Worthy of Redemption (34 page)

“And you went to see a plastic surgeon,” he said darkly.

I had not told him about my consultation. I used my own money for it. Luke was against me using my own money for just about anything, but I specifically wanted to use my own money for this, especially since I didn’t want him to know, but he had found out.

“How do you know about that?” I asked quietly.

“They called your phone while you were in the shower the other day. I answered. Why the hell are you seeing a plastic surgeon?”

“I need some work done. It’s no big deal.”

“You don’t need any work done and you were never into being plastic before. Why now?”

I stared up at the ceiling. “Just because. It’s my decision, right?” I asked, trying to keep it light.

“It is your decision,” he agreed softly. “But it’s not like you.”

“I guess we’re all being someone we’re not lately,” I said before I could stop myself.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Luke hang his head. I hurt him, but I guess I was still hurting, too.

“Em, I wouldn’t change anything about you. I think every part of you is perfect.”

I palmed my chest. It ached. A lot.

“Will you please come downstairs and eat something? You love Sam’s cooking.”

“Maybe later,” I lied.

He sat there quietly, deep in his own thoughts. Finally, he asked a question I wasn’t expecting. “Do you want to…separate? Do you want to leave me?”

I looked at him, stunned. “I never said that.”

“You act like it. You’re acting happy when you’re not and I’ve tried everything to try to prove to you how sorry I am how much I want
you
. What I did has not only devastated you but it’s devastated
me
. I don’t know what else to do.”

“Luke, it’s been two weeks,” I spat out. “I would think that you would give me a little more time. It took you nearly two years for you to stop being angry about what I did to you.”

He ran his hands through his hair. “Emmy, I just don’t want to find out six months from now that you can’t get over it.”

“I don’t know what you want from me,” I said. “I’m handling it the best way I know how.”

“I just…I just want to know what you’re thinking,” he said, looking desperate.

“You don’t want to know what I’m thinking,” I snickered without humor.

“Damn it! Emmy, I just told you that’s what I want from you!”

I looked at him again. I sat up and turned around to face him, crossing my legs.

“Okay. Here it is,” I said. “Every morning that you have to go into the office, I feel like I can’t breathe. I put on a good show when you’re leaving, but once you’re out the door, I have to struggle to
breathe
, Luke, because I don’t know – will today be the day you run into Iris? What will you say? What will she say? What will you
do
? Will today be the day that she walks into the office despite what you told her? And will you let her in and close the door? What will happen behind that closed door? Will today be a day when you say you’re working late but you’re really with her?”

Luke’s eyes were huge and his mouth was slightly ajar. He started to speak, but I held my hand up. “Oh, I’m not finished yet,” I snapped. “I wonder how long you guys have been talking as more than friends. I wonder at what point you knew you were out of line and what did you think that made you continue. I think about how you told her she was beautiful and sexy while I’m walking around with baby vomit in my hair and my fat flabby ass. I wonder how many times you’ve kissed her before, if you’ve touched her, if you’ve made her come. I wonder what you think is wrong with
me
– what am I lacking that would make you even turn your head to look at someone else. I wonder how you could do this after all the hell we had gone through to get to the happy place we were in – at least I thought it as a happy place. And…”

I stopped. I had said enough. He didn’t need to know the rest of it. His eyes were already tearing up. I hated how I could bring this big, strong, sexy man to tears with my words and actions. I didn’t think any less of him for crying, but I thought less of myself for making him do so.

“And what?” he swallowed. “Finish.”

“I’ve said enough,” I said softly and looked down at my hands.

“But you haven’t said everything you’re thinking. Say it all,” he snapped.

I swallowed hard and couldn’t meet his eyes.

“Just fucking say it!” he yelled.

Instead of telling him the rest of my thoughts, I shifted onto my knees
and wrapped my arms around him. He held me close and buried his face in my hair.

“I never touched her before that day, I swear,” he said, his voice weak. “I liked her but I didn’t think anything of it until she said something on
that
day. There is nothing that you are lacking, Emmy. You’re perfect.”

“My mom thinks I have unattractive hair and need to join a gym,” I said.

“Your mom is a crackpot,” Luke said and I laughed. He pulled back a little to look at my face. “Please don’t get plastic surgery. When I say you’re perfect, I mean it.”

“Luke…did you kiss her or did she kiss you?” I asked the question that had been on my mind ever since it happened.

“No, Em, she kissed me.”

“But you kissed her back,” I said, frowning.

“No, baby, I did not. I was so shocked I just stood there,” he sighed and shook his head. “I can’t believe I just stood there like that.”

“But she said she was touching you. Was she?”

“A little bit,” he admitted, looking at me with apprehension. “Mostly she kept touching my arms.”

I ran my hands over his perfect biceps. “Well…you do have yummy looking arms.”

“But they’re yours, not hers,” he said sadly.

“I think
she gets that now,” I said. I climbed onto his lap and rested my head on his shoulder.

“Have I told you I loved you lately?” Luke softly said as he stroked my hair.

“No,” I smiled. “You should sing it to me.”

In a sexy, sweet, singing voice of a hot, hot angel, Luke began to sing
Lately
by Tyrese. By the time he reached the end of the song, I had turned and straddled him.

“I love you, too,” I said and brought my mouth to his. Luke put his hands under my shirt and caressed my back. My hands were roving over his strong shoulders and arms but I wanted to feel his skin on mine. I pulled back from the kiss and quickly started to unbutton his shirt. I got frustrated and tore it open and helped him shrug out of it.

“Someone is a little eager,” he grinned as his hands tugged at the hem of my shirt.

“Just take my damn shirt off,” I commanded and kissed his lips.

With a chuckle, he pulled my shirt off and threw it to the floor. My bra landed on top of that seconds later.

“Did you lock the door when you came in?” I asked him as I kissed along his jawline.

“Nope. Hopefully your mom will have enough sense to know what’s going on up here.”

“She probably knew it was going to happen before us,” I said rolling my eyes.

“Mmm,” he murmured as I nipped at his neck. “You’re probably right. She’s the one that sent me up here. I started to just text you, but she gave me a hard time.”

“Well, let’s not disappoint her,” I said, pressing my breasts against his bare chest.

“I can’t wait for these to stop being a source of food,” Luke frowned as he massaged one breast.

“If you don’t want a source of food all over you, I suggest you make your hand migrate south.”

Luke flipped me onto my back on the bed, making me squeal. He kissed me as one hand unbuttoned my jeans and pulled down the zipper. His hand slid under my panties. I moaned and squirmed as he palmed my clit before slipping a finger inside of me. He sat up suddenly and started to pull my jeans and panties off.

“Someone is a little eager,” I repeated his words.

“Very,” he agreed as he pulled off his own pants and boxers.

He crawled back on top of me and kissed me again. His monstrous penis rubbed against my clit. I moaned into Luke’s mouth and pushed my hips up to increase the friction. He pumped his hips, making the whole length of his cock slide across my clit.

“Shall I make you come like this?” Luke asked, propping himself up on his arms.

“Yes,” I moaned. “Please.”

“You don’t have to beg me, baby,” he panted as he increased the friction and speed. He groaned and said “You’re so moist, Em.”

I could feel how wet I was as his cock spread my moisture over my clit. I could feel my first orgasm building. Luke leaned down and kissed me again. My moans grew louder as I climbed towards my climax. Just as I began to come, Luke slammed his cock inside of me, sending my orgasm into hyper-drive. He covered my mouth with his hand as I screamed. It was so painfully exquisite, being stretched and violated by his massive erection. After almost a year and a half of having it on a fairly regular basis, I was still surprised by his length and girth once it was inside of me.

Luke held still until my orgasm began to subside. He took his hand off of my mouth and pulled one leg up under his arm, making him go impossibly deeper. I tensed up and put my hands on his abs as an attempt to keep him from going in any further.

“I’m yours and you are mine,” he said firmly. “I’m going to have you
all the way
and you are going to have me
all the way
.”

“Too much,” I grunted as I felt him press a little deeper.

“I need to feel you, Emmy,” Luke said and with one quick thrust, he was nearly balls deep. I had to cover my own mouth to keep from crying out.

“Mmm,” Luke moaned as he swirled his hips. “You feel me?”

“How can I not?” I bit out.

He grinned as he reached for my other leg. I didn’t fight him on it this time. I knew he was going to be so deep inside of me that I was going to feel like his dick was coming out of my mouth, but he wanted me and I wanted him – all the way. He pulled out until just the head of his cock was inside of me as he held both of my legs.

“Ready?” he asked, smiling down at me.

“How can I possibly prepare to be invaded by your obscene freak of nature?” I asked, bracing myself.

Without any further preamble, Luke drove his cock inside of me until he was balls deep. He groaned very loud and there was no hand to muffle the yelp that escaped my lips. If there was any question as to what we were doing up here, it was answered.

“You feel so fucking good,” Luke said, pulling out. He thrust into me again and I cried out again. “You’re so fucking perfect, Em,” he growled as he began to ride me hard and fast.

I felt like I was being torn apart, but it felt so damn good at the same time. I couldn’t be quiet if I tried. Luke suddenly rolled over, holding on to me, so that when I was upright I was impaled on his beautiful cock.

“Oh my god!” I screamed. It was deeper than before and I wasn’t sure if I could take it.

Luke grabbed my hips, holding me in place as he moved his hips in a slow, agonizing circle.

“You’re so beautiful, Emmy, so perfect,” Luke groaned as he started to pump his cock into me. “Come on my cock, baby! Shit, I’m going to come! You feel too damn...fucking…PERFECT!” he yelled as he began to spurt inside of me.

I was sobbing through my own orgasm as I felt his cream filling me. My whole body was suddenly weak. I collapsed onto Luke’s chest, still impaled on his erection.

“I love you so much,” Luke whispered in my ear.

I had only shed tears when I spoke to Donya on that crazy day. I didn’t cry again after that, but it suddenly hit me how much I could have lost that day. With my head resting on Luke’s chest, a deluge of tears forced its way out of my eyes. He wrapped his arms tightly around me and whispered loving words in my ear while I allowed myself to fall to pieces.

~~~

Early the following morning, Luke drove my parents to the airport for their return trip home. My father never gave any indication that he had heard anything the night before, but as my mother was walking out the door, I heard her tell Luke that maybe I needed to wear a muzzle in the bedroom. I didn’t say anything to her, because she was walking in the right direction –
away from me
.

Diana
arrived moments later, a plan perfectly executed by yours truly. Luke would be gone for about two hours, because the trip to O’Hare wasn’t fun, but it gave me just enough time to go do what I needed to do.

On a Saturday, it took me about half the usual weekday time to get into the city. I drove all the way because parking would also be a cinch. I popped some change in the meter a little ways down the street and walked into the store. There were about a dozen people in there enjoying fresh pastries and coffee, chatting, or reading, or tapping on tablets, completely oblivious to what was about to go down. Iris stood behind the counter watching me warily.

“Can I have a blueberry muffin please?” I asked kindly.