Windburn (The Elemental Series #4) (26 page)

I turned my head so I could look into Ash’s eyes. “I do not see this ending well.”

He kissed me gently. “I am with you, Lark. From now until whatever the end holds for us.”

The warmth from Peta, Ash and the fire lulled me into a fog. Despite the fact that I’d been locked up for two years, I was exhausted. I fell asleep, truly warm in both body and spirit.

Child, welcome home.

I was on my feet in an instant, rage burning hotter than the fire at my back. “You miserable whore! You knew I was locked away and you left me when I needed you most!” My voice cracked, but not with tears.

Ash and Peta stared up at me, their eyes wide. My whole body shook and the earth shook around us, trembling as though it too were afraid of me. Or maybe it felt my anger and agreed with me. Peta shifted into her leopard form and slunk toward my feet.

“Lark, calm yourself. Please.”

“No. The mother goddess left me in there to rot as much as Cassava and Raven.” I paced in front of the fire. A slow rolling fog misted over the ground, curling up my legs.

I spun and stared into the dark jungle. “You dare show yourself to me now? NOW?”

Distantly, I knew I was out of control. That some little piece of madness had claimed me.

The mother goddess, though, was no fool. In the guise of my mother, she ghosted toward us. “Child, I could not find you any more than Ash or Peta. That is the power of the oubliette. It blocks all from knowing it.”

“You saw them put me in. You had to know.” I strode toward her, not caring that she was the mother goddess, or that she looked like my mother with her straight white blonde hair and blue eyes. Those eyes flashed.

“You are not my only charge, Larkspur. Others have need of me.”

“You said I was your chosen one, and so you’d leave me to fight for my life.” All the questions I’d pondered while hidden from the world bubbled up. “Did you feel me dying?”

Her eyes flicked away, so fast I almost missed it. I shoved her hard enough to send her onto her ass in a most un-goddess like sprawl. She gaped up at me, shock written in every line of her face. “How dare you?”

Behind me, Ash let out a moan. “Don’t do this, Lark. Please.”

Peta stepped beside me, pressing her body tightly to mine. “You felt her dying and you left her to die. Didn’t you?”

I dropped a hand to Peta and tears sprang to my eyes. At least there was one I could count on. Blinking, I stared at the mother goddess. “Do you wish my death then? Is that what this is? Some twisted way to see me dead? Perhaps Cassava is the one you wanted on the throne all along.”

My words didn’t make sense, not even to me. But they were every fear I’d fought for the last two years. Every doubt, every insecurity, every realization and every hope.

The mother goddess folded her legs under her and spread her pale blue gown around her as though she were the center of a flower. “Sit, Larkspur. Sit.”

I wanted to take my spear and run her through, but instead I sat and folded my legs. Peta lay to my right, but the tension in her body told me everything. She didn’t trust the mother goddess either.

Ash stepped up behind me, but didn’t sit. “I will stand with you, Lark. Even against her.”

I swallowed hard past the lump that grew in my throat. “No. This . . . this is between her and me.”

I tapped my fingers on my knee.

Peta let out a soft growl. “Griffin calls her Viv.”

The mother goddess jerked. “That is fine. Call me Viv.” I knew without her saying so that Viv was short for something else. Not that it mattered. Nothing mattered except this moment.

“Well, Viv. What do you want to tell me?”

She closed her eyes and her image shifted to that of a woman I’d met in my testing. Her long brown hair was the color of mineral-rich soil, and her eyes spun with all the colors found in nature. “You have only met one side of me, Lark. There are two sides to nature, and as such, there are two sides to my personality. I cannot dictate when one is in charge.”

I leaned back, pressing my body against Ash’s legs. “Two.”

“Yes. As there is beauty and light in this world, so is there darkness and death. I cannot tell you what the dark side of me is up to. She is completely blocked from me.”

“What does it matter that you have two sides?” Ash asked.

“Because without realizing it, she is playing Blackbird and me against one another. Aren’t you?” The understanding came hard and fast.

She tipped her head and a tear fell.

“I believe so. I can only guess, because I have no memory of what I do when the darkness takes me. I do what I can to hold up the precepts of light—”

“Cut the goose shit,” I snapped. “You are the mother goddess. You may have light and dark, we all do. But I will not sit here and listen to you tell me this isn’t your fault. Griffin said it. You’re meddling where you shouldn’t be.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Be careful, Larkspur. A chosen one can fall as easily as she can be raised up.”

I stood and stared down at her, my fists clenched at my sides. I had a plan, I just didn’t know how smart it was. “Perhaps then I’d be better off to side with your darker half. Perhaps she would see the value in me, the worth I hold.”

Viv’s eyes widened with understanding a split second before they rolled back. She tipped her head back and laughed, a long, low laugh that sent a chill racing up and down my spine.

“Oh, I like you more and more, little Lark.” Her head snapped forward and as she stood, her hair darkened to a blue-black as her eyes lightened. A haunting silver blinked back at me. “You wanted to speak to me.”

“You are working with Cassava and Blackbird.”

“You mean Raven?”

“No. My brother is dead to me. I mean Blackbird.”

Her lips twitched. “Fine. Yes, they are my chosen ones. Chaos, Lark. That is all the world understands. And even while you try to patch up the messes I’ve created, as you try to put better leaders into the families, you cause chaos. I think you are right. I think you would be better off with me at your back. I would have saved you.”

I took a step back, and Peta and Ash moved with me. “Then why didn’t you come to save Blackbird? I had him in my hands, his life was draining.”

Her eyes narrowed. “How could we save our two chosen ones at the same time?”

Without moving, I reached out with my connection to the earth, the flood of strength buoying me up. The mother goddess raised an eyebrow. “You wish to fight me?”

“No.” I raised my left hand and pointed with two fingers at the oubliette. Vines snaked out from the jungle, forking like snake tongues. They grabbed at the opening of the oubliette and wrenched it apart with a violent tear. “Stay away from me. Both of you. I will chose my path from now on.”

With a second flick of my hand I sent the vines to her and scooped her up. She laughed. “You think to hurt me?”

I raised an eyebrow. “Ever hear of a slingshot?”

Her eyes widened and she let out a screech as I pulled the vines toward me, then sent them flinging away at a speed my eyes couldn’t follow.

“I can’t believe you flung the mother goddess through the jungle.” Ash put a hand on my arm, turning me to him. “Remind me never to get on your bad side.” He smiled and I burst into tears. He caught me against his chest, murmuring into my hair over and over. “Easy, Lark. Easy.”

A thump of dirt spun us around and I stared up into the wingspan of the only Pegasus in the world. Shazer stuffed his nose into my chest and breathed me in. “It’s about fucking time you showed up.”

I held his face for a moment and kissed his nose. “I missed you too.” He snorted, but I was already looking past him to the man who slid off his back. Cactus had aged in the two years I’d been gone. His body was harder, his face no longer open as it had been.

Yet in the glimmer of his green eyes, I still saw the boy who’d stolen my heart while we’d played in the forest.

“Cactus.”

He caught me up in his arms and I clung to him. Ash put a hand on my back, Peta pressed against my leg, and Shazer hooked his neck around us.

I clung to them all, knowing they would help me fight the darkness that had found me in the oubliette. They had to.

Because without them, I had no doubt I would lose my mind.

he fire crackled hot as the others slept. But I could not close my eyes to the sky above me, the view of the stars and the feel of the earth below me. Touching my power was like opening a conduit I’d never understood.

It was strength and freedom. It was my life.

I stood and crept away from the fire, leaving Peta curled with Ash and Cactus asleep only a few feet from where they lay.

“Sneaking away?” Shazer asked as I reached the edge of the tight clearing. I reached up and ran a hand over his back.

“No.”

He was quiet a moment, and the night air lay heavy on my shoulders. Or maybe that was the responsibilities that crashed down around me the second I’d stepped out of the oubliette.

“You know, I never wanted to be tied to an elemental. You’re all bastards.” He pawed at the earth with a front hoof. “Yet here I am tied to you.”

“Still? I thought you came with Cactus out of friendship.” I kept my hand on his back, taking comfort in his nearness.

“No. The mother goddess made it clear I am to fly with you until she dictates.”

So. He was doing what he had to, too.

We weren’t close like Peta and I. Maybe that was why I could open up to him. There was no emotional bond, no worry I’d freak him out.

“I’ve always held back, Shazer. Always. Fear, for the most part. But also the expectations of being a good girl. Of being what my father wants. Of what is expected of me.”

“We all have that moment.” He shook his head. “Question is . . . what are you going to do about it?”

“Subtle,” I said.

“I’m all about the finer points of dialogue.”

I looked into the night sky, as if the answers would be written there, clear for me to see. Variables spun out—Bella, my father, Blackbird, and Cassava. But there were only so many things I could do. And only a few of them were essential.

“Cassava needs to die and my father needs to name his heir. Then I can be free of this.”

“Free? Would you not go back to your home?”

I shook my head. Aria’s words from so long ago echoed in my heart. “The Rim is not my home. My home is here, with you and Peta. With Ash and Cactus. That is where I bloom.”

He butted me lightly. “Then you have your answer. I will fly you to wherever you wish. Will it be the Eyrie then, to find a trace of your father? Or to the Rim to confront Cassava?”

I closed my eyes and for a moment I felt as though the oubliette was around me. I reached out and grabbed his mane, leaning into him, breathing the scent of sweet grass and horse sweat into my lungs, allowing it to center me. There was a tug on my soul, like a thread tied to me that I could not deny.

I lifted my head and stared into the jungle. I recognized the touch of her ability as she Tracked me.

A part of me knew I shouldn’t have been surprised. I’d sensed she would need me before I was stuffed away from the world.