Authors: Susan Edwards
White Cloud leaned forward, elbows on knees, head resting in his bands. No one needed to remind him of his good fortune, that Sarah and Wild-Flower had survived their ordeal at the hands of the white men.
He lifted his head, one hand rubbing the weariness and shock as if to wipe it away. If only he had known before leaving her that Emily would give birth to a child conceived that wonderful summer so long ago. His face pinched with pain. His lungs contracted painfully and his breath came in shallow gasps. He shook his head because in his heart, even if he’d known, his fate had been sealed. He could have done nothing different.
White Cloud stood and leaned over the bed, gathering the courage to study his newfound daughter, something as yet he’d not been brave enough to do. Tears formed in his eyes. His heart hammered, the pulse echoing in his ears as his mouth worked silently. He stared in amazement as he studied each and every delicate feature. White Cloud drew a raspy breath. Sarah’s features were so like her mother’s, the years melted away and he beheld his lost love again.
Tears coursed down his wrinkled leathery cheeks as he remembered the gentle young woman he had loved and cared for. Their time together had been short, but Emily had meant so much to him that thoughts of her rekindled an ache in his old heart, even after all these years.
Looking upon Sarah, White Cloud knew he would never forget that summer with Emily. He also hoped Small Bird would accept White Wind into their family as his eldest child, for he knew he would never turn his back on her. Wild-Flower already looked upon White Wind as her sister, and Running Wolf did not seem to mind that he now had an older sister, and was even showing signs of brotherly protection, much to Golden Eagle’s annoyance.
As the minutes ticked by, White Cloud became immersed in long-buried memories, became the young man he had once been. Taken in by his father’s brother when his parents were brutally murdered, he had grown up with tribal warring. And when he’d become old enough to participate, he’d gone on raids, become part of the vicious cycle of tribe retaliating against tribe.
And then, scenes from that wondrous peaceful summer when he’d roamed at will flashed across the lids of his closed eyes. The miles of earth he’d walked across, the long, solitary hours spent on top of a mountain, listening to the wind, and the nights sleeping out in the open, the tall prairie grass hiding him from his enemies, the dark sky filled with bright flickering light.
Suddenly, he frowned, the stars in his mind obscured by the thick smoke from the burned wagon. In quick flashes came the image of the white girl, curled in a fetal position, crying, alone and frightened.
As long as he lived, he knew he’d never forget those months shared with the white girl. That summer had been one of the happiest times of his life. Their love grew stronger each day, unlike anything he’d ever known, but it was not destined to be. His arranged wife-to-be awaited his return. The pain of leaving Emily was as sharp and piercing today as it had been eighteen years ago.
A moan reached his ears, followed by another. White Cloud’s eyes flew open, his mind cleared of past memories when he realized the soft moans were coming from White Wind, not from him.
Sarah tossed restlessly, her covers twisting around her hot body, whimpers of pain escaping her gasping lips, as her body fought the return to consciousness. White Cloud picked up the cloth that Golden Eagle had laid aside and gently wiped her face, squeezing some moisture onto her parched lips.
“Come, daughter, leave the dream world behind. Open your eyes. You are safe now,” he coaxed his daughter in a trembling husky voice.
Eyes the color of snow-fed streams flickered open, glazed with fever, and quickly closed as another spasm of pain racked her young body.
White Wind’s pain became his as he reassured both of them, “You will heal quickly, daughter. You are strong and brave. Do not fight the pain. Breathe deeply. That’s it. Slowly now.”
Slipping his arm carefully beneath her head, White Cloud gently raised her head and coaxed her to drink a few sips of the cool pain-numbing tea.
White Cloud held his daughter until she relaxed, the herbs numbing her pain and easing her fever.
Sarah opened her eyes again as the pain subsided to a dull throbbing and stared at the stranger leaning over her. She blinked her eyes, but couldn’t seem to focus or think clearly. She didn’t even know where she was, but there was something she desperately needed to know. If only the clouds hovering over her would stay away until she thought of what it was.
Her hand went to her throat, but the necklace was gone, her eagle. “Golden Eagle,” she croaked, nightmarish flashes of the scene with Willy coming at her fast and furious
.
The last thing she remembered was Willy aiming his gun at Golden Eagle.
She panicked and tried to rise, but a cry of pain escaped as her shoulder, stiff and sore, protested with sharp, piercing throbs. Gasping, tears blurring her sight, Sarah sobbed in barely audible words, “Golden Eagle. Golden Eagle. Where are you?”
Strong hands gently held her still, urging her to remain calm. She tried to fight, but had no strength. The desire to yield to the fog surrounding her was overwhelming as the herbs worked to claim her mind once again. Her eyes closed against her will. Her pain eased. Sarah struggled to focus on the words being spoken near her ear.
“Rest easy, daughter. Golden Eagle is well. Your actions this day have saved his life. Soon you will be strong and see for yourself. Sleep now.”
Relief flowed through her. Safe. The stranger’s voice kept whispering over and over. Her hands gravitated toward her middle. “My baby,” she whispered weakly.
“The child within you is safe. Now hush, daughter. No more questions. When you are well, we will talk. Sleep now,” the soothing voice commanded.
Sarah let her body relax to the soft harmonic crooning. But something kept tugging at her. He called her daughter. That wasn’t right. Her father was dead. No, her pa was dead. Her brows wrinkled in confusion. She didn’t know her father yet. But why…
White Cloud rose as Sarah’s breathing deepened and once again she fell into a long, deep, healing sleep.
All the next day Sarah slept, waking only for brief moments to accept water, teas and soup that were spooned into her mouth. She slept, oblivious to hands that bathed her with cool rags, and never heard any of the commotion of people coming and going.
Mary allowed Golden Eagle to take over Sarah’s care, relieving him so he could eat and rest. Many times White Cloud and Hawk Eyes also came in to sit at her side. For two more days, heat raged through Sarah’s body as she fought off infection.
On the evening of the third day, the outside door opened tentatively to admit Wild-Flower and Red Fox. Gingerly, they stepped into the darkened room, casting a warm glow onto the shadowed wall as they entered, Wild-Flower carrying a candle-lit lantern.
Wild-Flower glanced around in curiosity as she set the lantern down. “Healing-Woman asked me to bring you this light-flame.”
With Red Fox at her side, as she’d been nervous about entering the large wooden house, Wild-Flower’s eyes grew round as she took in a way of life she’d only heard about, but never seen.
“How is White Wind, my brother?” Red Fox inquired, noting Sarah’s pale, drawn features.
Golden Eagle sighed deeply. “She is resting, my friends. The Healing-Woman says exhaustion is causing her to sleep so long. She says the wound is healing and the heat seems to have left her body. I will wait for White Wind to awaken and show me she is recovering,” Golden Eagle declared.
Wild-Flower approached and looked down at the sleeping white girl. Sitting on the opposite side, she put her hand over her sister’s relaxed fingers. “Father has told me we are sisters. I like this idea of being sister to your White Wind. An older sister is welcome, and I will be aunt to your children as well.”
Grinning mischievously, Wild-Flower added, “Our fathers sit under the full moon planning our weddings and discussing their first grandchild. You were right, Golden Eagle. The
Wakan Tanka
showed our fathers his true path.”
Sobering, she looked to Red Fox, love shining brightly as she grasped his hand, careful of the bandages Healing-Woman had insisted on applying. Wild-Flower shuddered as she recalled just how close she’d come to being trapped in that burning building.
After Sarah had been taken out by the white man, sparks and burning pieces of the brittle dry roof had fallen in, igniting everything they touched. Bound to the wooden bed frame, Wild-Flower could not flee the hungry flames. Desperate, she’d managed to retrieve the knife that Willy had dropped and forgotten.
But it took her too long to cut the ropes. By then smoke filled the room, making it impossible to see the doorway.
In her dreams she still saw the flames licking at the old mattress, heard the crackling and popping noises made by the fire as it consumed the entire space around her.
Just when she’d given up hope, sounds of ripping and tearing had her searching the smoke-filled room, her eyes burning and her lungs near to bursting for air. Red Fox had ripped off the rotting boards at the back to lead her out. She’d never forget the relief that had surged through her when she felt his strong arms lift and carry her, coughing,
gasping, past angry flames to safety. Even now, she had to fight her apprehension at just being in a wooden building again.
A light touch brought her eyes up as Golden Eagle’s strong hand helped her to her feet. Wild-Flower nodded her head in silent acknowledgment. “We leave you now. I will tell Father that White Wind still sleeps.”
Golden Eagle watched Red Fox and Wild-Flower leave, happy that things had worked out so well for them. Turning back to White Wind, Golden Eagle carefully stretched out beside her and closed his eyes.
A dull throbbing ache invaded Sarah’s safe warm cocoon, bringing her out of her deep sleep. She attempted to snuggle closer to a warmth that even in her unconscious state she knew represented safety and comfort, a haven from nightmares and pain.
Her movement, slight though it was, brought a sharp stab of pain to her shoulder, causing eyes clear of fever to fly open. Black shadows lurked on walls of wood, thrown there by the lone low-burning candle. Sarah took careful calm breams until the pain subsided as one of her dream voices had instructed.
A puzzled look entered her shadowed eyes. Had it been a dream? She was still groggy and disoriented and she knew she had been hurt, but where? Experimentally, she moved each limb.
First she moved her legs, one at a time. She sighed. They were a bit stiff, but otherwise all right. Likewise, she could move her right arm, but when she attempted to move her left arm, burning shafts of fireballs tore through her, causing her to bite her lower lip until she tasted blood. She forced herself to remain still, and continued the slow deep breathing until the pain returned to a dull throb.
Opening her eyes again, Sarah moved only her head as she looked around, trying to get her bearings. Her eyes fell on a crudely made corner chair with its embroidered pillow—her first attempt at embroidery, she fondly recalled. She relaxed as her eyes lit upon item after item of familiarity. She was home. A soft smile tilted her lips and she sighed. Home. What a sweet sound that had.
Wait. This wasn’t home. Not anymore. Home was a pallet of furs on the ground, walls of sewn-together buffalo hides. Home was Golden Eagle’s tipi. Where was he? Sarah panicked, and just then felt movement beside her. Fearfully she turned, and found herself nose-to-nose with the most wonderful sight of all. Golden Eagle!
Lifting her good arm to his smooth face, unable to see clearly, Sarah spoke, her voice hoarse with disuse. “You weren’t hurt? Willy didn’t shoot you? I’m not dreaming, am I?”
“No, my sweet one. I am unharmed.” His brows drew together suddenly. “Except for the scare you gave me. Do not ever step between me and my enemy again. I forbid it,” Golden Eagle commanded as he slid off the bed and gently lifted her head, careful not to jar her wound and cause undue pain. Placing a cup of cool water to her dry cracked lips, he urged her to sip. When she had her fill, he carefully laid her back and checked her shoulder dressing for signs of fresh bleeding.
Sarah sighed with relief, but thoughts of Willy made her look anxiously around. Her chin was tipped toward Golden Eagle. “You will never have to worry about the one who caused so much pain to us all,” he reassured her. “He will never bother anyone again.”
Sarah closed her eyes and shuddered, blocking out the horrible nightmare. She was thankful that she’d never have to worry about Willy again, but a small part of her was sorry that it had had to end the awful way it did.
“No regrets, White Wind. Your guardian chose his path,” Golden Eagle said, recognizing the look of sorrow on Sarah’s face.
“I know.” A fragment of a dream came back to her and she concentrated, drawing her brows together as she tried to remember. Her father? She’d dreamed her father had
sat here beside her. Was that possible? No, she must’ve been dreaming. “Some dream. I just wish it had been true,” she said more to herself man to Golden Eagle.
“What dream? What are you talking about, White Wind?” Golden Eagle asked.
Sarah smiled in the semi-darkness and spoke softly. “I had a dream. A strange wonderful dream.”
Receiving a nod of encouragement, Sarah continued. “I dreamed my father sat here, holding my hand, talking to me, but how can that be? We don’t even know who he is yet or if he still lives,” Sarah sighed regretfully.
Golden Eagle got to his feet and tucked the covers gently around her shoulders. “I’ll be right back,” he promised.
A few minutes later, the door opened, but the bed was back under the loft and Sarah couldn’t see who entered.
Golden Eagle reappeared, and behind him stood three people. She recognized one. “Wild-Flower! You’re safe,” she exclaimed, struggling to sit. Golden Eagle helped her sit and sat behind her, supporting her.
Sarah leaned back, fighting waves of tiredness but not wanting to sleep anymore. Wild-Flower came and stood at the foot of the bed, grinning. “It is good to see the sister of Wild-Flower awake.”
Before Sarah could reply another person came into view. After a few moments, Sarah recognized him to be Wild-Flower’s older brother. “This warrior is very happy to see both his sisters alive and well. Running Wolf welcomes White Wind as his sister.”
Sarah nodded in return, perplexed. But before she could question his odd statement, an older man came forward, tears in his eyes. But unlike Wild-Flower and Running Wolf, he came right to the side of her bed and reached for her hand.
Golden Eagle leaned forward. “White Wind, this is Chief White Cloud, father to Running Wolf, Wild-Flower and…to you. This, White Wind, is your father.”
Sarah stared speechlessly. “How…?”
White Cloud spoke. “It is a story that I will tell you when you are stronger. For now, know that we are your family and welcome you, firstborn child to Chief White Cloud.” He motioned Running Wolf and Wild-Flower to join him.
Tears welled and spilled down Sarah’s cheeks. She lifted a corner of her blanket to wipe her eyes as she stared from one face to another, always returning to her father’s as the talk turned to general news. Sarah did find out that she had one more sister and two more brothers. A family! She now belonged to a large family.
White Cloud rose as Sarah struggled to keep her eyes open, and her mind focused on the talk around her. He motioned his two children out. “There has been enough excitement this day. White Wind must rest now.” He held his hand up to still Sarah’s protest. “Do not fight your need to rest And do not argue with your father. Your eyes keep dropping,” his voice chided gently.
“You’ll be here tomorrow?” Sarah asked, half afraid he would be gone in the morning.
“Yes, daughter. When
Wi
shows her face, I will return to your side,” White Cloud promised as he turned and left.
Sarah sighed and leaned back, her strength gone. “Oh, I’m so tired, but I don’t want to sleep. I’m afraid I’ll wake up and find out it was just a dream.”
Golden Eagle got up and stretched out beside Sarah, tucking her close beside him, mindful of her injury. “It’s no dream. Your father is here. Hush now. Let us rest.”
Nodding her blond head, Sarah relaxed next to her golden warrior, and before she knew it she had fallen asleep, her heart lightened by the prospect of seeing her new family on the new day.
Six weeks later, Sarah paced restlessly across the wooden porch, her boots thumping in agitation as she stopped to scan the countryside. But seeing nothing of interest in the watery-blue horizon, she gave a sigh of impatience and resumed her pacing.
Standing just inside the doorway, Mary shook her head in exasperation. Stepping outside, clucking her tongue, she gently scolded, “It will do you no good to get so worked up, young lady. Your husband will be here any day for you, and your pacing and pathetic sighs will not bring him here any faster. Now sit and eat. What will he say if he finds you in ill health from all this needless worry?”
“But Mary, it’s been such a long time already. What if something happens to him? What if he doesn’t return for me?” Sarah worried aloud, chewing her lower lip. Her fingers tangled in her necklace as she worried the beads, eagle, locket and the newest addition—a small wooden carving of feet with outstretched wings.
Mary pulled forth a rocker with a thick padded seat and waited for Sarah to seat herself. From her first day out of bed, Sarah had taken to spending most of her convalescing hours sitting on the porch, claiming she felt closer to Golden Eagle as she imagined him staring at the same blue sky.
“That’s enough, Sarah. Golden Eagle will be here before you know it. Why, it took all of us to convince him to leave you here for your own good, so you could recover and get back your strength when the time came to return with his people. He’ll be here any day, you mark my words. Now sit and eat. I have my chores to do yet and cannot stand here holding your lunch all day.”
Sarah flung herself into the chair, took the proffered tray of bread, meat and fruit and watched Mary retreat into the house. She would miss Mary when the time came for her to leave. Tears gathered, and her eyelids drooped with sadness. With a determined shake of her head, she put her depressing thoughts aside. Tears, it seemed, came easily to her these days.
Sarah forgot her sad thoughts as her stomach growled, reminding her of her hunger. She quickly ate every morsel of the meal Mary had prepared for her.
Fully recovered from the gunshot wound, she now only experienced a bit of stiffness and tenderness. As each day of her recovery passed, her appetite grew, as did her belly. The baby was growing rapidly and becoming stronger each day.
Looking at her bulging abdomen, Sarah smiled, and laughed aloud when the tray resting against it moved ever so slightly, threatening to tip over. Removing the tray, Sarah patted her belly. “Won’t your father be surprised to see how you have grown?” She leaned her head back, closed her eyes and took a few moments to rest.
The movements of the baby had become much more noticeable in the past few weeks. Last week a definite kick had startled her, causing her to drop and break a bowl she’d been washing.
A short time later, Sarah rose, unable to sit any longer in the weak warmth of the sun. What to do now? As Golden Eagle was due any day, she had already packed her things.
Leaning against one of the supporting pillars, Sarah frowned as she remembered the day he’d left to return to his home without her. It had been decided, not by her, that she would stay and remain under Mary’s care to heal and recover her strength before making the long trip back to the Black Hills.
Golden Eagle had been reluctant to leave her, but Mary bad pointed out that she was safe in her own home now, and she and Ben would nurse Sarah back to health so she could make the journey without endangering their baby.
The two chiefs had also agreed. They each needed to get back to their tribes and prepare for the moves down to the prairie for the summer celebrations. The summer celebrations would also include a combined wedding feast between the two tribes.
Sarah and Wild-Flower had decided they wanted to be married in a double ceremonial, but as Sarah was to remain behind to heal, Golden Eagle and Red Fox had convinced the two chiefs to perform a simple ceremony at the house, allowing Mary and Ben to take part in Sarah’s wedding. A more elaborate ceremony and the celebrating and feasting would follow upon Sarah’s return to her tribe.
So here she sat waiting impatiently for her husband to fetch her. It was mid-September, more than a month since Golden Eagle had left.
Already nature had changed her seasons. The leaves were turning color and the air was much cooler in the mornings. Soon the rains would turn to snow.
“This is ridiculous! I can’t sit here any longer,” Sarah exclaimed as she pushed open the door and went inside. In the small kitchen area she helped Mary in an attempt to keep busy, but as her mind was not on the chores, she was more in the way.
When Sarah’s absent-minded fumbling caused her to drop a heavy cast-iron pan onto the floor, startling Mary, who nearly cut herself peeling potatoes, Mary’s nerves snapped.
“Out! You’re nearly as bad as Ben in the kitchen today, child. Out with you till you can keep your mind on what you’re doing,” she ordered the sheepishly grinning girl.
“Oh, Mary. I’m sorry. What can I do? I’m going crazy just sitting and waiting. I’m not used to this. At Golden Eagle’s village there is so much to do that this waiting is killing me,” Sarah wailed as she apologized.
Mary shook her head. Oh, to be young and in love again. She had an idea and snapped her fingers. “Why don’t you go for a short ride before dinner? Ben is somewhere out in the yard working today. Ask him to go with you,” she suggested.
Sarah’s eyes brightened. “What a wonderful idea, Mary. What would I do without you?” Sarah sobered as her words hit home. “What will I do without you, Mary?”
Mary blinked her tears away and replied gruffly, wondering what she’d do without Sarah around, “You’ll do just fine, young lady. I didn’t raise you to be attached to my apron strings, now did I? Now, away with you, you scamp. I’ve got dinner to see to. Don’t be late now,” she instructed as she shooed Sarah out.
A few minutes later Sarah rode leisurely toward the meadow, leaving Ben to follow behind at his own pace. Slowly, she guided her horse to the center of the field and looked around.
Dismounting, she led the horse to the tree where she and her pa had had their last picnic together, and tethered the animal loosely so he could nibble at the grassy shoots.
Ben, she noticed, had remained at the edge of the woods, still seated on his horse, whittling on a piece of wood, chips flying in all directions. Sarah thought of all the intricate wood carving Ben had done for her to give to her new families.
She smiled as she pulled out her necklace, the number of dangling objects increasing. Just before leaving the barn, Ben had presented her with a new charm. The miniature of Great Star left no doubt in her mind that Ben was competing with Golden Eagle and her father. Ben’s eyes never left Sarah’s wandering form for long. He knew Mary would skin him alive if anything further happened to Sarah. A movement in the woods behind Sarah caused him to reach for his rifle.
Recognition dawned in his craggy old face when he caught sight of the warrior still hidden in the woods. His face broke out into a welcoming grin. Silently, he gave a wave of acknowledgment, and quietly took up his reins to head back the way he’d come.