Woman to Woman (23 page)

“It was a bit tough at first, but the girls are so nice, I know it’ll work out fine That’s great said Fiona in relieved tones.

“You need something to keep your mind off Michael. I was so worried about you last week, you know.”

“I do feel a lot better now Aisling admitted.

“Maybe it’s just coping with all the practical things, feeding the boys, paying the bills, that kind of thing. I haven’t let myself descend into total misery. And work will certainly help she said with a laugh.

“I didn’t have much time to think about Michael today!

Which is all thanks to you and Pat for getting me this job.

You’ve both been wonderful “What are friends for?” demanded Fiona.

“Not all friends are as good as you Aisling pointed out.

“I’ve had a few calls from friends of ours and they just don’t know ‘ what to say. Poor Angela Dunn just stuttered and stammered?; and finally said she’d ring me in a few months, like I was going into mourning! Nobody from Michael’s office has rung, although I suppose it

must be awkward for them. “She didn’t say that this had hurt her deeply. All she’d wanted was a friendly voice on the phone, telling her that even though she and Michael weren’t together, the friends they had known for the past ten years were still there.

Breakups certainly made you realise the value of true friends, like Fiona and Jo.

“Mum has been great,” Aisling added.

“She arrived on Tuesday with a freezer full of pies and stews for us. I said Michael had left, he hadn’t died! Luckily, she saw the funny side of it.”

“Ash! You’re dreadful!” laughed Fiona.

“What must your poor mother have thought? You’re dreadful for joking about serious things. Anyway, your mum’s generation aren’t used to the idea of people splitting up and the poor woman must be in shock.”

“Oh, Mum knows my sense of humour by now. I think living with dad has knocked her own sense of humour out of her, though. He wouldn’t recognise a joke if it bit him on the bum. Mum put him on the phone the other night and it was like talking to the sideboard. He was on the verge of doing his “I’d hoped for more from you, Aisling” routine but he stopped. I think Mum must have grabbed the phone off him.”

“Don’t mind him,” Fiona said indignantly.

“You’ve done so well with your life. What did he want, Einstein for a daughter?”

“Someone smarter than Einstein, I think Aisling said drily.

“Luckily Sorcha’s achievements have made up for the shame of me being a mere housewife. I swear that his chest swells when he tells people she’s working in a bank in London. Mind you she added, ‘if Sorcha lived here, he wouldn’t be so delighted with her because they fight like cats and dogs.

Distance is a wonderful thing.”

“Has she heard?” Fiona inquired.

“She rang on Saturday and told me I was a fool to have! stayed at home cleaning the toilet. She has a great way with!

“words, that one. I did point out that there was more to my life than

sticking my head under the rim to see what germs were lurking, but I stopped myself. It was easier to say nothing.”

“Wait until she has a family and a home,” said Fiona sounding vexed.

“She’ll find out it isn’t so easy to be mother and chief bottle-washer after all.”

“Sorcha isn’t going to have any children, my dear,” pointed out

“She wants to have her tubes tied.”

“Around her neck, I hope,” muttered the other woman.

“She has that effect on me too, Fee. She completely ruined my ideas of what a little sister was supposed to be like. Thank God Nicola came along or I’d have always thought that little sisters were like some sort of biblical curse. You know, “And the Lord said, a little sister will be born, to ravage your bedroom, destroy your toys and keep you in eternal trouble until you leave home.” “Was she really that bad?”

“Worse. And talking of kids, thanks for picking up the boys this afternoon, although Phillip has been like a briar since he came home.”

“He was a bit moody,” Fiona agreed.

“I thought he’d cheer up when he saw you “No chance!” said Aisling.

“I think I’ve just crossed the line from Good Stay at Home Mummy to Bad Working Mummy.

You should have seen the look on his face when he got beans, mash and fish fingers for dinner!”

“You’ve ruined all three of them with your gourmet cooking,” started Fiona, stopping abruptly when she realised what she’d said.

“Sorry.”

“You’re right,” Aisling replied matterof-factly.

“I did spoil them, Michael particularly. Homemade bread for breakfast, smoked salmon pate at the weekends because he loved it, chicken en croute or fresh pasta for his dinner and he never had to so much as wash up a cup or throw a towel in the laundry basket. I wonder is he allowed to get away with that type of behaviour with her! I don’t think career women have much time for very old-fashioned men,”

she added sarcastically. Lying on her own in their big double bed later, she thought about what Fiona had said. She was right. Aisling had totally spoiled the three men in her life. She’d become obsessed with being the best housewife possible.

The house could have won prizes for cleanliness, her interior decoration was the same. She’d prided herself on her cooking, as though being a wizard with a food processor made up for her lack of abilities outside the home. And somewhere along the way, Aisling Moran had disappeared. That’s what Michael had said. Had he been right?

He’d married her because he loved her, her vitality and her sense of humour. When she’d slowly lost her self-assurance, her belief in herself, she’d panicked. And thought that becoming the perfect homemaker was the answer. Only it hadn’t been.

Michael had wanted Aisling, the woman he married. But she’d turned into Super Housewife, handy in the kitchen, but out of water anywhere else. Would a job have changed all that, she asked herself? A day in Richardson, Reid and Finucane had certainly given her lots to talk about.

She’d have enjoyed telling Michael about the different characters in the office and with his support behind her she probably wouldn’t have been so uncomfortable in Leo Murphy’s presence. But if Michael had still been with her, Leo would never have been so lecherous, she was sure of that.

Being separated suddenly made her fair game for the likes of Leo. How the hell was she going to face him on her own?

Aisling sat up in bed and switched on her bedside light. It was ten past twelve, she had to be up in six and three-quarter hours and she didn’t feel even vaguely like sleeping.

She plumped up her two pale yellow pillows behind her, then suddenly reached over and grabbed Michael’s. For the past week, she’d made the bed every morning as if he was coming home that night, arranged his pillows just the way he liked them. She still slept on her side of the bed.

Why the hell was she doing that, she asked herself crossly?

He wasn’t coming back. In fact, even if he wanted to, he wasn’t coming back. So there! He could stuff his pillows! She laughed at her own joke. Now, what to read? Something fluffy and romantic or something wonderfully scary?

Leaning down to her bedside table, Aisling found the book she wanted. It was funny how she’d got out of the habit of reading when she couldn’t sleep at night, she thought.

Michael always slept soundly and solidly, seven or eight hours no matter what. She’d never been so lucky but had rarely turned on her light to read at night in case it woke him. Not any more. She could read until dawn, steal all the duvet and all the pillows, and paint the entire bedroom whorehouse pink if she felt like it! So what if it was after twelve, she’d go to bed early tomorrow night. Satisfied with herself, Aisling settled back against her comfortable back rest. Perfect.

Tuesday was a good day. Elizabeth turned out to be a funny and warm woman in her early thirties who was delighted to be pregnant after four years of trying for a baby. Under her relaxed and expert tutelage, Aisling quickly learned how to use the word processor once she’d admitted that she had never used one before.

“I can’t believe it’s so easy Aisling exclaimed, after she’d managed to open files, save documents, print letters and keep file copies on floppy disks.

Technology is the Emperor’s New Clothes of the nineties,” said Elizabeth.

“Everyone’s so scared of it that lots of people are terrified to touch a keyboard and the people who are good with computers try and lord it over everyone who isn’t. Look how easily you’ve picked it up.”

“As long as I can do it when you’re gone,” Aisling answered.

“I’m not going far laughed Elizabeth, patting her enormous bump.

“I’ll probably spend the next few weeks stretched out on the couch at home watching reruns of Knots Landing, so just pick up the phone if you’ve got a problem.”

Thanks. It’s great to know that Aisling replied.

“I just hope I can handle Leo as easily she added guardedly. She was

desperate to know what Elizabeth thought of her boss, but wasn’t sure how to broach the subject. Perhaps Leo and Elizabeth got on like a house on fire. It might be a terrible blunder to ask if he made her feel as uncomfortable as he made Aisling.

“Oh, don’t mind Leo,” the other woman said dismissively.

“His bark is much worse than his bite. He’s moodier than any premenstrual woman I’ve ever known! Just ignore his moods.

As long as you keep the office running efficiently and don’t overbook him, he’s a lamb, really.”

A lamb, huh? More like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, Aisling reckoned. However, he’d been pretty harmless all day, acting the part of the busy boss. Aisling wished he’d always be like that. Unfortunately, she suspected that Elizabeth’s presence had a lot to do with it. Who knew what he’d be like when she was gone and he could stare insolently at Aisling again?

Pat Finucane dropped into her office at lunchtime and apologised for not welcoming her in” person the day before.

“How are you getting on?” he asked kindly.

“Brilliant,” said Elizabeth.

“She’ll be running the whole place in a month. I just hope there’s a job for me when I’m finished my maternity leave!”

Buoyed by Elizabeth’s confidence in her, and by her improved relationship with Vivienne, Aisling left for home a much happier woman than she’d been the day before.

Her good mood wasn’t to last.

“Hi, Aisling.” Michael’s cold and distant voice on the phone hit her like a punch in the stomach.

“How are the boys?”

“Fine,” she replied, just as tersely.

“Now that I’m settled, I’d like to see them at the weekends.

They can stay with me on Saturday and go home on Sunday evening, what do you think?”

She didn’t know what to say. They were talking like a divorced couple already.

“I suppose that’s all right,” she answered grudgingly.

“Where will they be staying? “He hesitated for a moment. Could he be trying not to hurt her, she wondered?

“I’m living with Jennifer.”

God, it was like an ice pick in her guts. How could she have thought she was all right, she wondered blankly. Don’t cry, don’t let him see how upset you are.

“Where is that?” she asked in what she hoped was a nonchalant voice.

“Sandymount. It’s just off Sandymount village.”

“How nice,” she replied. They were like two strangers talking, discussing property. They’d be talking about auctioneers’ fees and stamp duty next.

“I don’t want the boys to think that they don’t have a father any more,” Michael said, suddenly intense.

“I want them to have two homes. That’s so important.”

“It might be a bit of a shock to them to find you’re living with someone else, Michael,” she interrupted caustically.

“This has all been rather sudden.”

“I know, I know he said worriedly. From the tone of his voice, she knew exactly what he was doing, running his fingers through his dark hair until it stood up in glossy peaks. She’d always smoothed it down, well, she used to smooth it down, a long, long time ago.

Neither of them spoke for a moment. The silence was almost worse than the stilted conversation.

“We have to talk about money,” she said finally.

“I hear you’ve got a job,” he put in.

“How did you know?”

“I rang Pat to find out how you were. I knew Fiona would have been talking to you.”

“Oh, give me a break, Michael,” she said angrily.

“If you wanted to know how I was, why couldn’t you ring me. I was wondering why you were so silent, couldn’t face talking to me, was that it?”

He sighed tiredly.

“I didn’t ring up to fight, Aisling.”

“We’re not fighting, Michael,” she snapped.

“I just want you to be up front with me. I’m not going to fall on my knees every time you ring and beg you to come back, ok. I’ve got over the begging wife stage.”

Damn him! He made her so angry. Why was he still playing games, weren’t they over that?

“Don’t be afraid to ring me, Michael. I want to talk about money, about the house, about all the practical things. And I want to know where you are so that if there’s a problem with the boys, I can reach

That’s fair enough,” he answered.

“I’m sorry, I should have rung. I don’t know what to say to the boys.”

She was amazed. What an admission from Mr. Know It All!

At least she’d faced up to the realities of the situation and told the boys what was happening. He was scared to. Suddenly, Aisling felt a lot better. She was the strong one, she was the one who’d taken it on the chin. She was fighting back!

What a nice feeling that was.

“You could try the truth,” she said smartly.

“You think so?”

“Well, they’re ten years old, Michael, not ten months. I think they’re going to put two and two together if they spend the night with you and her.” Aisling couldn’t bear to say “Jennifer”.

“You’re right.”

Wow, it was a long time since she’d heard that. A slight smile lifted the corners of her mouth.

“Pick them up at one on Saturday,” she said decisively.

They’ll just be back from soccer and they’ll be ravenous. You could always bring them to McDonald’s, give them lunch and then tell them.”