Witch Is Why Time Stood Still (A Witch P.I. Mystery Book 13) (3 page)

“I can’t do Wednesday; it would have to be Tuesday.”

“I can’t do Tuesday; I go to my pottery class on Tuesday. What about Monday?”

“You know I can’t do Monday. I go swimming then.”

Oh, boy. It was like the good old days all over again. Time for my intervention.

“How about Friday?” I suggested.

“Yeah, Friday’s okay for me,” Amber said.

“Me too.”

“That’s settled then. Friday night is
twins night
.”

“What about the guys?” Pearl said. “Do you think they’ll mind?”

“If I know them, they’ll be glad to get rid of you for an evening.”

Chapter 4

After the twins and I had taken Barry back to Aunt Lucy’s, I magicked myself back to Washbridge. I’d been living at Jack’s flat for almost six months, and the place was driving me insane. When I’d agreed to move in, I hadn’t really appreciated just how poky it was. And don’t get me started on the furniture. I loved Jack, but the man had no taste whatsoever. A few weeks ago, we’d decided to look for a new place. We both liked the idea of a house; we’d lived in flats for too long. We couldn’t afford anything very big, but we’d eventually found a small two-bed house in Smallwash, a suburb of Washbridge. Tomorrow was the day we were due to move in—tomorrow was the ‘big day’.

Jack arrived home ten minutes after me.

“How was work?” I said.

“Okay. A bit busy, but I’m starting to find my way around now. What about you? Have you met my successor yet? He should have started by now.”

“Lee O’Riley? No, not yet. The one consolation is that he can’t be any worse than you were when you first arrived here.”

“Thanks, petal. I’ll take that as a compliment.”

I gave him a look. He knew I hated it when he called me that.

“It’s a term of endearment.” He put on that innocent face of his.

“If you call me that one more time, you’ll get my foot up your backside. Let’s see how endearing you find that.”

“You’re touchy. Had a bad day?”

“No. Quite good, actually. I’ve landed a new client.”

“Anything juicy?”

“It’s certainly intriguing. A jewel robbery.”

“Was it a break-in?”

“No, the thefts took place while the shops were open, but no one saw the robbers.”

“What do you mean, no one saw them?”

“There have been several robberies, and they all follow the same pattern. One minute there’s a tray of jewellery on the counter, the next minute the jewellery has gone. Poof!”

“That’s impossible.”

“You’d think so, but that seems to be what happened. It’s on CCTV.”

“Are the police involved?”

“I assume so, but according to the guy who came to see me today, nothing much has happened. Typical police.”

“Hey! Watch it.” He grinned. “So what have you found out so far?”

“Give me a chance. I only took on the case today, and I won’t get the opportunity to do anything tomorrow, will I?”

“You were the one who wanted to move house.”

“I seem to recall it was a joint decision.”

“You telling me
we move or else
, doesn’t constitute a joint decision. I like this place.”

“Well you’d better say your goodbyes because after tomorrow, this poky little hole will belong to someone else.”

***

The next morning, Jack’s phone rang at stupid o’clock. Still half asleep, I went into the kitchen to make coffee while he took the call in the bedroom.

“I’ve got to go into work.” He yawned.

“What do you mean,
you’ve got to go in
? Have you forgotten we’re moving today?”

“I know, but there was a double homicide last night. Everyone has to go in; all leave has been cancelled.”

“You can’t be serious!”

“There’s nothing I can do.”

“I can’t manage the move by myself. I thought the plan was that I’d go to the new house, and you’d stay here until they’d collected everything?”

“It was, and it can still work. Everything here is packed and ready. I’ll drop in at the removals company, and give them a key to this place. They don’t need anyone to be here—they know what needs to be collected because we’ve put stickers on everything. The storage people will bring all of your stuff. You just need to be at the new place to supervise when both of them arrive.”

“Where am I going to put everything in the new house?”

“Put it where you can. We’ll sort it out when I get back tonight.”

“Can’t you call in sick?”

He gave me that look of his. “I have to get going. I’ll see you at the house, tonight. Okay?”

“Yeah, great. Thanks very much!”

Fantastic! It looked like it was all on me. I’d thought I was going to have an easy day. I’d planned to put my feet up while Jack organised everything. I couldn’t even call Kathy to ask if Peter could give me a hand because she, Peter and the kids were having a day trip to the seaside.

Unless—maybe if they hadn’t set off, I could still catch them.

What? Sheesh, I was only joking. Even I wouldn’t be so horrible as to spoil the kids’ day at the seaside.

After breakfast, I drove to the new house. We’d been there several times since we first viewed it, but this was the first time I’d travelled there by myself. When I was about half a mile from the toll bridge, I came across a queue of standing traffic. Great! This day was getting better and better. We’d never encountered any traffic jams on our previous visits. In fact, we’d both remarked on how quiet the roads were.

Some of the people ahead of me were beeping their horns. I’m not sure what good they thought that was going to do. After not moving for over five minutes, I turned off the engine, and walked down the line of cars.

“What’s going on?” I asked a man walking in the opposite direction.

“There’s a new guy taking the fees on the toll bridge. He doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing. I’ve been working the night shift. At this rate, by the time I get home, I’ll have to turn straight around and go back to work again.”

Back in the car, I switched the radio on. It looked as though it was going to be a long wait.

It was another twenty minutes before I eventually reached the bridge. There was only one man on duty in the small booth; he was collecting the fees by hand. Why didn’t they have automated machines?

“Forty pence, please,” the man said. It was a voice I recognised. A voice I hadn’t heard for over six months. A voice I thought I left behind when I moved into Jack’s place.

“Mr Ivers?”

“Hello, Jill.” He looked as surprised as I did. “I wondered where you’d gone. You just disappeared overnight.”

Behind me, people were shouting, and beeping their horns.

“I moved in with Jack. You remember him, don’t you? The policeman.”

“You didn’t leave a forwarding address. I haven’t been able to get your newsletter to you.”

“Oh yeah, sorry about that. I must have forgotten.” Snigger.

“Not to worry. I knew you’d want them, so I saved all the back issues. There are twenty-four now. If you let me have your new address, I’ll bring them over to you.”

“Actually, we’re moving into our new house in Smallwash, today. I don’t remember the address.” I lied.

“In that case, I’ll bring your back issues to work with me. The next time you come over the bridge, you can collect them, and pay me.”

Beep, beep, beep.

The people in the queue behind me were getting angrier and angrier.

“I suppose I’d better get going, Mr Ivers. How much is the toll, again?”

“Forty pence, please.”

“There you go.” I gave him the correct change.

“Thanks. It’s nice to see you again, Jill.”

“And you, Mr Ivers.”

“And don’t worry, I won’t forget your newsletters.”

Surely this day couldn’t get any worse.

I parked on the road because I wanted to leave the driveway clear for the removal van. I was such a numbskull; why hadn’t I thought to bring something to eat and drink with me? Just a few custard creams and tea or coffee would have done.

The removal van was supposed to arrive at any moment, but it was likely to be much later if it was held up by Mr Ivers. Just then, there was a knock at the door—perhaps they’d lost patience, and rammed the barrier on the toll bridge. I glanced out of the front window, but there was no sign of a removal van. Whoever was at the door knocked again.

“Hi.” It was a woman, probably in her late fifties. She had a huge smile, and was holding a plate.

“Welcome, neighbour. I live next door.” She gestured to the house behind her. “My name is Rita. Rita Rollo.”

“Nice to meet you, Mrs Rollo. I’m Jill Gooder.” I offered my hand, but then realised that her hands were full of plate.

“Will you be living here alone, Jill?”

“No. Jack’s had to work. He’ll be here later tonight.”

“I made this for you.” She glanced down at the plate.

“That’s very sweet of you. It’s a pity you dropped it, but it’s the thought that counts.”

“Dropped it?” She looked puzzled.

I glanced again at the monstrosity on the plate.

“Dropped? I meant—err—topped. It’s a pity you topped it because I really like un-topped cake.”

Now, she looked even more confused.

“I call it Chocolate Surprise.” She handed me the ‘
cake
’.

“Thanks. It’s very—err—chocolaty. And definitely surprising.”

“I love to bake. It’s my only hobby.”

“Have you been doing it long?”

“Oh yes. Years and years. In fact, I enter all the local W.I. competitions.”

“Have you won any?”

“Not yet, but I did come third in the fruit cake section last time out.”

“That’s good. Were there many entrants?”

“Not many. Three, I think. Do you bake, Jill?”

“Me? No, I can’t bake for toffee.”

“Maybe I could give you lessons some time.”

“Yeah, maybe. Although I am very busy.”

Just then, I spotted the removal van coming up the road.

“This looks like our stuff. I’ll have to go. Thanks again for the—err—cake.”

I put the plate onto the breakfast bar, and hurried back to the front door.

“Morning, love,” a man with a flat cap greeted me. “I don’t know why you’re moving here. That bridge is a nightmare.”

“It’s not always as bad as that. There’s a new man working there today.”

“My pet ferret could take cash faster than that muppet. Where do you want us to put your stuff, love?”

It was the furniture from Jack’s flat.

“Would you take it upstairs and put it in the back bedroom?”

“All of it? Will there be room?”

“Just pile it in there as best you can.”

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

It took them a little under an hour to get everything upstairs. The back bedroom was absolutely jam packed. I could barely open the door, but at least it had hidden away all that hideous furniture.

My own stuff was coming from the storage depot. Annoyingly, they hadn’t been able to give me a precise time when they would arrive. By mid-morning, I was really peckish, and would have killed for a custard cream. There was a corner shop only a five-minute walk away. If I hurried, I could pick up some custard creams and a drink, and be back in no time. To be on the safe side, I put a note on the door: ‘
Back in five minutes’.

Chapter 5

The corner shop was imaginatively named ‘Corner Shop’. Even though it was very small, it carried an enormous range of stock. There was very little room between the aisles of shelves. The man behind the counter was unremarkable except for his toupee. He was reading a newspaper, which he’d laid out on the counter. Every time he leaned forward, the toupee slid forward too. On one occasion, it actually dropped onto the counter in front of him. This didn’t seem to faze him though; he simply picked it up and popped it back onto his head. It was really quite hilarious.

“Hi,” I said.

“Hello there. I haven’t seen you in here before. Are you new to the area?”

“We’re moving in just up the road. I was hoping I might be able to pick up some custard creams. Do you have any?”

“The king of biscuits? Of course.”

I liked this man already.

“My name is Jugg, but everyone calls me Toby.”

“That’s very good.” I laughed.

He seemed puzzled. “Toby’s my first name.”

“Right. Of course. Well, Toby, perhaps you could point me in the direction of the custard creams.”

“I can do better than that. I’ll take you to them.” He walked around the counter and led the way down the aisle. “Here they are.”

As he stooped down to pick up a packet, his toupee slipped off his head, and landed on the floor. I didn’t know where to look, so pretended to check my phone. Toby didn’t miss a beat. He simply picked it up, and slapped it back on his head.

“These are on a one for two offer.”

“Don’t you mean a two for one offer?”

“Oh yes, of course. I always get that mixed up.”

“BOGOF.”

“There’s no need for that.” He looked horrified.

“No, I didn’t mean
bog off
. I meant B-O-G-O-F. Buy One Get One Free.”

“BOGOF? How very clever. Did you just come up with that? You should be in retail. I must start to use it. It’s quite brilliant.”

“How much are the custard creams?”

“Have those on me. Call it a ‘welcome to the neighbourhood’ gift, and also by way of a thank you for such a brilliant idea. I’m going to make some BOGOF signs right now.”

A free packet of custard creams? Things were beginning to look up.

Spoke too soon.

When I got back to the house, the front garden was piled high with storage boxes and furniture. My furniture! There was no sign of the storage company’s van.

Mrs Rollo came charging over.

“I told them you’d only gone to the shop. I pointed out the note you left on the door, but they weren’t interested. They said they didn’t have time to hang around, and just dropped it all on the garden. What on earth will you do?”

“I don’t know, but thank you for trying to stop them.”

“Not at all, dear. Some people just don’t care. I’d help you myself, but I’m afraid my back isn’t up to it.”

“I understand. Thanks anyway.”

There was no way I was going to be able to carry all that furniture inside by myself. After checking all around to make sure no one was watching, I cast a spell to shrink all the boxes and furniture. They were now small enough to fit inside a doll’s house. I quickly scooped them up, and carried them inside. Once I’d put everything in the correct room, I reversed the spell. Easy peasy!

There was a knock at the door. If the storage men had come back, they were going to get a piece of my mind.

“Mrs Rollo? Is everything all right?”

“No. Something terrible has happened. Someone has stolen your furniture! One minute it was in the garden, and the next—” She stopped dead because she’d just spotted the furniture in the living room. “It’s in here?”

“Yes, I managed to get it all inside.”

“However did you do that so quickly?”

That was a very good question.

“I do a lot of physical work in my job, so it wasn’t difficult.”

“Oh? Right.” She still looked puzzled. “All’s well that ends well, I suppose. I’d better be going. Bye, then.”

Oh bum! I’d only just moved in, and I’d already given the neighbour reason to be suspicious of me. I’d have to be much more careful with my use of magic from now on.

Jack eventually turned up just after nine o’clock that evening.

“It’s been a long day. I’m shattered.” He glanced around. “Where’s all my stuff?”

“Have you eaten?” I tried to change the subject.

He checked the living room and dining room, and then made his way upstairs to the main bedroom. I followed.

“None of my stuff is here. Didn’t they deliver it?”

“Yes, it arrived okay.”

He followed my gaze as I glanced at the spare bedroom. As he opened the door, a chair almost fell on top of him.

“What’s it all doing in here?”

“I thought it was only fair. I’ve lived in your flat for the last six months, and had to put up with your stuff.”

“What do you mean
put up with it
? Couldn’t we have a mix? It doesn’t have to be one or the other. I’ve got some really good stuff in here.”

“Where?”

“These chairs for example.”

They were beyond hideous.

“You left me in the lurch today, so I had to do the best I could. My furniture was already set out by the time your stuff arrived,” I lied. “I thought it would be easier to put yours in here, and get things out as and when we need them.” Like never.

He looked far from convinced. “Okay. I guess so.”

We made our way back downstairs, and into the kitchen.

“What on earth is that?”

“That’s a ‘welcome’ present from our next door neighbour, Mrs Rollo.”

“Yes, but
what
is it?”

“A cake.”

“You really should be more careful, Jill. After all the work she’d put into baking it, you go and drop it.”

***

When I arrived at the office the next morning, Mrs V was chuntering away about something.

“Are you okay, Mrs V?”

“I’m fine. It’s the
others
that are the problem. How did your house move go?”

“Jack had to work, so it was left to muggins here to sort everything out.”

“Oh dear. I bet that was a disaster, then.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

“Organisation isn’t exactly your strong suit, is it, Jill? That’s why you have me.”

“It actually went okay. We got all of my furniture out of storage. It looks great in the new house.”

“What about Jack’s stuff?”

“I put it all in the back bedroom.”

“How does he feel about that?”

“He’ll come around to the idea.” Eventually.

“Anyway Jill, you and I need to have words.”

Oh dear. That didn’t sound good.

“I am rather busy this morning, Mrs V.”

“That will have to wait. This is important. It’s about Jules.”

I had a feeling it might be. “What about her?”

“That young
lady
shows no respect for me at all.”

“You never see one another. Jules works different days to you.”

“I mean in the way she treats my possessions. Look, I’ll show you.”

She beckoned me around the desk, and pointed to the bottom left-hand drawer. “This is my knitting drawer. And this.” She opened the bottom right-hand drawer. “This is my crochet drawer. Does that look like crochet to you?”

The only thing in the drawer was a pile of magazines. “Don’t tell me Jules has thrown your crochet out.”

“Good heavens, no. I wouldn’t be sitting here talking to you now if she had. I’d be hunting her down.”

“So where is your crochet?”

“Here!” She opened the bottom left-hand drawer.

“I thought you said that was your knitting drawer?”

“It is, but if you look closely, you’ll see my knitting drawer now contains knitting
and
crochet.”

“So, let me get this straight. Jules has moved your crochet out of that drawer, and put it into this one.”

“Correct.”

“Is that so terrible?”

“That’s not all she’s done.” Mrs V glared at me. “Look! This is where I keep my patterns.”

This time she was pointing to the middle right-hand drawer.

“Does that look like patterns to you?”

“No, it looks like makeup.”

“Correct.”

“It looks to me like Jules has taken the drawers on the right hand side of the desk, and left you with the drawers on the left.”

“Precisely.”

“But surely, now you’re sharing jobs, that’s only fair. Isn’t it?”

“I might have known you’d side with her. How long have I worked for you, and your father before you?”

“A long time.”

“I think that entitles me to keep my wool, crochet and patterns in the drawer of my choice. Don’t you, Jill?”

“Well—err—it—” I glanced at my office door. “Was that my phone?”

“I didn’t hear anything.”

“I think it was. We’ll talk about this later.”

I took that opportunity to slip through to my office. I’d needed that little outburst like I needed a hole in the head. At least I’d have some sanctuary in my own office.

“Jill! This is an emergency,” Winky yelled.

Once again, I’d spoken too soon.

“What’s wrong? Have you run out of salmon?”

“Nothing so trivial. Bella is leaving.”

“What do you mean
leaving
?”

“Leaving! As in going away. No longer here.”

“I know what the word means, but why? She hasn’t run away with Socks again, has she?”

Winky gave me his one-eyed death-stare. “No, she has
not
run off with Socks or anyone else for that matter. Bella and I are an item now. The humans she lives with have decided they’re going to live somewhere else.”

“When did all of this happen?”

“I’ve only just found out. Bella sent me a message via helicopter.”

“How is she taking it?”

“How do you think? She’s devastated.”

“I’m really sorry, but I’m not sure what I can do about it.”

“You’d better think of something, and quick, because if I lose Bella, I’m going to be terminally depressed. Do you really want to have to live with that?”

I didn’t. It was bad enough living with a happy Winky. Living with a depressed Winky didn’t bear thinking about.

“Okay, I’ll see what I can do. But I’m not promising anything.”

“If Bella leaves me, I don’t know what I’ll do. I’ll probably sink into the depths of despair.” He put a paw to his head.

“Okay, enough of the amateur dramatics. I get it.”