Authors: Joseph McElroy
Oh the ancient apartment houses, continued Mayn, a day later face to face, they spread south from Utah but in Jones’s time the Anasazi cliff houses, not to be confused with the Pueblo co-ops, had long fallen vacant but for a hermit occupying one unit six months of the year in northern New Mexico; it was a multi-year summer plan he had, I mean a hermit from the City of the East, remarkable man whether real or made-up. Unusual, no doubt, but your hermit needs a break once in a while too, though not necessarily in terms of seeing a whole lot of people (You mean, said Larry, not necessarily a vacation from
himself?
—Yeah, that’s it exactly).
But Larry’s not sure if Mayn said this line of hermits included this Hermit-Inventor of New York. But could
Lar
have made it up? lately he thinks of invaders in his bloodstream (maybe they’re good) but then they aren’t the We his mother Sue’s always speaking in—(We feel that only through money can we achieve power) but (God, maybe) his
own
We, but does that make him wacko or a vehicle for these bloodstream visitors to (what? "get
real,"
as his own mother puts it, even when she tells him he lives in his head and ought to—) feel, not think. Yet this hermit is into quite threatening meteorological thinking and it has made Jim Mayn reflect upon a certain Hermit ®f New York who befriended Jim’s own grandmother not quite a century ago when she came down through canyonland a timeless Victorian girl-explorer with a box camera and on a horse brimful of locoweed at one point so it leaked (and beamed and radiated into her legs and eyes) full filtered through the bliss of her temporarily insane horse and, as a consequence, Jim told Larry one evening meeting at a newsstand beside the cafeteria where half a dozen cabs were pulled up, she could see just what she wanted though with the help of a fine young Indian who had given her her skin-and-dyed-wool saddle and her horse and some high-class guided companionship to boot (though Jim deep down felt this Navajo princeling had come to a bad end because of her eventually)—he was sort of a brother and perhaps husband-at-first-sight and Jim wished he had asked his grandmother more about him though he had gotten the impression that the Hermit of New York had kept an eye on her: so Lar’, who’s thinking Why’s this old guy (well, not
that
old) kidding like this in the middle of well what else? until Lar’ feels, yes
feels,
that this young woman of the last century, Jim’s grandmother or person beyond her, could see in the high-up and far-targeted reflection of the cliff-vacationing hermit (whom she couldn’t see except for his eyes like one eye, one platinum ingot) someone else entirely, astride this Indian pony (God, thought Larry, looking into the window of a furniture store all alone the following morning on the way to the subway to go to college, this stuff is driving me loco and all I get from Jim Mayn is this sense that he’s a down-to-earth not very intellectual regular guy, divorced, yes, he did speak of that as if we’re—what?—equals? like Grace said, speak to everyone as an equal)—till Larry’s telling this ancient story himself, Guess whose reflection the visiting Princess made out in the pin-glint of platinum light from the hundred-foot-high tier of cliff caves of that centuries-old multiple dwelling of the departed people who had once had a sterling culture of pots and cloth, and larders stapled with corn that some said had been transplanted hundreds and even thousands of miles from the original southeastern soils long gone of this continent the Princess was discovering, plus dry-country native seeds help save Africa from famine, a woman friend of Mayn’s is seriously thinking of giving up her career as a journalist to work on this—but guess whose
reflection
the Princess made
out.
Oh, why it was your grandmother’s obviously, said Lar\
How did you know? called Mayn, laughing elevator door closed. It just came to me, said Larry, who saw Jim for an instant as a family man coming home, though Lar’ knew there’s nobody upstairs. (Or was there?)
Platinum don’t come in ingots, is that what you’re thinking?
Somewhere through these days and mostly phone talks after the two had met when Lar’ had by chance heard Mayn discussing basketball in the lobby with the doorman in Spanish and had joined in, Larry became attached to Mayn, maybe because he had been places and was cool. Until Mayn was in Larry’s head often, like opinions, and Larry, who did not ask Mayn about himself, saw the fact, one night, hearing his father come in, and could not imagine why Mayn’s college-age son didn’t want to be in touch with Mayn, because while Jim did not think at all the same way as Grace Kimball, he was funny, like her, and heard what you said, though she maybe made
up
what she said (though out of
what?),
did she really think her kidneys spoke to her brain and generated dreams?, but the man whom one of the women in her workshop reported had never dreamed must exist, though when Lar’ was going to raise the question of whether it was possible not to dream, Grace told how the woman was ready to be in love with that undreaming man sight unseen, which was a perfect example of love addiction. This relationship with Mayn was easier, though Larry woke up in the middle of one night, hearing his father come in, and remembering soft joking in the next room long ago between his father and his mother—and now recalled Jim Mayn just now saying in this dream Lar’ had been having, "Get out of there, Larry," Larry driving through a three-sided bowl of rocky mountains, desert deserted for days of a poor man’s travel, "Forget it all, Larry, forget the family and try thinking something new," whereupon Larry asked something, and Mayn said, "Never dream": until Larry at once grasps the light where some modulus of the dream has vanished but leastways it’s light and has come to rest and is what’s between the two men, and Larry knows he’s Mayn in the dream, so maybe dreaming
for
his friend—has become this other person while simultaneously being, well, almost-Larry, but he is certainly
not
the women who arrived as the dream was curving away around a tree trunk or down the Earth just barely held by gravity to the surface: they were his mother and a band of others like her: he was in his clothes on the bed, but his father wasn’t about to open the door, and dreams thank God were garbage, all these angels and his mother were pleading with him, "Let’s be real, let’s be human," as if it’s up to him, when it’s no more up to him in some dream than when his mother said those very words out loud in the next room to her friend Evelyn so Larry heard. At least not talking about him. Or telling him he thought too much, which was a hard one to answer, he was working on it.
Yet he was talking to Jim Mayn days afterward only to know that on the night of that garbage dream he had had a theory as clear as if he could say it: it was a reincarnation theory that was true this time but must find itself in Larry before it could be clear.
Larry wanted to ask Mayn a direct question about escorting Amy to the opera when Mayn said he don’ like opera.
All very poor out there, says Lar’ from a phone booth and digs for a nickel, comes up with a quarter, all he’s got, then remembers Mayn called him back from Mayn’s home, did Lar’ pick up a signal?—responding anyway to Mayn’s claim that certain Indians of the Southwest come all the way home hundreds of miles from boarding school for the weekend and nobody knows how they make the trip, they disappear into it and materialize hundreds of miles later.
Mayn had a relative who went out there before the turn of the century and stayed almost too long and when she came back an Indian she was mixed up with followed her clear across the continent.
There’s hardly anything to fill this break between the hard facts he speaks of (such as water, and the litigation over it against heavyweight Anglo lawyers talking water so that Indian irrigation plans, their own and those of others
for
them, go only partway, everlastingly partway, poverty and water)—this break between the hard facts and such allusions to that relative often a grandmother but then allusions to lore that feels true like dug-up-bits, including a Princess from elsewhere who had a protector in a hermit who sat up in high tiers of wind-hollowed niches (also believed to have been the result of the actual rock’s
thought)
and she would catch him far far away and high above her watching her and recognize in his platinum hermit-eye the grandmother Mayn recalled so fondly.
"I mean," Mayn went on, "you can make hunger dramatic, it’s got good bone definition, cheek, chin, ribs, for those who don’t share it you know, and so when the Princess turned into her reflection at a later time," but as Larry put it together still later, the grandmother must have been really someone, whoever the Princess was, because she criticized her Navajo "protector" and his people, who weren’t too well off themselves, for having driven the Anasazi people out six hundred years before (though it may have been that the river had cut so deep down into the earth that the irrigation ditches were amputated high and dry like reverse waterfalls that can’t draw water up any more).
Larry later felt Mayn had been entertaining him.
Apartment tiers as vacant as the sunlight: when she looked again, she thought she saw one hundred, two hundred scrawny physiognomies with blanketed shoulders, blanket-hooded heads, looking out of that cliff dwelling answering like tidal creatures coming out of the shadows that lined the fingers of sun bent and crooked because of the openings.
She looked again and saw but
one
hundred. But arriving at the ceremonial sing where the Prince’s people tried to find a way into the Prince’s mother’s trouble through a hole in her forehead plain as could be but full up with demons that left little extra space but didn’t leak, the East Far Eastern Princess asked how the two hundred had become one hundred—those impoverished, derelict Indians back in the "apartment house," did they have a way of making people and things fewer, like the one used in her father’s East Far Eastern land of Manchoor? There, far away, her father had taught her to ride on the worst giant hill-sheep of the Manchoor Mountains he owned, when he was not gathering information about other countries. She would never ride like a
Navajo
sheepherd no matter how long her fact-gathering visit. Contemplating the two hundred or the one hundred, she asked herself, What of excrement? But Rivertalk, who was the Navajo Prince’s second mother, was surprised, for didn’t this fluctuation of numbers just happen? It was either death, a natural result of living among the unseen presences; or it was that when you weren’t looking, half the people went back into their cliff apartments; or it was that two became one just as one became two in many ways, hadn’t the Princess seen
one
hundred before she saw
two?
Larry was happier for having spoken to Mayn—and catching the eye of a tall blonde girl in a locoweed-purple outfit passing, so she leaned back and stopped, friendly, reminded by someone in the mid-City using the booth that it was there and she needed to put in a phone call. Larry, by now possessed not only by interest in the dual histories of this man who wrote news but didn’t believe in anything you’d be ready to call history, but also by the need to speak what he had called Mayn in the first place to say but had not been able to, along these last mutual minutes curving by swiftest increment away from Lar’s prepared question to nonetheless keep faith with the undeniably parallel tracks either side which happy parallels sloping off into the sunset over the Jersey cliffs he is moved in his abstracted heart to see behind these darker people going to the subway outside his booth, finds all turned now into the face of the blonde who’s waiting.
There’s someone waiting for this phone, and all I wanted to know, though thanks I
would
like to go to the game, is—
Listen, Larry, hang in there, you’re a good playground talker yourself, the formulas (was that economics or physics?) I probably couldn’t keep up with you, though that’s fun sometimes, but when you said you’re a good playground talker backpedaling one-on-two waiting to make your move—
I said that? asks Larry, as the blonde looks at her knuckles. He had thought he had only
thought
it.
Well, all I called about—oh gee I got to get off the line, there’s someone waiting—was, well obviously Amy is into work that connects with your work, right?, and it isn’t the right-brain video research for the handicapped,
I
know
that,
and she phoned me once to ask for your number which didn’t make any sense; so is she in some kind of trouble?
In Mayn’s mind, Larry knows, come answers unspoken to Larry’s unspoken question Was there anything between him and Amy? Mayn is saying "We" about when they are going to meet for the game, and Larry is saying "We" about a couple of events scheduled between his father and him, like going out to dinner tonight and maybe going to swim at a pool they have a family membership at and they haven’t gone in a while. Mayn has said, Well, Amy’s a real pretty girl. But he has balked, Lar’ knows, at the bottom-line negative, adding, You say you got a lady waiting there? Jim’s saying, Between us, that Chilean exile I mentioned to you who’s . . . modestly shrouded in the folds and folders of the foundation Amy works for as a research assistant, Larry understands, and that Jim prefers not to say more—so that, realizing that Mayn don’ wanna reassure him that there’s nothing of a sexual nature between him and Amy, nor ask him to keep under his hat these mentions of the Chilean exile-economist, Larry separates the perhaps nothing political implications of his present rush and concludes that, O.K., maybe he is being used by some higher power (as Grace Kimball said once, using the Alcoholics Anonymous formula) and if the higher power someway
equals
his new sharing with Jim (or anyone else maybe), then try to flow along the curve of this whatever it is, because it is more than relationship softly resounding words like "We" through Lar’—it’s another type of being using him toward—what?