Wilson Mooney Eighteen at Last (22 page)

Max ran his fingers across
his temple as he tugged his hair away from his bottomless, green
eyes. I was
so
caught in his web. He could devour me and there was nothing I
would do to stop him. I couldn’t flutter free or escape the trance
he had over me.

I felt him lean against me. His lips
were soft and scrumptious as we tasted what I’d always known from
the first time we kissed—I was his entirely.

He dragged the covers down, slowly
exposing me to the room’s temperature. His eyes, thirsty, drank
from my body.

“
You are unbelievable.
Mmmm, I wanna live here with you.” He pressed his lips just above
my navel before he slid upward. “And here,” he added as he pressed
his mouth against my breast. For that moment the world outside his
room didn’t exist.

I felt my body answer his requests. My
stomach twirled and crashed down in my groin. My hands pulled at
his hair. I wanted to feel him kiss me; to map his way back to my
lips with the tip of his tongue.

The sun scorched through the picture
window, heating my skin, to match the glow he sparked inside
me.

He brushed his lips across my
collarbone as he inhaled, pressing his nose against my neck. At
last he lined up his body even with mine and I could feel him. He
stole my heart and teased my butterflies all at once with his sweet
aroma.

“
Wilson,” his breath
tickled at the curves of my ear. His voice clung to every space in
my body that craved him. I knew that he wanted me as much as I
wanted him.

“
Mmmhum,” I
hummed.

“
Last night
was—incredible.
You
were incredible, you drove me wild.” He pushed his body
tighter against mine and his words spurred flames to dance across
my skin.

“
Really?” I asked
incredulously.

I didn’t mean to question
how extraordinary
he
was last night. What we did was amazingly tender, infinitely
thoughtful, emotionally scary, and ever-evolving; but I didn’t know
to how to react to his words.

He froze, pulling away just enough to
make eye contact with me. “You’re serious? You really don’t
know?”

“
I guess not. I know how
you made me feel last night, and I will never forget it,
ever…”

“
Well, put it this way—I
don’t want to ever have to imagine a moment without you next to me
ever again.”

I felt my butterflies pulsate to his
words as they stroked their wings deep within me.

“
Well, you won’t have to.”
I stretched up to taste him, kiss him, and let him know I felt the
same way. His lips were hot, his tongue exciting, and his
intentions spellbinding. I felt the connections we had last night
beginning to rekindle. Pushing himself against me again, his hands
traveled across my chest and lingered at the curve of my
breasts.

I felt my body give way to what my
mind already knew. I loved him. I felt something inside of me click
and I was hungry for his touch. I literally craved him. Our bodies
began to dance in rhythm again as our mouths found each new
desire.

Kisses kept coming from Max as his
body curled on top of me and his feet pushed my ankles apart. With
his legs in between mine, his hips pressed against the zone where
all my butterflies lingered. It was instinctual for me to push in
and pull away, stroking every desire that swelled within. I felt
his intentions of becoming one with me again when the thought of
what we’d done last night flooded my soul—and in an instant, it
became something different in my eyes.

God—I’m aching to feel him
again. What does that make me? He’s hurting and broken and all I
want is to feel him against me. What’s wrong with me? Was it the
right choice to make love with him? Was it selfish of me to be with
him last night? Were we just using each other to heal all the
pain?

“
Wilson? Where are you?”
Max asked as he caressed my forehead. His eyes were narrow with the
same intense stare he’d given me yesterday.

“
I’m here with you—but
maybe I shouldn’t be.” The words clogged my throat. “Maybe it
wasn’t the best time for—God, I was so single-minded—did I really
take into account how you—how
we
were going to be affected by this?” I wiggled out
from under him. I felt like I’d used him; maybe even that we’d used
each other. Not that we didn’t love each other or that we weren’t
going to make love soon enough, one day. But the night his father
died? Did we do it because we loved each other, or was it to heal
the gaping hole created by the grim reaper snatching such an
important person from his life?

“
What are you talking
about, Wilson? I don’t understand. Everything that
we
did last night—our
connection and the love
we
made—was so much more important to me than you
know. There was nothing to consider for me. I love you.” He grabbed
either side of my head, his hands pressing gently at my ears. “I
wanted you to
feel
how much I love you. Last night, when I made love to you, I
wanted to give you that part of me I’ve shut off to everyone else
in the world.” His eyes widened as he sat up and turned to sit on
the edge of the bed.

A chill rippled through my
body when his touch left my cheeks. The sunlight bounced off his
bronze skin, but his face was pasty with a loss beyond his
realization.
Maybe he feels like I used
him last night.
A moment hung between us
before he mumbled words that I didn’t expect. “You weren’t ready
and now you regret being with me.” He looked over at me, his frothy
green eyes wrecked.

Pain shot across my heart as my mouth
ran dry. I’d done it again. In my selfish attempt to justify the
fucked-up feelings I had swirling in my head, I’d hurt
him.

“
I don’t regret being with
you.” I bent down in front of him, pushing his hair out of his
eyes. “Max, I wanted you so bad and you made me feel so alive, and
so important; but was it fair to you? I wanted to fix you, complete
you, and make you feel whole again. Even if I couldn’t heal you, I
wanted to try. Was it the right thing to do? I don’t know.” My
heart was breaking with what I kept doing to him—first with Mallory
and now this.

“
It felt right to me. I’m
as put together as I will ever be. When I’m with you, I’m exactly
who I am supposed to be.”

“
But was it right to feel
so wonderful on the worst day of your life? Was it okay to forget
about every ounce of your pain while experiencing so much
pleasure?” I hiccupped as I felt the ripples of guilt spread
through my body. Max held my chin as his eyes cased my face. His
lips pulled tight across in a straight line before they curved up
into a sincere smile.

“
Yes, it was perfect. You
took me to a place where I didn’t have to worry about being healed
or fixed. It wasn’t about that. We experienced something nobody
will ever be able to touch or take away. What you gave me I will
cherish for as long as I live.” His eyes glazed with the hope that
he’d convinced me with his brave words.

I slid up into his arms, pushing him
back onto the bed. Our skin, still cold from being apart,
reconnected with a new eagerness. I melted in his touch, yet froze
in his embrace. He was right—it wasn’t about anyone or anything we
had to do to forget about all the pain, it was about giving each
other the most sacred part of our souls.

“
I love you,” I whispered
lightly into his neck. I felt his hands refresh their grip across
my back as he pulled me tighter against his chest.

“
Me too,” he
answered.

I felt Max shift his body as he got up
and held out his arm to me. When I didn’t move he shook his hand
and said “I need to take a shower. I want you to take one with
me.”

I lay there staring at his beautifully
sculptured body—muscles thick and defined under his skin,
complexion so scorching hot my hands ran damp, and sensual green
eyes so encouraging they could hypnotize me into doing just about
anything he’d ask. How could I not want to watch the water cascade,
bounce, roll, and shimmer across every inch of his body?

I gulped extra loudly before I reached
out and accepted his hand. He pulled me into his arms, our bodies
still naked, our eyes still captivated by each other. His arms
swallowed me into his heat.

He opened a door adjacent to his
bedroom and led me into his unbelievable bathroom. The walls were
treated with a textured suede in a shade of forest green. Plush
burgundy towels hung from contemporary aged brass racks
accentuating the size of his etched glass double shower. Two
massive showerheads were suspended from the light cocoa-colored
ceiling. Brown granite, rich with earthen greens, spread from the
entry all the way up the walls without stopping. I pressed my feet
into the burgundy shag rug and enjoyed my view of the muscles in
Max’s back, stretching and constricting as he pulled on the water.
He cupped the sprinkling water as it overflowed and cascaded across
his wrist and forearm. The sound of the water rhythmically
exploding against the granite evoked an urge in me to feel the
warmth of the water roll across my own skin. In no time, steam
built, swirling around his body before rising up.

“
You like it hot, right?”
he asked as his eyes dropped low and the edge of his smile
rose.

“
Yeah, real hot,” I
whispered.

He stepped into the stream and I
watched the water swallow him from his head down to his toes. His
black hair lengthened around his ears and across his eyes before he
tilted his head back and pushed his hair off his face. Streams of
water tangled in his eyebrows and then rolled down across his nose
and mouth as he parted his lips, letting the water trickle in. I
stared as the shower drowned his shoulders, chest, and stomach
before dripping down between his legs. I felt my nipples tighten
and my groin ripple as Max grabbed my hand and pulled me into a
kiss. I felt the water wash over my body, dripping from the edges
of my ears, nose, and chin. I felt the water hurry down my spine
and chest, water falling from the tips of my nipples and the curve
of my rear. My skin escalated to meet the temperature of the hot
water as it danced across my stomach and rushed down to the spaces
in between.

Max pulled me closer and the water
cocooned us. With his lips near my ear, I could hear the water flow
over his mouth as he spoke in a raspy, grinding voice.

“
Oh babe, you’re so hot.”
His arms pressed heavily across my shoulders as his body tightened
and he pushed his hard length below my navel. I slipped my hands
past the small of his back and down to his rear; I wanted to feel
his muscles tighten beneath my fingers the next time he thrust his
hips against mine.

“
How hot?” I huffed and
teased before running my tongue down to his chest to suck his
nipple.

“
Oh so fucking hot,” he
growled as he slid his hand down my stomach, pressing his fingers
between my legs and biting my lip between his teeth as he kissed
me.

I lost my breath. Without waiting I
grabbed him and began slowly stroking. My desire to feel him inside
me grew low in my body. I felt the love between us as he massaged
me. I wanted to melt into it. He was taking me to a point of no
return.

“
Hold on, wait, I don’t
want to—aahhh,” he grimaced as he pulled himself away from my
grasp. He blew out a couple of fast breaths and raised his head
into the water—anything he could do to stop from
exploding.

I felt the space between us ripple
with a chill, but the hot water that splashed between us drowned
it. My body was vibrating, surging with every beat of my heart,
every breath I tried to take, and every drop of water that rolled
down my skin.

Max spun away and pressed his hands
against the granite wall, still trying to regain his composure as
the shower splashed and cascaded down his backside. Attempting to
collect the spastic butterflies in my gut, I wrapped my arms around
my stomach and raised my face to the other showerhead pulsing water
steadily from the ceiling above.

I followed the water that danced down
his bronzed skin. All I needed was to be his partner, the other
half of the whole we created together. The events of last night
flashed through my mind. I thought about what he felt like in my
body, how he filled every empty space within me, and I couldn’t
keep away anymore. I pressed my chest against his back and slid my
hands across his stomach and up to his pecs. As I pushed my lips to
the space between his shoulder blades, the water parted where my
mouth clung to him. I let my teeth graze delicately across his
skin. He swung his arm around my back but couldn’t find his grip,
so he swept around and swayed against me. With his knees bent, his
mouth followed the line of my neck and his hands clung to the back
of my thighs. My feet left the floor as Max lifted me and pushed me
up against the shower wall. I gasped as a chill licked and bit at
the spots where my back met the granite. I linked my legs around
Max’s hips. His hands still clinging to the back of my thighs, I
felt him waiting to enter. My body arched for him, pressing to let
him fill me.