Winter's Kiss (24 page)

His eyebrows knitted into a frown.

If the laws changed, would he come back to her?

She felt foolish for thinking these things. Her heart couldn’t bear the thought that he might say no if she asked him. It was already a fragile thing in her chest, made of fractured glass and ready to smash into a million pieces with the slightest tap.

“Put me down,” she said instead, voice low and hiding none of her feelings. Misery was fast becoming her best friend.

“What is the
matter?”

“Do you really need to ask?” She prised his fingers off her and fell to the floor, surprised at her agility when she landed firmly on her feet. She had expected to hit the ground on her backside.

Placing a little distance between them, she tried to get everything straight in her head but the more she thought about it, the more torn she became. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to make Winter stay or to let him go in the hope that he would come back to her. Half of her understood his need to leave and that he couldn’t change himself in a matter of a few days when he had been alive for over one thousand years. He couldn’t shed his duty and the laws he had upheld for centuries in only a handful of hours.

She had seen the face of his loyalty, standing guard night after night, unwavering in his dedication to his lord, and she knew that what she saw on the surface was only a fraction of his sense of duty. Asking him to shun the law and his kin was asking the impossible of him. It was all he knew. It was the same for her. When she had been hurt and scared, she had wanted to return to the village and the people she knew. She felt safe there. She still wanted to return, even when a part of her wanted to stay with Winter, and even though she knew that nothing remained for her there. Was it instinct? The sense of safety? Perhaps it was fear of the unknown for them both. Winter feared the strange new world they had stumbled into as much as she did, but for him it was far worse. He had laws to obey or he would face a penalty.

Yet to say that she understood his desire to leave would be to lie. She didn’t understand, but then there was a lot she couldn’t comprehend right now. She didn’t understand why the master and mistress of this place could be together and she couldn’t be with Winter. Perhaps she would be able to understand everything when she knew more about Winter and about this place. Perhaps when she knew his reason for leaving.

“We should go. Mikael will be waiting for us,” Winter said in a calm unhurried voice that made her believe that he didn’t want to go and see Mikael.

She wished they didn’t have to. If she stayed out here a little longer and asked Winter all the questions that were plaguing her, she was sure she would grow to understand him and the owners of this place. Right now, her confusion was stealing her voice, turning her silent and thoughtful. She needed time to think and to clear her head.

“Can’t it wait a little longer?” Her look turned hopeful.

Winter sighed and then glanced in the direction of the door. The woman was back and she had brought the man with her.

“Are we interrupting?” Mikael said, his voice as deep and menacing as she remembered. The marks on his throat from where Winter had throttled him were gone. He had healed so quickly.

She touched her throat. Hers still bore the bruising and still ached sometimes. Mikael’s eyes dropped to her neck and then shifted to the side. He stared. She knew exactly what had his attention. Pulling her hair around, she covered Winter’s bite mark and looked at him. Winter moved to stand beside her, his hand again on his sword hilt.

“Not at all,” she said and edged closer to Winter. The man still frightened her. She couldn’t look at him without fear tightening her body and her guard going up. Although her instincts no longer said he was dangerous, she still couldn’t bring herself to trust him. Perhaps he could gain some of her trust though. She smiled to herself. Who better to answer some of her questions than someone who lived here? “I was wondering something.”

Both Winter and Mikael looked at her. The woman bowed and walked away, leaving them alone.

“How come the mistress of this place is a vampire?” Nika said without any hint of her nerves, although she was sure both men could sense her fear. “How is it they’re together?”

“I did not come here to be questioned, but I will answer you,” Mikael said and walked to the low stone wall surrounding the balcony. The moon peeked over the trees, waning and now only two thirds full.

Nika moved away from Mikael, backing into Winter. Winter’s hand came to rest on her shoulder and as much as she wanted to draw comfort from his touch, this time it only made her heart pound with adrenaline and fear. He hadn’t stopped Mikael from answering her question, but she could sense that he wasn’t happy about what she had asked. She hadn’t bothered to hide the fact that she was trying to understand why the couple who owned this place were together. She wanted Winter to know that was what she was asking. She wanted him to see that she wasn’t going to give up on a relationship with him. She refused to pass eternity alone. There had to be a way to convince Winter to be with her.

“My lord was once a slave of Venia, forced to guard that which they held most precious, the vampire Mia. Dmitri did his duty and was one of only a few survivors during an attempt on Mia’s life. The Venia repaid him by punishing him. Mia repaid him by setting him free. She sought to elevate Dmitri to her personal guard. When the Venia forced a human match upon her, she fled with Dmitri, forsaking her kin.”

There was a certain amount of emphasis placed on his last three words. Forsaking her kin. Mikael’s gaze slid to Winter and then back to her. A brief smirk tugged his lips, mocking her thoughts as though he could read her mind and sense her doubt. Winter would never forsake his bloodline. He had protected her though, as Mia had

212

protected Dmitri. But perhaps that wasn’t enough. Perhaps this couple could be together because Dmitri was their lord and his rule was absolute. If she were the leader here, they would probably turn a blind eye to her love for Winter.

“Mia has earned our respect. She is a brave leader and fights beside our lord for the freedom of our kind. She sides with the werewolves and has turned her back on the vampires. She is mate of our lord.”

“I see,” Nika said and resisted a sigh. That was how it was. Winter was right. Werewolves hated vampires and they only allowed this match because they were weaker than their lord. Mikael’s words about Mia protecting the werewolves and fighting beside them were a cover, something he was saying to make her feel as though trying to be with Winter was pointless because he would never turn his back on his species.

In reality, there was a clear path to having her relationship with Winter accepted by these people and she was willing to tread that path, run it if she could, for however long it took her to reach the end. She would grow stronger. She would become strong enough that the werewolves here wouldn’t dare question her and her feelings for Winter. No matter how long it took. One day, she would stand proud within their ranks and they would all cower at her feet.

She sighed. It was a nice dream to have. She flexed her fingers, curling and uncurling them. She didn’t even know how to fight. How could she grow strong enough that the men here would fear and respect her if she couldn’t fight?

“No more questions?” Mikael said, tone cold and snide.

She hated him. Anger rose inside her, filling every inch until her hands were tight trembling fists at her side. Who was he to try to stop her from loving Winter? Who was he to hurt her? Lifting her head, she stared at him, her green eyes narrowed into slits. He frowned back at her and she sensed a change in his scent. He had felt her anger.

Winter moved past her and placed himself between them, his hand still against her shoulder.

“Let the man speak, Nika, and then we can continue our conversation. I will answer your questions.”

His words surprised her so much that her attention wavered to him. He looked honest enough. Did he truly intend to answer all her questions for her? Didn’t he know how long that would take? She didn’t even know the right words to voice all the questions inside her. Most of them were just feelings, a mixture of colliding thoughts and emotions that made no sense. Getting them into any semblance of order could take hours. Was he willing to wait that long with her, to sit with her while she tried to come to terms with everything and find the elusive light at the end of the tunnel?

His eyes said that he was.

They were clear and dark, intently focussed on hers. His lips held a hint of a smile. His hand on her shoulder was gentle but firm.

She nodded, feeling strangely calm inside.

It was a nice feeling. For the first time in what seemed like forever, she felt tranquil and as though she belonged somewhere. Her eyes held Winter’s. She belonged with him, but more than that, she felt she could belong here if she only understood a little more and found the strength to accept this place as her new home.

“We have had a report that a pack is moving this way, seven werewolves in total. They seem to be tracking prey.” Mikael looked at her.

“The leader… erm, alpha… of this pack… is he large with grey and black fur? Scraggly looking,” she said.

Mikael frowned. She shrugged it off, making no apology. Willem was scraggly looking. She didn’t care if Mikael found that term offensive. He hadn’t seen the man. She was sure that some werewolves had beautiful coats, but Willem’s was dull, wiry and, well, scraggly.

“I believe it is the man my lord was informed of, one who declares himself a king of werewolves.”

“King of werewolves?” Nika said and looked at Winter. He was frowning again and just below the surface she could sense his tension rising. His hand went to his sword.

“How far away are they?” Winter said.

“They will reach the border of our territory within a day.”

Nika’s heart picked up pace. Only a day. She had thought it would take longer for Willem to find her. They had been so careful about covering her tracks and keeping her off the ground. Was Willem following more than her scent? What if he could sense her? She didn’t know a lot about werewolves so she didn’t know if it was possible or not. Winter could sense things a long way off. Could Willem sense her in a similar way?

“When they cross the border, we will attack—” Mikael started.

“No,” Winter said, cutting him off. “Leave Willem to me. I will fight him alone.”

Nika stepped forwards and Winter turned to face her.

“We will fight him,” he said and her heart lightened and warmed. For a moment, she had thought he was going to exclude her from the fight. She wanted to be a part of it, even though she didn’t know the first thing about fighting. Even if she could only stand to one side and shout her support, she wanted to be there. “This is our fight.”

Winter turned away from her to face Mikael but her eyes remained fixed on his profile, tracing the noble lines of his features and absorbing how beautiful he looked when he was determined. She wished he could be so determined about being with her, but she was beginning to learn not to push him. Gentle words had been enough to convince him to stay in her bed last night, a confession of the heart that had persuaded him to surrender to his desire. Perhaps such gentle encouragement and persuasion could convince him to stay, or at least return one day. She could wait for him. By the time he returned, she might have gained some status amongst the werewolves here, and they might not react so violently to her relationship with him.

“I brought Nika here so she could be with other werewolves and would be safe when I returned to my lord,” Winter said and she tried to hide the hurt that welled up inside, tearing her apart. He would come back to her. One day. She was sure of it. He had to return for now. His lord had made him take his horse and he needed to return it as promised. “Nika needs to be

216

trained to use her abilities and to control the change. It is something that I cannot help with. There is something I can help with though.”

Something he could help with? She blinked at him in confusion when he looked over his shoulder at her.

“I can teach you to fight.”

Nika keeled over and breathed hard into her knees. When Winter had said that he would teach her to fight, she hadn’t expected him to be so deadly serious. She had imagined a lot of banter and a little fighting. What she had gone through was several hours straight of kicking, punching, dodging and defending. She was dead on her feet.

Sweat dripped into her eye and she wiped it away. Winter stood before her, bare-chested beneath his armour, his sword gripped in both hands, ready to attack. His expression was patient, unhurried, and showed no sign of fatigue. How could he fight for so long without needing a break?

“Can you remember the basics?” he said and she nodded, gasping at air to cool her burning lungs.

She wiped her eyes again and retied her ponytail to keep her hair out of her face. This time, she knotted up her long blonde hair so it was away from her neck too. Winter had neatly tied his dark hair at the nape of his neck, only a strand out of place. He brushed it behind his ear and then tugged on the bottom of his chest plate. She didn’t understand why he could wear armour and she couldn’t. She looked down at herself, at the small black t-shirt and jogging bottoms that a woman had leant her. It seemed strange to be out of Winter’s clothes. The oversized black shirt had been comfortable. The t-shirt she had been given was tight and revealing, making her self-conscious. It did have one advantage. It seemed to draw Winter’s attention and every time he looked at her, his eyes lit up with hunger. Perhaps she would be able to convince him to come to bed with her again today.