Wonderland (Intergalactic Fairy Tales Book 1) (2 page)

The boys had started to pay more attention to Alice this year in school. She found it incredibly annoying. A well placed punch in Tommy’s mouth had taken care of that. Since that incident, the boys had little interest in Alice, and Anna had become completely insufferable under their added attention.

Dinah mewed her displeasure at all the noise. Alice scooped her up in her arms and flopped down heavily on the bed to make her displeasure known to her parents. “Sorry about that Dinah. You’ll get your plunder next time.”

The cat nuzzled her chin and licked her once with her rough tongue. Alice jerked her head back. “Augh. You know I hate that, Dinah.”

Dinah looked up at her innocently and Alice dissolved into giggles. “And that’s exactly why you did it, you little monster. You’d make a perfect first mate and I’ll definitely take you when I get my ship.”

The cat simply stared at her with her luminescent yellow eyes. Alice took that as a solemn vow to join her, despite the fact that she would likely get her paws wet and she hated that.

Alice lay back on her bed. Dinah curled up beside her and immediately went to sleep. “That’s right girl, rest up. Big day of pirating ahead tomorrow. Who cares what our parents say.”

Alice looked over her room, her eyes growing heavy. She stared longingly at the model ships and ocean paintings on her wall. She had read her first pirate adventure when she was eight years old. Throughout the intervening years, her room had gradually transformed from a princess’ palace to a scoundrel’s hideout. Her parents had encouraged her at that age, confident she would outgrow the phase like she had with her princess obsession. Her father was still a soft touch, buying her the blunted sword that hung above her bed just a few weeks ago, but her mother had long since stopped encouraging her.

She looked down at her blue dress and sighed. She knew she should get up and change into pajamas, but she suddenly couldn’t find the strength. The dress was her favorite and it always made her happy when she wore it, so her mother had tried to use it as a way to discourage her from being a pirate.

“Pirates don’t wear dresses,” she’d said. “They have to wear ugly brown pants that get torn and dirty.”

“Pirates don’t follow any rules, Mother,” Alice had said, as if she were explaining to a child. “That’s the glory of being a pirate, you can do whatever you want. And if I want to wear a dress, then I can do as I please.”

Her mother hadn’t liked that response very much, but she didn’t have a good argument to counter it. So, Alice went on wearing her dresses and practicing her nautical cursing, while daydreaming about what her ship would be like, despite the fact that there really wasn’t much trade on the ocean these days. The ocean held such mystery. Planes and high-tech machines like matter transporters had replaced ships when it came to cargo. She’d read about piracy in space, where things still had to travel on ships, but spaceships these days were mostly used for the Colarian war.

Once she stopped focusing on her room and began to imagine the life of a space pirate, it wasn’t long before she drifted off to sleep.

CHAPTER TWO

Alice woke slowly, her eyes barely able to focus in the gloom. Dinah still lay curled up beside her. The only light to be had in her room was from the moon shining in through her bedroom window. She got up and walked over to peer outside into the field behind her house, as she often did when she woke from bad dreams. She couldn’t recall her dreams this time, but going back to sleep felt impossible. Thoughts of her life spent in boredom as an accountant, handling other people’s stacks of plundered money instead of getting her own, haunted her.

She shook her head to clear her thoughts and focused on the nighttime activities in the field. There were small animals scurrying about under the watchful eye of an owl that occasionally took flight and swooshed down in an attempt to snatch up a meal. As most things did, it reminded her of the pirate life and made her heart ache.

Then, without warning, something white and massive swooped down from the sky. The owl screeched and flew away, wanting nothing to do with the new arrival. It was so far away that Alice had a hard time guessing its size. It prowled along the edge of the forest on the opposite side of the field, dancing in and out of the shadows. It didn’t move like any bird she’d ever seen before, gliding without the need to pump its wings, if it had them. When it disappeared behind a stand of trees, Alice made her decision. She was going to follow it.

She held her breath and listened. Her parents were laughing downstairs. There was nothing keeping her in her room other than a window that opened to an easily climbable tree. Fear gripped her heart. She’d never been out in the woods at night by herself.

Dinah looked up at her and yawned. “Mreoooow?”

“Yeah, what am I waiting for?” asked Alice. “This is all just a dream anyway. There aren’t any creatures like what I just saw, so I might as well go check it out.”

Dinah laid her head back down and closed her eyes, satisfied that she’d done her job.

Alice slid open the window and eyed the closest branch. The full moon lit it well and she’d climbed on it so often that it may as well have been a paved road to the ground. Normally she wouldn’t dream of so openly defying her parents, but tonight she’d had enough. Pirates did as they wished and made no apologies. She swung a leg over the sill and placed it carefully on the tree branch.

Something nagged at the back of her mind, something she was forgetting. Scanning her room, her eyes locked on the blunted sword above her bed, illuminated in a stray beam of moonlight. One couldn’t have a proper pirate adventure without a sword. Even if it didn’t have a sharp edge, she could still do some serious harm with it.

Moments later Alice was down the tree and running across the open field, her sword tucked into a white sash she’d belted around her waist. It bounced reassuringly at her side as she barreled after the large creature as fast as her feet would carry her. The moonlight gave her plenty of light to run by, even if she hadn’t known the field like the back of her hand. A heady mix of elation tinged with fear suffused her limbs, urging her forward.

As quickly as the beast had been traveling, Alice expected to have to run for quite a lot longer once she reached the forest. Instead, it sat, or rather hovered, in the same spot she saw it disappear. She had to pull up short to avoid running into it.

The creature was the strangest thing she’d ever seen. While it was obviously alive, since it was clearly looking at her with two large round eyes, it also very much resembled a ship. A good sized white ship, with what appeared to be floppy ears. On the whole, it looked like a spaceship had mated with an enormous white rabbit and this creature was its offspring.

“Hello,” said Alice, unsure of what else to say.

The creature didn’t seem to have a mouth, but that didn’t keep it from responding, if rather rudely. “You’re trampling my mushrooms.”

“Oh,” said Alice, looking down at her feet and finding that she was indeed standing on a few of the dozens of mushrooms spread around her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t notice them.”

“No matter, they work just as well all broken up,” said the creature. “Stand aside so I can collect them.”

“No,” said Alice, scowling up at the creature. “This field belongs to my parents, so these mushrooms belong to them as well. You’re trespassing and stealing.”

“Oh, dear heavens, how shall I ever live with myself?” retorted the creature and then rolled its eyes. It was quite an impressive feat, considering its eyes were almost twice her height.

“And now you’re mocking me,” said Alice, stomping a couple more mushrooms in spite.

“I don’t have time for this,” said the creature. “I’m going to be late. Absolem haggles for so long that I’m probably already going to be missed.”

“Well, if perhaps you were a bit nicer, I might consider letting you have the mushrooms,” said Alice.

“And if I try to take them without being nice?”

Alice drew her sword from her sash and pointed it at the creature’s massive eye. Strangely there wasn’t as much of a reflection as she expected to see. There was a large open space behind the glass of its eye. “Then you shall taste my blade,” said Alice as dramatically as she could.

“That blade is clearly blunted,” scoffed the creature. “Besides, you’re just a tiny little girl and I’m—oh bugger this, I don’t have the time.”

“What are you, anyway?” asked Alice, lowering her sword, not because it was too heavy to hold up any longer, because she decided she liked this strange and ornery creature. Her aching arm was relieved anyway.

“I’m late, that’s what I am. The queen will have my head if I’m not back soon,” muttered the ship-creature. “I’ve got to get my mushrooms and go.”

Suddenly dozens of tiny tendrils sprouted from either side of the creature’s head and began to pluck the mushrooms and pull them back. Alice shrunk from the strange display. Each of the light pink tendrils was roughly the width of a fingertip. They wrapped carefully around the stems of the mushrooms like pink snakes. Then they constricted and pinched them off and took them away toward the ship-creature’s neck. Alice followed them and found they were being pulled inside an open hatch on either side. With them open she could see entirely through the bizarre creature. If she hadn’t been talking to it, she would have assumed it was some sort of vehicle. A hovercraft, since it clearly floated about a half meter off the ground.

The mushrooms were stored in compartments just inside the creature, toward its rear. They opened very much like a normal drawer or cabinet would, sliding or pulling out. Everything inside was the same light pink as the tendrils. A soft glow emanated from recesses in the ceiling, giving her a decent view down the length of the creature’s insides. “Wow,” commented Alice, unable to find a better word.

“Stay away from there,” said the creature, pausing in its mushroom collection.

“You surely are an amazing beast,” said Alice, reaching out to touch its white exterior. It was as hard as steel, but warm to the touch.

“Hmph,” it said in response, and went back to its mushroom collection.

Alice tucked her sword back inside her sash, carefully raised her foot, and stepped up on the edge of the creature’s open hatch. The floor was slightly spongy in texture, but plenty solid enough for walking on. Before she could convince herself it was a bad idea, Alice walked toward the rear of the craft, which it clearly was now that she could see inside it. She brushed past the tendrils going about their job of stuffing mushrooms into cabinets and drawers and found there were large crates and bags stacked inside, bursting with other goods. “What is all this stuff for?” asked Alice.

“None of your business,” replied the creature. Its tendrils deposited their mushrooms and then slowly retreated into tiny holes in the ceiling and walls. Flaps closed over them like eyelids. “Now get out of there, I have business that I’m late for. Out with you.”

“And if I don’t?” asked Alice, climbing a ladder made of the same white metal material as the creature’s hull.

“Well, then I shall be forced to pull you out and drop you on your ear.”

“You’ll have to catch me first,” called Alice, hurrying quickly up the ladder and further toward the rear of the ship. The tendrils were back out and floating toward her. One tickled her side and she let out a giggle. It wasn’t very pirate-like, but she figured it was her intentions that truly mattered, and she intended to take this ship.

“Hey now,” called the creature. “That’s not fair, I can’t reach back that far, and—oh, stop that, it tickles!”

The tendrils danced and waved in front of Alice’s face, obviously stretched to their limits. She poked at them playfully, eliciting further laughter from the ship. “No, I don’t think I’m going to leave. I think I shall make you my ship,” replied Alice.

“I can’t be your ship,” replied the creature, suddenly sounding sulky.

“Well, you don’t seem to be able to stop me from staying aboard, so I think that makes you mine,” said Alice.

“Oh, bugger this, I don’t have time to deal with you. If you continue to tickle me, know that I can jettison you into space any time that I please,” grumped the ship.

“Space?” asked Alice, a bit of trepidation obvious in her voice’s slight quaver.

“Of course, silly girl,” said the creature, closing its side hatches, sealing Alice inside. “I can’t very well be a spaceship if I never go into space, can I?”

“I guess not,” said Alice, wondering if it was wise to go into space while inside the belly of a living creature. Especially one that seemed to be cross with her. She comforted herself with the fact that this whole thing was quite impossible and that she had to be dreaming, so nothing could hurt her.

“Hold onto something, little girl,” said the creature, and then lurched upward with astounding speed. “Breaking atmosphere can be a little rough on those that have never done it before.”

“Who’s to say that I’ve never done it before?” said Alice, grabbing onto the rail that lined the upper walkway. Her stomach dropped into her feet and then threatened to jump up and out of her mouth. When she was confident that she wouldn’t empty the contents of her stomach, she said, “And if we’re going to be traveling together, you should call me by my name.”

The creature didn’t respond. “It’s Alice,” she said finally.