Authors: Jerry S. Eicher
As if they'd been waiting for the final call,
Daett
and Steve came out of the barn and rushed across the yard.
Mamm
bustled about the kitchen, double-checking everything while they waited for the men to wash up. Sounds of splashing water came from the washroom sink, followed by footsteps.
Daett
led the way in. Steve followed, his face still wet and red from the cold water and towel rub. Susan almost laughed. He must be nervous if he scrubbed that hard.
“It's good to meet you,”
Daett
was saying as he extended his hand to Maurice.
“I'm so glad to be here, Mr. Hostetler,” Maurice said. “My daughter hasn't looked better or happier in her life. I can't thank you folks enough.”
“Please call me Menno. And this is Steve Mast, our hired hand. We've enjoyed having Teresa here. It is
Da Hah
's doing.”
Daett
continued. “We have Him to thank for what we have and for what we can give.” He turned to
Mamm
. “Is supper ready or not?”
“It's been ready for a long time,” Susan told him. “So don't be acting like we're to blame if it's cold.”
Daett
smiled, twinkles in his eyes.
“You have a lovely family, Mr. Hostetler,” Maurice said. “And a beautiful wife.”
“
Yah
, that is true,”
Daett
agreed. “Anna's been a jewel all the years I've known her. There couldn't be a better wife anywhere. And, please, it's Menno. We don't do mister and missus around here. At least not if you're part of the community or family.”
“I'm honored to be considered part of your family and community, even if it is only for a week or so,” Maurice said.
Daett
nodded. “Now, let's eat!”
“We will as soon as you stop talking long enough to pray,”
Mamm
said with a straight face.
They sat down at the table.
Daett
bowed his head, and the rest of them followed.
“Our gracious and heavenly Father, we give You thanks tonight for the rich and plentiful food on this table, for the willing hands that prepared it, and for the lives that are gathered here,”
Daett
prayed. “Bless us, O Father, with Your Holy Spirit and guide us in our walk with You. We seek to do Your will and to obey Your Word. We give You thanks tonight especially for Teresa and her
mamm
, Maurice. You have blessed Maurice with a safe trip and with a daughter who has blessed our lives these many months. Bless them now as they have blessed us. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
“Thank you,” Maurice whispered when they had raised their heads. “That was a nice prayer, and you are such wonderful people.”
“Well,”
Daett
protested, “we're not all that wonderful. We're just flesh and blood. Give
Da Hah
the thanks if there is any to be given.” He smiled to soften his words.
“That's right,”
Mamm
added. “Please pass the potatoes, Susan. And you can start the gravy, Teresa. There's plenty for everyone. I know we've all worked hard today, and there will be plenty of work tomorrow.”
“Wow! I haven't seen this much food in a long time.” Steve rubbed his flat stomach.
Mamm
glared at him. “Now don't tell me Ada doesn't cook up a good meal for you.”
“He's teasing,” Susan said, looking at her
mamm
. “And Joan told me he comes home starving every night. I'm sure he gets plenty to eat.”
“
Yah
, I was just teasing,” Steve assured
Mamm
as he took a large helping of potatoes. “A growing boy needs lots of sustenance! Where the food goes, I have no idea.”
“A working man needs his food,”
Daett
said. “You do more than your share in the fields. I know where the food goes.” Everyone laughed.
Daett
turned to Maurice. “How was your trip?”
“Just great, thank you,” Maurice replied. “And when I got here, I realized I needed different clothes. Your daughter Ada was kind enough to lend me some dresses.”
“Susan mentioned it.”
Daett
laughed. “It wasn't necessary, but you look very nice. I thought perhaps Teresa influenced you.”
“I suppose she hasâperhaps more than I know,” Maurice said. “I do know Teresa is really coming along well. I can't wait to meet this young man of hers.”
“Oh, he's nice enough,”
Mamm
said. “You'll like him, I'm sure.”
“If Teresa likes him, that's good enough for me,” Maurice said.
Minutes passed in silence while they ate. Susan broke the quiet. “Do you have to go back out tonight yet,
Daett
? Is the hayrack fixed?”
Daett
looked up. “
Nee
, but we can finish in the morning.”
“I'll stay and help. You know that,” Steve said, looking down at his empty plate.
Daett
shook his head.
“Anyone have room for pecan pie?”
Mamm
asked when everyone was finished.
Everyone eagerly admitted they did.
Mamm
got up and brought the pie over. She sliced it and spooned whipped cream on top of each piece before passing it down the table.
After eating a bite of pie, Maurice said, “This is delicious. And it's so peaceful around here. You can almost hear yourself breathe.”
“I guess I'm used to it,”
Mamm
said.
Steve placed his napkin on the table, pushed back his chair, and rose. “Thanks for supper. I do believe you're as good a cook as your daughter Ada.”
“I should be!”
Mamm
said with a smile. “I taught her all she knows.”
Steve laughed and left by way of the washroom door.
“I want to help with the supper dishes, Anna,” Maurice said. “I don't know much about the life you people live, but I do know how to wash dishes.”
“You don't have to,”
Mamm
told her. “You just arrived today. You should relax.”
“Please, I want to.”
Mamm
smiled and pointed toward the sink. “
Yah
, then. You can wash while we clean off the table. One of the girls will dry the dishes.” Noticing Menno heading toward the living room, she added, “Menno, there's a letter that came today for you on the desk.”
M
enno sat in the living room, the latest copy of
The Budget
unfolded in his lap, the letter Anna had mentioned in his hands. He glanced at the return address. Carol Hale, PO Box 3716, Fairway, Kansas. Menno read the name again. Do I know a Carol? He froze. This surely couldn't beâ¦could it? The Carol he knew years ago? He took a deep breath. Her last name wasn't Hale. At least it wasn't back then. But she could have married by nowâ¦
Menno's hand shook. He thought of the
kafuffle
over Teresa's arrival in the community months ago. Her arrival with Samuel had, much to his surprise, stirred up memories he'd tried so hard to forget. His nerves must still be on edge, he decided. He had never confessed his transgression to Anna. Some things were simply too awful to bring up. Dating Carol had been one such sinâand it led to even more sins. But hadn't
Da Hah
shown great mercy even before he'd fully repented of his sin? And then Carol had told him the baby had been lost. So what was there to confess now? He had confessed to
Da Hah
, of course. And He was the One who already knew everything.
With his hands still shaking, Menno opened the letter and read slowly.
Dear Menno,
I apologize first of all for using the term “dear” in the greeting, but Menno alone sounded too impersonal. I couldn't stand it. I'm sure you're surprisedâto say the leastâto receive a letter from me, if indeed this letter finds you. I'm guessing you're still part of the Amish community in which you were raised, but perhaps not. If this letter does find you, I'll trust that it was God's will. I'm surprised that I'm even writing to you. I never thought it would come to this, but it has.
Our child has found me, Menno. I guess first of all I owe you a confession. I lied all those years ago when I told you I had miscarried. In telling you I lost our child, I thought I was doing what was best for you and for me. Even so, I should have told you the truth.
And now, Menno, I have advanced ovarian cancer. I'm nearing the end and trusting I will soon see the face of God. I wish to be clear of this matter before that day. Even without Donald showing up, I have been greatly troubled through the years by how I treated you and our son.
The truth is that I was afraid of what you would do if you knew. The demands you might make. Your communityâthe little I knew of itâseemed threatening to me. And I didn't know how our baby would be accepted. I know it wasn't fair of me to keep this from you, and I apologize.
Donald, our son, was indeed born healthy, and I put him up for adoption, believing that was for the best. I do admit that part of me hoped he might eventually look for me. I left the best trail behind I could through the legal documents. And when he searched, he found me. He's a good young man, Menno. His adoptive father passed away several years ago, and his adoptive mother, Ruthann Fry, encouraged him to find me if that was his desire. I wish I could meet her, but it's not likely to happen. She did a wonderful job raising our Donald.
Now that I have met our son, I truly know what I have missed. Even my marriage and the birth of my three childrenâtwo boys and a girlâdid not ease the pain of what I lost with Donald. I feel I owe you and him at least an opportunity to meet. I'm coming clean on this matter, Menno. I'm leaving Donald my journal, and your name is in there.
I'm sorry, Menno, that this must come as such a shock. Perhaps I should have come to you in person to ask your forgiveness. Maybe I'm still not handling this correctly. But with my health, I'm not able to do anything beyond writing this letter.
I'm sure you've married and probably have a family of your own. I regret any pain and trouble this might cause you. But Donald has come to me, and I can't keep this secret any longer. Enclosed is Donald's address. I've told him about you, but I haven't revealed where you probably live.
He wants to meet you, Menno. And surely in your heart you wish to know him. Write to him, please.
With my sincere apologies again,
Carol (Henderson) Hale
Menno laid the letter aside, covering it with a page from
The Budget
. He closed his eyes. What would Anna think about this? An
Englisha
child! His
Englisha
child with his
Englisha
girlfriend from his service days during the war. He'd worked in a hospital in St. Louis instead of going to Vietnam as a soldier because he was Amish and, therefore, refused to fight. And what would Deacon Ray say? He couldn't confess it to himâ¦not Deacon Ray.
Anna had to be told. He had no choice. But when? He couldn't tell her now. There would be time later. They had a guest in the house, and Teresa's wedding was coming up. Nothing should be done before that. His past shouldn't mar the festivities. Teresa deserved that much consideration.
Sliding the letter into his pocket, Menno tried to read
The Budget
, but the words kept running together on the page.