Wolfsong (61 page)

He was frowning.

I said, “And now that it’s awkward….”

People laughed.

I made a show of taking the first bite.

Joe’s hand never left mine.

And Gordo never looked away.

THE BENNETT
boys were doing the dishes. The humans were on their way to their own homes. Robbie and Mark were in the library. Elizabeth was painting and it was green, green, green.

Gordo said, “Walk with me, Ox.”

I hesitated.

He jerked his head toward the front door.

I sighed but followed him out.

He waited until he knew we were out of earshot of the wolves.

He said, “I know you.”

The day was beginning to darken.

“Long time,” I said, unsure where this was going.

“And we tell each other most things. Because that’s the way we are.”

“Sure, Gordo.”

“Is there anything you want to tell me now?”

I forced myself to look at him. “What do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “I’m not stupid, Ox.”

“I never said you were.”

“Something’s wrong.”

“With what?”

“You.”

I snorted. “Many things.”

“Ox,” he warned me. “Don’t be flip.”

“I’m not trying to be. Gordo, there’s always something wrong. But nothing more than usual.”

“I need you to tell me, Ox. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”

I sighed. “It’s nothing. Okay? I’m just tired. The full moon, work, everything. It happens every now and then. Shit just comes back and piles on. I just need to go to bed early tonight. I’ll be better tomorrow.”

“And you’d tell me, right? If something was wrong.”

Not if it meant keeping him safe. Keeping all of them safe. “Sure, Gordo,” I said, the lie tasting like ash on my tongue.

He watched me for a moment longer, his gaze cool and calculating, before he shook his head. “Fine. Just don’t do that shit to me, Ox. For fuck’s sake, you sounded like you were saying good-bye at dinner. I just—just don’t do that to me.”

“Yeah.” I coughed. “Just tired. All those things come out when I’m tired.”

He rolled his eyes. “Well, go put your feelings all over Joe where they belong. Er—god, I wish I hadn’t said that.”

I laughed, real and true. Gordo tried to push by me to head back to the house, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him into a hug. He let out a grunt of surprise, but his arms wrapped around my back immediately and he gave just as good as he got.

“WHAT DID
Gordo want?” Joe asked me as we walked toward the old house.

The sun was almost gone. The stars were coming out above us.

The wind blew through the trees. They swayed back and forth.

“Shop talk,” I said.

“Shop talk,” Joe said. “Sounds exciting.”

“Ass.”

He grinned fondly at me, taking my hand in his. “Just giving you shit.”

“I know.”

“You gotta keep it up, anyway, if I’m going to be your kept boy.”

“That’s a terrible plan. You should just get a job.”

“GED first, Ox,” he said, like we hadn’t talked about it a million times already. “Then online college. Then probably pick up where Dad left off. We don’t need the money right now.”

“I know,” I said. “You’ll do good.”

“Yeah?”

I leaned over and kissed his cheek. His stubble scraped against my lips. “Yeah. Maybe then
I
could be the kept boy.”

He laughed and shoved me away.

MY PHONE
went off.

Just a single beep.

Joe lay on the couch, his head in my lap, eyes closed as I ran my fingers through his hair. He’d started growing it out again and there was almost enough there for me to hold on to. The TV was on, the sound muted.

I picked up the phone where I’d set it next to me.

I had one new text message.

It was from an unknown number.

You’ve had enough time.

I didn’t let my hands shake.

I said, “Shit.”

Joe opened his eyes. “What?” His voice was rough and wonderful.

“Jessie.”

“What about Jessie?”

“She got a flat tire, and she doesn’t have a jack.”

“Shit. All right, give me a second, and we can—”

“Nah,” I said. “Don’t worry about it. It won’t take long.”

“You sure?”

I nodded, looking down at him. “You’ll see. I’ll be back before you know it.”

He opened his mouth to speak, but then frowned. “Weird.”

“What?”

“Your heart just skipped when you said that. Like—” He shook his head. “Never mind. I’m just tired, I guess. As long as you don’t plan on running off with her, I’ll let you go. This once.”

“Never,” I said, though I thought I was breaking. “I’ll never want anyone else but you.”

He smiled up at me. “You’re such a sap today. Hurry up and go so you can come back. If I’m not asleep, I’ll suck you off.”

“Wow. With an offer like that, I should be running out the door.”

“Damn right.”

He let me lift up his head and move from the couch, putting one of the pillows under him to take the place of my lap. I knelt down next to the couch, cupping his face in my hands. I leaned forward and kissed him. He sighed happily, hand coming up to scratch at the back of my head. He pressed his tongue against my lips, just once, and I pulled away.

I ran my thumbs over his eyebrows. His cheeks. His lips. He hummed softly. Safe. Content.

“I love you,” I said, because if there was one thing I hated, one thing I blamed myself for more than anything else, it was that I hadn’t told him this every day. Multiple times a day. It was a rare thing between us. We didn’t need to say it out loud to know how we felt, but that shouldn’t have stopped me.

“Yeah?” he asked, kissing my thumb before taking it between his teeth and biting gently. He let it go and said, “I love you, too, Ox. You’re my mate. And one day soon, I’m going to show you that.”

I had to go before I couldn’t.

I kissed him again.

Stood.

Picked my keys up off the coffee table.

Took a step back.

His eyes were already closing. “I’ll wait for you,” he mumbled.

My throat closed.

I turned and left before he could see the shine in my eyes.

ALPHA.

What?

I know you’re an Alpha.

I’m not. I’m human. I am
nothing
—

Don’t. Lie. To me. I don’t know how you did it. I don’t know what makes you different. But you are an Alpha, human or not. An Alpha in the Bennett territory, no less.

What do you want?

I have six more people from your town.

You fucking asshole.

I will kill them, Ox. I will kill each and every single one of them. I will make you listen while I tear their arms from their bodies. Ox, one of them is a
child
. Surely you wouldn’t want to be responsible for the death of a
child
.

You goddamn animal.

Oh, Ox. I know this about myself. And if you’re just now figuring that out, you’re a bit late to the game.

You won’t get away with this.

I won’t? Ox, I already have.

What do you want!

You. I want you. If I can’t take the Alpha from Joe, I will take it from you. You will come to me. Alone. And I won’t harm these people. This child. Can you hear them, Ox? They’re crying because they’re scared. Because I’ve already made the child bleed. Just a scratch, but enough to show them how serious I am. To them. To you. Can you see now, Ox? How serious I am?

You won’t ever get to Joe. The wards will keep you out. Even if you’re an Alpha. It doesn’t matter who you have with you. Gordo won’t—

Ox. Ox. Ox, you are
missing
the entire
point
. I don’t
care
about Joe. I don’t
care
about your territory. All I care about is that you are a Bennett in all but name. All I care about is taking from you the one thing Thomas Bennett never wanted me to have. Hell, let me have this, and I won’t harm a single member of your pack.

And you expect me to believe you?

You said it yourself, Ox. I can’t pass the wards. Frankly, whether or not you believe me isn’t a concern of mine. Can you really go on, knowing these innocent people will die because of you?

I….

Ox. You were never meant to be an Alpha. I can take this all away. Your pack will be safe. These people will be safe. Green Creek
will be safe
. And Joe. It’ll hurt, I’m sure. At first. Loss always does, that sharp stab of pain that guts you. But he’s strong. Stronger than even I gave him credit for. He’ll live, because he’ll have a pack that will need him. One day, he’ll smile again at the thought of you, at the memory of
you
.

I can just… can’t I just
give
it to you—

Ah. I’m afraid there isn’t time. I only know of one way to truly take the power of an Alpha. It’s an unfortunate side effect, death is, but I’m sure you can understand. I can promise I’ll even make it as painless as possible.

I can’t. I can’t just
leave
them. They’re my—

Do you hear her screaming? She’s the mother, Ox. Her child is watching as I cut her.

Stop it! Oh my god, stop it. You fucking bastard. Leave them alone!

I’ll give you the remainder of the day. I know how much…
tradition
… meant to Thomas. So have it. Say your good-byes. But, Ox, I swear to you, if I even catch the barest of hints that you’ve deceived me, I will kill them all. And then I will find a way to break these wards. No matter how long it takes. I will
break
them, and I will slaughter every single person you love. I will save you for last. I will make you watch as your pack dies in front of you, and all the while, you’ll be mired in the knowledge that it’s because of
you
, that you could have prevented this. And when I get to Joe, I will
fuck
him until he’s broken. I will
fuck
him until he smells of nothing but me. And then I will rip his heart from his chest. You’ll watch as I eat it. And then, and
only then
, when you are
shattered
at the loss of your pack, at the way every single one was
torn
from you, I will begin on you. I’ll start at your feet and work my way up, and by the time I get to your fucking
knees
, you will be
begging
me to kill you. And I will say no. Do you believe me? Do you believe I’ll do that?

…yes.

Good. That’s real good, Ox. Have your last hours. Not a single word. I won’t touch the people here. Not unless you make me. Your pack will never be safe if you do. You can’t keep them locked in Green Creek forever, Ox. One day, someone will slip and I will be waiting. You do this now, and I
promise
you they will be safe from me.

When.

When I summon you. I’m a monster, Ox, but I’m not
that
bad. I’ll give you time. With those you love.

Where.

The wooden bridge. Where I can smell the spilled blood of Omegas. Mine, maybe. Or they could have been. Was this you, Ox? Did you
defend
your territory like a good Alpha? It’s buried in the dirt, but I can almost
taste
the fear. The pain. The anger. It tastes like Joe did. When I had him. I licked the sweat from his head. Did he ever tell you that? I didn’t go further, but it was a close thing. Every time I snapped one of his little fingers, I wanted to stuff him full of my—

That’s.
Enough
.

Ooh. I can
feel
it. You
are
an Alpha. The
goose bumps
, Ox. They are
crawling
along my skin. I wish there was time to find out how you did it. How you became an Alpha on your own, but alas, there isn’t. I would just hate to prolong the inevitable. It would sour the taste of you.

Take the time you need. I will let you know when to come. Remember, Ox: not a word, or I will make them all suffer. I’ll see you soon.

FOOLISH, YES.

But if there was even the
smallest
chance Richard was being truthful, that he wouldn’t hurt them, wouldn’t hurt
Joe
, I had to take it.

And I couldn’t let innocent people die when I could do something to stop it. Thomas had taught me that there was value in all lives, that it was an Alpha’s responsibility to care for those in his territory, even if they didn’t know what an Alpha was.

Green Creek was mine.

The people here were mine.

I had already failed Mr. Fordham.

I couldn’t let that happen to anyone else.

I waited until I left the dirt road, the truck’s tires kicking up dust before they rolled onto asphalt, before I started to mute the bonds between myself and the pack one by one.

We did that sometimes, when we wanted privacy. When we were being intimate. When we wanted to be alone. When we wanted to not be overwhelmed by the continuous feeling of
pack pack pack
.

When we wanted to keep secrets.

I rarely did this.

And I knew it wouldn’t be long before questions were asked.

Green Creek was almost empty this late. The moon was half full. The street lamps along the main drag burned softly. I didn’t see any other cars moving.

The diner was lit up almost like a beacon. I saw a waitress moving around inside as I passed by. She held a pot of coffee in her hands. She was smiling, about what, I’d never know.

My mother sat in the seat beside me.