Worth the Risk (14 page)

Meredith stared at him, seeing every broken piece. Acknowledging that they hadn’t been put back together properly. Yet somehow, they still made him into the beautiful, compassionate man sitting in front of her.

“Does it have to do that?” she asked softly. “Is it even what you want? To be peaceful?”

“Isn’t that what everyone wants?” His reply was just shy of bitter.

“No.”

“No?”

“Were you peaceful
before
all of that happened?”

He blinked at her like the question had never occurred to him before. “I don’t know. I suppose not really.”

“And you want to keep saving people.”

“Yes.”

“Even if you somehow manage to find closure.”

“Yes.”

“I think maybe you feel like you can’t let go of the past because you’re scared you
will
find peace. But saving people is who you
are
, Sam. Nothing can change that.”

She watched him digest her words. He glanced away, then back again, and swallowed. His expression wasn’t exactly unreadable, but it wasn’t one Meredith could pinpoint, either. He seemed...relieved, almost.

“Back in the hotel, how long did you say we’ve known each other?” he asked.

She knew exactly which conversation he was referencing. “About five seconds.”

She waited for him to toss her words back into her face. Instead, he raised an eyebrow.

“Five seconds. But somehow, you manage to see more of me than I see of myself.”

She smiled. “Hearing you say that makes me feel like I should apologize.”

“Funny. It makes me feel like I owe you another one.”

“Oh, really?”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“So what does that put the score at?”

“Let’s see. I saved you from falling off a building. Saved you from getting kidnapped.”

“And saved me from myself. For the half point. Wouldn’t want to let that one go.”

A sexy half smile made his blue eyes sparkle. “Definitely not.”

“But I saved the two of us from getting shot. And I smashed that guy—a cop, no less—in the head for you.”

“I got us safely out of my apartment building.”

Meredith shook her head. “Only because you got us
in
to your apartment building in the first place. Negates itself.”

“Fine,” Sam conceded. “I’m guessing that lighting a fire to save us negates itself, too?”

“No. I’ll let you have that one.”

“Kind of you. So then. I’m at three and a half. And you’re at three.”

“Um, not quite. Don’t forget to put my dragging your butt into the bus on that list, too.”

He cocked his head to one side. “You want to trump my three and a half points?”

“You did say the bus was my idea.”

“I did. But...”

“But what?”

“I think you have to give me double points for our ruse of a marriage.”

Meredith felt heat creep up her cheeks and she fought it. “I actually think
I
should get a point for that one.”

“How do you figure?”

The bus jerked around a corner, pushing her elbows into his knees. She tipped her face up and gave him her sweetest smile before righting herself.

“Because you were lucky enough to be fake-married to me, of course.”

Sam chuckled. “Meredith?”

“Yes?”

“I really like you.”

His statement let the heat win, and as she replied, a blush flooded her face. “I really like you, too.”

“A lot.”

“Me, too.”

“But that doesn’t mean I’m going to concede my two points.”

A mechanical voice announced that the bus was about to arrive at its terminus station. As it lurched to a stop, Sam stood and offered Meredith her hand. She stared at his outstretched fingers.

“I don’t think I’m taking that,” she said.

“No?”

She pushed herself to her feet. “Nope. Because if I did, you’d probably try to add it to your points.”

“You do realize it doesn’t matter. I’m at five, you’re at three, and as promised, I’m still ahead.”

“I don’t know if that really counts as winning.”

“More points equals losing?”

Meredith moved toward the doors. “Yes. I mean, the more points you have, the safer
I
am. So technically,
I’m
the one who’s winning.”

“You wish.”

“I know.”

Sam’s arms encircled her waist, and he pulled her back against her chest. “You’re wrong.”

“You think
you’re
winning?”

“I’m sure I am.” He put his mouth to her ear. “Because every point I get means you’re alive and safe and still with me, and that’s pretty much the only thing I need to be a winner.”

The doors slid open, and a blast of cool air hit Meredith. But she couldn’t feel it. Because the warmth in her heart blocked it out.

Chapter 14

M
eredith didn’t even bother to try and clear her head as they walked together toward Bowerville Station’s ticket office. There was no
point
in trying. Sam still had his arm around her waist and his scent filled her nostrils. His presence filled all of her senses.

He likes you. You like him. But...

Like?
It just didn’t seem like a big enough word. And the alternative—the idea of finding a better description—scared the hell out of her. It made her head spin.

So...embrace the spin. What have you got to lose? Well. Except your dignity. And your heart. And whatever exists between those two things.

She still leaned into him a little, testing it out. And her head definitely flew straight into the clouds. Which made her have to lean into him even more. He squeezed, and her
heart
squeezed, too. So, no.
Like
was definitely not a strong enough word.

“You okay?” Sam asked.

Meredith forced a laugh. “You do realize how many times you’ve asked me that in the last twenty-four hours, right?”

“Don’t worry. It’s purely for selfish reasons. If you say yes, you’re all right, I feel good. If you say no, you’re not all right, then I have an excuse to hold you even tighter. And I
still
feel good. Better even.”

“You’re doing that good-at-being-bad thing again, aren’t you?”

“Yep.”

Sam held the office door open, and a fresh-faced youth greeted them from behind the ticket counter.

“Can I help you?” she asked cheerfully.

“God, I hope so,” Sam replied. “I’m Derek Hall, and this is my wife.”

The conversation carried on, but Meredith barely heard it. Because as they walked through the doors, she’d spotted a map on the wall, and as she studied it, her memory sprang to life, bringing forward a childhood recollection she’d all but forgotten. Hope bloomed in her heart.

“Hamish,” she said.

Sam’s eyes found her. “Sweetheart?”

Meredith pointed at the map. “Turtle Island.”

She waited for him to examine it. Bowerville to Seattle. A connecting bus to the ferry. And from there... Turtle Island.

Sam frowned. “What about it?”

“It’s a vacation we went on once when we were kids. The last summer before my mom got sick and before my dad started drinking himself to death. We spent an entire summer there. Rented a place that eventually got torn down, but...Hamish, Sam.” She tried to keep her voice calm and couldn’t quite manage it.

He grabbed her hand.

“Excuse us,” he said to the now-puzzled ticket girl, and then he dragged Meredith back out the door. “Tell me what Hamish and Turtle Island have in common.”

“We found a dog that summer. A Scottish terrier. My sister desperately wanted to keep him, but my mom was allergic so we never even asked. Just fed him in secret. I felt guilty about it the whole summer, thinking that when we left him behind, there’d be no one to take care of him. Not Tamara, though. She said we were helping him while we could and that was all we could do.” Meredith knew she was babbling and struggled to rein it in. “She named that dog, Sam. The only Scottish name she could think of.”

“Hamish.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t make the connection right away.” She shook her head, annoyed with herself. “It went out of my mind completely until I saw Turtle Island there on the map. You know, Tamara stole a bag of food and got caught and cried so hard that the guy who owned the store ended up giving her the damned food. Oh, God. I wish I’d remembered all this before now.”

“All that matters is that you remembered now. Do you think she went there?”

“I don’t know.” In spite of the gravity of the situation, a little smile tipped up her lips. “If she did, I don’t think she really caught the bus.”

“What, then?”

“I still think she was creating a trail. And even if she didn’t go to the island, I think she wants
me
to go there.”

Sam nodded. “Should we buy tickets, or steal a car?”

“Sam!”

“You said I was good at this, remember?”

“Yeah, well. Maybe I should’ve said
too
good. And FYI, I usually have a one-felony-per-day limit.”

He shrugged. “Bus it is, then.”

But as they moved to go back into the office, a familiar navy sedan turned the corner and Meredith knew it wasn’t going to be that easy.

Her eyes darted from Sam’s face to the approaching car to the office behind them, then back to the car. The sedan’s tires squealed as it sped up, and he tugged on her hand.

They hurried past the little office building and cut across the loop, where half a dozen buses sat waiting. Together, they headed for the road, then jumped over a knee-high chain fence in the middle of the median and hit the other side. The move gave them the only advantage they would have, Meredith thought. Running in the opposite direction that the sedan traveled, with no way for the vehicle to cross. Its driver had no choice but to keep going and turn around at the station.

But they would still be on them in two minutes.

“It really isn’t right,” Meredith breathed. “One tiny step ahead. One small lead. Two giant steps backward.”

“Do you want to go back there and find out what happens if they
actually
catch up?”

“No.”

“So stop complaining and keep moving. Whiner.” His voice wasn’t quite breathless.

“Are you mocking me? Now?”

“I’m motivating you. Out of affection.”

In reply, Meredith increased the length of her strides until she overtook him. “Motivate this!”

“Hey!” he called out.

She ignored him, pushing as hard as she dared. As hard as she thought she could run and keep going. But the road in front of them seemed impossibly long. And it sloped up. Why hadn’t she noticed how isolated the station was? How the scenery was nothing more than a stretch of pavement framed by tan-colored dirt? Hadn’t there been buildings or trees or something on the way in?

“Nowhere to hide,” she muttered.

“One place,” Sam said from just behind her.

“Where’s that?”

“Here.”

One of his hands closed around her wrist and he jerked her off the road, stopping their crazy flight. Meredith shot a panicked look up the road. She couldn’t see the sedan on the horizon yet, but she knew it was coming any second.

“What are we doing?”

The question barely made it from Meredith’s mouth before he reached out, slipped his arms to her waist, and pulled them both sideways. As they flew from the side of the road, Sam twisted his body, protecting her from impact.

And he’d knocked her down just in time. As Meredith took a shaky breath, the roar of an approaching car engine carried through the air. It was fast. Loud. And showed no signs of stopping.

Thank God.

In seconds, the noise faded away, and the only sound left was the hard thump of her heart.

Meredith swallowed, realizing that while Sam
had
shielded her from the ground, the impact from his body was a whole different story. They were pressed together, reminding Meredith that so many parts of him were hard and rough and pleasant. And the narrowness of the dip in the ground allowed little wiggle room, emphasizing just how well they fit together.

And clearly, he felt it, too. He reached up a warm hand and brushed away a strand of hair from her face.

“Comfy?” His voice was throaty and teasing at the same time. Totally inappropriate for their precarious situation. But somehow calming, too.

“I don’t know. Is comfy what you were going for?” she replied.

He grinned. “I was going for a good hiding place. But I’ll take comfy, too.”

“I see. So. This is your idea of a good hiding place?”

He shook his head. “Mmm-hmm. If I were alone, this would be a good hiding place. Since you’re here...it’s what I think of as a
great
hiding place.”

“And suppose you
had
to throw me in, too?”

“Would you have climbed in quick enough if I asked you nicely?”

“I guess you’ll never know.”

“Don’t assume that. The day is young and we still have to escape from those friends of ours.”

The reminder brought Meredith back to the moment. “Speaking of which...how long should we wait?”

“Long enough that they’re gone, but not so long that they’ve got time to turn around.”

“Helpful.” She sighed. “Have I mentioned that I hate waiting?”

“Oh, I’m aware.”

“Are you calling me impatient?”

“Doggedly so.” Sam smiled. “Makes grand-theft auto seem a little less insane, though, doesn’t it? I mean, if we’d hot-wired that poor ticket agent’s car, we’d be flying down the highway right now instead of lying beside it.”

“You can hot-wire a car in under a minute?”

“Your dubious tone hurts my feelings.”

“I’m not dubious. I’m concerned about my own mental health.”

“Oh, really?”

“How could I not be? I’m lying on top of a man who burns down hotels and steals cars with remarkable efficiency.”

“Is your problem with the lying-on-top part or with the predisposition toward pillaging behaviors? Because I only burn and steal in the name of justice.”

Meredith laughed, wondering how he managed to make her enjoy even the most dismal of situations. And wondering even more if he knew the effect he had on her.

“Right,” she said. “Burning and stealing for justice. Mocking for affection.”

“Motivating.”

“You may have more issues than I initially believed.”

“Guess it’s a good thing that sister of yours is a marriage counselor. When we find her, she can sort us out.”

Meredith’s heart dipped a little at the mention of Tamara, and she forced a light reply. “I think she only takes on real married couples.”

“Damn. Does this mean you’re asking for a fake divorce?”

She stared down at him, and the intimacy of their position increased tenfold. The world slipped away as she absorbed the warmth of his gaze. And she knew that
he
knew her lightness wasn’t genuine. That he’d just put on his own teasing tone out of respect for her feelings. Because she mattered to him.

“No,” she said softly. “Definitely no fake divorces happening today.”

“Good. Because it just so happens that I’m not the divorcing type.” He stroked her cheek, then smiled. “Do you remember when I said I liked you?”

“An hour ago?”

“Mmm-hmm. And you said you liked me, too...” His fingers moved to her lips.

The attention made her mouth tingle. He tugged on her chin and ran his thumb over her teeth.
Good. So good. Since when are teeth so sexy?
Meredith wondered.

“So you do remember it?” Sam said teasingly as he brought his palms down to her throat, stroking gently.

“What?” She couldn’t shake the all-over shiver, and she had to really work to make herself speak articulately. “Oh. Yes. I remember. Why? Are you taking it back?”

He chuckled. “I’m not taking it back. In fact, I’d like to add to it. I want more.”

“More?”

“More than being trapped in a ditch,” Sam joked.

“Ditch?”

Okay,
Meredith decided.
Maybe I’m not all
that
articulate.

“More than liking,” Sam amended.

Hadn’t she just been thinking that? She couldn’t remember. Not with the way his oh-so-blue eyes were fixed on her. Not with the way her curves pushed into his hard planes. And her brain got even foggier when he slid his hand to the back of her neck and pulled her forward. Even less focused when he dragged his lips over each of her cheekbones, then up to her eyelids. And it stopped working altogether when he kissed every inch of her face before moving to her mouth. Then he kissed that, too. Attentively. Lovingly. Like they had all the time in the world instead of none at all.

And as he leaned back to gaze up at her, Meredith knew things had already progressed to so much more than liking. It
was
scary. Somehow—remarkably—right up there with the idea of what was happening to Tamara. Life-altering. But what had Sam said about fear?

Right. Face it. And move forward.

Could she do that? At the very least, she could try.

“Sam?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

I want more, too.

But what came out of her mouth was something else entirely. “I want you to promise me that if you think we’re at a place where we might not get Tamara back, you’ll tell me.”

Surprise registered on his face. “Tell you?”

Meredith nodded. “I don’t want to be living on false hope.”

Sam went silent for a moment. “And that’s your condition for more.”

“I hadn’t thought of it that way, but I guess it is. I don’t want to be hanging my hopes on something I can’t count on.”

She didn’t know if she was still talking about Tamara, or if she was talking about him directly. But it didn’t matter. He was already nodding.

“All right. I can do that.”

“I...” She couldn’t quite finish the embarrassing sentence she’d been about to utter.

“What?”

She closed her eyes. “It might sound stupid, but I need you to say it. To make the promise out loud.”

“Hey. Look at me.”

Meredith forced her eyes open again.

“I promise,” Sam said. “If we ever get to the point that I don’t think we can do this, I’ll tell you.”

An unreasonable amount of relief flooded Meredith’s body. But as she opened her mouth to express her gratitude, the click of a gun, followed by a wry chuckle, stopped her cold.

“Well, well,” said a rough voice from above. “My friend here was right. That flash we saw was something important. I guess I owe him an apology. Hello, kids.”

* * *

Complacent.

It was the first word that popped into Sam’s head as he realized they were trapped. And that it was his fault. He couldn’t move. Couldn’t reach for his gun. Not with someone else’s weapon trained on Meredith. And all because he’d been a little too damn complacent.

Their position blocked his view, but somehow Sam was certain the man above them was the redheaded thug. Which made him itch to lash out.