear as many jingle-bells
as you
FUCKING WANT!
”

Harlot “shushed” her again.  “Holl? 
Just please do it, okay?”

Holly’s scowl deepened but she
trudged off towards the back of the laboratory, the jingle-bell on her Santa
hat jingling.

Wyatt started to make his way
towards the front of the building.  “I’m SHOCKED we haven’t been discovered
yet.”

Harlot laughed and ran to catch up
with him, not bothering to stay out of the light.  Jesus.  He was waaaaay too
uptight about this.  If the heroes were in there, they already knew they were
here.  And if they WEREN’T in there, then it didn’t matter how stealthy or
un-stealthy they were, because there was no one in there to discover them,
anyway.  So why worry needlessly? 

She looked up at the sky and
absently tried to name the shapes she saw.  “Hey, Wyatt?  Did you actually know
the guy who played you in the old
Freedom Squad
TV series?  ‘Cause I
don’t think he had your mannerisms right.  I mean, he was good at your hair
flip thing, but…”

There was a sigh from bushes to her
right where Wyatt was concealing himself, and he stepped out into the light
beside her.  “This just isn’t going to happen is it?  I’m trying to drag you
people into some
modicum
of professionalism, but you just can’t even…” 
He stopped, a frown crossing his pretty face.  “Wait…hair flip?  What the hell
is that?”

She laughed.  “Oh come on!  You
HAVE to know the hair flip thing!  You ALWAYS do it!  Here, I can do it pretty
good…”  She took a few steps back and put on her best impression of his
stance.  And then pointed at him.  “Surrender, villain!”  She turned her head
suddenly, causing her mane of black hair to toss in the breeze.  “In the name
of FREEDOM!”

Wyatt stared at her a long moment,
a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.  “Nope.  Doesn’t look familiar. 
Do it again.”

She started to repeat the action and
then stopped.  “Now you’re just teasing me, aren’t you?”

He laughed softly and continued
walking towards the door.  “Yeah.  Maybe.  But no, I’m not going to be doing
any
hair flipping
anytime soon.”

She nodded and hurried to catch up,
again.  “Well,
obviously
.  I mean, you cut your hair…which is a travesty
by the way.  That hair was like…your THING, you know?  But you can’t say that
anymore, anyway, ‘cause that was your HERO thing.  You need a villain thing,” she
smiled dreamily.  “…now that you’re on
our
team.”

He shook his head, again.  “I’m not
ON your team.  I’m more of…an outside contractor.”

She rolled her eyes.  “Uh-huh.” 
She glanced over her shoulder to make sure they weren’t overheard.  “So…what do
you think your NEW catch phrase is going to be?  Huh?  Have you thought of one
yet?  Because I can help you with that if you wanted…”

He stopped walking and turned to
look at her.  “I’m not going to
have
a catch phrase. 
Heroes
have
catch phrases.  Outside contractors have
jobs
.”

She swatted at his chest.  “ALL
villains have a catch phrase!  Come on!”

He stared at her a moment.  “Okay,
I’ll bite.  What’s
your
catch phrase then, Harlot?  Wow me.”