Wholehearted (6 page)

“I’ve been trying to figure that out myself.”

“And?”

“I dunno.”

Lucas shrugged, the answer seeming to be satisfactory for now.

“I like graphic novels,” Lucas offered at last.

“Like comic books?”

“No. Like graphic novels.”

“What’s the difference?”

Lucas rolled his eyes again and huffed loudly. Declan thought he must have pretty good ocular muscle definition from all the eye rolling going on.

“Comic books are usually just part of a story. Graphic novels cover the entire story all in one book, so you don’t have to buy multiple books just to finish the story. Comics are usually for younger kids, where graphic novels, at least the ones I’ve read, are for adults. There is sex and violence and they are just way better overall.”

“I see. Sounds interesting. What’s your favorite one?”

“I dunno. It changes all the time. Last one I can remember liking was
Son of the Silent
.”

“What’s it about?”

“About this guy that was born in a necropolis, and he was just left there. He was taken in and raised by the spirits of the dead that were buried there. Since he was surrounded by the supernatural from when he was a little kid, even though he’s older now, he’s still able to see them. Now he lives in this big city where everyone is blind to what goes on around him, and he keeps the balance between good and evil spirits. He fights evil spirits and sends them back to hell.”

Lucas’s eyes were bright. Declan could feel the excitement rolling off him. “That sounds pretty cool actually.”

“Yeah, I haven’t finished reading it yet, but so far it’s awesome. I’m about halfway through I think.”

“The next time I’m in a book store I’ll pick up a copy and try it out.”

“You should,” Lucas said.

Declan felt like Lucas was actually opening up to him a little. It felt good. Not so much like they were bonding, but more like Lucas didn’t rate spending time with him at the same level on the fun scale as having a colonic performed with lemon juice and turpentine.

Progress.

T
HE
NEXT
day, Declan was on day shift, so he wasn’t able to make it to the hospital until after work. By the time he arrived, visiting hours were just wrapping up, but the nurses hadn’t seemed to care about him overstaying his welcome. He was sure that was because of Kathy, and he silently thanked the plucky nurse.

This time when he walked into Lucas’s room, he was greeted with a different kind of attitude. Rather than being pissed off that Declan was still bothering him, Lucas actually looked marginally glad to see him.

“I thought you’d be here hours ago.”

“I had to work” was all the explanation Declan offered. He hadn’t added that he had taken a change of clothes to the station so that he could change without going all the way home first.

“Oh.” Lucas sat up a little straighter and tried to see what Declan was carrying. “What’s in the bag?”

“Books.”

“Books?”

Declan dug the duplicate copies out of the green plastic bag and tossed one onto Lucas’s lap.

“
Son of the Silent
? You bought this for me?”

“And for me. It sounded good, and you’re still prisoner in here for another night, so I thought you could catch up from where you left off.”

Lucas didn’t say anything for a moment, just sat there staring at the dark cover. “That was really nice of you. Thanks.”

Declan tried to hide the excited grin that was trying to burst free. Go figure that the guy busted his balls for saving his life, but spending seven bucks on a book got his gratitude.

“You’re welcome.” Declan placed his copy on the table and pulled his chair up next to Lucas’s bed again. It was becoming more and more habitual to be in this spot, to be close to this man. As much as he hated hospitals, Declan was going to be a little sad when they discharged Lucas. It had only been a few days, but they had fallen into a routine of sorts. Declan would show up at the hospital, Lucas would scowl and act surly, Declan would sidle up beside him in the garishly bright vinyl chair, Lucas would pretend to ignore him, and they would sit together for a while before conversation slowly began to unfold between them.

Lucas had opened up more than Declan thought he would, and he was grateful for that. Not that any of the information he gleaned would actually be helpful in solving the case, but it was helpful in allowing Declan to get to know him.

“Anything good on tonight?”

“Not really. They’re playing a repeat of a zombie movie on the space channel. I guess because it’s getting pretty close to Halloween, all the monster movies are on.”

“You like monster movies?”

“Some of them.”

“You wanna watch the zombie one?”

“Are you staying a while?”

“I can stay as long as you like.”

“Are you working tomorrow?”

“Night shift. I should try to stay up late tonight to adjust.”

Lucas nodded. That was all the reason in the world Declan needed to make the decision to spend one last night sleeping upright in that fucking awful chair. He didn’t know what would happen in the morning when Lucas was released. He had offered to have him come and stay, but the offer had been thrown right back at him. Several days had passed since then, but Declan didn’t want to bring it up again, not when they were finally getting along. Instead, he resigned himself to sitting on pins and needles, imagining every possible scenario as he watched people’s guts get ripped open and devoured on TV. He would just have to be patient, something Declan had never been particularly good at.

D
ECLAN
WOKE
a few hours later to yet another stiff neck and the room cast in an eerie glow from the TV. The signal had long since faded, and the neon rainbow tinted the room a sickly green color. Lucas was asleep, his head tilted back and his lips parted slightly. He was beautiful even in the green light. His hair was sticking up all over the place, and his eyelashes created dark fans on his smooth cheeks. The days without shaving had given rise to light-colored stubble that covered his jaw. Declan stood and walked closer, taking in Lucas’s sleeping form. He just wanted to touch him, so very badly. Just once. He reached out and brushed Lucas’s hair across his forehead, smoothing it back into place. Lucas made a soft noise and turned his head, leaning into Declan’s touch. He fought the urge to lean down and kiss him. He knew that if Lucas woke up, he would lose all the progress he’d made.

Declan flicked off the TV and sat back down, sliding his hands underneath his thighs. He wouldn’t touch him again unless Lucas needed him to. He could control himself. He was a grown man; he should be able to control his impulses. He sighed, knowing that he was lying to himself, and tried to go back to sleep.

M
ORNING
CAME
before he knew it and the nurse was coming in to deliver Lucas’s breakfast.

“Oh wow, another plate of dry-as-fuck eggs. Fantastic,” Lucas said sarcastically after the nurse had left the room.

“Is the food no good here?”

Lucas tilted his head and gave him a disapproving stare. “What the fuck do you think? Have you ever had hospital food? It’s bullshit.”

“I’ve snuck a couple of bagels and muffins from the coffee shop, but I’ve been too afraid to venture into the cafeteria. You should eat, though. You need the calories.”

Lucas looked underfed. Declan could see his collarbones protruding prominently above where the hospital gown fell across his chest. The smooth skin stretched over them made him hungry, and not for dry-as-fuck eggs. He’d been teased and tortured spending time with Lucas. Every time Lucas got up out of bed, the gown would bunch and gape, giving Declan glimpses of smooth skin over taut muscle. He wanted to rip the thin cotton off his body and run his hands over every rise and valley.

After breakfast, the nurse came back in to take Lucas down for blood tests and X-rays. Declan stayed in his room and waited while he was gone, cracking open the book he had bought and reading the first few pages.

Lucas was right; it was pretty good. Reading the captions and speech bubbles took some getting used to, as Declan had never been one for comic books as a kid, but the story was pretty enthralling, and having the imagery right there on the page made the story more intense.

Lucas was gone for less than an hour before they wheeled him back into the room, and then it was even more waiting, until Dr. Pryce finally arrived just before noon.

“How are we feeling today, Mr. Hale?”

“Way better.”

“Good. Your X-rays look good, it looks like everything is healing nicely. There’s no sign of infection or complications from the surgery. You’ll need someone to help you, but you are free to leave us today.”

Declan kept his mouth shut, waiting to hear what Lucas’s response would be.

Lucas looked over to him, and then back at the doctor. “I really do feel much better. I don’t think I’ll need any help. I’m going to be fine on my own, really.”

“I appreciate that you feel better than you did before, Mr. Hale, but the truth of the matter is that you only have the use of one of your arms. Your bandages will need to be kept dry when bathing and changed until you are all healed up. You are going to be on painkillers, and although they are not as potent as what you have been receiving here, they will limit your ability to drive. You are going to need help. I’ve asked the nurses to provide you with information about temporary home care. Have you had a chance to look it over?”

“Well, yes, but I’m not staying in the area, and I can’t really afford to hire someone….”

“I see. Well, there must be a friend or family member who can help you.”

Lucas looked back at him, something unreadable in his eyes. Declan wasn’t sure if he was doing the right thing, but he couldn’t keep quiet any longer.

“I told you before, I have a guest room, and you’re welcome to stay with me for as long as you need to.”

“I really couldn’t do that.”

Well, that was better than “no fucking way.”

“Honestly, Lucas. It’s not a big deal. I have a house with lots of room. I live alone, and I work most of the time. I would be around to do things like bring home groceries and drive you to doctor’s appointments, but for the most part, I would be out of your hair.”

Lucas looked like he was giving it serious thought, before he nodded once, curtly, and said, “All right, if you’re sure it’s not a hassle.”

Declan wanted to jump up and down with excitement. He’d done it. He’d managed to get through to this guy and gain his trust, at least a little. Now he could work on getting Lucas to tell him exactly what had happened the day he was attacked.

“I’m sure.”

“All right then,” the doctor said cheerfully, “that’s all taken care of. I’ll hand your discharge papers off to the nurse. She’ll get you set up with meds for home and instructions on managing your bandages. If you have any questions, feel free to call your family doctor, or the nurses’s hotline. We’ll make follow-up appointments for you and we’ll see you in a few weeks. Take care.”

The doctor left and Declan went to the nurses’s station to collect the papers and the directives. He wanted to give Lucas a few minutes to get dressed and gather his things before they left.

The instructions were simple. Keep the bandages dry until everything underneath had healed completely. Change them every other day, or sooner if they’re looking a bit ragged or dirty. The fiberglass cast on his arm could get wet, but would need to be dried afterward. Medications were to be taken every four to six hours as needed, but not to be taken if the pain level was less than a four. Lucas was not to drive or consume alcohol while on the medication. The nurse wrote everything down for him and placed the extra bandages and a small bottle of pills in a plastic bag for him.

When he got back to the room, he saw Lucas standing in the center looking angry and a little embarrassed.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Declan asked.

“The doctor was right. I’m totally useless on my own.”

Declan didn’t understand until he looked behind Lucas and saw the scrubs the nurse had brought for him piled on the bed.

“I tried to get the pants on, but the stitches pulled when I leaned down to put my feet through. I don’t know if I can do the rest myself. It’s hard with one hand.”

Declan tried not to react to the words
hard
and
hand
being in one sentence. This was not the time to be getting hard, especially when he was about to get up close and personal with Lucas’s almost-naked body. It was everything he had been waiting for, and he prayed that he could keep the attraction under control enough that Lucas wouldn’t see it.

“Let me help you,” Declan said.

Lucas opened his mouth as if to protest, but shut it again without saying anything. Declan knew what was coming next, and he approached it with both excitement and apprehension. He had been there when the medics had cut Lucas’s clothes off, but he had been operating on pure panic and adrenaline. He hadn’t much noticed what Lucas looked like beneath the clothes. Now he was about to see it up close.