Who Do I Run To? (14 page)

Janelle
also made her promise to allow her to install an alarm system. Janiece was a little hesitant about that. She didn’t want to go getting all worried and afraid of her own home because some crazy-ass wife was out to stop her from taking her man. She knew that Kimberly was mostly talk. Once she got a hold of K.P., she made him agree to meet her to discuss the situation. She didn’t want to meet him at her place though, incase Isaiah came back and he was so desperate to see her that he agreed.

Chapter
Sixteen

“Kimberly, why did you do this to yourself, baby?” he asked her. He was standing in her hospital room nervous as hell. She had taken some sleeping pills and his son called him when he was on his way to meet Janiece at a coffee shop not too far from her house.

“Mommy won’t wake up,” his son said on the phone.
K.P. told him to shake her hard and call her name. “I am Daddy, but she won’t wake up,” he said crying.

“Where’s
Kayla?” he asked KJ, and he put her on the phone.

“Daddy
, I’ve tried to wake Mommy, but she won’t get up. I don’t know what to do Daddy, she won’t wake up,” she said hysterically. “Daddy, please come home,” his daughter cried. Immediately, K.P. turned his truck around and headed back south on the highway. He was in such a panic he forgot to call Janiece. When he got home he dashed up the steps two at a time. Entering the master bedroom, he found his kids crying and still trying to wake Kimberly up. She was on the bed naked, and she was out.

He checked her pulse and was relieved to know she was still alive. He dialed 911 and tried to wake her.
Quickly he searched the room looking for what she took and found a prescription bottle with her name on it that he didn’t even know she had.

“Oh no
, Kim, baby, what did you do sweetheart?” He continued to shake her and talk to her, trying to make her open her eyes. “Baby, please don’t do this to us. The kids need you baby. Now open your eyes,” but she didn’t respond.

He sent the kids to their rooms and went and got her robe. He held her and cried
until the ambulance arrived. Once they departed, he followed behind with the kids and called her parents to meet him at the hospital. He was praying, asking God to save her because he didn’t want her to die. Why would she pull this type of stunt? Kimberly couldn’t have loved him that much to do this to her children. They needed her more than she needed him. She loved her children. No way would she leave them like this, he thought to himself. Once they arrived at the hospital, Kimberly was rushed into the ER and K.P. and the kids were left in the waiting area.

“Is
Mommy all right?” KJ asked him.

“She
’s going to be fine. Don’t worry, son.”

“Are you leaving us too
, Daddy? Mommy said you don’t want to be with us anymore. She said Ms. Janine is going to take you away from us,” Kayla said, getting Janiece’s name wrong.

“No baby
, Daddy would never leave you guys. Don’t worry your pretty little head about what Mommy said. Everything is going to be fine, I promise.” He hoped he was right about that. He had no idea what was going to happen with Kimberly. He was scared himself of what would happen. He finally got the kids to calm down, and then Kimberly’s parents walked in with their housekeeper Kami. She got the kids and took them with her to Kimberly’s parents’ house.

The
Grayson’s didn’t ask any questions because they could see that K.P. was in no shape to answer anything. Besides, he was waiting to hear from the doctor. They sat there a few minutes in silence, and finally the doctor came out to talk to them. He asked to speak with K.P. because he was her husband, and her parents understood. The doctor said she was fine, but he was going to keep her a couple days to keep an eye on her. He told K.P. that she would have to meet with the mental health physician who would determine when she could go home.

“Can I go in to see her now?” he asked
.

T
he doctor said yes, but only one at a time. So Mr. and Mrs. Grayson advised K.P. to go in first. He followed the doctor and went in to see her. He sat in the chair by her bed and looked at her natural skin and her mangled hair. She’d probably die if she saw herself in the mirror, because she was always the jazzy never-catch-me-on-a-bad-day diva. Kimberly didn’t go to the local grocery store without makeup. He smiled at her looking so natural without all the makeup and fake lashes.

Kimberly
smiled a weak smile when she opened her eyes and saw K.P. looking at her. He wanted to ask her a million questions, but he declined. She struggled to sit up because her stomach was sore after being pumped out. He helped her, and she tried to talk.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“No, baby, don’t worry about it right now. Just rest.”

“Are you leaving me here by myself?”

“No, I’m going to stay here with you ’til they let you come home.”

“You’re going to stay here with me?” she
repeated, and the tears started rolling. He wiped them, but he was angry that she had gone that far to try to keep him from leaving.

“Kim
, we are going to be all right. Don’t worry, okay? I don’t want you to worry. Your parents are here, and they want to visit with you, too.”

“You called my parents?”

“Yes, I was horrified. I wasn’t sure what would happen to you. I had to call them.”

“Did you tell them what I did?”

“No, I told them that you took the wrong pills by accident, so they don’t know.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want them to know
, K.P.,” she cried.

“Kim
, the doctor talked to me in private. He didn’t talk to your parents. They don’t know. Now, I’m going to get your mom, because the doctor said only one at a time, okay?”

“Okay, but don’t leave
, K.P., please don’t leave.”

“Baby
, I’m not leaving. I’ll be right outside and when they are done, I’ll come back in.”

“
All right,” she said, and K.P. went out so her mom could come in.

He went back out to the waiting room
. Her dad didn’t say much, and K.P. was glad he didn’t. He went to the nurse’s station and filled out some papers for his wife to be admitted. When her parents were done, he walked them out. Then he moved his car from the area where he was and parked where visitors were supposed to park. When he got ready to get out, he noticed the KBanks Jeweler’s bag on the passenger-side floor and realized that Kayla must have put it on the floor when she got in the truck.

He took the black velvet box out of the bag and stuck it in the glove box. Before going back inside he called Janiece to tell her what was going on, but she didn’t answer. He left her a message that it was urgent that she call him. He went back into the hospital and asked what room they put his wife in. He heard his cell phone alert that he had no signal. That figures
, he thought to himself. He got on the elevator. Why would Kimberly do something so crazy like try to commit suicide? He had a mind to take custody of his children from her. He vowed he’d never do that to her, but her suicide attempt changed everything.

He knew she was a good mother
, but it was plain ole selfish of her just to decide to kill herself—unless she was just trying to scare him, he thought. She was a spoiled brat who always wanted things her way, and he would not have been surprised if she faked it.

When he got to her room he saw she wasn’t in her bed and figured she was in the bathroom. When she came out
, he helped her back into her bed. She complained about her stomach being really sore, and he wanted to say, “That’s what you get for taking a bottle of sleeping pills,” but he didn’t.

“Why can’t I go home?” she asked.

“Because the doctor wants to evaluate you in the morning.”

“For what?” she snapped.

“For what—Kimberly, you tried to kill yourself. Why do you think they want to evaluate you?”

“Well
, I’m fine. I just need a comb and my makeup bag and to get out of this hideous gown.”

“Kim
, what is wrong with you? You’re acting like you didn’t do anything. What you did or tried to do to yourself is a big deal. What were you thinking, and our babies were there Kim,” he said, angry and confused. He didn’t want to stress her out, but he had to know.

“I don’t know
, okay!” she yelled. “I just wanted to stop the pain. I just wanted the pain to go away. I wanted to sleep and wake up with all the pain gone. I feel like I’m losing my mind and my life, Kerry. I just want to make this work. I just want our marriage to work,” she said and started to sob.

“And killing yourself was going to make our marriage work
, Kim? Swallowing a bottle of pills was the answer? Kim, help me to understand. You could have been dead. Have you thought about that?”

“Would you even have cared
, Kerry? That probably would have made you happy.”

“Kim
, stop making this about me. What about Kayla and KJ? Have you thought about them?”

“I have, have you?”

“Yes, I have!” he yelled and quickly caught himself. He was in a hospital. He didn’t want to make things worse. The last thing he needed was for some shrink making him out to be the bad guy.

“Look
, Kim, I think about my kids all the time. I don’t want to make them miserable by faking the funk. I don’t want my unhappiness to trickle down on them. I won’t be doing my kids a favor by staying where I’m not happy. Kayla and KJ will adjust, so don’t think I don’t think about my kids. You, on the other hand, didn’t think of them today when you swallowed those damn pills. You were going to leave them to be without a mother.”

“You’re leaving them to be without a father for some tramp
,” she spat back at him.

“Stop it; I’m not going there with you
, so let’s just end this right now.”

“Why
, Kerry? Why can’t you understand what you are putting me through?”

“Kim
, what do you want me to do? Stay?”

“Yes,” she said sadly.

“And then what? We walk around the house like we have been doing for the past year with no words, no time spent with each other, and no lovemaking? That’s how you want it, Kimberly?” he asked, and she was quiet. She began to cry again, and that he hated. He hated to see Janiece cry, and he hated to see Kimberly cry, because he remembered how his mom used to cry trying to raise him by herself when he was younger. Seeing a woman cry was the worst thing for him.

“No
, I just wanted you to love me. I just want my husband. No woman wants to let her husband just walk out the door and go to another woman. I can’t help that my heart loves you, Kerry, but if you don’t see any way that we can be together, then fine,” she said with the tears flowing.

She turned her body around and put her back to him. He knew she didn’t mean that shit, so he didn’t say another word. He grabbed the corded remote hanging on the side of her bed and turned on the television. Of course
, they had a nice big private room so the television was quality. He reclined in the leather La-Z-Boy and flipped through the channels.

When h
e heard her whimpering, he didn’t know what to say. So instead, he got up and went down the hall to get a coke and spotted the pay phones. Since he had no service on his cell phone, he tried Janiece again. When she didn’t pick up her house phone, he dialed her cell, and she still didn’t answer. He took his soda and went back to the room. Kimberly still had her back turned and was still sobbing. He rubbed her back trying to comfort her and let her know that he did care that she was hurting, but he couldn’t stay with her; he didn’t love her, and he couldn’t live another year like he was living.

“Kim
, baby, I’m so sorry. I never wanted to see you hurt, you gotta believe me. If there was another way, I would do it, but I promise you that I’m not deliberately trying to hurt you,” he told her and was thankful and surprised that she didn’t respond. He sat back on the recliner and flipped through the stations again.

After an hour
, Kimberly was sleeping. He called her parents from the phone in the room to check on the kids, and then he walked back down the hall and tried calling Janiece again. She didn’t answer. He was so tempted to go by her place, but he didn’t want Kimberly to wake up and find him missing. Finally, he called it a night and walked back to the room. He was relieved that Kim was still asleep when he got there. He looked at her caramel skin and high cheekbones. Her hair was nice and wavy. He never could understand why she was addicted to weave.

He wasn’t very attracted to her when they first met, but it wasn’t because she wasn’t a beautiful woman, because she was
. She just wasn’t what he’d go for back then. He looked at the little light freckles on her nose and smiled because his daughter Kayla had them too, just like her momma. He wished he could have fallen head over heels in love with Kimberly, like he had fallen for Janiece. He wished he could turn back the hands of time and not have married Kimberly. He wished he would not have listened to her tell him that he’d grow to love her that night before their wedding.

Had h
e called it off, he would not be in the situation where he was now, ripping her heart apart. He thought he loved her some days, but he knew that wasn’t true because the way he loved Janiece wasn’t this day or that day; it was every day. He knew he was in love with Janiece when they went to Vegas. He didn’t want to get on the plane to come back. He remembered that scene from Harlem Nights, when Sunshine made that cat call home and said, “Put your momma on the phone; look, I ain’t never coming home no more; take it easy,” and hung up. He wanted to do that, but he couldn’t do that to his kids.