Wild Dakota Heart (3 page)

“Don’t follow me, Ethan. I’m not Denny’s little kid sister anymore. I’m not going to follow in your shadow and I don’t want you following me.”

With both of the car door’s ajar, Ethan sat in the driver’s seat and watched Maddie rush to the door of her condo. The only thing he could hear was the sudden rush of blood storming through his veins and his heart hammering in his chest.

He’d done this to her. No one else. People say time heals all wounds. But Maddie’s wounds were as fresh as the day he’d stood in her living room and told Denny’s family that Denny was dead. He’d stayed away because he thought it would be easier for all of them. And now he knew for sure that he’d been wrong. And he had no idea how to even begin to make it right.

# # #

He pulled into the parking lot of MW Oil, the company his family had founded and where his father still worked. Maddie had accused him of playing the hero. Well, hero wasn’t a word he’d ever used when describing himself. None of the Navy SEALs on the team he’d had the privilege of working with did. But it still surprised him when others used that word associated with him. Especially in his home town of Rudolph where he left for the Navy over ten years ago as anything but a hero.

The normally warm summer weather had settled into a cool day thanks to the cloudy sky that covered the sun. The light rain shower that had caught him off guard earlier had stopped a few minutes ago, but the strong smell of moisture and wet earth still hung heavy in the air. As he pulled into a parking space and stepped out of his SUV, Ethan could still see steam rising from the ground, caused by the rain hitting the hot pavement.

He stepped out of the car and sat on the curb under a shady tree with his legs stretched out drinking the cup of hot coffee he’d picked up at the diner before coming over. He’d been to MW Oil at least a hundred times in his lifetime. He’d never been nervous about walking inside. But then, Maddie Newton wasn’t sitting behind a desk just inside that door.

Ethan had spent most of the night walking the floor until his father finally came downstairs. Unlike when he was a teenager, getting caught for sneaking into the house after a night of fun, Don McKinnon didn’t yell. He was concerned. But he didn’t ask any questions beyond how his day was before getting a glass of water and urging him to go to bed. Even when Ethan finally crawled under the cool sheets in his room, sleep eluded him, and he was paying for it today.

He couldn’t get the words Maddie had said to him the other night out of his mind. She meant what she’d said at Denny’s funeral. She never wanted to see him again. That was her choice and for years Ethan had respected that.

But no more.

During the long hours of the night he realized that Maddie was right. Not about him forgetting Denny. Ethan couldn’t possibly forget their friendship, or how Denny died. But he had escaped his grief in the military. Being in the military and then becoming a Navy SEAL had taken all his focus. He didn’t have time to dwell on what he couldn’t change and he didn’t have a constant reminder of how he’d failed. He focused on not failing for the sake of his SEAL team and the special ops they’d done.

But Maddie was left here to grieve every day. The only difference between her and her parents is that they’d finally found a way to live again. After seeing Maddie yesterday, it was clear to Ethan that she hadn’t. But he was going to change that. Even if it killed him.

* * *

“I was wondering if I could have an extra hour or so off for lunch,” Maddie said, standing in Don McKinnon’s office while he signed papers that needed to be mailed today. “My car is fixed. George is closing the garage early today to go to his nephew’s Bar Mitzvah and I want to pick it up before he leaves. I hope that won’t be a problem, Mr. McKinnon.”

Don McKinnon sighed as he leaned back in his leather chair, shaking his head. “I’ve told you since the day you started working at MW Oil that you don’t have to call me Mr. McKinnon. You’re making me feel ancient.”

Maddie smile sheepishly. “Old habits die hard. My whole life you’ve always been Mr. McKinnon. I guess it’s going to take more than a few months to get used to it. But I will try my best to work on it.”

“Why don’t you take the rest of the afternoon off?”

She raised an eyebrow. “No, I just need to pick up my car.”

“You didn’t even take a day off after you had the accident. It’s a nice day. Maybe you and Ethan can find something fun to do. He’s been brooding for the last few days.”

“Ethan?”

Don glanced up and handed her a stack of papers. She gave him a new set to sign. “I know there’s some bad blood between you because of what happened to your brother,” he said, signing and shuffling the next round of papers she handed him.

Maddie shrunk a little where she stood.

Don stopped writing and looked up. “I’m sorry. I know it’s sometimes hard to talk about a loved one, even when they’ve been gone a long time.”

Tears filled her eyes, but she knew Don was referring to his eldest son, Wade, who was presumed lost at sea during a tsunami that hit the Asian island he’d been working on several years ago.

“It’s okay.”

“Take the afternoon off. You deserve it.”

A few minutes later, Maddie walked down the hallway, slipping her purse high on her shoulder. As practical as her little car was, she was happy to finally be getting it back after the few days without it. George had given her a sweet deal on repairing the radiator and body damage. And he’d turned the work around in a matter of days which meant she could drive again and not rely on being driven.

Denny had taught her how to drive when she was only fifteen, right before she’d begged her mother for legitimate lessons. And Denny had died before Maddie had received her license. She never got the pleasure of thrusting her new paper license in her brother’s face and hearing him rib her about how the roads will never be safe again now that she was driving. Yet every time she backed out of the driveway or out of a parking spot, she remembered how Denny told her to sit her arm at the back of her seat as she backed out, making sure the area was clear before she put her foot on the gas.

As she pushed through the front door of the building, Maddie thought of the irony. She hadn’t allowed herself to visit those memories in years, and yet, so many of those good times seem to flood her mind lately. Denny’s warm smile. Denny and Ethan laughing out in the yard. Camping trips with her family. She remembered everything.

As the sunshine hit her face, she froze on the top step of the walkway and stared out into the parking lot.

Ethan was leaning against his SUV holding a Styrofoam cup in his hand, smiling at her in a way that melted her heart. She cringed with embarrassment just thinking about the way she used to hang on his every move when she was a kid.

When she reached the parking lot, she said, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were stalking me.”

“So call the police,” Ethan said smiling wider.

“Very funny. What part of ‘I don’t want to see you’ didn’t you get?”

“This is official police business.”

She glanced at Ethan, trying not to hold his gaze. She narrowed her eyes, just enough to attempt to discern the situation happening in front of her.

“You need to look these over and sign them,” Ethan said, breaking her out of her trance. There were papers in his hands. When she peered closer, she saw the official police station seal on the top.

“What’s this?”

“The report I wrote up about the accident. I want to make sure I didn’t miss any details that will be problematic with your insurance company. The way people are getting denied for claims around here, you can never be too careful.”

“When do you need this back?”

“I need to file it today.”

“I need to pick up my car at George’s before he closes.”

“I’ll drive you.”

She shook her head. “Look, I appreciate all your help the other night, but that won’t be necessary. My mother is coming to pick me up.”

“No, she’s not.”

“What do you mean? What did you do?”

“I called her and told her I had police business with you, so I offered to pick you up myself.”

“What is it with you? You’re like a mosquito that I can’t swat away.”

Ethan placed his hand over his heart in mock distress. “That hurt.”

“Get over it.”

“I prefer to think of myself as determined.”

“I prefer not to think of you at all,” she said, rummaging through her purse for her cell phone. She found it and quickly dialed her home phone number, then listened.

“She’s not home.”

“Who?”

“Your mother. Since I told her I’d pick you up, she said she was going to head out to Rapid City again to do some shopping for your aunt who just got out of the hospital.”

Her mouth gaped open. “You’re too much.”

“It’s a ride, Maddie. No big deal.”

“You expect me to believe that?”

“I don’t really care if you believe it. That’s what it is. Do you want a ride to the garage or do we look over the paperwork here in the parking lot and you call a cab. Your choice.”

“I never like any of your choices.”

She stared at the paperwork in Ethan’s hand, and remembered the feel of his hand taking hers as she climbed out of her wrecked car a few days ago. He had callouses and cuts from working hard, which surprised her at the time, but now made sense given what Hawk had told her about Ethan wanting to fix up that old Nolan farmhouse.

She grabbed the paperwork from Ethan’s hand. “I’ll read them while you drive.”

“You get car sick when you read in the car.”

She stopped walking and glanced at him. He remembered. “So?”

“So I don’t want you to throw up on me.”

“I’ll roll down the window.”

Ethan smiled the most amazing way that had her heart hammering in her chest like it used to do when she was a teenager. She hated it. She didn’t want to remember those days with Ethan and Denny. She didn’t want to like anything about Ethan. She just wanted to forget.

Ethan’s SUV was parked in a visitor’s parking space near the front of the building. It was only then that it dawned on her that he wasn’t wearing his police uniform. Instead he wore a dark gray T-shirt and jeans.

“Official police business?”

Ethan shrugged but his unabashed expression was unapologetic. “It’s my day off.”

She grunted with frustration and yanked the passenger side door open. To her relief, he gunned the engine and pulled out of the parking lot without saying another word. She took that opportunity to bury her head in the paperwork he’d handed her. But although the words were right in front of her, Maddie found she couldn’t concentrate on them enough to read what they said.

She just wanted to pick up her car and go home. She didn't care about her car insurance company taking care of the repair costs. She’d pay George herself and forget about the insurance reimbursement. She blinked as she looked at the papers until a stinging sensation started to burn the corners of her eyes.

“Do you need a pen to sign it?”

“Ah, no. I have one. This looks fine.”

Maddie’s hands trembled as she rummaged through her purse in search of a pen. Frustrated with finding nothing, she pulled the zipper closed.

“Check the glove compartment.”

“I’ll wait.”

She kept her eyes on the moving scenery out the window as they drove down the familiar road. Ethan had his window open and was resting his arm on the door. His short crop hair was barely touched by the wind flying through the window. Strands of her hair whipped in her face.

“Is this bothering you?” Ethan asked.

There was a whole lot bothering her. She just shook her head.

“You used to laugh a lot.”

Pulling the hair away from her face, she said, “What?”

“That’s what I always remembered the most about you when I was away. You used to find amusement in the oddest things and you laughed like you didn’t care if anyone else got what you were laughing about.”

“You thought about me?”

He glanced at her quickly. “Of course. I missed Rudolph and everyone back home. You used to twirl your hair between your fingers when we sat in your front yard. You never sat Indian style. You always sat on the grass with both legs either stretched out in front of you or to your side. And you sipped your soda. I could drink three cans of soda before you even finished one.”

She always burped when she drank soda too fast. If Ethan wasn’t around, she didn’t care. But she was too self-conscious to do it when she was with him.

Maddie looked out the window at the scenery disappearing as they passed, then back at Ethan. With his eyes focused on the road ahead, she could see his strong profile clearly. Her eyes traced along his broad-set jaw, catching the curves of long sloping nose and lips. Heat crawled up her face.

He’d thought of her.
Somehow that had never crossed her mind.

“So?”

“So nothing. I just noticed. You haven’t laughed once since I’ve seen you.”

His expression was wistful, as if her emotional state bothered him. But Maddie found it hard to believe that Ethan would even care about how she’d been feeling today or any other day.

“Maybe it’s the company.”

“Ouch. You don’t hold back at all. You never used to be this mean to me.”

She chuckled at his reaction and fought to quickly hide it. But the wide smile that split his face told her she’d been caught.

“There. Isn’t that better?”

“Better than what?”

“I don’t know. Just better. That’s the first time I’ve seen you smile since…I don’t know when.”

Maddie rolled her eyes. “I was in a car accident, Ethan. What was there to smile about?”

“George was able to fix your car.”

“Okay, you’ve got me there. But despite what you think, life’s not a bunch of laughs all the time.”

His expression grew grim. “You don’t have to tell me that. I see enough of it all the time.”

She turned her attention to him, but remained silent.