Wishing on a Rodeo Moon (Women of Character) (2 page)

She had
seen the look in her daddy's eyes that one time he had come to see her. The
pity had made her angry and determined to get back to one hundred percent. She
wouldn’t give up. She would see what look he wore when she made the
finals. Finally leaving the rehab and coming to this place to regroup was the
first step in achieving that goal.

She also
needed to repair the strained relationship between her and Mama. Each day Tye
put it off, it became that much harder. Pride wouldn’t allow her to go
back home after the terrible things she’d said to Mama in the hospital.
As for her apartment, it had been taken over after the accident by someone who
could afford expensive rent. So she had no place else to go except here.

Looking
around, Tye began to feel a surge of hope. For the first time since her
accident she could be comfortable and relax somewhere. Wherever she looked was
pure Oklahoma. Vast and familiar.

Tye
wheeled her chair onto the smooth blacktop. The walkway continued toward the
house, to a side door with a short ramp.

Ben had
assured her the ranch house was fully equipped to handle special needs. It
belonged to a friend of his, but Tye hadn't been interested enough to inquire
further. At the time she'd been in an apathetic frame of mind. She had never
dealt with depression before. Now she struggled with it almost daily, and it
depleted her.

At the
best of times she doubted herself, wondered if she was crazy to try and be
normal once more. At the worst, she wondered how she could resume normalcy if
part of her, a leg she’d always taken for granted, was gone. The doubts
raged mostly at night, but sometimes they crept into her daylight hours.

"I'm
going inside," Tye told the driver. "I'll get my bag later."

"That's
okay, Tye," he said with a quick smile. "I'll bring it in."

Tye
shrugged, unable to summon the energy necessary for ordinary responses. She
wheeled herself up the short ramp. A large knobbed handle had been screwed into
the door above the doorknob. Tye pushed it down and the door swung inward.

She
wheeled herself through the doorway and into a large, bright room lined with
floor-to-ceiling windows. The walls were painted a warm ecru with darker wood
trim.

A
kitchenette occupied the far right side of the room, and grab bars were placed
at various points throughout the kitchen. The stove and sink were open beneath
for wheelchair access. The cabinets were low and also had large handle pulls.

Tye
moved into the bedroom. Attached to the headboard of an attractive maple-wood
bed was a trapeze for ease of movement. Closets with wide handles lined one wall.

Tye
inspected the small bathroom off the bedroom. This room had also been equipped
with grab bars for the tub and toilet, with an optional bath seat for the tub.

She
rolled her head back, the remainder of the tension draining from her body. The
apartment had been well planned. Tye heard someone in the other room. She
wheeled her chair back to the living room, irritated that the driver
hadn’t left.

"I
told you to leave them." Her voice trailed off as surprise ― shock
― clutched her insides.

Jake
Miller stood in her doorway.

Tye’s
heart fluttered in a panic, anxiety churning in her chest. "Jake ―
dammit, what’s going on?" she whispered. He stepped inside, holding
her suitcase and overnight bag, then leaned down and placed a case on either
side of his booted feet.

He
straightened and walked forward. He looked taller and bulkier than Tye
remembered, but then ten years was a long time. Light blue eyes in a dark, lean
face caught her off guard, making her grip her fingers together. He’d
always been so handsome, and so unaware of it. Needing time to collect herself,
she drew a short, choppy breath. The sensation of panic escalated. She needed
to ease it, but all she could do was stare. Jake. God! Why was she being
punished? Hadn’t the empty years been punishment enough?

Jake
nodded at her, his gaze steady. She sensed the wariness in him. She’d
always been able to pick up on Jake’s emotions. They used to laugh about
it. Tye wasn’t laughing now; she was doing her best to ease the pain in
her throat.

She
couldn’t tear her gaze away from him, but she wanted to. Lord, how she
needed something else to concentrate on. She felt vaguely disoriented, then
something clicked into place. She remembered him from the night of the accident
― the dark, almost black hair; those eyes, so direct and piercing. .
.Those recollection caused her breath to grow shallow. She rubbed her palms
together, his voice swirling through her memory. She was in quicksand,
flailing. She hated this lack of control.

Anxiety
made her flinch back from the hand he held out now. She needed to catch her
breath, but it was erratic, getting away from her. It all seemed too much. She
prayed she wasn’t in for another anxiety attack.

"Hello,
Tye. It’s good to see you." Some part of her registered his deep
voice, rich and smoky. He appeared so calm, as if seeing her didn’t
bother him at all. Her presence conjured no emotion in him, at least none that
showed on his face. Tye’s panic subsided just a fraction. She ignored his
outstretched hand. She couldn't touch him. How could she be expected to touch
him as if they hadn’t parted with harsh words and tears ten years ago?
All those wasted years.

Her
breath escaped noisily and she heard a sound come from her throat, a weird,
short bark of surprise. She tried again. "What are you doing here in my
apartment?" She tried to see around him and knew instinctively they were
alone. "Where's the driver?"

"I
told him I'd bring in your cases. He left."

"What
the hell is going on?" she asked. Tye could feel herself losing control,
but she didn’t care. She needed answers while she could concentrate.
Damn, she felt ready to drop. Those light eyes gazed at her, but she couldn't
even begin to guess at his thoughts. Ten years!

"This
is my place, part of my house, that is. Ben said you needed somewhere to
stay." One large hand indicated the room. "It's been empty, so I told
Ben you could use it."

Not
liking the feeling of being cornered, Tye wheeled away from him. "This is
your place. Your house. Ben rented me a room at your house?" Tye held her
breath, waiting for him to deny it. She needed to stall for time. Her thinking
process felt like mush.

"Yes.
I assumed Ben had told you.

"Guess
it slipped his mind," Tye snapped. "He just told me I’d be
renting a room from a friend of his. I don’t recall him mentioning that
you were that friend."

Tye
didn't want to feel the tightness in her chest. She was confused, not a feeling
she welcomed. No way could this man be her blue-eyed protector from that
terrible night. Her memory of that time seemed skewed, as if she’d seen
it through someone else’s eyes. She had thought often of that night, but
it didn’t seem real.

Her
senses ultra-heightened, Tye knew he stood behind her. She could hear him
breathing. She clenched her thigh, looking down at her legs, the one pant leg
empty and flat. Why was she like this?

Jake
cleared his throat. "I was there that day."

"That
day?" she repeated hoarsely, turning back to him. Desperately, she
searched his face.

Jake
nodded.

"I
don’t want to talk about it." Tye knew the truth and it tore at her.
She had known from the moment she saw his eyes. She would never forget the look
there, the compassion, the fear. Why had he been afraid? He had been her
protector the night of the accident. In a hidden recess of her mind, she had
clung to the memory of his strength during her hospital stay, and then later
during the stressful, intense rehabilitation process.

"It
wasn’t real," she muttered. She had thought of him as a guardian
angel, not a real man. Not her Jake. Damn! Tye clenched her hands.
Get over it
, a voice screamed inside,
he’s not your Jake
.

She
hadn’t asked anyone about him. She had wanted to believe it was all a
figment of her imagination, a spiritual presence sent during her desperate time
of need. He had kept her calm while she had been extricated from under that
bull. He had been her lifeline, then when medical help arrived, she hadn't seen
him again. He had left her, but knowing he had been there during the worst of
it had made her feel protected and special. It was strange, but she had never
felt so protected in her life, and all because of a man who now looked at her
as if she meant no more than a stranger.

Tye
pulled her thoughts back. They
were
strangers.

She
clenched her jaw and set her shoulders. "This is too much. I cannot handle
this." She had said the words out loud. Oddly, she felt as if all her
dreams were being ripped away. Tye tried to stay calm, but as her gaze darted
around the room, regret sliced through her.

"This
place would have been perfect," she muttered. "Now it’s all
ruined." It wasn't quite clear as to why, but she knew she couldn't stay
here in such close proximity to Jake. The real Jake was no guardian angel, but
a man who despised her. Maybe he had a right to after what she had done that
night long ago.

"Tye."

Without
thinking about it, Tye wheeled quickly toward him, adroitly aiming the chair
between the door and his legs.

Jake
quickly pulled his toes in. "Hey," he said, "I've brought all
the bags in. There's nothing else out there."

Tye
threw back her shoulder-length blond hair and looked straight up at him.
"As soon as you move, there'll be something out there. Me."

He
looked startled and lifted his brows. Deftly, Tye wheeled past him. She heard
his footsteps follow her down the ramp. She wheeled the chair faster, faster,
her arms feeling as if they’d fall off. Damn! Why had the driver left so
quickly?

Tye
stopped at the edge of the driveway just in time to see the van disappear. Her
shoulders slumped. She cursed under her breath as Jake moved into her line of
vision.

"What's
the problem, Tye? If something needs changing, I can have it done."

"No."
Hurriedly, she shook her head, refusing to look at him. It hurt so much, the
thoughts in her head. He was too handsome, too much for her to look at. Memory
slammed her. Jake bending down tenderly to kiss her, helping her over some
rough spots when they went hiking. She recalled how he’d surprised her
with flowers when they had been dating for a month and how he’d cheered
her up when she lost a rodeo event. He used to tenderly rest his arm along her
shoulders at the movies. She recalled the small wooden animals he carved and
how he would hide them for her to find... Every minute detail she had
remembered about him was the same: the blueness of his eyes; the small crinkles
alongside his straight, firm mouth: the square, clean line of his jaw.

Tye
again looked at her legs, intense, emotional pain tightening her mouth. Why did
she have to be like this? Why wasn't she normal? The regret of wasted years,
what now felt like a wasted life, was too much.

"This
won't work," she said through gritted teeth. "I need complete
privacy. Nothing personal, but I need to be totally alone. How could you
imagine this would ever work? We haven’t seen each other in years, and then
to be thrown together like this."

"I
live in another part of the house. If you don't want contact, I won't intrude.
I work all day, anyhow. I thought I'd help you get settled in, is all."
His voice sounded so calm and practical.

Tye
shook her head quickly. "No, it won't work. I need a phone. Can I use your
phone?"

Jake
said, "Sure. Come on over to my house. Your phone should be working later
tonight."

Jake
sensed any offer of help on his part would be swiftly rejected. He walked ahead
of Tye, leading the way. For the hundredth time he asked himself how he could
have been so stupid as to agree to let her stay in the empty apartment at his
ranch.

Because you’re a sucker
, he thought as they
neared his house. That wasn’t true and Jake knew it. He and Tye went back
a long way, and a part of him still cared about her. She had nowhere else to go
and she needed help.

Maybe it
was ten years too late, but Jake saw this as an opportunity to exorcize her ghost
from his life. His box manufacturing business had reached a point of success
where he could hire a manager. His wildlife wood and antler carving business
thrived. Jake never would have guessed his carving hobby would turn into such a
success. Come hell or high water, Jake was heading down the road to his future
and he wasn’t looking back.

Having
Tye at the ranch would be a small price to pay if it meant closing doors on old
wounds. Why had he left it so long? Finding a picture of Tye from some old clippings
had prompted him to go to the rodeo that night, three months ago. Curiosity had
taken him there. Fascination had made him stay, and now an urgent compulsion
drew him further into her sphere.

Jake
hoped to God he could handle the reality of her injury. His father had lost
both legs before he died, so Jake knew what was involved. He wasn’t sure
he wanted to deal with it ― all over again. Jake didn’t know how he
was going to handle it. The best thing to do would be stay out of each other’s
way. He had promised Ben that Tye could recuperate here; there was no going
back. But his personal feelings had no importance in the scheme of things.
After all, surely he’d gotten over Tye years ago. The best thing to do
would be stay out of each other’s way.

This reunion
scene with Tye was playing out like he had been afraid it would. She had taken
one look at him and her hackles had risen full speed. Why? She had walked out
on him, so why would she be afraid of him? She looked bone tired, frail, and
her voice was bordering on panic. Jake had to keep her from leaving at all
costs. He was afraid something would happen to her if she left in the state she
was now. He needed to think fast. He had six sisters: he should know what to
do, right?