Willow Smoke (73 page)

“Hard
on
both
of
us,”
Daisy
admitted.
She’d
miss
his
arms
clutching
her
to
him
or
his
hand
lazily
patting
her
buttocks
in
the
middle
of
the
night.
Familiarity.
She’d
grown
accustomed
to
that.
Too
accustomed.

“Good.
But
part
of
romance
may
include
touching
and
even
kissing.”

It was her turn to
smile. “Yes, if I agree.”

“So
what
do
you
think?
Do
you
have
anything
else
to
offer
at
the
moment?”

She
met
his
gaze
steadily.
“I
do
have
an
additional
thought.
We
once
agreed
that
while
seeing
each
other,
we
would
remain
committed,
that is we wouldn’t see other
guys
or
women.
Do
you
still
want
that?”

“I know what committed
means.” His brow
furrowed.
“Do
you
still
want
that?”

“Yes,”
she
squeaked.

“Good,”
he
gasped.
“I
wouldn’t
want
it
any
other way. I’m sure you don’t know how
much
time
you’ll
need.”

Eternity,
maybe.
Daisy
shook
her
head.
“No.”

“I don’t want to put any
more pressure on you, but you do need to know I won’t wait
forever
either.
How
long?
I
don’t
know.”

“That’s
fair,”
Daisy
heard
her
voice
say.
Why couldn’t she stop her hands from
trembling?
“I better go pack my things.”

“You’ll
stay
the
night.”
He
chuckled.
“I
won’t
break the
rules. I promise. There are
at
least
a
half
a
dozen
beds
that
you
can
choose
from.
First
thing
in
the
morning,
I’ll
have a security
team over at your
apartment
installing
a
monitoring
system.”

Daisy
flashed
her
eyebrows
and
nodded.
“Thanks
for
understanding.
I
need
some
breathing
room.”

Nick
stood
and
placed
their
coffee
cups
in
the
sink.
“Don’t
give
me
too
much
credit.” His voice cracked. “I didn’t say I understood. I’m just
not ready to give up on us yet.”

Wanting
to
avoid
displaying
more
tears,
Daisy ran toward the stairs.

Daisy
studied
her
reflection
in
the
mirrors
on
her
bedroom
wall.
It
had
been
a
nerve-wracking
day.
She
looked
as
frazzled
as she felt. She hugged herself. It was
good
to
be
back
in
her
own
space.

She
slipped
into
a
nightshirt
and
knelt
on
the
futon.
Clutching
Bear
to
her
chest,
Daisy
cried
a
new
round
of
tears.
Would
she
ever
stop
crying?
She’d
always
prided
herself
on
not
being
like
those
other
women
who
cried
when
any
little
thing
went wrong. “Oh Bear,” she whispered. “It’s
not
just
a
little
thing.
My
entire
life
is
falling
apart.”

She’d
left
Nick’s
house
before
dawn.
There
was
no
need
for
further
goodbyes,
with
him
or
with
Mrs.
B.
The
security
people
had
already
installed
a
motion
and
sound
system.
Little
red
lights
blinked
at
her
wherever
she
went.
She’d
be
in
more
trouble
if
she
forgot
it
was
on.
Grudgingly,
she
admitted
she
did
feel
safer
in
her
protected
cocoon, but she couldn’t stay inside her apartment forever. And
at some point,
sooner
than
later,
Reggie
would
learn
that
she
was
back.

Daisy
turned
off
the
light
and
crawled
under
the
covers.
With
Bear
tucked
in
the
crook of her arm, she closed her eyes, but
sleep refused to come. “Oh, Bear,” she moaned, “I love you so much. So why do I
feel so bereft, so alone?”

“Ah
Baby,
thanks
for
bringing
by
the
groceries,”
Maxine
said. “I’m getting better
day by day, but it really helps.”

“I’m
glad
I
can
help,”
Daisy
responded,
putting
frozen
foods
away.

Maxine
sat
at
the
kitchen
table
with
a
cup
of cold coffee in front of her and a
cigarette
in
her
hand.
The
ashtray
on
the
table
was
overrun
with
butts.
“I’ll
get
the
rest
later,”
she
said.
“Why
don’t
you
come
and
sit
down
for
a
bit?
You
look
like
you’re
running
yourself
ragged
taking
care
of me and doing your job, too.”

Daisy
poured
herself
a
cup
of
coffee
and
joined
her
sister.
Maxine
was
right;
she
was
fraying
at
the
edges.
It
had
been
a
week
since
she
left
Nick’s
house.
Other
than
the
security
system
installed
in
her
apartment,
there
was
no
evidence
that
he
any
longer
cared
she
existed.
He
hadn’t
been
at
the
track,
and
he
hadn’t
called.

Maybe
he
was
waiting
for
her
to
make
the
first contact; after all, it had been her
idea to move out.

She
stayed
busy.
That
was
the
one
positive
thing
about
Maxine’s
situation:
her
sister filled up time. But that wouldn’t last.
She’d have to take care of herself pretty
soon.
“So
how
are
you
doing,
Maxine?”

“I’m
coming
along.
Tired
as
hell
of
staring
at
these
walls.
I’ve
always
known
this
was
a
small
place,
but
it’s
beginning
to
feel
like
a
cell.
It
will
be
good
to
get
back
to
work just to see some people.”

“I suppose. Guess I’m
more of a natural recluse than you.”

Maxine
stubbed
a
cigarette
in
the
ashtray.
“I don’t know about you,” she
huffed,
“but
I
need
people
around
me.
I
need
to
hear
stories
and
laughter.
Even
bad
jokes
are
better
than
none.”
She
smiled
at
Daisy.
“You’d
be
surprised
the
jokes
people
tell
waitresses.
Particularly
men.”

Daisy
shook
her
head.
She
didn’t
really
want
to
hear
about
jokes
or
men
who
bantered
with
women.
“So
when
do
you
expect
to get back to the café?”

“I’ve
talked
with
the
boss.
I’ll
give
it
a
try
week after next. It might be only a half a
shift at first.” Maxine lit another
cigarette.
“I’m
surprised
Scooter
is
willing
to
be
that
flexible.
Usually,
it’s
his
way
or
the
highway.”

Maxine
lowered
her
long
fake
eyelashes.
Her
sister
was
hiding
something.
While
Maxine
was
a
heavy
smoker,
Daisy
seldom
saw
her
smoke
one
cigarette
after
another.

“Oh,
I
meant
to
tell
you,”
Maxine
began,
catching
Daisy’s
eye
and
then
looking
away,
“Reggie
was
by
last
night.”

All
of
Daisy’s
senses
went
on
alert.
“Oh?”

“Yes,
it
was
so
good
to
see
him.
He’s
been
very
busy,
you
know.
That’s
why
he
wasn’t
by
at
the
hospital
or
here
sooner.
Some important contacts had a job for
him—out of town.” Maxine drew a last puff
from
a cigarette before grinding it
to bits
in
the
ashtray.
“He
had
to
leave
again.”
She
smiled
wistfully.
“But
he
did
manage
to stay most of the night.”

Daisy
closed
her
eyes.
Maxine
was
trying
to
hide
more
than
the
fact
that
Reggie
had
been
by.
Her
sister
was
back
on
drugs.
The
hospital
stay
had
been
hard
for
Maxine.
The
hospital
might
have
just
replaced
one
drug
with
another.
And
the
last
week
or
so,
Maxine
was
ready
to
jump
out
of
her
skin
on
some
days
and
then
mellowed
out
on
others.
She’d
found
a
supplier
to
tide her over, but now her main
man
was
back.