Whisper (13 page)
A
lthough we ended up traveling a pretty sizeable distance, we chose not to fly.
lthough we ended up traveling a pretty sizeable distance, we chose not to fly.
Or rather, Bodhi and Messalina chose not to fly, Buttercup and I were forced to go along with it.
As it turns out, Messalina didn’t know how to fly. And even though I offered to teach her (figuring if I could teach Buttercup, I could teach anyone), Bodhi was quick to quash it, claiming we had to hurry—that we didn’t have time—and so we boarded a train instead.
I sulked by the window, spending the majority of the ride taking furtive peeks at Bodhi and Messalina, their heads ducked in whisper, paying no mind to me. And after about three and a half hours of steadily rolling down the tracks, the train finally came to a stop, and I was the first to leap up. Sighing and shaking my head as I made for the
door, convinced that three and a half hours would’ve proved more than enough time to teach someone to fly.
door, convinced that three and a half hours would’ve proved more than enough time to teach someone to fly.
And, as it turned out, three and a half hours was also enough time to travel from Rome to Venice.
Yep, Venice, Italy—home of canals, grand old waterfront palaces, and gondola rides—a city I’d always dreamed of visiting.
A city so beautiful I couldn’t help but gasp as I struggled to take it all in.
A city so ripe with romance I couldn’t help but notice the little pang of regret at my own lost romance, no matter how fake it might’ve been.
We stopped in the middle of St. Mark’s Square, watching Buttercup drive himself bonkers by chasing after flocks of pigeons he couldn’t quite catch. Barking, and growling, and flying and leaping, trying in vain to make contact, and yelping in confusion every time he ended up flying right through them instead.
“Is someone ever going to tell him he’s dead?” I nodded toward my dog, knowing I was acting crabby, and grumpy, and worse, but I think I had good reason. Back in the Colosseum I’d acted nobly, heroically even. I’d willingly forfeited the Soul Catch to end all Soul Catches just so Messalina could be the master of her own happy ending—only to
become a burdensome third wheel to their impromptu party. Someone they had no choice but to drag along for the ride.
become a burdensome third wheel to their impromptu party. Someone they had no choice but to drag along for the ride.
“Listen, if you want to go on a gondola ride or something, feel free. Buttercup and I will wait here.” I slumped to the ground, made myself comfortable, determined to make the best of a not so great situation, but still unable to stop myself from adding, “I mean, all I did was help Messalina snare the Soul Catch of the century—something I probably won’t get any credit for—even though it was
my
idea—
my
words that awakened Theocoles. But hey, whatever, no biggie. I mean, it’s not like I’m not used to it by now—in fact, I—”
my
idea—
my
words that awakened Theocoles. But hey, whatever, no biggie. I mean, it’s not like I’m not used to it by now—in fact, I—”
Messalina looked at me, pressed a finger to her lips, and the gesture alone was enough to remind me.
I was doing it again.
Allowing myself to get lost in the soundtrack of my own sad story instead of what really, truly mattered—the fact that I was in Venice—something definitely worth celebrating. I mean, so what if they were planning to ditch me, at least I still had my dog.
“C’mere Buttercup!” I patted my knees, laughing in hysterics when he came bounding toward me, leaping with such enthusiasm I fell to the ground where I was instantly assaulted by a ridiculous amount of slobbery licks. “Alright
already!” I laughed, pushing him away and getting him settled beside me. But only for a moment before he was up again, paws dancing wildly as he thrust his nose into the air and barked at something behind me. “What is it? What is it boy?” I craned my neck, but still couldn’t see what he saw.
already!” I laughed, pushing him away and getting him settled beside me. But only for a moment before he was up again, paws dancing wildly as he thrust his nose into the air and barked at something behind me. “What is it? What is it boy?” I craned my neck, but still couldn’t see what he saw.
“Why don’t we go find out?” Bodhi said, motioning for us to follow as he traipsed down a maze of narrow, pedestrian-only alleyways, easing our way around hordes of tourists juggling armfuls of overflowing shopping bags, and slowing when we came to the door of a beautiful big old palace that butted right up against the water, as Bodhi waved us all through the locked door.
Buttercup sprinted ahead, barking in excitement as he tore up several flights of steep marble stairs, and it wasn’t until I’d reached the landing that I heard it.
It was a song—one that could never be mistaken for anything other than what it was.
It was a song I knew well, in fact, it was one of my favorites.
It was the birthday song—and they were singing it for me.
I burst into the room—my face beaming, my eyes moving among the crowd—amazed to see everyone that mattered to me (well, everyone that mattered who was dead, anyway). Waving to my parents, my grandparents too, along
with all the members of the Council, including: Royce, Claude, Celia, Samson, and Aurora (my not-so-secret favorite). Cheerleader Girl, also known as Jasmine, also known as Bodhi’s girlfriend, was there as well (probably more for Bodhi than me, but still, it was nice to see her). Even Mort, the guy who told me all about Dreamland had dropped by, along with Balthazar, the director of Dreamland, who stood alongside him. And when my gaze landed on Prince Kanta, who I hadn’t seen since my time on St. John, well, I couldn’t help but squeal in delight. He’d brought Rebecca with him, and her little dog Shucky was already playing a game of fetch with Buttercup. Even the Radiant Boys made an appearance (as it turned out, there were three), and I was happy to see that they’d ditched those gawd-awful little short sets they used to wear in favor of something way more contemporary. I mean, not that I cared—I was done judging people by their appearance (well, for the most part anyway). And while there were definitely a few people missing, namely the Weeping Woman, and Satchel the boy who makes nightmares, I decided not to focus on that.
with all the members of the Council, including: Royce, Claude, Celia, Samson, and Aurora (my not-so-secret favorite). Cheerleader Girl, also known as Jasmine, also known as Bodhi’s girlfriend, was there as well (probably more for Bodhi than me, but still, it was nice to see her). Even Mort, the guy who told me all about Dreamland had dropped by, along with Balthazar, the director of Dreamland, who stood alongside him. And when my gaze landed on Prince Kanta, who I hadn’t seen since my time on St. John, well, I couldn’t help but squeal in delight. He’d brought Rebecca with him, and her little dog Shucky was already playing a game of fetch with Buttercup. Even the Radiant Boys made an appearance (as it turned out, there were three), and I was happy to see that they’d ditched those gawd-awful little short sets they used to wear in favor of something way more contemporary. I mean, not that I cared—I was done judging people by their appearance (well, for the most part anyway). And while there were definitely a few people missing, namely the Weeping Woman, and Satchel the boy who makes nightmares, I decided not to focus on that.
Instead I focused on the song—and my friends—and the abundance of love and celebration that filled up the room. And when Bodhi stood before me holding a big, huge cake slathered in a thick coat of deep purple frosting—well, it seemed my birthday was complete.
“Corner piece is all yours—but only if you can blow out the candles in one breath,” he said, grinning at me.
One breath—something that’s a lot easier to accomplish when you’re not dead.
I stared at the corner piece, the one with the big, sugary butterfly plunked down on its side, filling myself with great swallows of air, determined to nail it, and that’s when I noticed something remarkable—the candles kept changing.
First there were thirteen.
Then there were fourteen.
Then fifteen.
Then back to thirteen again.
Once, it even went as low as twelve.
My gaze sought Aurora’s, looking for answers (she always had answers), and she was quick to explain when she said, “The choice is yours. Just know that whichever age you choose, you have our full blessing. We are so proud of you, Riley, so proud of the unselfish choice you just made. You’ve come a very long way.”
I gulped, returned my attention to the cake, and when it showed fifteen candles again, I thought:
Go! Do it! Then you can be equal with Bodhi! And then maybe he’ll—
Go! Do it! Then you can be equal with Bodhi! And then maybe he’ll—
But when I gazed at him again, I decided to let that one go. Some things just need to happen on their own. Some things cannot be forced.
Once I’d let fifteen go, it was easy to let fourteen go as well.
Been there—done that. And I knew with complete certainty that there was a really big difference between
looking
a certain age—and
feeling
a
certain
age.
looking
a certain age—and
feeling
a
certain
age.
I wasn’t ready for the big time. Not even close.
Reminded of what Ever had said that time we met up in Dreamland—that I was lucky—that I wouldn’t be forced into anything before I was ready—I would become a teen when the time was just right, not a moment earlier. And I had no doubt in my mind that my sister was right.
I’d been waiting to be thirteen for so long, I could hardly believe the moment had come.
But, I’d also had so much experience in the time since my death—I was no longer sure if it fit.
The candles flickered before me—adding—subtracting—over and over again.
And when my number finally appeared, I closed my eyes, sucked in a mouthful of air, and blew with all of my might.
Remembering to make a wish—you
always
have to make a wish.
always
have to make a wish.
And when I opened my eyes and looked down at myself, I saw that one of my wishes came true.
I wasn’t just thirteen—I was thirteen and a half—thank you very much!
It was an age I felt comfortable with—an age I’d earned—truly arrived at.
And, while my body was nowhere as impressive as it had been back in Rome, it also wasn’t nearly as stick figure–like anymore.
“If you wished for the corner piece, then your wish came true,” Bodhi said, setting the cake on the table and carving me a big, hefty slice.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I looked at him and rolled my eyes, but instead of that leading to a bickering session like it normally would, we both just cracked up.
Bodhi presented my piece and I was just about to dig in, when I remembered I wasn’t the only one with a birthday to celebrate. So I closed my eyes long enough to manifest a beautiful cupcake topped with pink creamy frosting and dotted with little bits of candy that shimmered like jewels.
Then after plucking one of the candles from my cake, and sticking it in the middle of the cupcake, I looked at the crowd assembled before me and said, “Would you guys mind singing ‘Happy Birthday’ again? But this time, sing it to my friend, Messalina. She never had a birthday party, and it seems a bit overdue.”
E
ven though I’d been waiting for it for years, even though I’d imagined it down to every last detail, as it turns out, my thirteenth birthday party wasn’t at all like I’d thought.
ven though I’d been waiting for it for years, even though I’d imagined it down to every last detail, as it turns out, my thirteenth birthday party wasn’t at all like I’d thought.
Not just because I never imagined myself dead at thirteen.
Not just because I chose to tack on an additional six months by making myself thirteen and a half.
Not just because it technically wasn’t a birthday party since it didn’t take place on the day of my birth (I didn’t know what day it was).
But mostly because for someone who’d spent most of my death feeling lonely and friendless, when I took in the crowd at my party, I realized I’d been anything but.
Okay, maybe I didn’t know most of them all that well. Maybe a good amount of them were just people I worked
with, people I once helped find their way to the Here & Now. But still, I’d spent so much time feeling alone that I was blinded to the fact that there was actually a whole team of people cheering me on.
with, people I once helped find their way to the Here & Now. But still, I’d spent so much time feeling alone that I was blinded to the fact that there was actually a whole team of people cheering me on.
Unlike Theocoles, I’d tuned out their roar of approval for my own (mostly negative) thoughts. But no more—those days were over.
“Riley, this is amazing!” Messalina lifted her napkin, dabbed at a blob of frosting that had found its way to her chin. “Are birthdays always like this? If so, I can’t wait to have another!”
“They’re not always like this,” I told her, jabbing my fork deep into a ball of sugary goodness. “But they should be.” I took another bite and smiled, my teeth frosted with a thick coat of purple.
And that’s when I saw him.
That’s when I saw him gazing at me from across the room in much the same way he’d gazed at me the very first time at Messalina’s never-ending party.
With curiosity.
And intensity.
Along with a healthy dose of unmistakable interest.
Though unlike the last time, his usual surplus of confidence was lacking—along with his height, muscles, and overall level of maturity. (But he had ditched the fancy toga
for jeans and a sweater, and that definitely worked in his favor.)
for jeans and a sweater, and that definitely worked in his favor.)
“He’s real?” I turned to Messalina, my head swirling with conflicting feelings of surprise and disbelief.
“He is indeed.” Messalina smiled and leaned toward me, about to brush a crumb from my cheek, then thinking better of it, thinking I might think that she was trying to enchant me again, she settled for motioning toward it instead.
“So he wasn’t just some soulless being you whipped into existence in order to keep me occupied?”
“Not even close. He truly was smitten the first moment he saw you. I had nothing to do with it.”
“Was he—was he really a senator’s son in his former life? Is that why he hung around for so long?” I bit down on my lip, wondering when he’d get the courage to cross the room and approach me.
Messalina shrugged. “Why don’t you ask him yourself?”
I hesitated, not sure I could go through with it. It was a large room that seemed even larger when I remembered how different I must’ve looked from the girl he’d first fallen for—a girl who’d recently transformed from Aurelia Major back to Aurelia Minor.
“Why not try?” she nudged. “You’ll never know until you try it, right?”
I sighed, figuring someone had to make the first move,
so it may as well be me. Besides, the party provided the perfect excuse. I was just being a good hostess. Making sure he was having fun. That’s all that it was. It didn’t mean anything more.
so it may as well be me. Besides, the party provided the perfect excuse. I was just being a good hostess. Making sure he was having fun. That’s all that it was. It didn’t mean anything more.
I’d just screwed up my courage, just started to leave, when Messalina grabbed hold of my hand and pushed something hard and cool into the center of my palm. Then closing my fingers around it, she said, “I’ll never forget the sacrifice you made on my behalf. You could’ve easily awakened Theocoles yourself, but instead, you gave the moment to me. I hope you’ll decide to keep this small token of my appreciation, and maybe even wear it on occasion, if you like. It’s a replica of the one that I wear.” She lifted her hand, wiggled her finger so that her ring caught the light. “Think of it as a symbol of our friendship. We may not be sisters, but I hope we’ll be friends.”
I slipped the ring onto my finger and held it up beside hers, deciding to keep it, to wear it every day. I liked the way that it looked, sure, but more importantly I liked the idea of having a friend so close we were almost related.
“And Theocoles?” My eyes met hers.
“I’m headed there now.” She smiled. “That is if you can make the veil for me, please?”
I closed my eyes long enough to envision the shimmering golden veil that would lead her to Summerland, the
bridge, and the world just beyond where she would join Theocoles.
bridge, and the world just beyond where she would join Theocoles.
And once that was done, once I waved her right through, I set off on my own journey—crossing the room to where Dacian stood.
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