Work of Art ~ the Collection (91 page)

“What’s this, Captain Fantastic?” I ask, moving closer. There’s a loose drawing on the side of the box of a woman on a chaise lounge reading a book.

“Content description, so you know what goes where.”

“And this one goes where?

“Books go in your library, of course.”

“Library? This is New York, I’ll be living in a shoe box.”

“Yet another reason to stay with me. I’ve got a library, and my books would get along with yours quite nicely.”

He grins, and there’s something about the damn star glasses and his sweet, playful attitude that pushes me over the edge.

“You know what you’re doing to me, don’t you? This is the first time I’ve ever wanted to kiss someone resembling Elton John.”

“Well, I’m more than happy to be your first.” He winks as he pushes the star glasses higher on his nose. The following sweet kiss is more than inspiring.

“You’re my ‘Rocket Man,’” I tease, as I pull off the glasses and toss them on the couch.

“Or your ‘Madman Across the Water.’”

He kisses me and pulls me closer. When his fingers skim down my back, I realize he’s looked away.

“What?” I ask, following his gaze. He’s studying our reflection in the large mirror we took off the wall to wrap up.

“Look at how sexy you are,” he whispers, as he pushes my hair over my shoulder and kisses my exposed skin.

“No, no mirrors—I look like hell!” I exclaim. I close my eyes, but the mirror still sees, as evidenced by Max’s gasp of protest.

“Stop that. Ava, you’re beautiful.” He kisses my neck, and I slowly open my eyes just enough to see that he’s still watching me in the mirror.

“I see you peeking. Come on, open your eyes wider so you can really see.”

I give up and open my eyes wide. The visual of his hand now on my breast as his other hand slides over my ass to pull me closer is almost more than I can take.

It’s impossible to stop watching at this point. It’s the most erotic thing I’ve ever seen. Just the look of his hooded dark eyes as he watches is enough.

“Maxfield Caswell,” I whisper, shaking my head.

He gives me that lazy, sexy smile. “I like mirrors. Do you understand what I’m saying now? What you do to me? You’re beautiful
and
hot, Ava.”

I decide to stop fighting the flattery, so the adoration continues. His hands are under my shirt, and I think it’s time for a break from packing. “Yeah, I think I’m finally getting it, handsome. I’m hot—really hot,” I say with a playful grin.

“Yes, you are. And that’s only one of the reasons why I’ll put up with a year of you in New York and us having to circle our wagons since my fucking ex-girlfriend is back. ’cause one day you’ll return home and marry me. And when you do, I’ll have a big mirror facing our bed.”

“Really?” I whisper.

“Oh, yes,” he says darkly, as he kisses me. “And the things I will do to you, girl.” He kisses me again. “As you watch . . .”

“Yes?”

“I promise you, it’ll be worth the wait.”

Chapter Fifteen / The Flickering Light

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.

You’re on your own. And you know what you know.

You are the guy who’ll decide where to go.

Oh, The Places You’ll Go

~Dr. Seuss

“W
hat are you doing?” I turn to Max as he takes the ticket from the machine.

“Parking.”

“Yeah, I see that. You aren’t just dropping me off?”

“No, I want to walk you in. It will give me a few more minutes with you.”

“But you know how it is at the airport—you can’t go in past security.”

“I don’t care. I hate those rushed curbside hugs. I want a really good hug today.”

“Well, for all this effort, you’re getting a big kiss too.”

“See, never question my strategy, woman.”

“Okay, I’ll remember that.”

It’s funny how, in these moments, you don’t care that you’re surrounded by a buzzing swarm of anxious travelers and overzealous security guards. All you care about is your man pressed tightly against you and kissing you like you’re all that matters in the world.

He holds me extra long before we finally separate.

“Call me when you arrive, okay?”

“I will.” Feeling my usual preflight nerves, I check my watch. “I better get moving.” I smile and kiss him one last time before I turn to hand the TSA agent my driver’s license and boarding pass.

Rather than leaving, he watches me as I wait in the security line. After I load the plastic trays with my stuff and pass through, I turn. In the distance, I see he’s still standing there, looking positively lost. I step to the side and call him on my cell phone.

“Are you okay?” I ask gently.

“Are you?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Me neither.”

“Ugh, what are we going to be like when I really leave for the actual move?”

“You mean after Paris? ’Cause, isn’t this the real move?”

“Well, I’m pretending that it isn’t, so I don’t start sobbing. So what will that good-bye be like?”

He runs his fingers through his hair. “It’ll be like a scene in a movie where I’m yelling for you not to go and security is dragging me out the doors.”

Why can I picture this in my mind and totally believe it could happen?

“You’re killing me here, Max. Next time, maybe you should dump me on the curb.”

“Don’t say that. Look, I’ll be good. He walks backward as he holds the phone. See, I’m leaving. But one last thing before I do.”

“Yes?”

“I love you, Angel.”

“I love you too.”

That afternoon I’m standing in the hall of my temporary New York housing anxious to see the place I’ll be living in. Maybe seeing it will make everything feel more real.

“Ms. Jacobs, right?” The man in the gray sweater with a matching gray complexion looks down at his clipboard.

“Yes, Ava.”

“Right, I see here. Originally, you were moving in in a few weeks, but now it’s been pushed up to as soon as we finish painting and cleaning the carpets.”

“Yes, and I appreciate you showing it to me early. I just arrived, and my hotel’s a few blocks away. I want to see the space to figure out what I still need.”

“No problem.”

He pulls out a large ring of keys, lifts them up to the designer lights, and examines each one as I wait patiently.

“If you don’t mind my asking, where’re you from?”

“L.A.”

He chuckles. “People from L.A. have the hardest time. They’re used to a lot more living space. But, still, this is pretty good, and it’s in a great neighborhood. Even though this is temporary housing, some people end up staying here when they see what’s available out there.”

He finally finds the key and pushes open the door.

He isn’t kidding about the size of the space. I have spatial shock. Seriously. My bedroom at home is larger than this whole apartment, and don’t get me started comparing this to Max’s house. I mean, French doors looking out over the Pacific Ocean? This place has narrow windows with a view of the office building across the street where I watch the busy worker bees doing their tasks. It’s similar to what I’ve experienced in almost every New York hotel room I’ve stayed in, but it feels so much different knowing this will be my new home, even if it’s temporary.

“So, this is your living room,” he says grandly, as he waves at a sleek love seat and armchair with a contemporary cherry wood coffee table in front of it.

The carpets are high-end Berber wool in a warm taupe. A flat screen T.V. is perched on a high-tech media cart. There’s a framed black and white print of the Statue of Liberty at sunset above the couch, perhaps to remind me where I am, in case I forget.

“Your kitchen is over here.” Despite the fancy granite counter and stainless details, the kitchen looks like the galley on an airplane. There’s a microwave and coffeemaker with a tiny built-in refrigerator below. Even the sink is miniature. He opens up a cupboard to show a small collection of white plates, bowls, and coffee mugs.

“No stove?”

“No, just the burners for heating up soup or boiling water; most people do take out.”

“The bedroom is back here.” The double bed fills the room. When Max visits, I don’t think he’ll fit on this mattress. The only other furniture is a tall narrow dresser and a bedside table with a lamp. The bedspread is a contemporary design in various shades of beige. I hate beige; something about it makes me want to scream. I find consolation in the idea that at least I can replace the bedspread.

Gray guy watches me as I peek inside the small closet and marble-walled compact bathroom.

“If I stay longer, can I hang art on the walls?”

“We would prefer you didn’t. We’d have to patch and repaint, and then charge you a crazy amount of money.”

“I see.”

“The cleaning service comes once a week. You can have them more often for an additional fee.”

I have to admit, the place feels very clean, but that adds to the sterile feeling.

We walk back into the “living room,” and he slaps the top of a little table with a matching chair. “You can eat here or use it as a desk. The Internet hook up is here, and comes with the package, although most people use the wireless.” On top of the table is a notebook that he lifts and fans through. “Here’s a reference notebook we’ve put together about all the places you’ll want to know about in the area—dry cleaners, best bagels, drug store, gym, etc. There are takeout menus and maps of nearby neighborhoods. Everyone picks up and delivers.”

“Thanks, that’ll be helpful.”

“Most deliver really late, in case you work long hours.”

“How’d you know?”

“That’s pretty common around here.” He shrugs. Gray Guy has seen it all. “Well, that’s about it. Okay, ready to go?”

My heart thumps and I try to figure out what’s freaking me out the most—the overabundance of beige, the framed faux artwork where my Max Angel painting should hang, or is it that I’ve never felt more alone and terrified in my life?

“Actually, would you mind if I took a moment longer to myself?”

He gives me a quizzical look, but nods. “I guess that’s okay. The door will lock behind you, so just make sure you close it tightly.”

When Gray Guy leaves, I sit on the edge of the couch and watch the office workers sit at their computers while the tears stream down my face. The emotions hit me in large waves until I’m sobbing.

What am I doing here? What have I gotten myself into?

After getting enough toilet paper off the roll to gather my tears, I fish out my cell phone and call Jess. The sound of her voice immediately grounds me.

“Hey, girl! How’s New York?”

“Jess,” I sigh and take a deep breath. It catches in my throat.

“Oh no. What happened, Ava?”

“Nothing happened really; it’s just that I’m sitting in the bleakest little shoebox that will soon be my temporary housing. And, Jess?”

“Go on.”

“I’m not sure I can do this.”

“Oh, I see. The hard part is finally hitting you. You’re in this empty plain shoebox, wondering why you left your beautiful life for this leap in the dark.”

“Yes, yes.” I’m relieved she understands.

“But, baby, the bright beautiful light hasn’t hit you yet. Yes, you’re going to have some dark moments like this, when you’re lonely or insecure or exhausted or angry. But you have to remember that this is the path to the extraordinary. Your journey’s just begun, so you can’t give up yet.”

“You make it sound like a magical journey.”

“Well, it fucking is! Do I really need to convince you? Look, we just need to find you a better place to live—fast. If you don’t call some of the friends whose numbers I gave you, I’ll call them and have them chase you down and take you out. You’ve got to push through this, Ava.”

“Well, I guess it’s too late to get out of it anyway. The contracts are signed.”

“Yes, but you’ve got to set the shoebox aside, and remind yourself why you’re there. You do want to do this show and work with all of these artists. You’re going to bring their lives and work to the public. How fucking cool is that?”

“You’re the best friend ever, Jess,” I say as my spirits lift. “It was just so hard saying good-bye to Max this morning. He looked so lost. Can you do me a favor and check on him later?”

“Sure. Have you called him yet?”

“Right after I arrived. He was painting, but he took the call right away. He’d been waiting to hear from me.”

“You know, Ava, you need to remember that although he may be in agony over the temporary separation, he’s really proud of you. I wish you could’ve heard him explain the job to Laura. He’s your biggest fan.”